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Gwendolyn's W30 Blog or How To Eat Your Weight in Fish&Eggs


Gwendolyn

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Day 14... My TWO Week mark! My biggest fear when I started W30 was that I would not be able to stomach as much eggs and fish required to do this without eating any other meat. I've surprised myself, really, in so many ways. My main goal is to change my relationship with food, maybe get back to a place where I cared more about what was going into my body, cooked more at home and from scratch. W30 has forced me to do just that. I'm feeling good. There are some things I miss, of course, and I've started thinking about what I might eat after my 30 days have past... but right now, it's a bit hard for me to think about going back to a lot of those things.

Again, blogging late, so cutting this short!

M1 - erm, was running super late, so took two eggs to cook in the microwave at work! Had those with avo and grapefruit.

M2 - So excited about this! Read on a quick lunch tip on TheClothesMakeTheGirl - tossing frozen veggies and meat (in my case, cooked shrimp) olive oil and seasonings in tupperware, put in the work fridge, and microwave 3 min when it's lunchtime. Awesome! Really perfect and EASY.

M3 - Mashed cauliflower and parsnips! Samon cakes! Broccoli! YUM!

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Didn't blog last night... hit a wall. Kinda hard, actually. Day 15 - some work stress, last day of my cycle, ate dinner quite early... maybe some other stuff... possibly a combination of these things led to some real exhaustion and then to me eating a treat-dessert-snack whatever you want to call it. I actually barely remember doing it, but I ate a Larabar with shredded coconut pretty late. This may seem as if I'm being DRAMATIC about this, but two weeks in and I eat my first late night snack; feels pretty ugh. I know now I cannot have Larabars in the house. I've limited my fruit tremendously because, yeah, it doesn't matter where the sugar is coming from, I get dependent on it. And late night sugar bingeing was/is/will be a major crutch of mine. I only have two weeks left of my W30 and I'm scared to death of a slippery slope when I start to incorporate foods again. I know that I shouldn't focus on this now. I have time, I can extend my 30 days... but I'd really like to not feel as if I have no control over what I put in my body, unless I have strict guidelines.

I don't think I've blogged much about how I've been feeling physically? But I'm definitely feeling... lighter? I honestly don't think I've lost more than maybe 5 pounds, not that that's why I'm doing this – at least, not the majority of the reason. Clothes aren't really feeling looser. BUT, my stomach feels softer... if that makes sense. I keep poking at it because it feels so different. I feel different, lighter on the inside!!

I am not having afternoon cravings, although I am allowing myself to drink more coffee than before I started. I have consistent energy through (most) of my days. I'm sleeping more soundly and falling asleep with more ease. Still incredibly difficult to wake in the morning. Like sifting through gauzy layers of cobweb. But I've never, ever been a morning person. So... maybe I shouldn't expect too much of a change. O, my face feels softer! I didn't have one breakout during my cycle, at all. Wha? Awesome.

So... meals for my 15th day were pretty norm. O! Mellow Mushroom just opened and thinking I could utilize the “build your own salad†option, we went for lunch. Salad vegetables were an easy choice, so then I asked about adding shrimp, hoping for steamed they only had grilled. So then I asked about the oil and if they'd be grilled in a pan, so no lingering soy oil or whatever... Anyway the waitress was ahmazing and worked with me (and my anxiety ridden questions). They do have a gluten-free menu, so I'm guessing they have experience with making sure not to cross-contaminate. I'm utterly frightened that I was dosed with something non-compliant. UGH. I'm obsessing in a possibly unhealthy way, but I just don't think I can handle going out to eat...

For M3 I ate leftover salmon cakes and mashed cauliflower & parsnips. Then the aforementioned Larabar...

And now for a quick Day 16 mention because it's midnight and I haven't been up this late all week! I've not been eating the veggie portion, really, of M1 – usually just eggs and avo, need to fix that starting tomorrow. M2 was a huge salad with tuna and I made a portabella, onion, garlic and leftover salmon omelet for M3 and had steamed green beans with garlic salt and lemon juice and grape tomatoes. Also made mayo again tonight!

Two weeks left....

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Day 17 and I'm still doing this! Although... not very well today. Woke up late and ran out to the farmer's market before eating anything. Big mistake. Stopped for coffee and then walked around with friends at the market - got baby turnips and beets and russian kale! - and also stood in line with them for fresh Amish donuts. Obvi I abstained... but wow it was hot and the sun was blaring and then it was noon, I hadn't eaten and felt like I was going to fall over. FAIL! I booked it home (chomped on a raw kale leaf...) and made an omelet with fresh spinach, baby kale, grape toms, garlic. Ate it up!! Then had to run errands - did not plan well, again. So ate a Larabar while I was out. Ugh! When I finally got home again, I ate a big ol' salad with tuna and mayo that I whipped up last night. Cut up a baby turnip - sweet and kinda spicy? Nice and crunchy in my salad. And I had some almond butter later...

Feel pretty good today.

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Day 18 was a productive one, in a lot of ways! But as far as my W30, I did some cleaning out of the fridge, cooking up stuff and prepping. Realized I need to go shopping... I'm starting to get a bit ick on fish, so I need to step up my cooking a bit. The thought of another can of tuna or defrosted shrimp is making me kind of ill. This lead to a lack of protein with dinner.

M1 was another spinach, baby kale, grape toms omelet; M2 I made tuna salad with olives and mayo on romaine with a rice vinegar & sesame oil cucumber salad and a little bit of the roasted beets and carrots I made today. M3 I cooked up a ton of beet greens with mushrooms and had a some more of the roasted beets. Note, no protein. So.... I put some almond butter on a romaine leaf. It is what it is! I'll do better tomorrow...

Side note... to myself or anyone reading this! I might not mention fats (unless avo, mayo) in my meals, but I use a great glob of coconut oil whenever I cook whatever I cook. Or a mixture with olive oil. I have a pound of grass fed butter...and meant to clarify it today as I'm out of ghee, but that just didn't happen.

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Man.. bedtime seems to come earlier and earlier these days... Day 19 and I got compliments on my skin today! My face feels so smooth and clear... it's crazy! I felt less bulge-y in my tummy today as well. Jeans still tight... but different? I dunno.. I feel better and different in a good way is all I'm saying!!

 

I baked eggs last night, so took them to work. For M1 had eggs, cuke salad and avo - yum! Then realized I forgot my tuna so had the other baked eggs on my salad of Russian kale, spinach, baby kale, cukes, carrots, avo, cold roasted beets... good times. Although, I think that Russian kale I got at the farmer's market is not the best kind raw. Hmm. Before M3 I clarified some damn butter, ya'll. I think there's definitely something to be said for having the right tools for a task - I did not have the right tools for straining and my improvisation proved to be time consuming and difficult. O well! Then I made yellow squash noodles (sqoodles?) and sauteed onion, garlic and shrimp in the clarified butter. Crazy yum.

 

Random craving... this cinnamon sugar butter that Country Crock made when I was a kid?? Probably all vegetable oil. Ick.

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YIKES! Have been crazy busy the past few days and have not blogged for my Day20 or Day21! And now it's Day22!! And this post is going to be crazy short! I ran out of eggs and went without for two breakfasts! But besides that, I've been on track. Feeling good.. looking at the home stretch and wondering how I'm going to react to my first day off the 30.. right now thinking I want to just continue on.. but man would I love a delicious BEER!

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Well dang! I made a post yesterday, but my session timed-out and didn't post! Womp. No worries.. here I am again today, ya'll. Day 29. WHAT. Life - between work and packing to move and stuff - has really gotten in the way of my posts here, but not in the way of my W30. Besides a few meals here and there that did not have adequate protein - this got a bit difficult or maybe I just became a little lazy or busy - I've done really well. This week several people have commented on my weight loss, it's not tremendous, but it's noticeable. Which is great! My skin looks bright and apparently so do my eyes?? I feel happier. My tum feels good. Good stuff, ya'll. 

 

So. I have no plans to go off plan yet. Although I am going to a birthday party on my day one... my only temptation(?) is alcohol. To drink or not to drink?? I'm not sure what my answer is yet, but I know for sure that I'll be continuing on with the rest of the W30 rules. I'd love to stay on this path until my endocrinologist appointment next month. That's my goal. A lot is happening between now and then, including moving as well as attending a weekend long "self-awareness" program. I will just need to really plan in advance. I can do this!!!

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I DID IT!!!

30 days!!!!!

 

I am just in awe that I was able to do this. I had no idea that I was still capable of such self-control. I feel good! But, not close to wanting to stop. Not sure what's going to happen at this birthday party I'm going to tonight, though. There will be wine. There will be beer. Hmmm.....

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WOOOT. Go you, Gwendolyn.

 

I am a relative noob; I'm starting Day 8 and I only joined the forum 5 days ago, due to a bug that kept my account in permanent "validating" status for 3 days. Reading your log was not only terrific and inspiring, but also illustrative. I tend to be very "all or nothing" in projects, so if, say, I keep a food log, and then don't update it for a day and a half, I feel like I've blown the whole log, and it's not worth trying to continue. Then I read your log, and I realized: You can miss a day or two of Writing Everything Down, and still complete the program! And benefit from it, even!

 

Please do check in after the birthday party tonight. I'm looking forward to hearing what you end up eating and drinking, and how you feel afterwards, whether you partake in the alcohol or not. And thank you for sharing with us.

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Thanks so much, Chitowngirlintx and Bakerina!! Ahhhh....! I'm so glad that my posts have been helpful at all, to anyone! Day31 is already off to a good start - one of my huge cravings USED TO BE weekend breakfasts... literally waking up Saturday mornings thinking.. umm, what pastry/pancake/donut am I getting into today? So my day-after-day-30 fear was waking up feeling that way. But that craving wasn't there. The desire that my cats would bring me coffee was still there.. haha. But I didn't want sugary carbs - M1 was stir-fried kale with garlic and crushed red pepper and eggs scrambled into it, also grape tomatoes, in ghee. I'm satisfied and full and have energy. I refuse to go down a slippery slop. I will let you all know how it goes tonight...

 

Bakerina ~ You can do it!! I totally get that feeling of wanting to do something 100% or not at all. But the most important thing, for me, was making sure I shopped enough and followed the program - and if I was too spent to log on and post, no loss.

 

Chitowngirlintx ~ I really appreciate all of your encouraging posts here on my blog! Just a few words from someone who doesn't even know, really helped a ton... and also makes me realize I should've been posting on others blogs a TON more. Thank you!

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Home from the party... and not one non-compliant anything! I took a bunch of seltzer and some ice coffee and didn't want to drink alcohol, at all. I was def tempted by the yummy food... but did not cave. Feeling awesome!!

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Last Friday was my Day 30 and I am still going! I made the decision to stay 100% compliant until the end of the month, when I move across town. I may continue on after.. but I don't want to add anxiety to an already anxiety filled event - moving is always really difficult for me (for everyone, I'm sure!). Although, at this point, I'm curious if reintroduction will be just as difficult. I don't know. I have these fears of obsessively worrying about my food. I have MAJOR fears of slippery-slope-syndrome. I am worried that the weekend long retreat I'm attending July 6/7 will be difficult enough without having to think so much about my food. I don't know.

 

ALSO. I lost 10 pounds.10 pounds! I can't even speak to how BIG this is. I have been diagnosed with PCOS for three years - although I've most likely had it for at least all of my thirties and the only time I've lost any weight was while on Metformin/Glumetza. I have not been medicated for about a year (and had gained back each pound lost while I was on the drugs). I am so excited about this.. but also extremely fearful. What if I gain it all back if/when I start integrating? I have my first endocrinologist appointment in over two years at the end of July and I'd love to stay off the medication. I'm really interested in what my blood work will look like and what my endo will say about W30.

 

Eh.. I feel like I sound a bit of a wreck. I'm coming up on my cycle, and that surely doesn't help my food/body anxiety. I guess I'm just trying my best to take each day as it comes. Also, I realize I need to take this blog over to a different part of the forum! This will my last post here...

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