megbeveridge

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Everything posted by megbeveridge

  1. I started my very first Whole30 on January 1st, 2019 as a reset for my body. I wanted to lose weight, ditch sugar, and feel good about my diet. Completing the program has taught me that and so much more. I think self esteem is something we all (especially women) struggle with, but eating disorders are a whole different animal. I was lucky enough to have a mother who knew all the signs and caught me before I even started. She'd had a bulimic roommate in college and didn't want the same for me. There isn't a time in my life that I can remember being happy with my body. I see pictures of myself as a teenager and even though I was 120 pounds soaking wet, I can still pick out things I don't like. For a long time, when I was out from under my parents roof, I adopted an external devil-may-care attitude towards food. The reality was, I couldn't stop eating and I couldn't stop hating my body. I ate in secret, I hid wrappers, I went back for seconds and thirds of dessert, and I shamed myself. This was indicative of the early stages of a binge eating disorder. I knew that in order to get control over myself, I'd have to do something very prescriptive and strict. On an eating program that tells you to "limit" high-sugar, rich foods, I make every excuse for why it doesn't really matter if I eat it. Unless I'm told "no" I'm going to do what I want; I succumb to the disordered thinking. Whole30 has taught me how to eat and be full, live without added sugars, and take care of my body. If I give love to my body, it will do the same for me. We're a team, not rivals. At 25 years old I should and can be the happiest, healthiest version of myself yet! Here's to getting stronger and healthier and spreading more love!
  2. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Ugh, I really need to recommit. I feel like every other day there's a new "reason" to eat unhealthy food. One day I'm at a site for work, one day I meet my parents for dinner, one day I have an outing with friends, etc. I keep thinking, "oh this is just a special occasion, I'll do better tomorrow." My logical brain has been having a cow lately, scolding me for being so weak-willed. I knew I'd go down this landslide after Whole30 ended, I just was hoping that knowing my problem would help me fight it. Apparently not.As far as my current SMART goal goes, I'm totally failing. Yesterday I had a sandwich for lunch and pizza with dinner. Wednesday we had a snow and ice storm and I didn't much care what I ate. Today I've done okay, but that's really because I haven't eaten much. I don't know if it's the guilt keeping me back or if I'm really not hungry. I suppose I'll just eat a big dinner if I can.Exercise has been tricky this week. Monday I climbed and I planned to go back Wednesday, but the gym closed due to weather. This morning I made it a point to get in the office by 8 for the yoga practice. It felt great! I'd really like to climb tonight, but I feel bad for my dogs. It's just me this weekend and they're not going to see much of me as it is. I might just do a yoga practice in the morning so I feel like I've done something.Tomorrow I have a get-together for a friend's birthday. I'm in charge of making a cake, which is my specialty. We have a reservation for a restaurant I've never been to for lunch and I'm not sure what we're doing for dinner. It's definitely going to be hard to resist over-eating and drowning in sugar. Wish me luck!
  3. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Help! The blizzard has come! I'm stuck in the office while the rest of the city is warm and snug at home. Officially, we're closed, but that only happened 20 minutes after I got in. Yesterday's lunch was the tuna salad on toast and fruit that I had packed. Dinner was butter masala chicken curry as planned. I did pretty well sticking to my meal plan! Unfortunately the chocolate bug got to me after dinner. Considering that was my only splurge, I feel okay about it. I went into today with a plan, but the weather threw me for a loop. Wednesdays usually mean bagels at my office. I had a yogurt at the house before I left, intending to have half a bagel when I got in, but alas, no one brought them. We have about 10% of the office here, so I suppose it wasn't worth it, but those of us who are here were counting on it. Out of frustration and convenience I turned to hot chocolate and some mini Milkyway bars to fill me up. Hopefully the rest of the day goes better.
  4. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Yesterday I went home for lunch, put the steak on a skillet, and totally forgot to make anything else to go with it lol. I was so busy tending to my crock pot and dogs that it didn't occur to me that I should start on some veggies or anything. So, yesterday's lunch was 100% carnivorous, something I never thought I would say. I could have eaten my apple when I got back to work, but I actually wasn't hungry again until it was time to leave. I guess that's what protein and fats will do! Dinner was the crockpot meatballs and sauce over zoodles. My main man made a side of roasted broccoli as well. Meals like that make me forget about non-compliant foods! This morning I had a Chobani Lower Sugar yogurt and a Purely Elizabeth grain-free granola bar. I love those bars so much! They basically taste like a cookie, but they're actually low sugar (6g) and have a little protein to balance it. Fingers crossed it holds me until lunch. For that I packed a slice of 15-grain bread (gettin them whole grains, woot!), a small mason jar with tuna salad (W30 mayo), and some fruit in case I need more food by the end of the day. I've been really bad at bringing veggies to work, it's definitely something I need to get back to. Dinner is going to be butter chicken curry with potatoes, peppers, and onions. It's been a while since I had Indian style food and I'm excited! Smart Goal: My grain of the day is whole grain bread with my lunch. I have one loaf of this bread that I keep in the freezer and take out one slice at a time. That way I'm not rushed to eat it before it goes stale or moldy. I was successful in eating only one grain yesterday, so I'm on the right track. My weakness right now isn't grains, it's chocolate. Yesterday I went on a bit of a chocolate spree after climbing, but still managed to be only 1g of sugar over my allowance. Not too bad! Today I'm keeping away from milk chocolate and those sneaky caramel m&ms and substituting some dark chocolate when I really want it. I know the point of Whole30 is not to have cravings, but I'm human and it was just Valentine's Day. In the US at least, that means lots of chocolate around!
  5. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Thank you! I really need something like this to keep me honest and on track. I'm glad it helps someone else too!
  6. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    I have to confess that when I made this SMART Goal I completely forgot about my Friday and Saturday plans. I'm starting over today because I had pizza on Friday night and went to a winery Saturday where we had wine, cheese, crackers, and bread. Yesterday was just a fail all around. Although my food decisions were pretty terrible this weekend, I did get to work out three times! I was shocked that I had the energy for it, but I think my new Food Freedom is really helping. Friday I did yoga in the morning and climbing followed by a cool down workout after dinner. Saturday morning I did more climbing. This week I'm determined to keep my meals simple and mostly whole foods. I'm allowing one source of grain per day because whole grains are filling and the extra carbs help for exercise. Yogurts are the only dairy I'm planning to eat with any regularity. Last night I started the week with half a steak, green beans, and a bun. I had some grapes at the end of dinner, but didn't eat after that. This morning was my favorite cereal (low sugar, whole grain, and delicious!) with almond milk. I intended to have a sausage with it, but ran out of time. I prepped turkey meatballs and tomato sauce before heading to work. For lunch I'm going home and having the other half of that steak warmed on a skillet, veggies, and lots of water! Dinner is the turkey meatballs and zoodles. I planned the whole week on my meal planning board and I think I can sustain mostly Whole30 foods. When grocery shopping I didn't worry too much about added sugars or dairy. It definitely reduced the cost of my trip. This is the first time since December that my groceries cost less than $60/person for the week. Instead it was about $54 each. Smart Goal: This week each of my days are planned so that one meal can have a source of grain. Today that was breakfast cereal. I'm still keeping my sugar down and aiming for mainly whole grains, but not being overly strict about it. I don't have any "special" days until Saturday and I think even then I'll be able to stick with it. My friends are generally quite supportive and I think will be shocked at how good I look! My one grain for Saturday may be in the form of cake if the birthday girl wants me to make one
  7. megbeveridge

    SchrodingersCat doing the thing diary!

    CONGRATS!! 20 pounds and no urge to eat non-compliant foods is a super big deal! You are amazing! Do you think the remaining dry/red skin could be a water thing? Otherwise it's probably just genetic and you'll need to keep treating it :/ I think the only real up-side to reintroducing is the cheaper groceries. Not having to buy the simplest, most whole foods is much less expensive. All the meats that have no added sugar are marked up. I don't have to buy a gazillion eggs. I can eat less meat, which is an expense in itself, but still stay full. For me, the increase in fresh produce was also costly since it's winter here and everything is out of season. If your budget allows you to continue Whole30, definitely go for it! But if not, don't worry too much about the little things. Like you said, a little sugar in a marinade isn't going to be a huge deal in the long run. Congratulations again! I'm so happy for you!!
  8. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    So I totally had more chocolate than I needed yesterday, but still less than I would have in past years. I call that a success. Dinner was amazing! If I ever wrote a book about my first Whole30 it would be called From Tofu to Steak: A Vegetarian Tries Whole30. I'm feeling a little guilty about eating animals still, but I remind myself that in the spring I'll have more money to spend on responsibly sourced meat and I can support local farmers. Voting with your dollars is more effective than abstaining completely. For breakfast I had tuna salad made with W30 mayo on a slice of whole grain 7-grain toast. I'm not sure what my lunch will be, but since I've had grains already it won't be that! I had a few m&ms before I left the house this morning, but overall I've been great about sugar today. Despite the sugar overload yesterday, I am awake, alert, and focused today. I think starting on ADHD medication is really doing me some good. It may also keep my appetite down so I can focus less on getting food into my face and more on making sure what I eat is nourishing and gives me energy. I've already had about 32 ounces of water today and I'm dying for more, which will also keep my appetite from growing. Smart Goal: Yesterday I was obviously more focused on chocolate than carbs from grains, but I did have some grains with dinner and a bit for dessert. We made some mushroom and green bean risotto, but I didn't love it so I only ate a few bites. A little while later I also ate a couple bites of cake, but wasn't too into that either. Overall it was probably less than a serving. Today I already had whole grain bread so I'm done for the day. Tomorrow is a friend's birthday celebration so I'm baking a cake. Hopefully I can keep myself to a small piece and not dive in head first!
  9. megbeveridge

    SchrodingersCat doing the thing diary!

    The time difference between us is wild! It's 10:00 here on Friday and I'm at work! You're dinner sounds so good. I can't get into cauli rice, but I think with that combination it would be divine.
  10. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    New SMART Goal: S: I will only eat up to one serving of grains per day. M: One serving can be measured by grain type. A: It can be achieved by planning meals ahead and choosing other options when eating out. R: I found through reintroduction that grains make me feel overfull and slow. I want to improve my energy. T: I will do this for the next seven days. Happy Valentine's Day! The holiday has gotten to me. I've had several chocolates already and I'm sure my boyfriend will have more for me when I get home. I'm not too worried about it because the next holiday is Easter. Definitely enough time to recover and make more progress. Yesterday's lunch included a single slice of cheddar cheese. I though I'd be safe since it was such a small quantity. I was wrong! I was feeling the effects throughout the afternoon and evening. I really need to accept that dairy just isn't going to work for me. Tonight we'll be having a nice T-bone steak dinner. Bones will go to the dogs as their V-Day treat. Other than that we plan to have a relaxing evening and go to bed early. Maybe with an early bed time I won't be tempted to have dessert! A girl can dream right?
  11. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Happy hump day! It's a downhill coast from here right? I might make it to the weekend unscathed. That is, if Valentine's Day doesn't get me! The dinner I had last night was definitely what I needed. I could have done with some more flavor, but it was perfect for my body. I'm starting to work back towards a Whole30-esque diet while working in some beneficial foods that are not compliant. After dinner was bouldering! I completed my first V3 problem (I had been doing V2 level, so this is a step up) which was awesome! I didn't get to a point where I felt too tired to keep going. I wish I had though because it almost felt like not enough of a workout. Next time I might be able to stay longer! Breakfast was yogurt and an apple chicken sausage. I think the yogurt is helping my biome a lot. It's also a lower sugar option so rather than being super sweet, it still has the tangy taste that keeps it from being dessert-like. The apple chicken sausages are something I started eating during Whole30 and realized I actually really enjoy! I'm generally not a huge sausage fan, but these are perfect for breakfast and not full of questionable ingredients like "traditional" breakfast sausage. Going from vegetarian to having meat for breakfast is kind of wild! Lunch was catered by a product rep who was supposed to do a talk for us today and canceled. I had half a roast beef sandwich and made it open-faced so I wouldn't be filling myself with empty carbs. That also helped to reduce the amount of spread I'd be eating, especially important since I had no idea what was in it. This came with a small side salad, a cup of fruit, and a cookie. I'd like to say I didn't touch the cookie, but alas I cannot. After looking into the nutrition information I decided to have 1/4 of it. I don't think I've ever eaten only 1/4 of a cookie. Who am I??? Overall I'm happy with my choices. SMART Goal: Yesterday I just slid in under my sugar goal! I got a little snacky after climbing, so I definitely could have gone over if I wasn't careful. Today I'm still under so far even after that 1/4 of a cookie. Luckily dinner won't have much sugar and I won't be climbing tonight so I shouldn't be getting hungry again later. With any luck today will be a success! This is day 7 of my SMART goal so tomorrow will be time to make a new one. Even though I'm creating another goal, I need to remember to hold onto what this one has taught me. Sugar is not in control of me. I don't need super sweet foods every day. Special occasions are okay as long as I am willing to face the gastric consequences and low energy the next day. Most of all I just need to be conscious of what I'm eating. Is it fueling me or filling me?
  12. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Last night was my early Valentine's Day dinner and a cheat treat meal for sure! I had some amazing macadamia chicken, a little of the mashed potatoes, half my broccoli and (most importantly) half a slice of carrot cake. YUM! Of course this was a huge meal, even when I ate only half of it. I didn't feel too terrible afterwards, but as the night went on I did have some stomach bloating and discomfort. Overall it worked out just fine. Today I feel a little off and a little bloated. I still have leftovers so that'll be my lunch today, minus the cake. The mashed potatoes weren't great so I probably won't have much of those. Dinner will be a sheet pan meal with chicken and LOTS of veggies. I'll be waiting a few days to eat the other half of that cake slice! I'm finding I definitely don't feel as well as I did last week. I definitely need to get my meals closer to a Whole30 recommended plate. On Friday I looked at why I'm straying from the reintro process, now I need to work on coming back to it. Hopefully the dinner tonight will be a good kickstart and I'll be able to work from there, but I think another reason it's so hard is because my partner isn't doing it. He just went ahead and started eating what he wanted so he keeps suggesting meals that are non-compliant. I don't want to say no all the time. Smart Goal: I definitely was not under my sugar goal last night, but that's okay because I knew I'd have a special occasion night. I'm back on track today with 22g of sugar left after lunch. A treat once in a while is okay, but I know that sugar shouldn't be a daily indulgence. I don't feel as well after all the cake I had last night and the food I ate in general just wasn't as good as whole, fresh food. I'm glad I had the experience!
  13. Hey all! Since the moderators suggested we move our reintro conversation to the Life After section, I figured I'd start it up! Post your successes, your insights, your question, whatever! (GO US!)
  14. megbeveridge

    "Who's starting 1/1?" Reintro Group

    I'm curious as someone on anxiety and depression meds myself, how did you know you were ready to step it down? I feel like I have my symptoms really well controlled right now, but I'm afraid I'll get worse if I reduce my dosage. I didn't feel this good until the last day or two of Whole30, but since then I've continued to feel great. Reintroduction has actually made me feel even better since I'm not so worried about messing up all the time! It's just difficult to gauge where my brain is vs where my body is.
  15. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Friday night I tried to make that steak I've had in the fridge, but somebody left it marinating in a very vinegary solution for several days and it was practically inedible. He was very sorry. We went to a restaurant instead and I had some delicious tacos, elote, and pesto rice. I had no reaction from any of the food! Yay! Climbing had to wait since the dogs were alone so long. Saturday I did really well with food and I did a lot of cleaning! We went climbing in the morning (I'm still sore) and then went grocery shopping and cleaned the rest of the day. I was definitely tired by the time I went to bed. Despite the exhaustion, my brain just wouldn't stop talking and woke me up at 2:30am. Annoying. Friday night was the same except I was awake at 3am. Lack of sleep is not helping my health! Part of that high energy, exhaustion, not sleeping cycle is that I was just given a preliminary diagnosis of ADHD. It's not official because I haven't gone through the full examination, but my therapist is pretty certain. I'm just going and going and going lately. In the past it's been covered up well with my depression and anxiety. Now those are much more controlled and I'm still on a focus roller-coaster. Either I'm all in or I'm somewhere in lala land. Right now, my brain is hyperfocused on the idea of ADHD and what that means for me. Ugh! Sunday MFP decided to not work for me at all. My app wasn't communicating with the server or something? I just gave up eventually. I have no idea how my SMART goal was yesterday, but there's nothing I can do about it. I've been doing well today with a breakfast of steel cut oats with frozen strawberries and raspberries and a lunch of chicken meatloaf and skin-in mashed potatoes. I'm on track with my goal and hopefully it'll stay that way! Smart Goal: I was just under my sugar goal for Friday, which was really good for having a last-minute dinner out. Saturday I was under my goal again! Sunday I'm not sure about because of the tech malfunction. Today is starting well with only some low-sugar berries in my breakfast!
  16. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    SMART Goal progress: Yesterday I was under my sugar goal by 4g. Instead of eating and then logging it into MFP (this is how I'm keeping myself on track during reintro), I logged everything first and determined whether I could eat it based on the sugar content. Yesterday I just wasn't hungry when lunch time came around so I had a mini meal instead of my full lunch. Dinner was chicken burgers (no bun) with mustard and sauteed vegetables. The mustard was not W30 compliant as it had added sugar, but I'm not being super strict about added sugars during reintroduction besides keeping up with my SMART goal. Breakfast today was smoked turkey breast with mustard wrapped in a corn tortilla. I've determined that I don't have a reaction to corn, but I'll still keep that as my only reintro today. I definitely haven't been very strict with my reintro and @MamaJ posted something that reminded me to question why. I think because I had a really rough time with how I felt during Whole30, coupled with it being my first time, I am less determined to stay Whole30 between reintro days. I had so many digestive problems, headaches, and trouble sleeping during the program that it's hard for me to think it's worth it. I really want to do better, but I'm lacking the "feel good" motivation. Maybe I'm just embracing food freedom?
  17. I've been pretty off track with my reintro too. I think my "why"s are that it's my first time doing it and my Whole30 was really rough. Like you said, not an excuse, but I think if I'd felt better during the process I would be better at sticking to my reintroduction plan. That said, I think I'm feeling much better by adding the little bit of non-compliant food that I eat, but not going overboard. Hopefully you'll feel better today after the non-compliant food settles a little!
  18. megbeveridge

    SchrodingersCat doing the thing diary!

    Ah I forgot about that. 9 days isn't bad either! May the tiger blood be with you!
  19. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    NSV: I am wearing my favorite dress and it is loose! Woohoo! Instead of steak, dinner last night was chicken soup with rice noodles, but I really didn't even need the noodles. I got way too full too fast. Next time I'll be doing zoodles or just soup. Breakfast today was some turkey breast lunch meat, mango pieces, and a half-caf coffee with nutpods creamer. I was definitely tempted to have some cheese with that turkey, but I held off so I didn't have to start the day bloated. Lunch is chicken breast, sweet potatoes, an apple, and some nuts. I've managed to keep away from the donuts in the kitchen both yesterday and today (it's just the rejects now) so I'm pretty proud of myself. As I'm sure I've said before, a non-strict diet doesn't work for me. I will find excuses to eat what I want when I want if it's just me saying "I shouldn't" instead of "I will not." SMART goals are a thing for a reason and Whole30 meets all the requirements. Being in the post-Whole30 stage I'm really scared of backsliding all the way into my old habits. I think I'll need to make a new goal each week from here on out. A Thursday is as good as any day to start! S: I will stay under my sugar goal every day. M: My sugar goal is 45g. A: It can be achieved by keeping added sugars to a minimum and recording how many grams of sugar each item has. R: Being aware of the amount of sugar in my foods will help me to have a healthier lifestyle. T: I will do this for the next seven days.
  20. megbeveridge

    SchrodingersCat doing the thing diary!

    You're just a week out! Hurrah! Your meals always sound so good. I'm jealous of your culinary skills
  21. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    Yesterday was a good food day! I had some gluten free bread which had no ill effect. That was paired with egg, avocado, and bacon for breakfast and tuna salad for lunch (with homemade mayo!). Dinner was fish, zoodles, and Whole30 pasta sauce. I finally slept well and got up right with my alarm this morning. Today is off to a good start with a breakfast of sweet potato home fries, bacon, and an apple. I've got another slice of gf bread and tuna salad for lunch, which I'm very much looking forward to! I may start buying some whole wheat bread when I'm through this loaf. If I get the expensive kind I won't eat a lot of it at once and I just really like bread. I'll keep it in the freezer and thaw one slice at a time so I'm not tempted to eat it all at once to keep it from going stale or moldy. Tonight we should be going bouldering! Yayyy! I got back on the wall with top-roping on Monday and I'm so excited to boulder again. My hands are definitely not feeling it, but I do have good energy. We'll be having a steak dinner to fuel up!
  22. megbeveridge

    Day 31 - still in review mode

    I've introduced dairy, grains, and sugar so far. Dairy was terrible, grains seemed to have little effect besides feeling overly full, and sugar is a demon. I second @SchrodingersCat with the market outing! It'll be so fun to go to new and different markets!
  23. megbeveridge

    Day 31 - still in review mode

    It's so much harder to be on your own! My bf isn't taking reintroduction very seriously and doesn't seem to understand why I am. He keeps just eating whatever he wants and it's driving me nuts because I want to do it right! It was easier when we were on the same page.
  24. megbeveridge

    SchrodingersCat doing the thing diary!

    I'm allergic to non-allergenic makeup and face cleansing wipes! I don't know what it is, but it makes my face go red, hot, and puffy! Actually most cleansers that aren't all natural do that to my face. It's so hard to find something that actually works for my skin and doesn't turn me into a burning tomato head. I had a couple of days in the past month where something on my scarves made me break out in hives. There was no sign of anything on them, no smell, no stains, but I was covered head to toe in hives after wearing them for 30 minutes.
  25. megbeveridge

    My first Whole30: done and dusted!

    I'm back! I took a long weekend and I only post from a desktop computer so I've been out a few days. The weekend was good! I had some dark chocolate on Saturday with no ill effect. I was amazed at my ability to limit myself to two bite-sized pieces. Sunday I definitely calorie splurged when reintroducing grains! I had some incredible French toast for breakfast that I enjoyed to the fullest. My stomach, however, wasn't pleased. I felt overly full and kind of nauseous. I didn't have any noticeable effects from the grains or sugar, but I did realize that I can't eat large portions of carbs like I used to. Monday was almost entirely Whole30 except for rice with dinner. No effect there either other than being stuffed. Monday to today I started noticing acne on my face and it's not a particularly hormonal time of the month for me. I can reasonably say this is probably from the sugar and carb intake. I'm definitely going to be cutting those back to Whole30 levels again!