heb2014

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  1. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Day 28 and I’m feeling great.
    5:55 got up changed baby, went back to bed
     
    9:30 baby alarm went off again.  It was nice to sleep in a little.  Now to get the day going.
    I made the boys oatmeal for breakfast, and had to be mindful not to taste it to test hotness while I was feeding the baby. 
    10:00 M1: Pederson sausage links and a mixed green salad with the “chick-fil-a” dipping sauce as a dressing.  
    I intended to make an egg, but ended up being satisfied with the sausage.  Getting work done = baby destroying most of the house
    4:00 M2: venison sheet pan fajitas.  With avocado, tomatoes in lettuce leaf wraps.  
    These were delicious and the boys helped me make them this time which was a nice surprise.  I enjoy cooking with them and watching them develop their kitchen skills.
    After we cleaned up I decided to make another mess.  My hubby has been having a frustrating day and nothing has seem to go his way.  So I decided to make his favorite (mine too) no bake chocolate peanut butter oatmeal cookie.  Talk about being mindful!  I had to really pay attention to not lick the fingertips or clean off the peanut butter spoon with my tongue.  I tossed a towel over my shoulder like I used to do in my commercial kitchen days so that my hand went up to the towel to wipe off rather than my mouth.  They turned out beautifully.  I hope they make him smile when he comes home, he could use a smile today!  I think I’ll go make him a “would you be my valentine card” to put with them.  It’s never to early to ask right?
    My 11 yr DS saw the cookies and asked in an overly excited tone, “does this mean you are done with your diet?”  To which I answered no.  He then proceeded to drill me, did you eat any? Did you taste it? Did you lick the spoon? All were answered with No.  He then gave me a huge hug and said “Mom, I’m so proud of you!”  
    My hubby did indeed smile when he saw the cookies and also asked if this means the diet thing is over.  I told him no it means I love you.  He even liked my card I made.  After sending the kids to bed we spent our evening snuggling on the couch catching up on some of our shows we enjoy watching together. My brain immediately wanted a snack when I brought my hubby his milk and cookies, but I asked my questions and determined I wasn’t hungry and I didn’t need it to enjoy our time together. It’s been a long day but a good one.  
  2. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Most people ask for oil and vinegar but I’m not a huge fan of vinegar to put it on my salad strait.  But citrus fruits hit the spot for me. So I’ll ask for lemons, limes, and even oranges if they have them.  Even if they don’t have olive oil the citrus fruit helps with the enjoyment of the salad.
    yes on when the kids love the food.  My 11 yr old with the allergies LOVES food, so he’s always up for trying new recipes. When my extremely picky 13 yr old eats the food we know it’s an amazing recipe 
  3. Thanks
    heb2014 got a reaction from BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Good grief - I am not creative enough. I can't remember how many times during my round 1 I ate salad with no dressing because none of the options were complaint. Olive oil and lemons - this is so smart!
    And what you said a couple of posts back about your 11yr old with food allergies - I love this! I remember how shocked and happy I was when my 5 yr old ate 2 helpings of my Whole30 meatloaf (150% more than I expected her to eat). It's so nice when you find a new complaint recipe the whole family will/can eat.
     
  4. Like
    heb2014 got a reaction from lizziehall in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Good grief - I am not creative enough. I can't remember how many times during my round 1 I ate salad with no dressing because none of the options were complaint. Olive oil and lemons - this is so smart!
    And what you said a couple of posts back about your 11yr old with food allergies - I love this! I remember how shocked and happy I was when my 5 yr old ate 2 helpings of my Whole30 meatloaf (150% more than I expected her to eat). It's so nice when you find a new complaint recipe the whole family will/can eat.
     
  5. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Day 27... wait did I read that right, how did this go by so fast!
    6:00 up and at em.  It felt good to go through my morning routine not rushed.  My skin is really beginning to shine.  A few NSV my pants are very loose.  The pregnancy mask is almost completely gone.  I notice faint markings still but I doubt any one else will.  I have very little redness left in my T-Zone, just some pink near my nose and on the end my cheek bone.  Pores are tighter and 80% of the black heads on chin and nose area are cleared up.  I only had one raised pimple on my jaw line with the onset of  that TOM.  Also no breakouts on my chest or shoulders.  I’m on my last belt hole, that’s 5 belt hole difference!  I noticed after putting my belt on, there is a noticeable fold/buckle in the back of my pants.  I have to journal these because I keep thinking I am imagining these things.  I have functional energy in the midst of the most difficult time of my month.  I’m not hitting snooze a thousand times in the morning.  I get up looking forward to my day rather than dreading it.  I’m getting creativity in the kitchen back! I am really enjoying food and it’s many taste that get masked by all the sugar and junk in prepared foods.  
    7:40 S1: Rx bar blueberry and archer beef stick
    Oops my 11 yr DS woke up and asked if I could help him proof read and check his spelling for his 4-H minutes.  So I missed my chance at breakfast, I was so hungry so to keep myself from being tempted I grabbed the Rx bar and beef stick for the road. It helped.
    12:40 M2: teriyaki venison roast with fresh pineapple a top teriyaki sautéed vegetables on a bed of mixed greens with evoo drizzle
    I was going to make cauliflower rice to go with lunch but alas I had none.  Then I remembered I had some raw broccoli cauliflower and carrots that needed to be eaten.  I sautéed them in olive oil and then steamed with a little pineapple juice, sprinkled with ginger and some coconut amino to finish off.  Totally impromptu and completely delicious!  Even my kids liked the veggies.  For the roast I adapted the teriyaki pork recipe from whole 30 slow cooker book and I made it in my pressure cooker. Next time with venison I will probably sear the meat and cook maybe 1/3 of the time as I like my meat to still be very pink. It was still amazing!  I got the dishes done just in time to get baby and I ready and out the door to go get my 13 yr DS from his class.  During lunch my 11 yr old with all the food allergies thanked me for doing the whole 30 “because even though you can’t have a lot of things like rice and stuff, you have still made some absolutely amazing new food this month and I really hope you keep making the new recipes.”  … that there is my biggest NSV! I have happy tears.
  6. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    Day 3 yesterday ... and I stepped back into the world of nursing for the first time in two months.  
    I only took a 4-hour shift, and that was good ~ because of course it turned into five, which would have easily been nine if I hadn't put my foot down.  My relief didn't show up at all ... and I don't really care where the confusion and blame lies in their staffing process ... it does NOT lie with me ~ and I needed to get out of there.
    There was a fleeting thought on my way home:  "...screw it, Asian Kitchen is RIGHT THERE, and they have that hot food ready to go, just waiting on me..."
    Then I texted my husband and asked if there was any steak left.  MAN, we figured out you really can make a killer steak in the air fryer -- in no time at all!  It's amazing.  One of the little joys in life.  
    Steak, lots of steak, with lots of ghee and salt.  Pistachios.  Compliant.  Good enough.  Done.
  7. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Amy_Michigan in Amy's Log for 2020   
    Just 3 more days until I start my whole30!  I am going to actually take my pictures, do measurements, weigh myself- the whole shabang.
    I found an idea for breakfast my first week.  It is called "Pumpkin Apple Breakfast Bake".  It contains these ingredients: pumpkin puree, eggs, full fat coconut milk, ripe banana mashed, apple, pecans on the top, and spices.  You bake it in the oven.  If I make it Sunday, I could eat this for a full week (so it would be just as quick as cereal all week long).  I'm a little scared of what the texture will be like, but I'm willing to try it.
    For lunch I'm going to do salad because it is all I can handle.  Probably taco salad most of the time (same as I've already been making except hold the beans and add more beef).
    Another 2 ideas I found for dinners my first week: "Sweet Potato Chicken Poppers" containing ground chicken, grated sweet potato, coconut oil, coconut flour, green onion, garlic powder, onion powder, salt and pepper.  And "Whole30 Easy Chicken Scalloped Potatoes" with chicken breast, russet potatoes, homemade mayo, dried basil, garlic powder, oregano, tomatoes, yellow onion, salt/pepper,and parsley for garnish.
    For veggies, some favorites I may try to make include roasted broccoli, skillet brussel sprouts in olive oil, roasted carrot fries, and skillet zucchini in olive oil.
     
  8. Like
    heb2014 got a reaction from Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    I agree with you about the timelines. Prepping for my first round, I was  worried that if I read "Today you should be feeling XYZ" and I didn't, particularly if it were a good feeling like more energy, that I would be disappointed and that would lead me off track. But I read the Day by Day book anyway and made notes (and luckily never felt jealous of how I "should" be feeling according the the timeline).
    I will say what's been most helpful about that this time around is that I have my notes. I haven't even been reading the book, but I have been referring to my notes. 
  9. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    6:15 baby wakes me up! I’m thinking it’s 3am I change him put him back down and check the clock and full blown panic sweeps over me.  
    I feel rough still.  It maybe I didn’t get enough water so I feel bloated and constipated.  I didn’t track my water yesterday and I just don’t feel like I drank as much as usual.  Focus on the water today.  Today is a crazy busy day, but I can do this!  I’ve got this.  I’ve come this far, so I’m pressing in toward my mark!
    I’m thinking the stress levels are affecting my appetite still.  I’m not going to force myself to eat, but I did grab a hot mug of bone broth and maybe that will help.  Packed lunches (including mine) got everyone out the door even started load of laundry and hung up the things that had to air dry.  I got most of the dishes except the big bowls and a sheet pan done.  I could sleep for 1,000 hours.  Today I spend in the big city working.  I also had to taxi the hubby to pick up his truck from the shop.  I’m so glad we didn’t go yesterday I probably would have fallen asleep.  The nice part was he drove, which means I was able to get a little over an hour work done on the road.  I can tell my stress level is showing because he keeps asking if I’m okay what’s wrong and how can I help.  I just have a million things that have to get done and trying to sort them and develops reasonable timeline to get them done.  It’s gonna be okay! I’m gonna survive the prep for going out of town and I will enjoy our weekend away working together.  
    NSV: you know that pair of pants and blouse you keep in the back of your closet that you keep just Incase you are in desperate need for clean clothes, but you never wear them because they are just too tight for comfort?  I was down to those today.  So on top of not feeling great due to stress I’m going to have to wear clothes that make feel less than pretty.  I slipped on the pants and they buttoned no bulge and comfortable.  The blouse also fit comfortable and no tightness.  I needed that NSV this morning 
  10. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Oops that power nap took all night!
  11. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    It’s Day 14, two weeks compliant and that is saying something!
    7:55 rise and shine. Lots and lots to do today.  Got everyone up and started food prep.  1st up sweet potato mini quiche.  I scored some sausage at Sprouts that is compliant, and it’s got a kick.  I hope I can handle the heat!
    The mini quiche turned out lovely!  

    https://www.instagram.com/p/B6A6B3dlqGR/?igshid=1dp1uzcylnsaq
    9:30 M1: 1.5 eggs and about 6oz sausage and 1/3c pineapple.
    I had about 1.5 eggs left over and 1/3 of the sausage so I tossed the two in a hot pan and made me a sausage scramble.  Oh I wish I had had some Lettuce left because that would have been great as a wrap.  I finished off the pineapple with it. Yum!  Now to rush off to the boys cooking class.  I have to remember no taste testing the apple pie or quiche they are making.  
    And they plopped a piece of ice cream and pie down in front of me! So I fed most of it to the baby and when he was done… I grabbed the plate and spoon, picked it up took a long whiff as my eyes rolled back into my head I tossed it in the trash. That’s how we tame the inner two year old saying I want it! I want it! I want it!  Not today sweetheart, it just doesn’t match up with your current long term goals darling.  There will be apple pie in your future, just not today so sit your butt down and drink some water.  And so I did.  
  12. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    This is resonated with my soul this morning after my morning quiet time. 
    They say the bravest thing is for an addict to take the first steps to recovery.  Food is my drug of choice, and I am neck deep in the struggle of recovery.  
    This journey is so much more than just what I choose to put in my mouth!  80% of the struggle is mental/emotional junk I must overcome, and no one but me can do it for me.  
    It is Day 12 and I am resolute today and in this moment to change my mindset and my desires towards food and health.  I am better than I was, but not as well as I could be.  The struggle is slow and long, but temporary.  I am changing.  This is my metamorphosis.

  13. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    Thanks @BabyBear ~ I appreciate your support.  
    This journey back to food that is not causing a chemical shit-show in my brain and my entire body ... it is very, very much like quitting smoking.  We've had discussions on the forum about this in the past.  I don't think the majority of people are aware of how much food really does interact with every part of our being.
    I can go one day, EASY.  And I feel better -- good!  Productive!  Two days ... probably even easier.  Things start to become habit again.  
    It's day 3 that is the hardest for smokers.  They say it's because after 72 hours, all of the nicotine is gone from your body.  But we all know there's more to it than that.
    It's those layers of myself and how I got to this point that I need to peel back here.  And it can be downright painful.  
    We self-medicate with food, smoking, alcohol, drugs, shopping, gambling ... and our brain is literally wired to expect those big hits of dopamine.  Not only do we have withdrawal symptoms from the absence of whatever we have removed ~ but we have to FACE those things we were self-medicating for in the first place.  Whew.  Ugly.
    The great news is -- I am a strong and confident person.  I have grown and learned so much.  I love myself for who I am.  And I really don't engage in the "beat myself up" behavior.  So what you are saying resonates with me.  
    If I have 50 "Day 1's" throughout this year ... that's still 50 days of good eating that I wouldn't have had otherwise.  Lol.  That's not my goal ... but it IS a tiny win.  
  14. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    Day 1:
    Woke up to my alarm at 7:00 to take my youngest to the first of many Saturdays spent at the local Civic Theater, preparing for a production in which he is guaranteed a part.  I'm excited for him!
    I logged 30 productive minutes of work at home while everyone else was asleep ~ which I am blessed to be able to do with my current, awesome, (non-nursing) job.  Most days I DO wake up refreshed and ready to get busy ... but not even thinking about food.  So I had my usual 8 oz of half-caff coffee while working.
    Dropped my son off at the theater, came home and wanted more coffee ... but told myself I must make some food to go with it.  Tried to post a pic, but it's too big.  If I have to mess around with resizing every time, it's not going to happen.
    10:00:  can of Wild Planet albacore tuna, butter lettuce, frozen blueberries, Tessemae's ranch, ounce of raw almonds, 8 oz half-caff coffee.
  15. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    Numbering days ... well, I want to say it's been a "trigger" for me in the past.  But I'm not sure if that's the right word.
    I said I would never try to do another Whole 30 for a variety of reasons, and this is one of them:  Mentally, something happens to people (SOME people) once they've reached that goal.  They can be strong, sensible people, and have the best of intentions ~ "why, yes, of course I'm going to do a slow and carefully planned out reintroduction" ~ and still, on Day 31+ ... somehow find themselves sitting on the couch after eating ________ thinking, "what the hell just happened?"
    BUT, sometimes our bodies really do need a complete reset.  And Whole 30 is the best there is, IMO.  It's why I've been coming/going for the past 6 years.
    So ... with that said, I'm reluctantly saying that "Day 1" yesterday was a success.
  16. Thanks
    heb2014 got a reaction from BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    This makes me want to say "bless your heart" and give you a hug and all those other strerotypes about Southern hospitality. Thank you so much for sharing your story. 
  17. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Amy_Michigan in Amy's Log for 2020   
    Thanks for the chicken salad recipe!  I've made something like that before - Kale Waldorf Salad with dried cranberries and apples.. It was totally out of my comfort zone but I LOVED it.  I think I'm comparing the two recipes because grapes in salad also seems funky to me, just like apples, but I like taking risks so I'm going to try it.
    Honestly, the morning egg avoidance is 80% because I don't want to cook or heat anything up in the morning.  The other 20% is not loving the texture of reheated eggs.  I've "dealt" with the eggs in the taco casserole that had 2 eggs scrambled into it before baking, but I'm a little grossed out by it.  That is the primary reason I cannot eat breakfast quiches.  So, breakfast meatballs, whole30 trailmix, vegetable soup with meatballs, or an apple with almond butter is all I can think of right now, but I will remain open to other possibilities.  
  18. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Day 7 - The Struggle in the Duldrums
     
    8:00 awake and baby awake.  I’m just not feeling with it.  Baby is cutting a molar and he is just not feeling it either.  I think part of it is my stomach.  I think I may be blocked up.  I am not hungry, the thought of food makes me want to run and hide.  So I am drinking some lemon water while I try to get my bearings on today.
    11:00 S1: Granny Smith Apple and Almond butter.   I am still not hungry but I figured I should put something in my body before I get to point critical and eat all the things.  This was tasty, but I kind of forced it down.  Took 30 minutes to eat an apple.  I did come up with a fix to my pet peeve about natural nut butters… I hate it when all the oil is sitting on the top and the bottom is rock hard and dry when you buy it off a store shelf, it makes a mess trying to mix it back in and then it is gloopy and chunky.  I dumped the whole brand new jar of Almond butter into my VitaMix and blended it for a few seconds, and ta dah, perfectly smooth almond butter.  I spooned it back into its container and now I am a little happy that I have smooth almond butter.  
    3:00 M1: Roasted Chicken breast, spooned some of the pan drippings (fat) onto the breast, LO baked cinnamon apples.  I just wasn’t hungry but knew I should eat something.  The chicken had just come out of the oven, and can I just say how amazing chicken skin is.  Lol. Why would anyone opt to take off the skin and eat sugary condiments instead.  I only ate the skin on the piece I cut off for me… but I won’t say I wasn’t tempted to eat all the skin!  

    For not feeling like myself and every little thing irritating me and feeling like Rip Van Winkle I have been rather productive.  I got the babies yogurt started in the IP.  Two loads of laundry done and finished.  A pork butt into the crock pot for later.  And I roasted a chicken and picked it clean and bagged up the bones for making a stock later.  Plus we got school done,  the boys had a good school day and I was even able to help My 13 DS with his Logic lesson.  I tried to be more present even though I felt very disconnected from everything today.  I decided to nap while baby napped, I got a good 2 hours, which was longer than I had intended, but I woke up feeling much better.  
    I thought perhaps the juice cleanses in December had helped me dodged this blah sick ick feeling, but no there is still illness and toxins my body is needing to dump.  Although I will say this isn’t as bad as it could be.  In the past when I did an anti-inflammatory diet or elimination diet by day 3 or 4 I would come down with horrible flu symptoms and be a zombie unable to physically function for 2-3 days.  So this is good, as bad as I think I have been I am obviously better then I was before I learned about inflammatory foods and body healing.  
    Ha I’ll never for get my first time doing anti-inflammatory diet.  In the fall of 2009 My infant son was so so so very sick.  He had chronic eczema and wasn’t developing fine motor skills because we had to keep mittens or socks on his hands to prevent him from digging at his skin.  After going the conventional rout and seeing him get worse, and not being okay with the long term treatment of steroids externally and internally I started searching for answers, for truth.  Finally a wholistic doctor and nutritionist agreed to see him.  What I knew in my gut by motherly instinct was confirmed… the issue was FOOD!  They leveled with me straight, they said it would be the hardest thing I had ever done, but I was committed to do whatever it takes for my son.  They warned me about the detox “flu” and also that because he was nursing we had to remove all the inflammation markers from my diet first and then from his body before we would see results… 8 weeks, 8 grueling weeks but it didn’t matter, this was my baby we were talking about.  3 days in I got so sick and weak I couldn’t even get out of bed on my own.  My mom had to come get me and my two boys, and we stayed with her for 4 days while I went through the detox.  On top of all this I was going through a tragic divorce, the man I thought I would grow old with had left me 4 months earlier completely blindsiding me.   As the weeks wore on, it got hard because people didn’t understand my nutritional needs and the baby well he was still sick and looked terrible.  My parents started pressuring me saying it wasn’t working we should see improvement.  But I remember the doctor saying we won’t see improvement until your gut and blood is clean and then his.  8 weeks.  I held onto that 8 weeks with all my might.  It caused some division between family and friends again because food was more social than it was nourishment in my circles.  Because I was in flight or fight I didn’t communicate clearly my dietary needs and well People began to become offended because I would have to turn down food or dinner invites or bring my own food.  They just didn’t get it.  This wasn’t a thing people did back then.  I might as well have been talking about voodoo and witchcraft.  In fact my dad nicknamed me the witch doctor using foods and herbs to heal.  There wasn’t a hundred different bloggers with amazing recipes that I could lean on.  Shoot there wasn’t even a cook book I had found.   I was in no mans land, alone, but determined.   8 weeks was finally upon us and his skin began to miraculously clear up… the triggers were leaving his body.  He was always a happy baby, but the amount of joy that began to radiate from my little one was amazing.  We had found our answers.  Through introduction of foods and some testing we have found he has 12 different food allergies.  Some causing hormone disruption and eczema others more sever and anaphylactic.  In that process I lost 50lbs in 4 months time.  I was smaller then I had ever been even as a teenager.  That posed its own challenges especially as newly single mother.  The unwanted comments and admirers were  obnoxious and annoying and sometimes even scary (stalker scary).  This also made some weirdness around the family too, now instead of needing to loose weight they commented on how I needed to gain weight.  I didn’t, I was for the first time in my life at a healthy weight, which made my overweight family members uncomfortable especially when it came to meals together.  I learned a lot, like how to use herbs and spices to dress up real foods rather than relying on a box for everything.  I learned how to make special treats and foods that didn’t include any of my sons allergies.  I adapted a lot of our lifestyle and we were better for it.  Even my parents started making some changes, to improve their health issues.  I tell my boy he is our true super hero because he saved all of us through his allergies.  Had it not been for that we may have never dived into the world of real food.  For a little over three years I ate mostly Whole Foods, with a few worthy indulgences.  Doing a reset twice a year to keep our health in check.  My weight settled in and I was size 4/6 for those three years… then I fell, off the kids bunk beds.  The ladder I was using to retrieve things off of their bed broke and I fell.  I broke both bones in my left fore arm… after several hours of surgery I had a very very long recovery ahead of me.  Even though it doesn’t seem like it would be.  This was very traumatizing physically, mentally and emotionally.  For the first few weeks I couldn’t even manage to fasten my own bra.  I couldn’t wash my own hair.  And cooking whole real foods was more than I could manage.  I did try but I became so overwhelmed and there was so much pain and so much fatigue and depression that all came tumbling down around me… I began to default back to my old ways and old life.  I didn’t totally go back. I couldn’t, but convenience became the goal.   I just had to survive and make sure my kids survive.  Some days were so bad that my 5 yr old had to “cook” me a hot dog in the microwave.  And then I would cry and the depression and feeling sorry for myself became so much worse.  What kind of mother was I.  Instead of reaching out for help I retreated into myself.  I felt shame, fear, guilt because I belittled the trauma I had gone through.  I didn’t understand why I wasn’t just bouncing back.  I didn’t understand the trauma.  I thought all would be okay once I had the cast off.  It wasn’t… I had severe nerve damage.. I couldn’t use my hand or arm.  I went through a year of therapy and still wasn’t 100%, and I believe this damaged me even more… but it also brought out my fighting spirit when the doctor said I should be happy with 80% use of my hand and arm considering what I had been through…. I fought fiercely and dived into the study of medicinal herbs and essential oils.  I found truth and answers and began healing my nerves that I was told would never heal.  But still I was disconnected from food.  I have had in the back of my head for the past 8 years that I need to do a reset, but the memories of the first always came flooding back.  The isolation, the lack of good recipes, the strain on relationships… I just couldn’t get there, until now.  
    So has today been a little rough, yes.  But it has given me time also to remember where I have come from, and where I want to go.  I think today has helped in the beginning of healing emotionally and mentally from all the trauma.  I’m realizing I couldn’t do it because I have been so broken.  So now I am fighting fiercely to find truth and answers to heal me once again, only this healing is more spiritual, mental, emotional than it is physical.  I can now see that my weight I put on over the past 8 years, isn’t about my diet, but about my person.  
    After I journaled and had a good cry I began to feel again. I felt some joy, some pain, and some hunger.  
    9:45 M2 crockpot pineapple pork butt. And a salad with W30Ranch.  It wasn’t fancy but it was good, and it nourished me beyond just the physical.  I saved  the recipe for the pork recipe when showmewholeliving was being showcased on whole 30 recipes IG.  It’s a fast easy put together, like less then 10 minutes and that includes gathering all my ingredients. It made a ton of meat and now I’m dreaming up fun ideas on how to use up the left overs.
      https://www.instagram.com/p/B52s3OqliYQ/?igshid=97e9paaxuq1
    Although I didn’t eat three meals today, I don’t believe I needed the three meals.  Today was a purge of my soul.  I got through another layer.  Although there were no desires to quit or cheat or step on the scale, today was a battle one that I feel I won.  I learned a lot about me today.  Who I was, what I’ve been through, who I want to become, most importantly who I am now.  I am a survivor, a fighter to the end, a broken person, a nurturer, protector, a beautiful person who is healing one day at a time.  I am that very hungry caterpillar In metamorphosis to become a glorious butterfly.  
    Day 7 is finished. One week accomplished.  It seems so minuscule, but yet it means so much!
  19. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Its Day 6 Y’all!  Warning I cried writing some of this!
    6:40 up and at em! I have to get My 13 yr old son out the door to his class that is an hour away.  I got me dressed baby up and pottied and dressed.  Helped My 13 DS get his lunch together.  I grabbed a banana and my water for a snack to hold me over the until I get home to make breakfast.  I know it’s not an ideal snack, but I figure it’s better than going to BK and getting a double croissant sandwich which was my custom a few months ago.  
    Lol oh me! Hubby called just before I was about to turn on our road and asked if I could go get him a steak biscuit from Hardee’s.  How could I turn him down he sounded so pitiful, gosh darn it I love that man! Of course I would! Thank goodness I ate the banana.  I got his food, and it surprised me that I didn’t have any desire to eat it.  I should mention at that point I was listening to Melissa’s pod cast “Do the thing” and the whole 30 and weight loss  episode was on, and I was crying like a little girl who lost her puppy.   When she started talking about why you shouldn’t remain on the whole 30 if you still have more weight to lose it struck a very deep chord with me.  It finally connected with me that I believe deep down subconsciously that I deserve to be punished for my weight and how that has affected the way I see me and any efforts I make at weight loss,  why even the 12lbs I lost in December (IN DECEMBER) wasn’t enough.  I have been so angry, upset, disgusted  with myself for allowing the weight to pile back on 8 years ago. What I didn’t stop to realize is that it piled back on because of an traumatic injury that broke me physically mentally and emotionally.  I have to heal from that and give myself space and care to overcome the trauma I endured.  Even now the physical injury is not 100% I still deal with nerve issues, strength issues, pain and aching although I have come so far in the physical recovery there is still the reminder.  Even more damaging than the physical was the mental and emotional and until today I don’t think I realized how damaged I was and I have done nothing to heal my mental and emotional.  I have apologized to myself profoundly for being so cold, so mean, so judge mental when what I needed was care, healing and grace.  Wow! I would have never thought a food experiment would lead to all this.  I will definitely be listening to this podcast again to glean more because I kind of got lost in my tears and snot this go around.  
    10:30 finally eating breakfast! I heated up some leftover fajita steak and peppers.  Sautéed a large handful of spinach and then scrambled both of those in with two eggs.  I put em in a bowl and topped with tomatoes avocados and some compliant roasted garlic red chili salsa.  It was tasty, so very tasty.  I used my new bamboo utensils my mom bought to make breakfast.  I used the one with Joy,  it says serving up Joy and you know I did just that!  Today is going to be a great day.
  20. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Confession.... I still haven’t been to the grocery store.  I’ve been doing the whole 30 with what I had in the house.  It’s almost become a game.  However I really really want some salad.  So I’m going shopping today, for real for real this time.
    7:30 Baby alarm went off.  Got him on the potty and then fixed his morning drink and got him settled in so I can work out.
    7:45 Exercise: Day 5 45 min - Shoulder Repair Yoga 14 min, Restore Repair Yoga 30 min.  I was so sore last night!  I soaked for an hour in an epsom salt bath, which helped some, but I wasn’t sure I could make it through a full workout.  Especially my thighs and knees.  I decided to not loose momentum I would just do the Shoulder repair yoga, as I was setting that up I saw the Restore and Repair Yoga and decided if the shoulder set didn’t do me in I would try that.  It was exactly what I need.  A major focus on stretching especially the hips and legs.  I am glad I did it.  I am proud of me!  
    A NSV (non scale victory). I had to tighten my Wahoo Ticker.  I noticed yesterday it felt a little loose.  Well today it wouldn’t sit where it is suppose to at my solar plex to monitor my heart rate.  I thought maybe it came loose, but when I went to tighten it I realized that there was no way it just came loose.  So YAY!  
    10:30 M1: 3 eggs with garlic powder basil salt and pepper cooked in coconut oil.  Baked apples tossed in coconut oil and cinnamon.
     
  21. Like
    heb2014 reacted to BabyBear in Very hungry mommy 1st Time whole 30 Jan 2020   
    Day 2
    it felt good to cross off Day 1 this morning!  
    8:00 rise not so much shine!  Got the baby up pottied dressed and fed.  Once I had him settled into his playtime it was time for my workout
    9:00 45 min total - 15 min restorative yoga for my shoulder 30 min post natal over all body workout.  My 1st Time being able to complete with minor modifications.  I was nasty when I was done... so shower time
    10:45 M1: 3 eggs fried in coconut oil, 1/2 pomegranate, and 1/2 a cucumber.  
    I’ve already sucked down two tumblers of water.  Thanks to the workout.  
    Its a rainy day! Blah!  But I got a payment in so yay I can go get some whole 30 meal supplies.  
    Some ideas for food
    Snack ideas and quick fixes
    Apples and almond butter
    Deli meat lettuce wraps with avocado tomatoes or bell peppers
    Egg muffins
    Deviled eggs
     
    Breakfast ideas
    scrambled eggs with bell peppers or spinach and tomatoes avocado
    Sweet potato quiche
    Steaks and hashbrowns
     
    Lunch ideas
    chicken salad cucumber boats
    Salad with shredded chicken or pork or deviled eggs
    Barbecue and potato with broccoli
    Sausage potatoes and green beans and Cajun
    Lettuce and deli meat roll ups with a salad
    Leftovers
     
    Dinner ideas
    sweet and sour chicken with cauliflower rice
    Herb crusted steaks with asparagus and mashed potatoes
    Pan fajitas with onions peppers lettuce tomatoes avocado
    Sausage and peppers and onions on the salad greens
    Pineapple pork with salad and sweet potato
  22. Like
    heb2014 reacted to Amura in Setting personal guidelines for my food freedom   
    One of the things I've learned in my Whole30 is that clear boundaries work very well with me. 
    Because I acquired some compromises, it was quite easy to say NO to things that I would usually struggle with (such as sweet treats).
    That's why I decided to create my own guidelines to help me in my food freedom. This guidelines are just that, guidelines, so in special ocassions I may
    go a little stray - but within reason.
    Just note that they are not Whole30-ish!
     
    Breakfast This was a game changer.
    I've always been a breakfast person, but never bothered to cook much for breakfast. Now I know my breakfasts were lacking something.
    But a whole breakfast - protein, veggies and fat - allows me to go through the morning without feeling hungry at all, hence not snacking on the not-so-
    healthy options avaliable at work.
    GUIDELINE #1: Prepping ahead a full plate of compliant breakfast, according to template.
    Veggies The other really important nutritional fact I've learned: quite a bit of veggies in every other meal is not enough veggies. At all.
    I was not eating veggies at breafast, just a bit of them at lunch, only really focusing on them at dinner. That had to change.
    GUIDELINE #2: Half a plate of veggies in each meal. No excuses.
    Legumes Legumes are a vegetable source of protein, which often led me to think of them as equivalent to veggies. They are not.
    It does not make sense to add more protein - which is what I typically do. Instead, I should be adding lots of veggies to my lentils/chickpeas/beans stews
    - but I prefer them in much smaller amounts.
    I have a plan though.
    GUIDELINE #3: Have a side dish (full of veggies) to complement legume stews.
    Rice, pasta and similar grains The way I cook them, rice and pasta are pretty much the same kind of dish.
    They do not offer as much protein as legumes, but they are definetely not short on energy and they are neither fat nor veggies, so I think I ought to
    regard them in a similar way.
    Also they tend to go with protein, sometimes dairy. 
    GUIDELINE #4: Add plenty of veggies to my rice/pasta dishes, and/or have a side dish of veggies.
    Also I'm setting a limit of up to one meal a week with these ingredientes, because even if I add veggies I'll be skipping on protein.
    Bread I bake our own bread. We don't eat a lot, so a piece will last about a week.
    We eat other bread-like dishes (pizza, empanada, sandwich) quite occassionally, so I'm not gonna worry about this one detail much.
    GUIDELINE #5: Consume bread on a bare minimum basis, the smaller amount possible.
    Dairy I use milk/cream in sauces. I eat yoghurt as desert. I may eat a small piece of cheese.
    It's never a lot, but it probably adds up. Specially if that means I would not eat as much proper food.
    GUIDELINE #6: Keep creamy sauces to a minimum, watch out the serving size.
    Eat yoghurt and cheese only occasionally.
    Sugar I'm not adding sugar to my tea anymore and that makes me feel proud of myself.
    I'm also not giving up to treats that I'm being offered.
    GUIDELINE #7: Limit sweet treats to special ocassions. Even in those cases, prioritize homemade ones.
     
    I'll be following these guidelines (and tweak them any further if I learn anything else) and will use this thread for accountability.
    Just some data input for future reference:
    My weight on day 0 was 89.5 kg, My weight on day 31 was 85.7 kg (almost 4 kg down!) My weight two weeks later (after reintroduction) was 84.3 kg (so I lost 1.4 kg more) I plan to weight myself once a month or so, to monitorize whether this approach works fine or not.
  23. Like
    heb2014 reacted to kirbz in Kirbz's Whole30 Log   
    ROUND 3, Day 15: Tuesday, September 16
    Meal 1: Wild Zora Butte Cacao Banana breakfast mix with flaxseed meal, nuts, bananas, strawberries, mango, and cacao nibs 
    Exercise (9 hours, 35 minutes): 6.38-mile, 6-pitch rock climb with 2,211 of elevation gain and topping out at 13,713 feet (131 average HR; 168 max HR)  
    Intra-Workout Snack: two pouches of peach, apricot, and banana baby food; two pouches of blueberry, pear, and purple carrot baby food; half blueberry RXBar; snack pack of coconut butter 
    Intra-Workout Meal 2: tuna pouch packed in olive oil  
    Meal 3: Wild Zora Caldera Chicken Curry freeze-dried meal with chicken, sweet potato, pineapple, spinach, bell pepper, and onion 
    Water Intake: unknown 
    Symptoms/NSVs:
    Poor fueling for long-duration exercise  Thoughts/Reflections: Well, despite my doubts yesterday, I did it! I made it to the [almost] top of Bear Creek Spire (I didn't get on top of the summit block because that's just stupid). And it was amazing! It was hard. Oh-so hard. But amazing. The climbing was challenging. The ridge traverse was exposed and super scary, but fun. The views were spectacular (I counted over 30 alpine lakes from the top). And I reached the highest point on earth I've ever been on! 
    It was the approach and the ridiculous descent that was so difficult for me. It was steep on the way up with some boulder hopping. That was hard. But the way down was downright scary. We had to descend a bouldery scree field where everything moved, even the giant blocks of granite. Guh. It was awful. I quite literally kept seeing images of me falling down the boulder field when I closed my eyes that night. Though I did make it out alright.
    On another note, my fueling strategy totally sucked. I watched as my guide happily ate cheese and salami and hard-boiled eggs and dehydrated mango and banana. And I had my stupid baby food pouches and packets of tuna and RXBars and coconut butter. Guh. It tasted so gross and I didn't want to eat any of it. But I needed to eat. But it wasn't enough anyway. There just wasn't enough calories in them. And then, when we got back to camp, I watched as she ate fresh rice with curry paste and peas and meat and naan. While I ate another freeze-dried meal. Guh.  
    So yeah, I don't know about being Paleo in the alpine. I know people do it. But I don't know if I want to. I'll finish my Whole30, but I think I'd rather eat differently on long days at high altitude.... 
    [Photo 1: a mile or two into the trail, with Bear Creek Spire in the background (the tallest peak just to the left oft the tree)] 
    [Photo 2: looking down on part of the larger of the two boulder fields we had to go up and then down on the hike; this wasn't even the climbing part]
    [Photo 3: the view from the [almost] top of Bear Creek Spire at nearly 13,700 feet!] 



  24. Like
    heb2014 reacted to kirbz in Kirbz's Whole30 Log   
    ROUND 3, Day 17: Wednesday, September 18
    Meal 1: none
    Exercise (3 hours, 26 minutes): 4.86-mile backpacking hike with 384 feet of elevation gain (130 average HR; 154 max HR)  
    Snack: can of coconut water; glass of orange juice; one and a half slices of deli turkey
    Meal 2: grilled ribeye steak with seasoning; baked potato with ghee; bowl of zucchini bone broth soup; 8 oz glass of electrolyte supplement
    Meal 3: none 
    Water Intake: unknown 
    Symptoms/NSVs:
    none Thoughts/Reflections: Wow. I have never been so tired on a hike. My footwork was so sloppy and I felt very unstable descending those boulder fields. I was so afraid I was going to break an ankle or fall just because I was tired. And then when we finally got back to the real trail, which was mostly flat, I was barely moving forward. Shawn and my guide had to stop frequently to wait for me to catch up. But I made it! I did it! I did it even though I really didn’t think I could!
    Also, I didn’t eat enough today. I know it and I didn’t really care. This is why I was doing Whole30. This is the only big thing I have planned for my 30 days and I’m done. So, I just didn’t care. It wasn’t worth the effort. It was enough of a success to convince myself to continue, because I sure wanted some pizza when I got home. And some peanut M&Ms…
  25. Like
    heb2014 reacted to KiwiKendra in KiwiKendra's Log from New Zealand   
    I'm on DAY 4 - OMG I'm doing this! Heck I am soooo glad I took this week off from work though. How you people with young families cope I just don't know. I only have a husband to contend to (the kids are now full grown and have left the nest). Trying to get into a routine when there is only MYSELF to look after (hubby can fend for himself) this week has still been daunting - hence why I haven't been back here for a few days. When I'm back at work next week, I'll have to do this at the end of the day, probably on a daily basis to keep up with it. 
    Well, first day of Spring came and it was a beautiful sunny day, and I was in relapse mode from helping my daughter move house. She's had to move to a smaller place so some of her stuff has come back home (why does that happen even though our kids "leave home"). We have a lot of stairs so there was lots of exercise had over the weekend and my knees and ankles were killing me!. So hubby and I actually relaxed on the Sunday and did practically nothing. (made the mistake of finishing off a box of chocs with him while watching a movie and as you will all realise, I paid for it on DAY 2!!) - hey my spelling is NZ spelling okay? I'm not changing that 's' to a 'z' its just not right. 
    So I decided that Monday was DAY 1 (silly to start an experiment on a Sunday!)  
    My first day off from work, and that felt good in itself. Decided to visit my Mum and took along a protein salad and a huge bottle of water. She's being really supportive and although she offered me a cup of tea or coffee, I just cant stomach that yet without milk. I drank from my large bottle of water instead. Now usually I would call into the bakery on the way to mum's to get us "something nice to have with coffee" and as I was driving down her street it hit me that this is one habit I am definitely going to break! Bless her, she offered me some grapes and an apple to have with my salad (so I did).
    Then it was off to the supermarket with my RealPlans app all ready for me to just click on those circles as I added items to my trolley. I felt good! it really is true that the healthy foods are around the outside of the supermarket, and the not so good stuff is in the aisles. WOW. I wandered over to the "gluten free" area and found a couple of raw energy bars. Now I have a confession.... I was drawn to the name of one of them: "Organic Lemon Cheesecake" and the other was an "Organic Cacoa, Fig" and the ingredients are Whole30 compliant! I know, I know.....they should not be used to replace a cream cake or something sugary as a treat. I made a mental note that these two items would be part of my Emergency Foods to stash at the bottom of my bag for those "caught in really heavy traffic" or "about to faint coz I haven't eaten enough" saga's (does that 2nd one count actually?)
    Anyways, I finally got out of the supermarket and I felt so proud of the amount of good, clean food in my trolley. I was going to dash home and put it all away and start creating! By this time (because I didn't allow for the fact that it takes a LOT LONGER to grocery shop these days) it was already 2pm and I'd actually had my lunch at 11.30am....and I felt really light headed so I grabbed the "Organic Cacoa, Fig bar" and munched on that as I drove the 40 mins home. Day 1 and I've already had an emergency!! LESSON learned - eat MORE at meal times.
    Once I got home and put everything away I started on the "No Fuss Salmon Cakes" - well that was a disaster! OOps, no it's a stepping stone because I think I put too much sweet potato with it (can't find cans of sweet potato) so I boiled up some of my own and mashed it in. They were dry, and a little burnt and not that enjoyable. LESSON learned: I now know that my new oven is "hotter" than my old one. (another stepping stone crossed towards being a better cook - woohoo)
    Hubby decided to make himself stew and dumplings for his dinner and I made myself busy writing in my "Day by Day" book and planning next days meals. I was also hoping for a good nights sleep as I've been waking at 2am for the past couple of nights.
    DAY 2 dawned and OMG my head was killing me! I just wanted to die. Surely this cant be happening after one day on this experiment?!  I crawled out of bed once hubby had gone off to work. I forced down a couple of pieces of the Spinach Frittata (which looked amazing when it came out of the oven, I was feeling hopeful, but before I got chance to take its selfie, it collapsed, which was a reflection of how I was feeling at the sight of it). Awwww.  The rest of the morning is a blur, I don't even have Meal 2 written down in my book but I do remember drinking more water and going back to bed to sleep. I'd received a text from Kirsty at work and she said she's jumped a couple of stages as she was at the "Kill all things" stage. I told her about my headache and she said, just rest and sleep, so I did. (so good having someone doing this with me - as you all are if you're reading this) 
    Later on in the day I created the Thai Basic Chicken and had that for my dinner. It wasn't too bad and there were leftovers for next days lunch.
    DAY 3 and I felt a lot better, although another restless night tossing and turning. I am really struggling with breakfasts - I don't enjoy veg for brekky. I miss my grain toast with tahini, honey, LSA and fresh fruit on top. (marked that in my book as one of my cravings). So today I had left over frittata with a few slices of kiwifruit on the side.  MY lunch was WAY BETTER, left over Thai chicken with a bunch of cos lettuce leaves and slices of avocado and WAIT FOR IT....some MAYO drizzled over the top.  DID YOU HEAR THAT?? MAYO - I made MAYO!! WOOHOO  and it tasted okay!!! OMG I was ecstatic at that success believe me.
    The rest of the afternoon I chilled out and watched a movie (after doing some housework). I was feeling good.  It was MY TIME and I was going to make the most of it. I didn't' realise the time though and before I knew it hubby had walked through the door and I was sat watching tv. What the heck...its my holidays. I'm allowed.   He has a really bad habit of talking through a movie if he's not interested in it, and it was almost the end, so he went off into the kitchen. He came into the lounge to ask if I wanted a coffee, but he was holding a goddamn pikelet with lashings of butter. OMG how insensitive is that?!?!?!  He said "well I cant stop eating just because you are"..... I'll park that one.
    Once the movie had finished and hubby had finished in the kitchen it was my turn. While he dozed on the couch watching sport (LOL) I made soup and some Latka fritters from Real Foods. Its so handy having that on my phone so I can just scroll and follow the instructions. However it was about 9.30pm by the time I was all done and cleaned up and then I didn't feel like eating. BAD I know, but honestly, I just wanted to crawl into bed. Forgot to fill in my "Day by Day" book, so I did that this morning.
    Day 4 dawned, thank goodness because I nearly murdered my hubby during the night due to his snoring! However I did manage to dose off again (instead of getting up and reading). I'm not sleeping late but its going through my mind that I'm now halfway through my week off work and I haven't done my "head declutter" that I had intended. I will work on that and put plans in place. I'll be making a Ranch Dressing with part of my Mayo. hehe and make something for tonights dinner with the organic mince that hubby brought home yesterday. I'm hoping I can tempt him with a mince dish - lets see. Today is going to be a good ORGANISED kind of day. I feel it.
    My wins so far is that I'm keeping the kitchen clean despite all this prep and cooking. I made MAYO and it tastes good. I'm still here and doing it!.  WOOHOO.