Tracy R. Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 I have been wanting to make this post for several days, but I kept putting it off. One reason is cause I wasn't sure how it would be received since W30 isn't a weight loss program. The fact is though, I have a lot of weight to lose. I know I've lost some this month cause I'm down a size, almost 2 sizes. One reason I did the whole30 was to break my dependence on food as a way to comfort me. For eight years I was a foster mom for children with high needs (medical and/or behavior issues). I dealt with the stress of that by eating, and I ate a lot! I have some bad habits from that time period that I need to break and for the first time, I know I can. This W30 was the best decision I've made for myself in a long time. I feel great, I can tell the weight is coming off and I'm healing my body and bad habits at the same time!!!! Can you tell I'm excited? lol I know weight loss is not suppose to be a goal of a W30. (at least that is my understanding) But it's very hard for it not to be when you are living in a FAT body. I remember what it's like to be thin and in shape...to be able to bend over and pick something up off the floor and not feel your belly get in the way, to be able to see the numbers on a scale just by looking straight down (I know, shouldn't be on a scale anywho...I'm not right now, but by golly, I will be Oct 1st), to be able to walk up a small flight of stairs and not be winded, so many things I could mention...I remember and I want to experience life as a fit person again. I want my kids to know me as a fit mom, that can get out there and play with them. My two youngest only know fat mom, my middle child probably can't remember me being fit and my oldest has seen me with my bad habits for so long, that they have worn off on her. That's horrible! I have so much guilt and shame about that. Now that we aren't doing foster care and that stress and the heartache of that type of service has been lifted from me, I have the desire to take care of myself. We stopped almost one year ago from today. It wasn't till this past June when I cut wheat out of my diet and started feeling a change in my health that I started feeling there was hope for me to become the person I once was. Then I read ISWF in August (after following the blog for a couple of months) and I got so excited. I just knew this was key to me getting rid of my headaches, to help me break bad food habits and to change my relationship with food and yes!...to getting smaller too. I had done so much damage to my body and been fat for so many years, it was going to take something drastic to give my body the kick it needed. So, while I understand that weight loss is not the goal for a W30, it is something that is very important to me and my health. I don't think I'd be down almost 2 sizes if I was still just eating GF. I had dropped 15 lbs from June to July from going GF, but then nothing else. I know I've lost weight cause of how my clothes fit. I admit I can't wait to see how much I've lost. I am also seeing a difference in how I view myself and I'm not so afraid to be out among people. Because of the shame I felt from being so overweight, I kept to the background in groups much of the time, I didn't like meeting new people (I was always a social butterfly in my smaller past), I always felt people were judging me...I just didn't feel good about myself, so I figured nobody else would either. Now though, with this feeling of control that I'm gaining, I'm not so scared to put myself out there and meet people. Feeling my body change (and I'm not just talking about being in a smaller pair of jeans, I feel better overall!), knowing that by making good food choices I'm healing the damage I've done to my body, knowing that I'm teaching my kids proper nutrition now, knowing that there is a better way and that I can be successful with my desire to be fit and healthy...it has given me so much confidence. When I weighed myself at the start of the W30, I weighed 223.8 lbs and wore a tight size 22 pair of jeans. I'm 5'6" tall. It would be nice to know that I'm not the only one here that's this obese, to get to know others that have felt similar to how I feel and to encourage each other. If I am the only one, that's ok. I'll carry on with my W30, no problem. I'd also like to know if you came from something similar and have transformed yourself into a fit and healthy person now, by incorporating W30 into your paleo lifestyle. I welcome any and all tips, by anybody! I don't want to go back to my old ways, for sure. I know posting your weight is a pretty personal thing and not asking anybody else to do it. I wanted to put mine out there cause I felt it was one step in my journey of releasing the shame and guilt I've carried for years and as a way to be accountable because I have to get healthy. Living in an obese body sucks, but I know now that I'm not trapped in it. Thank you W30! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Wonderful post. Wish you every success in getting to where you want to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djoyce Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Tracy... No fear in posting weight here. I was 266.6 Lbs (but I am 6'1") and I am also classified as obese. I am on day 20 of my first W30 and I feel your pain. Not too long ago, I was 307 Lbs with poor eating habits and relative inactivity. Now I eat well, I workout regular and I try to accumulate as much knowledge on being fit and holistically healthy. I have been paleo for a while and W30 now. I workout anywhere from 5-8 times a week and I understand the difficulty in making a positive change. Don't let the turkey's get you down. My wife and my kids are real reasons for making positive changes in my life but the primary reason has to be desire to make you healthier. It sounds to me like your head is in the right place. Only with consistent and focused attention can we get to where we need to be! Go Tracy, Go Tracy!!! Cheers DJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renee Lee Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 I love this post Tracy! Thanks for sharing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jessica Orth Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Tracy, I'm on my 8th day and to read your post is so encouraging. I feel your pain, except, I have been out of shape my entire life. I don't even know what it feels like to be skinny. Sometimes I look at my friends in their cute clothes and just wonder what it must feel like to look like that. I'm not just doing this for weightloss, but it is also a large concern of mine. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism when I was 14. By the time I was 18, it spiraled out of control. My levels have never been normal since then and sometimes I will gain 20 pounds in as short a time period as 2 weeks. This I think is mostly water weight as when it has gotten this bad, I can't even fit my feet into normal shoes. But my thyroid isn't my only reason for gaining weight. I can blame it all that I want, but it really comes down to me and my choices. I may not have a very high metabolism, but eating whatever I want doesn't help that. It's an endless cycle of depression, low self confidence, eating to comfort those feelings, guilt for eating, depression, etc. That's why, for me, or anyone with a thyroid problem(I know you don't have one, just saying), it's important to stay active and to eat right. I have to go back to the doctor in a month for blood tests, I'm pretty sure I'm going to see a lot of improvements. I already have a lot of energy. i no longer suffer from insomnia. I have skinny ankles! (as skinny as they can be), I am not depressed. I don't feel guilt from food. I no longer have heartburn. This is just in 8 days. So, I hope you know you aren't alone. Sometimes I come on here and no offense, but I read a lot of posts from people who seem like they've already been fit for a long time or it's their 2nd or 3rd whole 30. It is comforting to hear from someone who is starting from scratch and I'm glad you had the drive to post for all of us. :-) Good Luck! You can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abaker711 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Tracy - Thank you for posting your story. I chose W30 with weight loss as my primary goal, and like you I think I was feeling a little out of place because of it. Naturally I would like to be healthier but I also want to be thinner . I am only on Day 3 but I am hoping to see drastic changes. I have been overweight all of my adult life except for one 6 month successful stretch wih weight watchers 8 years ago. Nothing I have tried since then, including trying weight watchers again, has worked for me. Now, I need to lose more than 100 pounds which I know will take a lot longer than 30 days but I can't wait to hear about your results. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rustymom Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 I've made some progress the last few years between watching my eating and cardio. My motivation has waivered from time to time, but I'm down from 226 at 5'3" (feb 2010) to 187 currently. I am still obese technically until I get below 170. I can relate to where you are. I started Whole30 in early Aug at 195. I'm done with my 30 days, but I'm sticking pretty close to the program even now. My energy levels, while not really high, are stable. I don't get that sugar high and then drop after eating anymore. The cardio training I did has allowed me to be so much more active. I don't really feel that my weight is holding me back from "regular" life at this point. (It does hold me back from running quickly, etc.) I've dropped the cardio for now and added strength training and walking. It's a nice change so far. For me, Whole30 has allowed me to focus on more veggies, good fat and protein. Dropping the sugar and grains has led to me dropping junk that I would either allow in moderation or occassionally binge on. These are changes that I've needed to make but have never been able to do as the cravings always got me to fold before. Good luck to you as you chip away at your extra weight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jrustdc Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 I am working to become healthier, but weight loss is a big part of that for me, because it impacts my physical and mental health. In the past year and a half, I've made my way down from 210 and size 18 to 170ish, size 14. My BMI might make it to "normal" in the next few months if I can stay the course. A lot of that change happened before discovering Whole30, but Whole30 has really helped me learn more about my mental, physical, and emotional relationships with food, while also getting me back on track with weight loss and improved strength. I'm currently struggling to "ride my own bike" and also work on other aspects of my life that impact my health: stress management and sleep. Check out the Paleo Parents blog, if you haven't already. They don't eat exclusively Whole30, but they have made huge changes in their food and have found benefits in so many aspects of their individual and family life, including significant weight loss - but still being overweight. They've blogged about a lot of the issues you raise and I am always blown away by their honesty and risk taking. Best wishes, and know you have many allies here with similar stories. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carlaccini Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Tracy, So good to see you (and others) posting here! I feel your pain too! I like Jessica have been overweight pretty much all my life. I woke up 4 months ago after having one of the worst migraines of my life (I suffer from monthly migraines that generally last at least 3 days or more) and said "I've had enough of this". Then decided to finally do something about it. Initially I just cut out dairy. Then I dabled in gluten free. Migraines cut in half. I realized I was onto something here. Then by chance someone I know from facebook posted a link to ISWF and I read the intro and then alone I was hooked. I have always truly believed that eating right was the right medication. Except I thought I was! My diet looked almost exactly like the "bad day" in ISWF. I am 5'9", and started the whole 30 weighing 249.4 (that is 6 lbs down from July 1st - I started the whole 30 on Aug 21st) I need to lose like 75 - 80lbs to be deemed healthy. When I began it just seemed like it was an impossible task. Now with this new knowledge it doesn't seem so impossible anymore. Weight loss wasn't my primary goal for starting this, however it was in my top 5 reasons. So best of luck to us all! We can do this!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy R. Posted September 13, 2012 Author Share Posted September 13, 2012 Wonderful post. Wish you every success in getting to where you want to be. Thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy R. Posted September 13, 2012 Author Share Posted September 13, 2012 Congrats on your weight loss! You are doing one thing I'm not, and I should be. Exercising. I have to stop making excuses as to why I don't have time and just do it. I know it's an important part of this get healthy equation. I'm really enjoying learning about proper nutrition and other aspects of living a healthy life. I think back on what I use to believe to be good nutrition and literally just shake my head at how wrong the info was. I walk past those "healthy" freezer meals now and can't believe I use to eat that crap and think I was doing good. Unbelievable! Thank you for the cheers! lol Tracy... No fear in posting weight here. I was 266.6 Lbs (but I am 6'1") and I am also classified as obese. I am on day 20 of my first W30 and I feel your pain. Not too long ago, I was 307 Lbs with poor eating habits and relative inactivity. Now I eat well, I workout regular and I try to accumulate as much knowledge on being fit and holistically healthy. I have been paleo for a while and W30 now. I workout anywhere from 5-8 times a week and I understand the difficulty in making a positive change. Don't let the turkey's get you down. My wife and my kids are real reasons for making positive changes in my life but the primary reason has to be desire to make you healthier. It sounds to me like your head is in the right place. Only with consistent and focused attention can we get to where we need to be! Go Tracy, Go Tracy!!! Cheers DJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy R. Posted September 13, 2012 Author Share Posted September 13, 2012 I love this post Tracy! Thanks for sharing! Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereiam Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Hi Tracy - When you are obese it would be hard for the goal for the W30 *not* to be weight loss. I am in the same boat. I finished my W30 on August 30. When I started on August 1, I weighed 209 and weighed 202 at the end. Since then I have dropped a few more pounds. I started out a year and a half ago at 287. In my before/after picture I was at 287 in the before picture and around 220 in the after picture. My weight loss has slowed down a lot, but I still seem to be losing a couple of pounds a month. My BMI is finally out of the obese category (started at 42) and now I am just "overweight" (BMI = 29). I feel so much better that honestly even if I never lost another pound I would be happy. I am out of plus sized clothing. My sleep apnea is gone. My acid reflux is gone. My snoring is gone. I am not afraid to go to social functions. I can go up and down the stairs easily. I could go on and on. I know that I owe this to the lifestyle change that I have made in eating paleo. I don't see how that can ever change for me. Good luck to you and keep us posted on your weight loss! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy R. Posted September 13, 2012 Author Share Posted September 13, 2012 Tracy, I'm on my 8th day and to read your post is so encouraging. I feel your pain, except, I have been out of shape my entire life. I don't even know what it feels like to be skinny. Sometimes I look at my friends in their cute clothes and just wonder what it must feel like to look like that. I'm not just doing this for weightloss, but it is also a large concern of mine. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism when I was 14. By the time I was 18, it spiraled out of control. My levels have never been normal since then and sometimes I will gain 20 pounds in as short a time period as 2 weeks. This I think is mostly water weight as when it has gotten this bad, I can't even fit my feet into normal shoes. But my thyroid isn't my only reason for gaining weight. I can blame it all that I want, but it really comes down to me and my choices. I may not have a very high metabolism, but eating whatever I want doesn't help that. It's an endless cycle of depression, low self confidence, eating to comfort those feelings, guilt for eating, depression, etc. That's why, for me, or anyone with a thyroid problem(I know you don't have one, just saying), it's important to stay active and to eat right. I have to go back to the doctor in a month for blood tests, I'm pretty sure I'm going to see a lot of improvements. I already have a lot of energy. i no longer suffer from insomnia. I have skinny ankles! (as skinny as they can be), I am not depressed. I don't feel guilt from food. I no longer have heartburn. This is just in 8 days. So, I hope you know you aren't alone. Sometimes I come on here and no offense, but I read a lot of posts from people who seem like they've already been fit for a long time or it's their 2nd or 3rd whole 30. It is comforting to hear from someone who is starting from scratch and I'm glad you had the drive to post for all of us. :-) Good Luck! You can do it! Jessica, I'm glad my post was an encouragement to you. I'm so happy to see there are other's here that can relate to how I feel. I hope we will be a support to one another as we work towards being healthy. My mom has hypothyroidism, so I'm kinda familiar with it. It does make losing harder, but as you are proving, it doesn't mean it's impossible. Doesn't it feel great to know we aren't trapped with no way out of our unfit bodies? I completely get what you are saying about the cycle of depression, low self confidence, eat to feel good, guilt for eating..... I lived that for to many years. What great results you have had and only 8 days in. You'll be skipping to that dr appt in a month. It's great to see I'm not alone...that we all that thought we were alone, are not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracy R. Posted September 13, 2012 Author Share Posted September 13, 2012 Tracy - Thank you for posting your story. I chose W30 with weight loss as my primary goal, and like you I think I was feeling a little out of place because of it. Naturally I would like to be healthier but I also want to be thinner . I am only on Day 3 but I am hoping to see drastic changes. I have been overweight all of my adult life except for one 6 month successful stretch wih weight watchers 8 years ago. Nothing I have tried since then, including trying weight watchers again, has worked for me. Now, I need to lose more than 100 pounds which I know will take a lot longer than 30 days but I can't wait to hear about your results. Hi abaker711, best of luck with your W30. On day 3 of mine, I felt exhausted, just no energy at all. That only lasted a couple days though. So if you are dragging, don't let it get you down. You'll have some pep real soon. I have tried countless weight loss programs also, with bits of success here and there but nothing that was consistent. I know now it was because I was still eating the wrong foods, smaller amounts when counting those points or calories, but still wrong. You mention wanting to see drastic changes. For me, I wanted to see changes, but mostly I went into this wanting to FEEL changes. I had done enough reading on other peoples W30 experience to not get my hopes up about drastic weight loss, cause it just doesn't happen for some people. I guess it depends on how quickly your body starts to heal and gets to that place of being able to shed weight. I really don't know though. I wanted to feel better mostly, cause I figured if I was feeling better then something, don't know what, but something good was happening on the inside and that could only be a good thing for my weight loss in the long run. Now, I did want to lose some this month (and so glad I have at least lost inches, if not pounds), but I didn't want to base the success of my W30 on having lost lots by the end of the month. Cause I know me and that would have been discouraging at the end of the month if I had and then only had dropped a couple pounds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne72 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Great post, Tracy! I recently started my 1st Whole 30 and then stumbled so now I'm on re-start Day 2. Like Jessica, I do feel like a number of the posts I read on here are from people who are already pretty fit and are just looking to take things up a notch. I topped out at 224 ten years ago. I'm 5'4". I used WW to lose 75 lbs that year, but then the weight creeped back on, I had two babies and found myself again hovering over 200 lbs. I did HCG earlier this year and lost 21 lbs in 30 days but then the weight started to come back on and I knew I needed to find a more permanent solution. I have really been trying to reduce my grain intake for the last couple of months, but now I'm on no dairy, no grains, no sugar, no coffee and I feel great. I did have a slight stumble the other day, but it never occurred to me once to give up. More than anything I was just disappointed that I now needed to start over. So I know how you are feeling. I started my Whole 30 on August 22nd at 190 lbs. I did not weigh after my stumble and I do not plan to weigh until I successfully finish this Whole 30, but I just feel lighter - and I don't just mean that in the sense of weight. It's like a fog and a heaviness have been lifted. Thanks again for sharing your story. I look forward to following your progress. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan W Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 You are truly an amazing person. Thank you for posting and welcome! You are among friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 You are truly an amazing person. That's the only kind of judgement you're getting from us Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica P Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 With the exception of Foster children, your post could be mine! Two years ago, my husband would get up in the morning and grumble about his gut and how he was going on a diet and needed to lose weight. I inwardly groaned as I knew he would be thinking weight watchers. He wasn't ever saying I should do it, or I need to lose weight, just him. But I knew I needed to do so, but just couldn't get excited by it....It being weight watchers. I wanted to lose weight but I really wasn't excited about the recipes/food/plan on weight watchers. So move forward a few months and I can no longer fit in my pregnancy clothes as I had gained too much weight. I got up on morning and couldn't fit in my "Fat" jeans. That did it for me! I was not buying any more "fat" clothes! My daily life to that point: Wake up, dress daughter, feed daughter and take daughter to day care (unless husband did all these). Go to desk and work in front of PC. If my husband wasn't home, get lunch--usually out. If husband is home, don't move from desk, eat what he makes me at my desk. Pick up daughter from daycare, Have dinner. put daughter to bed, go to bed (to watch TV or read). My total extent of exercise was the one trip down the stairs in the morning and the one trip up at night. On said morning, I thought that over in my mind and said to myself, this just isn't me. I used to be so active. I weighed 222 lbs and am 5'4" I immediately went and did what I said I wasn't going to do: Find a personal trainer on craig's list! (more paranoia on my side!). I absolutely lucked out there. I started working out 3 times/week. He suggested eating real food. I have lost 70lbs and if you count the ones I've had to lose multiple times, I've probably lost 100! I feel like I can eat this way forever. AND THERE IS THE DIFFERENCE FOR ME!!!! I love the way I eat. I'm not sure if it's where I am in my life right now or what that caused me to not have hysterics over no more pasta or bread and even higher hysterics over eating veggies (Never really liked them) but something just clicked. If I have a treat meal or treat weekend or vacation, I no longer beat myself up or say "eh, it's over, I cheated. or I ate poorly. Might as well give up". I just pick up where I left off. In returning from vacation and a boatload of Guinness and chocolate, I was actually looking forward to eating paleo again and starting the W30! Never happened before. Am I doing W30 for weight loss? Yep. I have to be honest. I know it's not the goal of the program. But hey, I'm giving up WINE! But I'm also trying to see if it's the dairy or the wine that keeps giving me potty issues. (minor ones but still). And yes, I darn well needed to detox after vacation. We all can do this. It's great to see everyone on here doing so well. As we lose our dependence on food for whatever reason we have it, it becomes sooooo much easier to say, eh, I'm not really hungry for that. Don't pressure yourself. The weight will come off. I've been frustrated this year because it's been slow. But one thing I keep telling myself is that I want to lose it as I live...i.e. I don't want to super-restrict or super-exercise to lose it as I won't be able to keep that up. I want something that I can do. GOOD LUCK! You CAN do it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lola Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 Wow, I love this. What a moving thread... thanks for sharing, everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gfresh73 Posted September 13, 2012 Share Posted September 13, 2012 So glad that you posted this. Keep on keeping on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan W Posted September 14, 2012 Share Posted September 14, 2012 That's the only kind of judgement you're getting from us Absolutely! I love this forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sharon Simpson Thumann Posted September 14, 2012 Share Posted September 14, 2012 Both my husband and I are over weight. I weight around 268 and he is over 300. We start the Whole30 this coming Sunday. You are not alone, as you can see from all the other posts. I chose Whole30 because I need to regain a healthy relationship with food and because of the positive encouragement from members/moderators of this forum. I spent a week reading the forums alone before buying the book. I want to lose weight, but forming a healthy relationship with foods is the main goal for me at the moment. Good luck to you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lola Posted September 14, 2012 Share Posted September 14, 2012 Both my husband and I are over weight. I weight around 268 and he is over 300. We start the Whole30 this coming Sunday. You are not alone, as you can see from all the other posts. I chose Whole30 because I need to regain a healthy relationship with food and because of the positive encouragement from members/moderators of this forum. I spent a week reading the forums alone before buying the book. I want to lose weight, but forming a healthy relationship with foods is the main goal for me at the moment. Good luck to you! And good luck to you too Sharon! What a great attitude, and out look. I have no doubt that you and your husband will rock the W30! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mich Posted September 14, 2012 Share Posted September 14, 2012 Hi Tracy, thanks for posting such a heartfelt message. I am in a similar position to you, I'm not sure how much I weigh as I gave up the scales over a year ago. I am a size 22 in pants at the moment although they are starting to get loose which is fab. I lost about 100 kilo's a few years ago and have put a big chunk of that back on (although not nearly as much as I lost). I struggled for ages to try and control my eating but slowly started losing the battle. Whole30 has put me back in the driving seat rather than food driving my moods (usually negative). Weight loss is also a goal for me although I am happy to eat according to Meal Map and let it come off in it's own course rather than put all the stress and negative energy into it which is what I would have done with other diets where I felt I was being deprived. A lot of people have said what great willpower I have but I don't think it's willpower I think that eating well has so many benefits that it is just easy. I'm even enjoying all the cooking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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