ShadowInTheKitchen

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  1. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to MadyVanilla in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Reading through your posts I realize how right you are with what you wrote in my journal - we are not alone in this.  I would have to agree that spending time in the presence of teenagers is so refreshing!   
    The shepherd's pie sounds delicious!  It's meals like that that are so filling and nourishing and just plain satisfying.   
    Here's to meeting your goals, and if you don't letting it go and trying again.  The sugar dragon will be tamed!  
  2. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to MadyVanilla in Take Advantage   
    @Semi, @ShadowInTheKitchen, and @Contessa - thank you for your kind, supportive words.  I actually cried a little reading them.  I think I do need a good cry!    
    I will get through this, of course.  And I can do this without completely derailing the progress I've made.  I'm worried that I'm going to fall back into spending my days gorging on a dozen Dunkin Donuts, followed by some sort of meal from McDonald's, and on and on everyday.  And I've had days close to this, feeling about to tip over that edge, during the last two weeks.  But it's ok, because for every non-compliant day I've had, I've gathered myself up and returned to what I know helps me.  At the same time, I'm getting tired with myself, repeating the same pattern, making the same statements in my journal entries, but not getting fully back on track and moving forward.  I have to remember that this is success - in the past, I've fallen off, given up, and not attempted to return to healthy habits until months, or even years, later.  So, let me just remember that I have had more calm, easy days over the last two months than I've had tough ones and let me be gentle with myself as I work through this holding pattern.  
    Yesterday was a non-compliant but not an overeating day.  I live in the path of Tropical Storm Isiasis, and it was a bit of a tense time with lots of tornado warnings occurring and having both of my kids on opposite ends of town.  I did not get to the gym - the electricity was out after the storm had calmed.  It probably wasn't a good day to pick to start back anyway, lol!  I did 20 minutes of yoga last night, did not hit other goals, but again, I still have lots of week left.  
    Mood-7, Energy-6, Pain-2.  Shoulder is improving, knees not an issue.
    M1-3 eggs cooked in olive oil, topped with homemade mayo.  
    M2-Leftover ceasar salad with chicken
    M3-Chicken with one of the Primal Kitchen sauces I have in the cabinet.  Sauteed zucchini
     
    I've made my schedule for today, which includes exercise and yoga.  I feel bolstered and ready to tackle the day.  
  3. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to Contessa in Take Advantage   
    I don't know what this says about where I am today, but I literally lifted a fist in the air and shouted "YES!" when I read this.  Good thing I live alone and was not browsing the internet at a public library. So many important reflections in this paragraph!
    My therapist (a woman who should truly be inducted into sainthood) says that part of powerful behavior changes involves getting really sick of our own crap. We have to get sick of our own excuses and our own patterns before we're ready to shift. We have to stop buying what the old, outmoded version of us is trying to sell. I'm delighted by the sense of irritated boredom I hear in that paragraph.
    Speaking personally, my growth area isn't in picking ever more healthy foods to eat every day ("by the end of her life, she ate only pine cones and grass clippings! She was sooooo healthy!"). My growth area is emotional and mental.... noticing the compulsions when they come up, and reflexively turning inward with compassion instead of outward with a grasping hand. This is not about Cheez-Its, it's about exquisite internal kindness.
    For me, exquisite kindness is wholly incompatible with bingey behavior. They just don't go together.
    And of course, exquisite kindness is also the work of a lifetime. Practice, even when it's halting, is progress.
  4. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from MadyVanilla in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    It's so true. Keeping a food log is one thing that works to help bring awareness, but writing down those NSV's are even bigger for me.  It helps me to see how eating is a whole-life thing, not just a tool for weight loss/gain. 
  5. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from Contessa in Take Advantage   
    Mady the reality is that you are not alone.  There is a whole world filled with women walking in the same shoes as you, and all wishing for new shoes too I'll bet ;-) .   I know it isn't easy, especially with all the isolation that is going on right now, to call up a friend or go visit someone, just to get yourself through this.  But you must.  Just a quick call to someone who is lonely too.  It works for me.  You will feel better.
    (((hugs)))
     
  6. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from Contessa in Take Advantage   
    Mady the reality is that you are not alone.  There is a whole world filled with women walking in the same shoes as you, and all wishing for new shoes too I'll bet ;-) .   I know it isn't easy, especially with all the isolation that is going on right now, to call up a friend or go visit someone, just to get yourself through this.  But you must.  Just a quick call to someone who is lonely too.  It works for me.  You will feel better.
    (((hugs)))
     
  7. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    Day 8 yesterday:  8/3/20
    Day 9 today:  8/4/20
    --
    The urge was more strong than ever tonight, to throw this out the window and go buy some wine.  But I did not.  I'm eating compliant food & going to bed sober.
    Sober isn't always a comfortable place to be ... but neither is hungover.  I've got stuff to do.  Stuff that matters.
  8. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from Semi in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Post Whole 30 Day 5, Monday June 15
    M1:1/4 cup salted peanuts while the eggs were cooking, egg salad w/ homemade mayo, green beans, cantaloupe to finish
    M2: romaine salad w/ grapes, avocado, chicken, raspberries to finish
    Snack: 1/2 banana, 1/4 cup peanuts
    M3: spaghetti squash topped with ground beef in marinara sauce
    NSV: I definitely looked thinner first thing this morning when I saw myself in the mirror wearing my yoga pants, so measured my waist again and it was ~3/4" smaller than last week's measurement. The measurement was taken first thing, before breakfast, but last week's was taken later in the day.  I really don't think I lost enough weight in just a week to lose 3/4" off my stomach, which means that I am probably still bloating through the day. 
    I am struggling to understand why I eat so much food sometimes.  I ate way too much today, didn't adjust my portion sizes when I added in the peanuts for snacks, and the cantaloupe and raspberries for dessert after M1 & M2 were totally not because I was hungry. I ate the fruit - including the banana for snack - because it was perfectly ripe, and I didn't want it to go to waste. I wasn't really hungry for it, just wanted to eat it.  I tell myself that I'm eating healthy, and I really do want to have the variety, but I just make my portions too big.  I also buy too much food, then have to eat it or throw it out when it goes bad.  
    My belly started off smaller in the morning but grew throughout the day, and I'm feeling gross tonight before bed.  Ugh.  I feel horrible for eating so much today.  I was awake super early this morning, 5am, up before 6, so I achieved my goal of getting out of bed by 7am, but I didn't sleep well and was wide awake way too early.  I was feeling tired this afternoon, and I think that not having a good sleep impacted my intentions to eat well by somehow misjudging portion sizes.  Maybe.  
    Along with feeling very full tonight I'm feeling bloated with a bit of stomach pain, so not sure if the peanuts are to blame.  I'm going back to eating Whole30 for the next few days.  I want to get back to feeling W30 awesomeness.  And I want to rock those yoga pants again. 
  9. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    Day 7 yesterday:  8/2/20
    --
    I don't have anything to say about yesterday.  It was compliant & fine.
    Today I found out some news that I might want to bury in a bottle of wine tonight.  But guess what?  That news will still be there tomorrow.  And the next day.  And the next.  Forever.
    So I won't.
  10. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in RachelR- Start Date May 4, 2020   
    Wow!  You are looking aMAZing Rachel!  Keep going!!!!
  11. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to RachelR in RachelR- Start Date May 4, 2020   
    I have been MIA....  Hope everyone is doing well.  I'm proud to say that I have continued with primarily eating Whole30 foods.  There have been a few conscious decisions to treat myself- small ice cream last week- as well as some choices to use food I have even if it isn't fully compliant-sausages w/ a bit of sugar in them, corn starch when I couldn't find arrowroot powder for a recipe, etc.  I also made a batch of cookies yesterday because I have been wanting more sweet stuff.  My thought is that if I have in moderation when I'm really wanting it- maybe it will prevent me from just going on a binge.  I may end up throwing them out.  So far my thoughts are- first bite was way to sugary sweet.  I had a headache after eating two and felt more lethargic. But then later before bed- I was contemplating having more but I knew it was out of boredom.  I had a couple more today when I got home from work.  Again- serving size on packet said 2 so that is what I'm trying to stick to.  Probably would have been fine with one.  Honestly- probably didn't need any because it was only when I opened my pantry to put some groceries away that I smelled them and then wanted them.  It's an experiment right now.  Hopefully it doesn't blow up.  I've doing better at making better decisions and still "treating myself."  For example- Last week I just really did not want to cook anything.  Didn't feel like going to Chipotle or Zoe's kitchen where I know I can stay whole 30.  My mind kept going to McDonalds.  I was so torn with myself because I knew whatever it was that I thought I wanted wouldn't taste good in reality.  Anyway...I got in my car and all the way up to the stop light I kept debating with myself.  In the end, I still chose to go and buy something but got a grilled market salad from Chick-Fil-A w/ honey mustard as well as a large fry.  Have to say- the fries were not great.  The salad was good and I enjoyed the honey mustard as I haven't had any sugary dressings.  I may be going down a slippery slope OR last week was just tough and I needed to slack off a bit???  We'll see....
    I still struggle with really feeling like I've made progress when it comes to day in and day out and how my body moves and feels.  My energy still isn't where I hoped it would be but overall I have to remind myself that I am doing a lot better than I was several months ago.  I have to keep reminding myself to focus on the things I have seen change in order to continue with my motivation to keep going forward.  My clothes are fitting better and even some things are too big now.  What I hate is the mind-fuck that occurs with women's clothing sizes.  I can comfortably fit in to my size 18 Old Navy Rockstar skinny jeans but I cannot fit in to my size 18 dress pants from a brand sold at Target.  Again, I have to go over and over to myself about the progress I've made and that with time, those clothes will fit again too.  
    As far as walking on the treadmill and doing the arm toning video.  I wasn't as consistent with the treadmill as things came up on my mom's schedule and instead of walking without her the few days, I just vegged out and been watching The Crown (just started season 3 today).  With the arm video- my goal was to do it 4x/week.  I did ok the first 3 weeks and then the last week in July- I only did it once.  I don't see much of a difference in my photo of my bicep but I can feel a bit of a difference.  I want to keep going with it and become more consistent with this simple video.  Hopefully in September, I'll feel ready to add in some more exercise.  
    Anyway.... I've lost 29.2 pounds since May 3rd.  Here is my progress pictures and my measurements:

     
    Here are the results:  (Measured myself so they may not be exactly accurate). S=start; C=current
    Waist @ belly button- S= 53.5"; C= 50 1/4"
    Waist @ narrowest point- S= 45"; C= 41"
    Hips- S= 54"; C= 50 3/4"
    Thighs- 
    Right- S= 29 3/4"; C=27 1/2" Left- S= 30"; C= 28 1/2" Calves-
    Right- S= 18 1/4"; C=17" Left- S= 18 3/4"; C= 16 3/4" Biceps (making a muscle)- 
    Right- S= 17 1/2"; C=17 1/4" Left- S= 17 1/4"; C= 17 3/4" Wrists-
    Right- S= 7 1/4"; C= 7" Left- S= 7 1/4"; C= 6 7/8" Neck- S= 15"; C= 14 1/4"
    Bust- S= 49"; C= 46 3/4" (not sure if this is right but I measured twice) 
    Chest S= 43"; C= 40 1/4"
     
     
  12. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to MadyVanilla in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Recalling, restarting, re instituting those healthy habits that work.  The NSVs are what keep us coming back! 
  13. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    W30 R3 Sunday August 2, 2020
    M1: 1 egg fried w/ 2 tbsp bacon crumbles, 1/2 cup of salted cantaloupe
    M2: favourite green salad (romaine, celery, cucumber, avocado, chicken, avocado oil & lemon juice, dried salad herbs)
    Snack: non-compliant potato chips
    Snack: non-compliant egg rolls with plum sauce
    M3: l/o green salad (no chicken)
    NSV: I didn't have any ice cream today :-)
    NSV: I kept the kitchen clean and tidy all day, it feels good to have this under control again.
    NSV: I know that I haven't finished a complete day of Whole30 on this round yet.  What I have done is complete two full days of eating better than I have been since mid June.
    Plans for tomorrow: Civic holiday.  Meal plans and grocery shop.  Argggh I obviously hate to do the meal planning.  Also hoping to tidy up and re-organize the basement freezer and fridge.
     
     
  14. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    W30 R3 Saturday August 1, 2020
    M1: 1 cup chopped kale pan fried in ghee with leftover sausage, 2 eggs over easy, 1 cup boiled yellow beans, 1 cup salted cantaloupe chunks
    M2: 1 cup carrots sticks boiled, leftover Everything Bagel seasoned meatballs with leftover fried onions and white potato
    M3: totally non Whole30 compliant wine, appetizers, dinner and dessert at friends' house but definitely what I needed for my mental health
    NSV: I got my fridge in order and prepared some vegetables so they are ready to go this week, and I sharpened my knives.  It was a busy day just catching up with housework and laundry. My plan to get everything in order for Whole 30 was a bit too ambitious for one day, but I'm not worried, I can continue to work at it.  Baby steps are better than nothing.  
    Plans for Sunday: Make mayo.  Boil eggs.  Prepare menu for the week.  Keep the kitchen clean and tidy.  It's Sunday - relax with a book for a few hours in the afternoon.
  15. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from Contessa in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Whole 30 Round 3, Saturday August 1, 2020 re-intro and goals
    I'm back after a crazy July of feeding my Sugar Dragon way too much, especially ice cream.  My waist measurement has increased and my waist-to-hip ratio is at a staggering 0.906 today, which means I need to lose fat from around my mid section especially, but also generally all over.  This morning I saw a video of myself and I don't like how I look (my body is shaped like a sausage, without a defined waist).  I need to change that.  
    I was considering following the DASH diet, but I decided to do another Whole 30 instead because I like the results I had previously.  Whole30 taught me how to cook real food, how to eat big and healthy meals that leave me satisfied until my next meal, and I learned to not snack between meals while adhering to the program. Since completing my last W30, I now successfully go from breakfast to lunch without any snacking between, but I need to continue to work on developing better habits to get me through mid to late afternoons, which is when I typically raid the freezer for ice cream.  I also started to eat sweets for dessert in the evenings, pie or cookies, a totally unnecessary habit that I'd like to break.  Not that I don't want to ever have dessert again because that would be too restrictive and totally unrealistic. I just want it to be something special when I do have it.  The DASH diet can wait until I learn to overcome the temptation to snack mid-day and learn to control myself around desserts.
    I've noticed that the mid day energy slump has returned, and I miss having the Tiger Blood that comes with eating clean foods all the time.  
    Finally, my sleep has been great or not so great, depending on the night, or likely more specifically depending on what I ate the day or two before. I hope that this W30 experiment will help me to discover what is impacting my sleep quality. 
    My healthy habit hacks have fallen aside. It's been too long since I've had boiled eggs or carrot & celery sticks on hand in the fridge, and my last homemade mayo went moldy.  With work being super busy this summer I have been neglecting keeping the kitchen tidy after every meal, which is an energy drain when I do get back into the kitchen. To have to clean the kitchen before I start to cook is just awful. 
    So today, I will clean and organize my fridges and freezers again. I have already removed most of the junk food so its out of sight and not a temptation.  I will prepare veggie sticks and make some homemade mayo.  I will wash some romaine and boil some eggs. The kitchen will be kept clean and tidy and I will sharpen my knives.  I have a solid list of favourite Whole 30 meals that I rotate through regularly, and will prepare a full week's worth of meal plans including mostly Whole 30 for my family too.  I hope to find something to distract myself in the afternoon when I long for something sweet, maybe I'll take a walk or do some yoga.  As long as my dinner plan is made and cooking will be ready-to-go-easy, I think I will be ok.  I know I can do this because I've done it before.  I just gotta get strong and kick my Sugar Dragon til it's gone gone gone.  
     
  16. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to Contessa in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    In matters of food preparation, work, and life in general, this is fantastically true. I'm glad you didn't hesitate to return to a food approach that works for you. Wishing you a joyful Sunday!
  17. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from Contessa in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Whole 30 Round 3, Saturday August 1, 2020 re-intro and goals
    I'm back after a crazy July of feeding my Sugar Dragon way too much, especially ice cream.  My waist measurement has increased and my waist-to-hip ratio is at a staggering 0.906 today, which means I need to lose fat from around my mid section especially, but also generally all over.  This morning I saw a video of myself and I don't like how I look (my body is shaped like a sausage, without a defined waist).  I need to change that.  
    I was considering following the DASH diet, but I decided to do another Whole 30 instead because I like the results I had previously.  Whole30 taught me how to cook real food, how to eat big and healthy meals that leave me satisfied until my next meal, and I learned to not snack between meals while adhering to the program. Since completing my last W30, I now successfully go from breakfast to lunch without any snacking between, but I need to continue to work on developing better habits to get me through mid to late afternoons, which is when I typically raid the freezer for ice cream.  I also started to eat sweets for dessert in the evenings, pie or cookies, a totally unnecessary habit that I'd like to break.  Not that I don't want to ever have dessert again because that would be too restrictive and totally unrealistic. I just want it to be something special when I do have it.  The DASH diet can wait until I learn to overcome the temptation to snack mid-day and learn to control myself around desserts.
    I've noticed that the mid day energy slump has returned, and I miss having the Tiger Blood that comes with eating clean foods all the time.  
    Finally, my sleep has been great or not so great, depending on the night, or likely more specifically depending on what I ate the day or two before. I hope that this W30 experiment will help me to discover what is impacting my sleep quality. 
    My healthy habit hacks have fallen aside. It's been too long since I've had boiled eggs or carrot & celery sticks on hand in the fridge, and my last homemade mayo went moldy.  With work being super busy this summer I have been neglecting keeping the kitchen tidy after every meal, which is an energy drain when I do get back into the kitchen. To have to clean the kitchen before I start to cook is just awful. 
    So today, I will clean and organize my fridges and freezers again. I have already removed most of the junk food so its out of sight and not a temptation.  I will prepare veggie sticks and make some homemade mayo.  I will wash some romaine and boil some eggs. The kitchen will be kept clean and tidy and I will sharpen my knives.  I have a solid list of favourite Whole 30 meals that I rotate through regularly, and will prepare a full week's worth of meal plans including mostly Whole 30 for my family too.  I hope to find something to distract myself in the afternoon when I long for something sweet, maybe I'll take a walk or do some yoga.  As long as my dinner plan is made and cooking will be ready-to-go-easy, I think I will be ok.  I know I can do this because I've done it before.  I just gotta get strong and kick my Sugar Dragon til it's gone gone gone.  
     
  18. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen reacted to Contessa in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Wishing you well, Shadow. Take good care — we'll be cheering for you.
  19. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from Brewer5 in Like an Onion   
    If we have another world wide lock-down like what happened in March & April, this is what I would do.  I'm glad that I took time this spring to do some serious deep cleaning in my house, and to start this very successful W30, but now things are back to normal and busy as ever, and I really want a few days off  a few weeks off just to fix a diet and meal plan that's right for me. If only there was a W30 spa/retreat we could all meet up at... 
  20. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from MadyVanilla in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Post Whole 3o Day? Tuesday June 30
    M1: greens, eggs, and ham (broccoli, 2 eggs over easy fried in ghee, prosciutto pan fried til hot)
    Snack: cookie dough
    M2: my favourite green salad with avocado and chicken
    Snack: cookie dough
    M3: spaghetti squash with compliant Kirkland marinara sauce, 1 Greenfields non-compliant cheddar sausage (dairy & sugar)
    According to MyFitnessPal, if it wasn't for that cookie dough I would be down another 5 lbs if I eat like this every day over the next 5 weeks.  I know why I made the cookie dough, it was because I didn't have anything ready to eat in the fridge.  I can whip up cookie dough in 90 seconds flat, but why?  I didn't even like it very much anyore, and I feel blergh right now - no surprise there.  I would have eaten anything else if it was just ready to grab and go. 
    I am out of sorts in many ways.  My sleep hasn't been great.  I feel snitty.  My 17 yo daughter asked me today when did I start swearing?  Yup, I don't normally swear, but these past few days the *!#!*'s have been flying around here, and there is no good reason for it.  What the heck?  More importantly, what to do?
    I have decided that I am going to sign off for now.  I logged consistently almost every day for two months.  I feel I have the basics down to eat Whole30 most of the time.  I don't beat myself up if I go off plan, unless it is something supremely stupid like making cookie dough and then eating a sh!t load of it. That is an old habit, and it's time to bury it deeper this time.  I'm going to stop logging for a bit, and the time I save from logging and journaling will go towards meal planning and trying some new recipes.  Tomorrow is a new day, a new month.  I'm planning to start the day by going to Mass at my church (Canada Day here), something I have been missing terribly since the lockdowns.  Work has been extremely busy and I am feeling swamped, so want to fix that up too.  My house is not as clean and tidy as I like, which also affects my mood.  I will try to eat as close to Whole30 as possible, as often as I can, and try to keep away from sugar, or at least if I have sugar I want to plan it and look forward to it.  I am also unplugging from social media, hopefully for the month but not sure if that's realistic.  A week anyways.  
    I hope to get back to myself soon.  Even before I began W30 at the beginning of May I wasn't like this.  I'm going to concentrate on eating clean, keeping my house and fridge organized, and learning to cook some new recipes - a goal I had from early on in my journey.  I also had a goal to be able to prep W30/clean meals quickly without too much fuss, and today's foray into the baking cupboard for the butter, flour, sugar and chocolate chips just proves that I'm not where I want to be - yet.  
    I'd like to give a HUGE shout out to everyone who posted their struggles and their victories.  It's been helpful knowing that I'm not alone in this.  I will miss keeping up with you all, but know that I am wishing you success, every. single. day.  Fare well everyone.  I will be absent for a while, keeping on keeping on - I hope, as will you too. 
    Wishing you a happy summer, filled with more nsv's than you can imagine.  
    Sincerely,
    Shadow
     
     
     
     
  21. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Post Whole 30 Day ? Friday June 26
    M1: 2 fried eggs, prosciutto, strawberries
    Snack: chocolate chip banana muffin
    M2: leftover beef and marinara sauce with leftover spaghetti squash, sweet potato, carrots, rutabaga
    M3: leftover chicken and potato casserole with broccolini
    Scale victory: I calculated my BMI and am very happy with my progress.
    Had that muffin, it wasn't worth it.  Also was craving tons the rest of the day, but at least I didn't feed my dragon again, so go me, I'll take that NSV. 
    Am tired of the leftovers, but feeling good that they all got eaten and I didn't throw them out.  Also prepared the leftovers for my family who were a bit ticked that I didn't make something new but hahahaha I don't care!  They are all big boys and girls now, and if they want to prepare a meal every once in ten years or so they can have at it.  Besides, the l/o's tasted great, were prepped a wee bit differently, not just re-heated, and were a long stretch better than anything family would have made from a box, like KD or Hamburger Helper.
     I know where the dragon's lair is. I've been taking measurements almost every day for about two weeks and now have enough data to see a direct correlation between junky food that I eat and my belly measurements.  When I eat junk, my belly grows measurably by the next day.  It must be bloat, it can't be fat because fat doesn't grow that quickly, or does it?  Will I ever be able to enjoy junky sugary stuff again without wearing my sins for my own discomfort and for all to see?  
  22. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Post Whole 30 Day ? Wednesday June 24
    M1:orange root vegetables (rutabaga, sweet potato, carrot) mashed with ghee, herb roasted chicken breast, shredded
    M2: egg salad with chives, carrot
    Snack: handful of walnuts and raisins
    M3: Cat's Chicken Thing (herb and garlic chicken on sliced potatoes & prosciutto), broccolini spears on the side @SchrodingersCat this was delicious 
     
    Post Whole 30 Day?  Thursday June 25 
    M1: broccolini spears, steamed and plated with 2 fried eggs, sweet potato, rutabaga and prosciutto hash, ghee
    M2: leftover spaghetti squash topped with ground beef & Kirkland marinara sauce, spiced up w/ ground oregano and red pepper flakes
    Snack: raspberries & sweet iogo yogurt 
    Snack: vanilla ice cream
    Snack: 2 Vachon caramel cakes
    Snack: yogurt topped with Honey Bunches of Oats cereal
    Snack: Nature Valley peanut granola bar
    M3: leftover chicken & potato casserole, broccolini
    WTH happened? All those snacks?  I wasn't even hungry.  Napped mid afternoon because I was falling asleep at my desk, woke up and started to snack.  No explanation, but I'm throwing some serious shade at my dragon right now  
  23. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in Kirbz's Whole30 Log   
    So you had pb, rice and dairy for dinner?  Sounds delish.  I bet it was fun. 
    Seriously though, you are doing great! Reading about your "leading with curiosity" approach, I think you have a good grip on things.  You are bringing yourself back to eating well.  You are here, posting and committing.  
  24. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from RachelR in Kirbz's Whole30 Log   
    "Mama always told me not to look into the eyes of the sun,
    But Mama, that's where the fun is" (- Springsteen, Blinded by the Light)
    Don't do it Kirbz.  Don't look into the light.  You've come too far. 
    I hope that you do get to enjoy ice cream, but on your terms.  Maybe have a friend over.  Make it an occasion.  Or do some baking but give it away.  Last week I spoke with someone who recently bought a Kitchen Aid stand mixer, now she and her boyfriend make cookies on the weekends to give them away to friends and neighbours.  That solves the desire to bake and adds a social aspect to eating "treats."
    Just make sure you've done your reintroductions first...
    Wishing you strength
     
  25. Like
    ShadowInTheKitchen got a reaction from MadyVanilla in Shadow’s May 2020 Whole30   
    Post Whole 3o Day? Tuesday June 30
    M1: greens, eggs, and ham (broccoli, 2 eggs over easy fried in ghee, prosciutto pan fried til hot)
    Snack: cookie dough
    M2: my favourite green salad with avocado and chicken
    Snack: cookie dough
    M3: spaghetti squash with compliant Kirkland marinara sauce, 1 Greenfields non-compliant cheddar sausage (dairy & sugar)
    According to MyFitnessPal, if it wasn't for that cookie dough I would be down another 5 lbs if I eat like this every day over the next 5 weeks.  I know why I made the cookie dough, it was because I didn't have anything ready to eat in the fridge.  I can whip up cookie dough in 90 seconds flat, but why?  I didn't even like it very much anyore, and I feel blergh right now - no surprise there.  I would have eaten anything else if it was just ready to grab and go. 
    I am out of sorts in many ways.  My sleep hasn't been great.  I feel snitty.  My 17 yo daughter asked me today when did I start swearing?  Yup, I don't normally swear, but these past few days the *!#!*'s have been flying around here, and there is no good reason for it.  What the heck?  More importantly, what to do?
    I have decided that I am going to sign off for now.  I logged consistently almost every day for two months.  I feel I have the basics down to eat Whole30 most of the time.  I don't beat myself up if I go off plan, unless it is something supremely stupid like making cookie dough and then eating a sh!t load of it. That is an old habit, and it's time to bury it deeper this time.  I'm going to stop logging for a bit, and the time I save from logging and journaling will go towards meal planning and trying some new recipes.  Tomorrow is a new day, a new month.  I'm planning to start the day by going to Mass at my church (Canada Day here), something I have been missing terribly since the lockdowns.  Work has been extremely busy and I am feeling swamped, so want to fix that up too.  My house is not as clean and tidy as I like, which also affects my mood.  I will try to eat as close to Whole30 as possible, as often as I can, and try to keep away from sugar, or at least if I have sugar I want to plan it and look forward to it.  I am also unplugging from social media, hopefully for the month but not sure if that's realistic.  A week anyways.  
    I hope to get back to myself soon.  Even before I began W30 at the beginning of May I wasn't like this.  I'm going to concentrate on eating clean, keeping my house and fridge organized, and learning to cook some new recipes - a goal I had from early on in my journey.  I also had a goal to be able to prep W30/clean meals quickly without too much fuss, and today's foray into the baking cupboard for the butter, flour, sugar and chocolate chips just proves that I'm not where I want to be - yet.  
    I'd like to give a HUGE shout out to everyone who posted their struggles and their victories.  It's been helpful knowing that I'm not alone in this.  I will miss keeping up with you all, but know that I am wishing you success, every. single. day.  Fare well everyone.  I will be absent for a while, keeping on keeping on - I hope, as will you too. 
    Wishing you a happy summer, filled with more nsv's than you can imagine.  
    Sincerely,
    Shadow