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Found 9 results

  1. Hi all, I'm on day 7 of my second Whole30, and it's becoming pretty clear to me that I'm not doing this for the right reasons. As background, I have a history of pretty severe eating disorders (anorexia and bulimia through all of my teenage years--I'm 24 now) and have considered myself pretty much recovered for the past 4-ish years. However, I've definitely noticed some (by my assessment) pretty garden-variety disordered eating tendencies in the past year: restricting my calories a bit, but not to particularly unhealthy levels, feeling a little compulsive about exercising but not overdoing it by any objective standards, &c. I started this Whole30 partly because I had been eating junk throughout the holidays and my sugar dragon was in full force, but, if I'm being honest with myself, my primary motivation was to lose the couple pounds I had gained over the past few weeks. I recently lost a fair amount of weight due to loss of appetite after a bad breakup and was hovering a little above the underweight mark, and I was feeling uncomfortable after gaining 3-ish pounds. I know that the Whole30 is not intended to be a weight loss program by any means, but I've definitely been using it that way this time around: I've been weighing myself, which I know is totally against the rules, and counting (and restricting) calories, which I know is strongly discouraged. I'm also running 30 miles a week, which is normal for me, but I'm aware that I'm consciously undereating based on my activity level. Given all of that, I'm having some serious doubts about whether I should continue this Whole30. I'm clearly not doing this right--or for the right reasons--at the moment, but I'm not sure whether it's better to stick with it and try to work on my relationship with food while on the Whole30, or whether I should stop doing this and take some time to work on these issues in a different way. I've read the "Dear Melissa" piece about doing the Whole30 when you have a history of eating disorders, but I'm still at a loss about what I should do. On the one hand, I'm getting the sense that this might not be the best thing for me, at least at this time; on the other hand, I feel pretty guilty and anxious at the idea of not finishing this. I'd really appreciate hearing from people who have experienced something like this before, or any thoughts or advice that any of you might have.
  2. Hello everyone! I've almost completed a Whole30 before (made it to day 25!) and I would like to give it a second shot and do it the proper way this time. My first Whole30 attempt involved a lot of overeating of compliant foods. I don't know why I feel the urge to eat so much. I don't know if it's an actual hunger or if it's just because I have cravings for sugar and I can't satisfy them. I have a history with eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, binge eating; in that order) and I am really hoping that Whole30 helps me improve my relationship with food. My struggles are mostly with sugar, it's my kryptonite. When I was struggling with anorexia and bulimia, I wouldn't allow myself desserts or sweets, and now it seems like I have no control over myself when it comes to it. It's like I restricted so much that I literally FEAR not allowing myself to have it. But it's only with sugar. I'm only 18 (19 in a few days) and I've struggled with some sort of ED since I was 15 (probably even before that), I'm just looking for some way to finally improve my relationship with food and not need/want it for any reason other than FUEL for my body. I turned to the Whole30 not only to help with my relationship with food, but to also help me discover my food intolerances and help heal my digestive system. My eating disorders completely messed up my digestive system and I seem to have some sort of negative reaction to almost EVERY food I put into my body. I'm hear asking for advice.... and guidance, I suppose. Do you think Whole30 is the right plan for me? How do I overcome the urge to binge on compliant foods and just food in general? Does anyone else struggle with the same thing? How do I finally learn that I don't need sugar in order to have a happy life? Should I do a Whole30 for longer than 30 days? I'm not sure if this is the right forum, or if anyone here can even help me, but I figured I'd give it a shot. So thank you in advance!
  3. Hi, I'm Barb and I was a Whole 30 success story back in 2015. I dId my first W90 in Jan 2015, and kept eating mostly W30 or paleo for almost 15 months. Jan 1, 2016 I felt like a million bucks after having gone through the holidays without a single binge (the usual suspects through the holidays....candy and desserts...) and went into the new year not feeling hopeless or needing to lose weight for the first time in over a decade. To make a long story short since Oct. 2016 I've been binge eating candy (a big bag almost daily,) or eating 2 donuts daily and feeling tired, lethargic, bloated and miserable, and have gained back over half of the 30# I had lost. I did another Whole 30 this January 2017 successfully...sort of. I did allow Larabar snacks almost daily when coming home from work...a.very common time to snack, I know. But otherwise did it to a Tee. Once again I feel hopeless and defeated. Daily I'm eating a W30 breakfast and lunch, and vowing NOT to stop and buy candy, only to stop and buy not 1 bag of candy but sometimes 2. I eat the whole thing before going home and thinking...praying, I won't do it again tomorrow only to wake up the next day to do it again. I know this isn't exclusive to me but feel like such a loser anyway. I'm 56 years old and so afraid of this being my life from now on. I am a Physical therapist assistant and see what happens when you lead an unhealthy lifestyle. And I felt so freaking good, emotionally and physically, when I ate clean! It makes no sense to know better and not do better, but sometimes I feel completely powerless. Thank God I'm healthy but I won't be for long if I keep this stupidity up. How do you know when it's the sugar dragon or if it's an eating disorder? (I don't throw up, and am mostly afraid to weigh.)
  4. So far loving my Whole30. On day 12 and I finally had a good run. I ran at regular speed but my HR was significantly lower than pre-Whole30, which is awesome for a distance runner. My concern is this, I'm recovered(ing) ED gal who has for the past 4 years had on and off bouts with stumbling back into bad restriction habits. The 4 days of my Whole30 I totally failed at the no snacking thing, even though my snacks were typically pre-workout they weren't template (normally a banana and some chicken or an epic bar). For the last 8 days I've been following the no snacking rule to a T. Except for once when I was at a work conference and lunch break wasn't for another 2 hours and I broke down and had half a lara bar because my breakfast had been 6 hours before and I totally couldn't concentrate. Other than that, no snacking. Anyways, I'm noticing that I'm starting to *enjoy* the empty feeling between meals and crave it, therefore my meals themselves are getting smaller and I'm getting anxiety about eating anything at all. For me, this is a trigger into a pattern of bad behavior. Just to verbalized it is a step and hard. Any advice? And yes I see a ED psychologist. I really really want to continue my Whole30 because I finally feel the tiger blood coming and I'm never bloated, no GI issues running, energy galore, sleeping like 9-10 hours a night etc.
  5. Hi all! A little background...I'm a 40 year old mother, wife, and business owner. I'm in good shape, healthy weight, with a history of anxiety disorder (been symptom free for years, med free since 2005). I also have an eating disorder history (EDNOS) and have been symptom free from that since 2006. Lastly, I got sober in 2011 Sort of sound like a hot mess, but really I've been in strong recovery for a long time and been mentally and emotionally well. Enter the Whole 30. I'd been wanting to clean up some eating for some time, and my husband I decided to give it a shot. I've gained about 8 pounds since last summer and knew we needed a change. We're currently on Day 19. The first week was fine, the only symptoms I felt was a headache and fatigue on day 1 and that was it! At the end of the first week I'd clearly lost weight (no scale, no measurements, but my pants fit better, yay!). Week 2 was the same. Around day 14 I woke up with an overwhelming feeling of sadness that I could. Not. Shake. It's still with me on day 19. I've never had a history of depression, but this sure feels like it. A couple days later I was getting dressed and noticed in the mirror that I had not only gained the weight back I had lost, but look like I'm gaining more. Which sent me into a tailspin. I don't know what's causing the weight gain and strong feelings of sadness. I'm wondering if I should quit the Whole 30. I've got what I wanted-- better insight with food, and I don't even want ice cream, I just want the stress and sadness to go away. Or, should I stick it out? I know the weight gain shouldn't matter (even though my husband has lost about 14 pounds- yes, he weighed himself) but for a girl whose struggled with an eating disorder, this isn't good. All my old thought patterns have come back and are making things worse. So, please be gentle with your feedback and advice. The weight gain could be too little calories, I don't know. I feel like I'm getting enough carbs, but maybe not. And to be honest, at this point I don't want anything MORE strict, like, "Eat this, not that" or "cut out this and see what happens". No, I'm over the rules. I think what I'm looking for is- has this happened to anyone else? I read an article from a doctor who spent her life studying alcoholism and sugar addiction and she said they are the same and that quitting sugar so abruptly makes us WORSE, not better. I don't know how much of that is clinically proven or true, but it sure as hell made me feel broken. All in all, at this point I'm still doing the Whole 30 just to do it. Not because I want to. I don't want to quit. But, I just don't know what to do... Thanks for listening.
  6. Hi - I have just finished day 3 of W30 and up until today, I was advised that I was not eating enough food, which would be contributing to my fatigue, brain fog and headaches as well as feeling hungry only a couple hours after finishing a meal. My concern is this: I have a history of anorexia, although I have been okay for the last 10 years (with a few struggles here and there, of course), but I have always come out sending my food aversion to the curb. As I was eating today I had a small anxiety attack that I am eating too much, especially too much fat (which is always good fat, like coconut oil, EVOO or avocado and within the meal template amounts) and that if I continue this way I am going to get fat. I have purchased the It Starts with Food book and am in the process of reading it to understand food and why you need to eat a lot more of good nutritious food to become full and healthy in comparison to carb-dense food that lacks much nutrition (like chips, bread, etc). Prior to this I always thought that less was better..."don't eat more than 4 oz of protein" "Eat on a smaller plate to help your portions stay smaller"... you all know the things us ladies "learn" to try and not eat too much. I guess with all of this past brainwashing about food, it is just hard for me to eat enough and not feel guilty about it. Does anyone have experience with this or could give advise on what I am feeling right now? Here is today's food log to give an idea of what I had. Brunch (around 10:30am) 2 eggs scrambled 1 1/2 medium potatoes sliced and pan fried in EVOO - dipped in HM mayo 1/2 avocado 1 cup sauteed red peppers 8 oz black coffee Snack 1 T coconut oil with cinnamon 1/2 cup watermelon Dinner Palm sized - 1inch thick chicken breast cooked with 1 tsp of coconut oil inside 2/3 cup beets 1/2 cup raw carrots 1 cup summer squash 1 T hm mayo for dip a couple of small pieces of watermelon Water - approx 75 - 90 oz Thank you to anyone who can advise.
  7. FierceFabulousConfident

    Living my life!

    Hello! I'm Shannon, I'm a food addict. In fact, I'm a recovering binge eater and laxative user. My first binge was when I was about 8 years old during a argument my parents were having. And so started my new way of coping. I was raised by two people who seemed like they had everything going for them on the outside, but they were actually not as they seemed. They decided to adopt me when I was 10. I was emotionally abused and so were the other kids that were adopted. They had a hold on me that I can't even explain to this day, I knew something was off and so I turned to food. When I was in high school, I started figuring out what was off and started trying to control my eating. Thus began 10 years of yo-yo dieting and only gaining weight. I moved out when I was 20, but it wasn't far enough away, they still controlled me. So when I turned 21 I moved to Chicago to be with my high school boyfriend and then when we were 23 we moved to Los Angeles. When I was 24 I slowly started to work on my past and try and overcome my binge eating, it back fired and the abuse continued. I started taking laxatives to try and control the binges. I got engaged to my wonderful high school sweetheart just before I turned 25! Again, I tried working on things with my adoptive parents and again it didn't work. I had to cut off all communication, it was tough. They stalked me and called me a liar, but I stood fast. Now as my 26th birthday has just rolled past and my upcoming wedding approaches, I realized I still continue to let them control me even without them in my life physically. I'm constantly living my life on the sidelines. I'm not doing that anymore, I'm reaching out to get help (from a therapist (soon, hopefully)) and from anyone that I can. This Whole30 will be one of the hardest things I've done, I can promise you that. But, I'm looking forward to completing something.I'm looking forward to the benefits. I won't lie, I'm concerned about the weight loss, but what really enticed me was the fact that I could control my cravings by eliminating my triggers. That I could have more energy. That I could have health benefits. That I could live.
  8. Hi All, I'm prepping to start a Whole30 in a couple weeks, and I am really excited and hopeful to start. However, I have a particular friend that gets very protective and defensive whenever I attempt to change my eating habits. Once I tried doing an Eat Stop Eat program and she angrily lectured me to never do it again, and that it was obvious I would develop an eating disorder from a diet like that. I'm not sure how to handle her because she grew up with an eating disorder herself (I have not had an eating disorder). I know some people will be skeptical in general, but how do I explain my choice to do a Whole30 to someone who will be convinced I'm trying to adopt disordered eating? Anyone have a similar friend?
  9. On day 23 of my whole30, some old demons caught up with me and a lot of dried fruit turned into, lots of nuts then two bowls of muesli with skimmed milk, granola and feelings of failure. I told my whole30 confidante and started again the next day. I am proud that i started again straight away as my problems have meant days and days of bed and bingeing not even that long ago. But i can't shake this feeling of failure and dishonesty to whole30. i know i am just doing this for myself, and i dont have to 'report' to anyone, but its this weird feeling and i dont know how to shake it. I'm so incredibly proud of the progress i had made on the whole30 as i went 23 days binge free, whereas for the past year i have barely made 10 days without sabotaging myself. Would appreciate any words of motivation or encouragement. Maybe i'm just having a weird one, but its not a nice feeling when i know (logically) that i'm doing fine. (currently day 5 of my restarted whole30) Thanks!