chillyjilly

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    41
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About chillyjilly

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  • Birthday 02/04/1953

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    new orleans
  • Interests
    gardening, exercise, classic old movies
  1. chillyjilly

    Help!!!!! I can't even see the wagon

    I started my whole 30 again on the anniversary of my last one completed a year ago. It has been a week and I feel so much better mentally. I too struggled with should I ....shouldn't I,.... I just couldn't get motivated again I had fallen off the wagon so hard and felt really depressed for months. .I went to this forum and started reading some of the postings, got a wee bit motivated. Next I pulled out the Whole 30 book and looked at the easy recipes again. I went to the grocery ,bought the food I needed, wasn't expensive this second time around and cooked a whole 30 meal for dinner that night. I know it sounds crazy but I really feel the difference since I am back on it. I cannot deviate. I'm an all or nothing girl as well. Keep reading the postings and something will click
  2. chillyjilly

    Have I erased all the good I did?

    Thank you for this forum.. I completed my whole 30 successfully the previous May. Last January I went completely off the tracks and have felt so bad about myself. I really feel horrible now and I am going to start the program again today. I don't have to tell you all how awful I feel about my self, both physically and emotionally. I am such a food addict and I have such shame associated with it. After reading the posts on this subject I feel hopeful and the camaraderie. I will be glued to these posts for now to help me get through this. I have faith that ultimitely I will feel good again if I stick to the program
  3. chillyjilly

    Embarassed

    so the sugar dragon won yesterday and I spiraled pretty far down and of course felt physically ill. I think I hit rock bottom, and today I DO NOT want to say I'm "starting over". It sounds to me, negative like I failed.. I want to begin the program today. It sounds more positive for me. The main thing for me is to make sure I don't get hungry and start foraging for non compliant food. Later, alligator
  4. chillyjilly

    Embarassed

    Hey everyone, I am so glad you all posted. I am trying to start my second Whole 30 program today!!!!!!! I too have struggled with starting and stopping. Everything in the article that the moderator GFChris told us to read really spoke to me. Completing the 1st Whole 30 program was such a positive experience for me back in May, I don't have to tell you all how it added to my well being. Please keep posting your struggles as well as your advice as this forum is the reason I got through the first one. I am looking forward to the next 30 days, my sugar dragon is trying to take over as I am writing this
  5. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Yeah we are done, but I pigged out a little with peanut butter on a slice of homemade bread. I couldn't help myself, I tripped and my mouth fell on the slice of bread with the peanut butter. I decided I am going to continue the whole 30 into more time. I can see how I am easily not ready to get off the wagon and I can slip back into old habits. Luckily I was able to stop after the bread and a few mouthfuls of chicken with non compliant bbq sauce. Oh yeah about 10 small famous amos cookies. I refuse to feel like a failure for doing exactly what they said not to do on the 30th day email. I effed up but I put my big girl panties on,brushed myself off and am beginning again NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I learned I am just not ready to do it on my own for now I too am wondering where do we post ?
  6. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    OMG, you guys are so great. I love reading your posts, I love the whinning, the debbie downing, the "kvetching". It is so real and we all seem to be going through it at the same time. GIRL POWER!!!!!!!!!!! What I noticed even though we have all these negative thoughts, we are still willing to be as "compliant" (sick of the word as well) as possible. Went to a wedding last night and ate what was good for me and focused on "sober dancing" everyone posting seems to be choosing healthy, even though you think you are miserable. Just think how bad it would be if you binged out. Okay "Pollyanna" will stop speaking
  7. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Okay here I go again, I promise the last for today. I finally figured out how to post a picture...YEAH!!!!!!!!! More important I took the plunge and listed my age. I was hesitant when I first joined as I was fearful that you all would think I am too old and not take me serious, (is that even grammatically correct)? I feel as if I'm still 17 inside so I really don't relate to being 62, it sounds ancient. Lastly I changed my user name from jhalpern2 to chillyjilly. Just trying to keep it real
  8. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Okay guys, I'm starting to stress out a little bit and need to vent, cause I just want to binge eat so I don't have to think of all the stresses. I know it does not compare to other people's problems, but stress is stress. my 23 yr old daughter is coming home to visit and bringing her boyfriend in a week. He's a great guy, but he's never been here before and of course I see all the yucky things in my house. My husband is turning 60 at the same time and I'm trying to have something special for him Lastly and I think this really is the one that stresses me out if truth be told. I'm cleaning out my closet today and looking at clothes I use to wear 20 years ago and see how cute and little they are. I have lost a lot of weight and feel really good about myself, but then when I see how much bigger I am than those clothes, it drives me to want to fall into the solace of food.. I haven't been this tempted since I started May 1st, so this is a tough one, but I am just going to breathe with it and believe I can conquer this... Thank you guys for being there and knowing what I am going through
  9. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Day 28, last night for the first time I had a dream about packaged cookies. That isn't even my trigger food, very interesting. I am noticing the difference between true hunger and eating out of emotion. Yesterday I found myself wanting to eat out of emotion for the first time since I started the program. Funny how it is coming out at the end.
  10. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    thank you ShannonM816 for the link to the babaganosh, I am going to try it. This afternoon I tried the recipe for ketchup from "WELL FED 2", called "Kickass Ketchup", we are having hamburgers tonight and I wanted to be able to put ketchup on mine. Naturally I won't use a bun but will "dress it" as we say here in the south between 2 large lettuce leaves. It is not bad, of course not Heinz ketchup, which I used to put on corn, potatoes, any thing. I'm so trash!!!!! Anyway it is not too bad, I would probably not use the cinnamon, cloves and allspice in the recipe next time. Today is Day 27 and I feel good, I am going to extend my 30 days and I am going to try not to weigh myself. The scale is such a trigger for me and affects my feelings about myself. My clothes fit looser, that is good for me. I asked my husband if I looked different since I started the program and typical him said "I looked less sugary" A friend of mine told me this morning that she did not recognize me at the gym. She said my body looks different.. We can do this, I like this program
  11. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Today is Day 25, and this weekend was a 2 day holiday where the menu for food was focused on dairy at my synagogue. I made sure I ate something compliant at home before I left. When I scouted the food at the banquet I saw I could not eat anything but the fruit. I was looking at the homemade rugelach, which is a pasty and drooled all over myself. The old me would have stuffed them in my pockets and have one in each hand, as well as one in my mouth....That was very rewarding for me to "win that battle and live to tell the tale." I couldn't have the salad as there was feta cheese and dressing mixed all over it, and the rest as I said before was all dairy dishes. The next day I made it a point to go into the kitchen of the reception and scoop out salad before the caterer put on the dressing. Then I put on oil and vinegar and was able to eat along with every one else with out all the question as the night before
  12. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Amandamarievth, would love your baba ganoush recipe or where to find it...thxs
  13. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    I ate kelp noodles tonight with cooked down eggplant, tomatoes, onions and garlic. I liked the kelp noodles, a little salty, but interesting to try. I am going to go past the may 30 and slip into next month. I like how I feel. I need the boundaries still.
  14. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Today is Day 21, and like the late great James Brown said...."I feel good...dunuanana, like I know that I should" I am craving tofu right now, I am not a vegetarian, but still am craving it, maybe it's because I know I can't have it. Anyway I have read the info about the lectins in soybeans and why they are not good, especially the estrogen for women. I also read on a Whole 9 posting that if you are peri menopausal it won't affect you. Since I am post menopausal should this be the same? looking forward to hear your thoughts on this
  15. chillyjilly

    Spring into May Whole 30!

    Hey Mrs Amanda, you are doing so amazing.. My goodness you have 5 kids and 3 are sick....When my kids were small, I was always tired and felt like I was a hamster running on a wheel. I promise you it does get better. Try to keep your meals real simple. You are not cooking for a contest or for a restaurant. Sometimes I too get a little bogged down with the meal planning, just be simple, because you are teaching your family that food is not the focus of their life. I wanted to post about last night where I went to a reception with lots of food..... I made sure I wasn't the first at the buffet table, and sat down at the farthest place from it. Before the program I would have focused entirely on the spread. In fact I made it a point to engage in conversation with the people around me. I focused on them and not stuffing my mouth with as much food as I could get in. That in itself was incredibly rewarding, just "being" with someone else other than myself. I did look at the homemade cookies and it was very tough.......Here's the thing, I wrote about this earlier in another thread, I am very scared about what will happen to me when I end the program. I am such a food addict, I am worried I will go off the deep end, and not be able to limit my quantity. I am on Day 20 and feel wonderful