Rae l

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  1. Rae l

    My Mother

    I believe society has conditioned us that all mothers are angels and such selfless givers. It's considered sacriledge to bag on your moms. But in reality, moms can truly be toxic. There is also now very well documented issues mothers have with daughters. My mother used to tell me when I was younger to do good in school because I was ugly and how she was skinnier than me when she was my age. She fed us crap too. I bloomed in my early 20s and she was just so proud then. I am grateful I haven't seen her in four years because being perimenopausal caused some weight gain. I don't want my husband to go to jail for knocking her out because she can't resist bashing on me in public. I don't care anymore. I just tell people my mother is a monster. I'm grateful my friends' mothers were there when I was growing up.
  2. Rae l

    Feeling horrible and embarassed

    Oh boy. I wish I could give you a hug. And say a few things to your parents and in laws. Why does it seem that people in general have lost their decency filter? I mean seriously, how about trying to be nice, thoughtful, caring and kind or shut up if you can't? My mother sucks. She lies, manipulates and is just downright toxic. Always has been. I just spent a good 2+ years of not speaking with her. And she has my brothers not speaking to me either. She tells people I did good in school to make them look bad, that I am not on blood thinners, cholesterol meds, and high blood pressure meds because I have "different genes" than her and my brothers That to get my brothers in my good graces after her lies and manipulations, I need to apologize for crap from when I was a toddler. Absolutely insane and toxic. My mother in law is crazy and passive aggressive. One thing I have done is told my husband NOT to tell people I am on a diet. Don't say anything. If they ask, I just say I don't eat this or that because I don't LIKE it. I am super fortunate to have a few of Whole 30 fans at work. I don't know how you continue to go the beach. I would not go there at all. I do believe stress causes inflamation and just weakens you. I tore a muscle and was physically out of it when I went through a bad time. Cortisol is a hormone affected by stress and causes weight issues. 4 years ago, I weighed 120 lbs. Prior to doing a Whole 30 around 2 months ago, I was at 150. Now this may not sound like a lot to some, but I am 5'1" and generally petite. My husband said to me at the time, I still think you are beautiful. i told him, I am doing this because I just want to feel better. I don't feel good in my skin. I was having hot flashes, not resting and my eyes were not clear. I was having cravings mid afternoon where I felt like I could gnaw off a limb if there was some honey or sugar on it. Giving into that craving (from the vending machine, not my arm) caused me to crash and my drive home from work got scary when I felt I could just go to sleep. I was having nightmares that I did that. I didn't do the whole 30 for weight but it would have been nice to see more than 8 pounds drop in 6 weeks after I increased my exercise. But I am feeling so much better. One thing I would take advantage of if they still give you a hard time is tell them your diet is dictated by your doctor. Tell them you'll listen to them after they complete the 10+ years of college and get so many years of experience being a doctor. I tell my mother that when she starts talking about what medications people should be on. Her edcuation didn't go past high school. Be strong! And thanks for the information on the effects of coffee. I was under the impression it was okay if it was black. In your honor and by default, my body's, I am going to attempt to cut it out a week from now!
  3. In a strange way, I'm grateful now. I really enjoy what I'm eating. There have been around 2-3 days where i don't feel like cooking but I tuned into my feelings and it has a lot to do with my appetite. To have that challenge really helped me when travelling. To make it personal really inspired me to stick with it. And also no more vacations with the inlaws. 6 months back, we did Vegas with them. I told my husband, I don't mind visiting there but no traveling. My goal is to not have to take anything supplemental. I am completely off black cohash which I was taking in the evening because I had the worse night sweats and the doc confirmed I was perimenopausal. I have been for two years. I now get the chills I used to get when I was younger. I'd like to not have to take any fish oil for Omega 3s. And I'm not longer taking melatonin to sleep. I am sleeping so much better. So hopefully, after my followup, my blood work shows my doc. She's very curious. I have found a great motivator for me is reading about health. Everywhere you look,eating well includes something just like this (protein, fat, veggies). It is affirming. I find it strange that others find this is not eating "normal". Eating processed food made with chemicals is what is not normal. But in terms of what the general population consumes, this is now off the beaten path. Which is sad. Thanks everyone for the support and this forum. I have learned so much from others here.
  4. So I did it! And it wasn't really that bad. I did fall off the wagon on cigarettes which really ticks me off after my Whole 30. I own that but timeing just wasn't good any way around and had to schedule it with the Whole 30 commencing as my inlaws came into town. My M-i-L is a mess. She is very paranoid about her brain function and is on this very intense supplementation regimine. We are talking a good 40-60 pills a day. I'm a pretty good cook and hearing the constant banter of what she takes and such and how she doens't like this or that, I thought, hey, here's to a glass of wine. My first in 30 days. Good red wine. Naturally occuring sulfites! Yeah! Not so fast. Before my head even hit the pillow I had the worst headache I've had in a long while. It totally sucked. We then go on a road trip for 4 hours to visit his brother. She's also very passive aggressive and I broke and had a smoke. On day 2 post Whole 30. I had quit cold turkey and am just so mad at myself for being week. The next day, after hubby takes them around town, she comes back with groceries. All this processed crap like grain chips, "health bars", sugar drenched coconut creamer, etc. As a gift. AFTER I told her I have stopped using cream in my coffee and I pretty much avoid even prior to the Whole 30, packed food. Then we are asked to pick up desert. I pick up some fruit and some Le Croix prior to going to the bakery for others. She's right with me and starts to have issues when I grabbled a cake I know my nieces love. Hearing someone lecture me about the food dye in a red velvet cake I picked out for my nieces just made me snap. This is coming from someone who takes extreme pills and medication for the remote possibility of getting Alzheimers. She is worried because she never knew one of her real parents. Of all the things. After a doctor lectured her about the strain of what all that puts on the kidney and livers, she added supplements for those too because she "hates" veggies. Blatantly ignoring me and making passive aggressive digs about how I didn't lose a lot of weight for taking such "drastic measures" without being able to turn up the snark completely sucked. Seriously, I'm drastic for tryiing to eat healthy compared to someone who has to take a boatload of supplements against of the advice of a doctor because she eats like crap. The other half has aggreed we no longer travel with his parents. If he wants, fine, but I won't go. And I'll take a trip on my own. Which means it will cost twice as much. And he certainly likes my company better than riding the crazy train. We then got an email notifiying us of a supplement delivery. I'm sorry, but I do not appreciate anyone undermine how I provide good, wholesome food to myself and my husband. BUT, here is the plus. See, having someone blatantly disrespect my conscious choices, firmed up my conviction. I was almost very happy to note the bloat from having two small bites of cake. Or the acid from a sip of a margarita jacked up with super sweet margarita mixes. I could only imagine. how much worse I would have felt had I consumed a whole portion. Being on the road really and having them pick out crap restaurants, really made me miss with a vengeance some of the amazing recipes I've used with my kitchen., I have also noticed that eating 3 full meals at this moment is way too much. I'm going to start working out a lot more and hope to see this change. But in the evening, I'm happy with some protein (usually around 2-3 oz of fish or meat and small salad with veggies.) I'm just very satisfied. My typical day starts with egg or chicken, an avocado, and tomatoes, cukes, and/or bell pepper. By the time lunch is over, I've had a good 7-9 portions of veggies. I don't know if my appetite is lower at days end because I'm nutritionally satiated. But after reading through "It Starts With Food", I believe my appetite has changed because of all the nutrition I'm packing into my body. Regardless, the plus side of my annoyances discussed, was such a powerful confirmation of what the Whole 30 did for me and how much more I love good, healthy food. In the meantime, here's to hoping my coworkers snap up all that crap she stuffed into the pantry I worked hard at organizing. And here's to not being stressed to smoke until the habit is kicked for good. I buried the pack that was half full in my garden in a container to make the whole giving in more difficult.
  5. I occasionally drank coffee with that sweetened CoffeeMate stuff but, had a Red Bull, EVERY WEEK DAY. I replaced my Red Bull (daily) with an 8oz black coffee. And surprise, surprise, I LOVE plain, black coffee. I can pick up the notes in it and it helped ease off the caffeine and move into having a cup 2-3 times a week. The other half is moving in that direction too!
  6. Rae l

    Whole30 cheats?

    I totally notice that too! I make these tuna cakes from a recipe I got from NomNom and it is off the chain. She uses mashed sweet potato as a binder and cut jalepeno. There is this sweet & spice in every bite that is out of this world. I am absolutely adoring teas. I had too really lean that way. I had replaced my am red bull with coffee, black. And I actually love it. I loved it so much for a few days I caught myself drinking two cups. I can really taste all the notes like with wine. Before, all the crap I put in the coffee covered that up. The teas helped and when I run out, I'm going to try to find some decent decaf! .
  7. Rae l

    Whole30 cheats?

    I've had a lot of luck with teas. I'm entering my 18th day and I have to say, so many things taste so amazing. Anything sweet is almost too sweet now.
  8. Rae l

    Had it easy and now this?!

    My husband has ours in the bathroom. I have to admit, day 9 and if my doc calls about possibly high cholesterol and hormones (just got physical and mid 40s, haven't had a period in 3 months), I'm going to step on it to give her weight if she calls and wants to put me on pills and ask for a follow up at the end of the 30 days. I never cared about the number. I just want to get back into my jeans without feeling so bloated and the scale doesn't always match how they fit! And hoping to kill the hot flashes. And just feel awesome. In my 20s, I ate very similar to paleo. 25 years later, I don't feel good in my skin. So luckily, hubby says he'll eat whatever I am. I have had no symptoms (planned it for the date when he left for a week just in case) and he got back Sunday. He's the one getting headaches, bad cramps, frequent bathroom trips. The only issue I've had is a sweet craving (which is weird). So I ate some extra berries. And I've discovered that I really like my coffee strong, dark and unsweet and having a cup every other day or so eased me very nicely off the daily Red Bull. But the food recipes out there are awesome. I do miss my glass of wine and will miss the bimonthly desert we indulged in. But it's all about the fruit if that tempts me to crash. I've enjoyed lurking and reading everyone's tips and advice. Good luck! And thanks.
  9. I don't need to buy this doctor's program. I may just because knowledge is power and it will help get the hubby to do the Whole30 with me. I feel sneaky...He hates even a cigarette a day.. (likes his cigars though) but I used that as a motivater! So sorry to not quote the numerous message board links but wow...you all are awesome. January...here we come. Win win, win win!
  10. Did the video...40n minutes vs the 20 minutes. Loved the info. Easy sell after him embracing the common sense. http://w3.newsmax.com/newsletters/brownstein/video_cancer_prevention.cfm?promo_code=14D15-1 Here are notes that I emailed. Things are missing because I did not purchase the whole shebang. But...totally fits with the logic of this plan! I was able to get the buy-in...honey, it will help me quit smoking...but I travel...do it at home...defeats the purpose...Baby...let's do this...30 days is not that much of a big deal! He even almost put up my clean lung exray...such a weird thing! Soooo...here is the video he saw...we did not sign up for nada, especially after discussing the prospect and coindidently buying the book here! http://w3.newsmax.com/newsletters/brownstein/video_cancer_prevention.cfm?promo_code=14D15-1 [quote/}My notes after 40 minutes! 5 causes to cause cancer 1. You are deficient or imbalanced in key nutrients and hormones. 2. You are overweight or obese. 3. You smoke or chew tobacco. 4. You eat too many refined sugars and grains. 5. You're ingesting toxins in your food, water, air and medicines. 7 steps to cancer preventions 1. Don't smoke 2. Maintain adequate iodine levels 3. Avoid Synthetic Chemicals and GMOs in Your Foods...he promotes red meat that is organic 4. Avoid refined sugars, salts, flours, and oils 5. Avoid and Remove Toxic Metals From Your Body (mercury, lead, arsenic, caladium, mercury (biggest problem...vaccinations?), (fatigue, flus, colds, allergies, rashes, and infections or suppressed immune systems will be worse and cause autoimmune disorders, Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, liver damage, and cancer are signs of too much metals) 6. Five dangerous foods 1. Soy foods, except fermented soy found in miso and tempeh....edamame and soy milk is harmful...50% of packaged foods contain non-fermented soy 2. Artificial sweeteners 3. Refined carbohydrate foods 4. Soybean foods...non fermented soy foods..edamame! Really? It seems natural!! 5. Iodized salt...vs bromine replacement in breads. bromine inhibits iodine absorption. FDA sets iodine needs to low. Bromide used in outside sources. promotes apostosis...natural cell breakdown 95% are deficient in iodine fake sugars inhibit iodine absorption...aspartame is thought to cause brain cancer Pure organic stevia (no additives), organic coconut crystals or natural, raw honey Avoid white table sugar, refined table salt, no bleached salt (kosher?), Acid vs Alkaline, ph 7.4 ideal? Cancer loves acidic pH bad oils...canola, soybean, cottonseed...partially hydrogenated....and OF COURSE, margarine...roaches won't even eat it and it is a molecule or two away from plastic! organic butter, coconut oil (perfect foods), and cold pressed olive oil Avoid refined sugars, natural sugars Yams vs white potatoes...yams = yays Oatmeal, nuts and organic whole grain flours that have not been bromated Organic produce, refined and processed oils Most doctors will NOT test for metal and if they do, they can only be removed by chelation therapy (have seen this spelled kelation) or chelating nutritional supplements. Bad thing...it is not tested or treated. Get the lead out! Need access to a holistic doctor or supplements This doctor discusses how cholesterol is over rated. Statin drugs will not help. Arthritis...some forms are caused by bacterial infection that can be treated with antibiotics. All others are caused by refined sugars and inflammation-causuing ingredients in processed foods. Depression is caused by chemical imbalance that can be corrected with Antidepressant drugs. Get rid of toxic foods, balance hormones, get exercise, and take specific supplements. PAT and CAT scans expose big time radiation Iodine, Magnesium, Vitamin C, Vitamin B12, Vitamin B1 (thiamin), Vitamin D, Chromium, Sulfer, Zinc, Potassium [quote}
  11. I get the chew thing. I actually eat a lot less after learning to thoroughly chewing my food. I've been adverse to meds/pills/etc for quite some years. I have a pretty hard time accepting good vitamins replace real foods. Doesn't follow common sense. But...I also found during more "dormant" times...I needed less calories. A blood tests showed I needed more vegetables. Then...it took me hitting my early 40s to feel the crippling effects of real depression. It's too personal for him and myself to get into but let's just say we prevailed. It took prayer, love, support, and...nutrition. Hence the smoothies were vital for a spell. We are in a great place now (he worries and mistakes my contentment.) I can go there with the rules. Maybe I'll take my salad greens and blend his. Seriously...in over 45 years, he said it's the first time he likes "veggies" without cheese and butter. I also sneak flax seeds in there. He even eats fresh sliced bell peppers, homemade hummus, and other raw veggies with me. I know I'll have to give up the yogurt ranch and beans...that's fine. I think my biggest "I will miss but will return" is my Yogi Egyptian Licorice tea...has Stevia leaves. But it's doable....not an everyday thing. Interestingly enough, he sent me a link he watched today regarding cancer and how our body is exposed to it and it is the food that either feeds it or fights it. Ta Da!! I discussed the Whole30 with him. He said he'd be interested but to show him the book. I need to call Apple because I haven't figured out how to share books I buy via iBooks with my family. But he sounds open to it! I think with reading the basics and some of the book (so logical BTW), it will be an easy sell. He said it may be good for him after Christmas which is so realistic! So very stoked!! Also, he wasn't feeling well tonight.. He is a pretty healthy dude but. the new job, traveling every week, and I think exposure to others have gotten to him. I made him chamomile, made him a bath, and rubbed his back...he was achy. He took some zinc and an EmergenC. Surprisingly, he turned down Nightquil at first because "of the chemicals". He woke up and I did push it on him because he sleeps light and it's not like it's a common think. That or a glass of his expensive once in a blue moon fine scotch. I won and he's sleeping. He will cancel work travel tomorrow if not better...chicken soup all the way. I read up some more and someone here mentioned Carr's book on quitting smoking. I counted and I smoked 5 times today...meaning I didn't make it through two cigarettes. I am hoping that the detox I think I'll get from the other stuff will help clear that issue. I have a two month supply of a low dose patch but did not like the rush I got from them. I think it makes a lot of sense though to quit this and wish a nic supplement would work but it may be too much. Regarding black cohosh...I was taking Estroven and quit for 3 weeks. I believe it was Tom, a senior poster here, said we don't necessarily feel supplemental benefits all the time so it's hard to tell if they help. We'll let me just say...they helped. I don't live in Utah anymore, but when you break out in sweats when it's snowing there and your wearing a light sweater (after living most of your life in South Florida)...big issue. I take that and a Vitamin D/calcium supplement (no bad ingredients) but that is it during off allergen season. It would be amazing to not need these and hope I find the culprits. I also need to research coffee that is flavored at the bean level for his sake. That will be tough but I've won other battles so doable. I just think this is such an important endeavor. I want to do this right. I want my pantry and fridge to be a conflict free zone for me and him. It's such a big deal for everyone we love, including ourselves, to be healthy. I shine on the outside but want to feel that way on the inside. I will not accept when people say I'm just aging and to so it gracefully. I want to feel good! I want my love to feel good about himself. I've already learned so much here...the group and members are amazing. The stories are amazing testimonies! Again, thanks for listening.
  12. Point 4...meant to say she doesn't get her celiac sub ingredients cause reactions. My pantry includes spices and Italian tomatoes with my olives and yummy picked stuff!
  13. Hi everyone! So, I have been reading all over this site. I was looking for healthier recipes and a blogger mentioned this site. As I am on my iPad, I promise to credit her in a comment. I am 5'2", weight...not sure but go by clothes...fluctuate between US size 2-4...depends on vanity sizing! Here is some history and "current" facts. I am 43. I have not had major health issues in my life except for allergies to pollen and cat dander. I've combatted here and there by taking local honey and Singular during "ragweed" season. The singular was literally life saving as I thought I was treating what I thought was sinus issues and dried myself out. However, my husband wasn't allowed to try this because it was prohibited based on military restrictions for pilots. In my very early 20s, I was diagnosed with a high cholesterol count. I was told this may be hereditary and it was confirmed. At the time, I read "Fit for Life" by the Diamonds and learned a LOT. I know they have adjusted but I learned to live without meat everyday...even while working at a steakhouse. I learned about food "combining" (no hard starch with protein, body cycles, etc). I was on a role. My mornings started with fruit like grapefruit, apples, and bananas (only once a week) and a V8 juice. I hate heavy at lunch and dinner was energy. I ate pasta for energy during long shifts...with sauce on side for dipping. Bottom, I was good...and it was easy because I was the poor college student. I even effortlessly dropped major weight from 150lbs to 103lbs...with shock!! Oh, I was asked by my doc to stop caffeine. And warned against initial headaches. But I did it. Coke was treated as a dessert that was savored, not a beverage. But during this time, my craving became "pure" and I loved craving pure and healthy thing. I even spent 3 years without touching a drink except wine to complement a meal. Then life creeped up. I started to smoke. Very bad. [email protected] 3 cigs a day. Have patches when I plan to go pure...another reason I am attracted to this. Flash forward...I dated. I worked with chefs. I love pure ingredients. Fried food..,I can have a fry or two....love it...then I feel the grease in my mouth and stop. Every thing was a taste only. I met my husband and dining out and putting my culinary skills to the test became my thing. I love pure ingredients and am a huge advocate of shopping the outer isles. Cooking with wine and clarified butter...no issue. But..,age creeps in. I got married and we love dining out...with good food. I used my training from chefs and cooked amazing meals that would even fit this plan with very few exceptions. I am blessed with good skin to a point. I noticed my farsightedness was starting to show. I also started getting night sweats. I thought it was our tempurpedic mattress. But when I started having flashes of heat...I freaked! I thought menopause meant no more menstrual cycle and then this happened. Every article discusses the superficial (IMO) effects life wrinkles, slower metabolism, and fading eyesight. To top this off...my husband and I went through a very horrible time. I say this because it's relevant...I had a breakdown. It's pretty amazing how stress affects your physical being. I tried to self medicate with alcohol...not conducive. Doctor tried Zoloft because it was "mild". A week on half the dose and a week on a full dose...destroyed me. It destroyed my whole gastric system and it took me over two months to recover from. At the same time...to add to my dismay, my mother and brothers deserted me. My 3 weeks of self escape got me labeled as an alcoholic and blaming this for my "health" issues that made my husband and myself put a stop to their years of "verbal abuse". They are all on maintenance drugs...high blood pressure, cholesterol minimization drugs and low sodium foods. I'm the eldest child and have always been labeled as a fad "dieter" because of stuff I avoided and also paid attention to. And also my aversion to pills to allow indulgence In bad foods. So naturally, my wanting to blank out with too much beer or wine...very fun for them. NOW I have downloaded the book. Hubby is being swayed. Getting back to health for both of us as a couple has been instrumental. I love variety. Hubby is okay with the same thing everyday. Another caveat...I have read the site and completely get what you're saying. I like variety so no biggie but...here are my questions. 1. Don't need or want smoothies every day. Don't want to cook spinach, kale and dandelion greens either. The small part apple and berries (sometime I sneak in broccoli) get him eating veggies without cheese! If this is a once a week thing, where I don't psychologically see this as a replacement, is this okay? Our docs want us to incorporate vitamin k and these are supposedly the best. 2. Hot flashes...staying natural. I tried Estroven. Was awesome. After stress made hair thin and nails fall off, the multi was awesome. Research showed Black Cohosh was the key. The only supplements I want to continue. It's really embarrassing pulling out a fan. The night sweats hurt my sleep. I wouldn't even mind trying to drop this for a couple of weeks to see if this Whole30 eliminates this. I just can't find feedback. The burning up at night and randomly burn have been horrible. 3. My sweet tooth...I'm not a slave to that. In fact...sugar shocks my tongue and taste buds. At most, I am a slave to the "I am here Honey...come love me...I'm on the shelf losing my purity...you don't want me to go bad". But my guy...I need to keep that around. I do little things...purée frozen bananas with pure cocoa. To him...chocolate banana ice cream. He'd be suspicious if I didn't have a bite or two. I've convinced him to get away from artificial sweeteners but now I'd have to say to him...no Stevia...natural, real Stevia. BTW, it became easier when his best friend needed a kidney and he became a match. He's on standby...and no more diet soda! Convincing him for him though...not good. I was even making him green tea fruit Popsicles with fruit...with spearmint and stevia leaves. He's also furious with my family and is very sensitive that I may be leaning this way even to keep them happy even though that's silly...for years I've been accused of being stuffy with food. Not true...just want to be healthy! 4. Finally, besides those issues...no biggie. I get the whole concept. I will have to make only a few adjustments. I will do this post holiday but work my way into this. My stepson is very hypoallergenic. I wish he had more time with us. Ironically...his mom and stepdad are very know it alls and she is celiac. Sashes doesn't get her subs bring in nut allergies which lead me me to my ultimate question....peanuts are legumes. Why is that type of allergy grouped with real nuts? It doesn't make sense. Thanks everyone. I'm very excited to do this. I am very excited to also "sneak" this stuff into my guy's eating habits. I am very cool with adjustments and I'm not trying to make excuses. It is for him as well as me and fighting Father Time. He's getting there and I think over the holidays I will be able to have him in full up except for these few exceptions. He already sees good skin with pure veggies...via smoothies. I see relief with black cohosh...I don't want hormones. Provided I regulate these things to make this about "us" and not "me", I think I can get a twofer. Regarding the Cohosh and others subs continuing...does anyone have other comments? (Btw...in two months have gotten pretzels, saltines, rice and flour pizza out of his stomach.). Biggest challenge will be cheese for him. Me...loving the ramp up to purity. Shoot away Rock stars! You all are very inspiring and already sent this book after two chapters to five friends. I am psyched to "reverse" age as my friend is calling this!