Totally off track and I feel so out of control

[reneeruecks]

I know there are a lot of similar posts but I just need to post this and really ask for everyone's help and support!

 

I did an amazing whole30 min oct-mid nov.  I was so proud, I stayed 100% compliant on THANKSGIVING! I didn't even have too but I Wanted too! 

 

But slowly all the picking, gluten, dairy  and sugar are starting to sneak back into my life. I'm feeling anxious, out of control, totally disappointed with myself and a complete failure. I'm starting to obsess with food again, and I'm so worried I will gain back the 8lbs I lost 

 

I just don't know how to do this with adaptions. I think I can eat dairy and gluten in small amounts. But I don't really have breaks with these foods and I am finding If I have them I tend to eat more and want to eat more frequently throughout the day.  Can you still be in fat burning mode if you eat these? I also do get gassy after eating them but I can tolerate it, I guess. 

 

I feel like if I don't have strict rules to follow I'm all over the place and out of control. I want to end this so bad. I just want to be healthy and happy and loose weight. I just can't get in the right mind set  since i'm not on the whole 30 strictly. 

 

I just don't know what is right for me. Or how to even create my own personal plan : (

[praxisproject]

First off, relax, take a breath. You worked really hard for your Whole30 and you did it!  ​

 

Anxious can be a side effect for some people from gluten, but you also sound pretty stressed.

 

Learning is never a failure, you are learning things about yourself, your relationship with food and also learning to listen to your body.

Don't worry about the weight right now, think about how you feel.

 

Did you do the Reintroduction phase?

Are you keeping a food diary?

Are you eating enough?

Do you find there's certain things that you're struggling with in particular, post W30?

[thegoldengrahamgirl]

I know there are a lot of similar posts but I just need to post this and really ask for everyone's help and support!

 

I did an amazing whole30 min oct-mid nov.  I was so proud, I stayed 100% compliant on THANKSGIVING! I didn't even have too but I Wanted too! 

 

But slowly all the picking, gluten, dairy  and sugar are starting to sneak back into my life. I'm feeling anxious, out of control, totally disappointed with myself and a complete failure. I'm starting to obsess with food again, and I'm so worried I will gain back the 8lbs I lost 

 

I just don't know how to do this with adaptions. I think I can eat dairy and gluten in small amounts. But I don't really have breaks with these foods and I am finding If I have them I tend to eat more and want to eat more frequently throughout the day.  Can you still be in fat burning mode if you eat these? I also do get gassy after eating them but I can tolerate it, I guess. 

 

I feel like if I don't have strict rules to follow I'm all over the place and out of control. I want to end this so bad. I just want to be healthy and happy and loose weight. I just can't get in the right mind set  since i'm not on the whole 30 strictly. 

 

I just don't know what is right for me. Or how to even create my own personal plan : (

I think you actually answered your own question - you CAN'T eat dairy and gluten in small amounts.  You DO know what is right for you. So why not make your personal "rule" NO dairy and NO gluten?  That's the beginning of your personal plan.

 

Once you stop the anxiety around those foods and/or from consuming those foods, you might suddenly realize that you CAN trust yourself to make good decisions.  You might consider doing a Whole3 or a Whole5 or Whole7 - however long it takes to calm down and start feeling good again.  Then, you can reintroduce foods one at a time and take notes as to how they effect you, and whether it's worth it.  That's the beginning of your personal plan!

 

Remember, 1 day (or even jus tone meal) of Whole30-compliant eating is always available to you as "home base."

 

Cheers,

 

-Lauren (GGG)

[Brewer5]

^ Agreed.

 

Anything that makes you feel out of control is not a food you tolerate well.   Feel free to mourn... roll around on the floor, scream at the skies and say "Why me?!"...

 

But when you are done with all of that, the truth will still be the same.  Food without brakes is food without brakes.  Make the choice to be in control, and avoid those things -- day, after day, after day.

 

Control or be controlled.  It really is that simple.

[Alisonlcarver]

It is so easy to get into the "what the hell" mindset, where you eat something 'bad' or off-plan, get discouraged, start to feel bad about yourself, and then all of a sudden you are a failure at everything going on in your life, and when will this shame spiral end?!

 

I've been there.  And not just once.

 

Like praxisproject said, relax, stop, and breathe.  Your cortisol is through the roof, and unless you like to live yourself in a frenzied, frantic state of mind, nothing good will come from too much stress and cortisol. 

 

Go back to basics.  It's so easy to go down the rabbit hole, thinking how much and how often should I eat.  While those things are important, sometimes (especially when you are feeling stressed and frenzied and about to grab the nearest box of donuts and do a faceplant) you just need to go back to basics.  Eat the foods that make you feel good and allow you to be in control of what you eat.  Protein, vegetables, fat, some fruit (unless your sugar dragon is raging), and some nuts (unless you have a problem with nuts).  That's it.  Basic.  Just eat Whole, Real, Food.

 

One of the things that I love about the Whole 30 is that it takes the brainwork out of picking our foods.  We eat protein, veggies, and fat 3 times a day to satiety.  These foods fill us up just the right amount and provide sustained nutrition and energy levels until the next meal.  These foods make us feel good physically and psychologically.  They give us consistent blood sugar levels without the roller coaster effect of having to eat every 2-3 hours or else slapping somebody.  They make us feel in control, and eating these foods really does allow us to choose the foods that we eat (not the other way around.)  Get back to basics for as long as it takes you to feel in control and good again.

 

 

One of the other things that I absolutely adore about the Whole 30 is that it allows us to focus on our non-scale victories.  Think back to your Whole 30.  What was your motivation for taking on such an endeavor?  Write down all of the things that you remember improved in your health and your life...not just losing 8 pounds.  That is great but there's so much more!  During your Whole 30 how was your sleep?  How were your energy levels?  Were you kinder and happier in general?  Did you feel in control of your food choices?  Were you able to bypass the dessert table with ease?  Did you gain self-awareness?  Did you focus on other aspects of your improving health besides weight loss?  Think of those things.  Write them down.  Post them--to your fridge or cabinet.  Read them often.  Remember how amazing you feel eating the Whole 30 way. 

 

And also remember that no one is perfect.  You are not perfect, so do not demand perfection of yourself.  Like the Hartwig's say, it's not meant to be a Whole 365.  You will find your way, through trial and error.  And I have no doubt that you will slip and stumble.  But please please don't let those slips and stumbles turn into a downward shame spiral where you get frantic, stressed, and think you are going to completely mess up your amazing progress.  In those moments, relax, stop, breathe, and come up with a plan.  Do you get back to Whole 30 until you are feeling good again, or do you brush it off as a splurge and then get right back to your Whole Renee?  Whatever you do, just know that taking action to improve yourself is better than continuing with destructive behaviors or actions.  You can do this.  You will do this.  Good luck.

[reneeruecks]

Thank you so much.  I realized today that I really can't just eat dairy, sugar and gluten, or at least in the amounts I have been consuming.  I have been feeling foggy, tired, sick, gassy and have had headaches. I have also been drinking more so I have been blaming my symptoms on that but I really think it's the food as well. The other big thing is I DO NOT TRUST MYSELF, and that is because I have been taught my whole life not too. I know that I know what is good for my body but for some reason I am choosing to completely ignore my body screaming and begging me not to do what I'm doing but I am still doing it anyway. 

 

I guess I am really just trying to figure out how to make this my new life continuously.  Maybe starting right in the middle of the holiday season was a bad idea bc there are so many parties and once a year temptations.  I don't know.  I am back on today %100 bc I really miss the way I felt during my whole30. 

 

Weight is another big goal for me.  I am 5/4 and I weigh 198.  It is imperative to my health and mental state that I loose more weight but I refuse to do that via dieting EVER AGAIN. 

 

Thank you so much for bringing me back down to earth. I'm sure I will be posting a ton more as I continue figure this out!

[praxisproject]

Keeping a food diary helps, not just the food, but how you feel. Sometimes we're not eating enough, or we eat more or less of one thing over another and it has noticeable impacts on how we feel.

 

I discovered after much trial and error (and tests!), doctors and lastly a research scientist that not only don't I tolerate gluten, but I'm now classed as a "probable celiac" (can't complete the "gluten challenge" test - have since learned many celiacs can't but they have no alternate test for us... yet), which comes with strict requirements not to eat gluten, as it damages my internal organs (no wonder I felt so crappy all the time!). Dairy issues often goes hand in hand with celiac too. Something I noticed after quite some time without gluten is that grain based alcohols also make me extra sick (whiskey, etc). The feeling I always thought of as "hangover" is actually only for alcohol from grains. Gluten free cider (not W30 compliant), no such reaction.

 

The best present for the holidays is feeling well, so you can relax and enjoy time with loved ones If you don't know if the food will be safe, take your own plate (or two - one to share). Loved ones will understand you don't want to be sick for the holidays.