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Julie's Whole30 Experiences


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Day 5 or Day 2.  We'll see. 


I was going great guns having started on July 1.  July 3 brought a crisis of doubt to me (and a stray from the program).  So soon?  Yup.  I really had issues with the conventional wisdom record in my head that kept saying "WHOLE GRAINS GOOD! FAT BAD!"


It took me that day to get my head back on track.  Using the "Okay if in 30 days I'm not convinced then fine, I'll  revert to my wicked ways and be done with it." method of reassurance, I plod on .


Next week I am traveling for work but anticipate that I can get what I need to stock the hotel room from a  Safeway grocery store in the vicinity.  I have a short shopping list and am also carrying an empty bento for packing my lunch (during the training).


It's do-able for sure but more importantly, it's critical that I adhere to the program next week.  I will not have another option like this throughout this period: I have no one else to cook for, I will not be eating under the scrutiny of others and I will hopefully be less tempted to read the naysayers.


FanTASTic breakfast today: sauteed spa squash in ghee with some cubed nitrate-free ham; leftover sweet potato nuked with a little diced pear and cinnamon.  I'd do that one again.



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I'm in that place where you've been clean enough to start feeling somewhat elated. I mean over the top in a good mood, possibly bordering on manic. Either that or I'm just manic. Could be. Have a lot to do in my head but not really. Flying out tomorrow for work so today it's laundry, packing and making list after never ending list.

But when I awoke this morning (after a crummy night's sleep --- hot flash after hot flash after hot flash) I was in a floaty kind of mood. Not unhappy that I slept poorly nor unhappy that I had gotten up at oh dark thirty after giving up on sleep. Just pretty satisfied having had a lovely Friday night meal that didn't involve torturing myself over something I shouldn't indulge in. Guiltfree makes me feel lighter already!

Now: one week on the road, forced away from the scales and I can either go hog wild with the food and drink or completely compliant (or as compliant as I can be within the limits of the grocery stores up there). The plan is to be compliant. The shopping list is written. After I locate my hotel, I'll locate the Safeway and Trader Joe not too far away (what did we do before Google Maps?). And I may find that state park and go for a hike until I can get into my room.

Life can be pretty good when you destress it. Honestly I have felt so frequently that I am going mad over the food and exercise thing. That is not to say theyre both not important but I veer like a pendulum so easily that it is unnerving. At some point yesterday I realized I was actually adding stress to my life over two things that were, ultimately, basic: food and activity. You either eat food that's healthy or you don't, right? You either move or you don't. There's no great debate that's necessary.

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On the road now and it's Day Three of my trip. Sunday when I arrived in town I drove over to the local Safeway and acquired some carrots, grapes, individual packets of almond butter, sardines and a roast chicken. I had packed a bento box with a lunch for Sunday and ate that at a state park. I use that now for packing lunches for during my classes. So far so good but I feel terribly challenged as my general habit has been to indulge in bad stuff on the road. Expense account (I'll have to explain to my Business Office about the Safeway receipt), being "away" from home, etc. etc. Tends for me to mean indulgence.

Last night after class and on the way back to the hotel I felt myself wavering. I did okay. Took myself for a walk upon return to the hotel to shake myself out of the mood but I know the challenge will be there tonight. Now, the logic has to be: "I've gone to all this trouble and I am not going to waste that effort just because I'm in the mood to have a drink/dinner out/ etc.

I hope it will work. I came here to blog today as my general places for support really don't agree with the Whole30 concept so support systems are pretty dim.

Re-reading my prior blog I realize that I'm my own best support system in this effort. It's easy: I'm doing this and whether or not in (less than) 30 days I'm still doing this is neither here nor there really. I can return to whatever I was doing before this and no harm, no foul. On the other hand I could spin my brain cells testing myself all week like picking at a mosquito bite and accomplish absolutely nothing but frustration.

Andiamo. Plan for post class today: restock my "supplies" from Trader Joe's or Safeway for dinner (and find maybe something salady). Read a little bit of "It starts with food" or "Primal Connection" to get my head straighter (and maybe do that before I get into the car!). And get on with it. It's a finite period of time and I'm not feeling bad so I can assume this isn't going to kill me.

"Common Wisdom" and decades of indoctrination of what healthy eating is is such a drag sometimes. :-D

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Some background on me. Former WW leader (years ago). I made "goal" with weight watchers three times since 1987 but never managed to keep it off. But I have to get points for being stubborn about it. The last 10 years I've been Weight Watchers and South Beach and so forth with very little movement any way I went. Early this year I read Robb Wolf's book which put me onto the paleo eating. From there I went to Diana Fillippo's book "Practical Paleo" (or is it "Everyday"), then "It starts with food" and currently on Primal blueprint.

At any rate, through this year I've been working on Paleo but of course had my many doubts and am still not convinced (see posts earlier). The thing of it is: last week I was speaking with a staff member who is sick at least once a month and, while commiserating with her, I realized I hadn't been sick all year, I hadn't been taking allergy pills and i have finally lost 21 pounds (with about the same to go still) with very little weighing and measuring.

i still need some convincing but if my general lack of "stinkiness" is attributable to change in diet, then there's another thing (much less gas). My energy SEEMS higher but I have to say I'm highly suggestible so I could be just THINKING I have more energy.

Why Whole30 then? I really want to clean it out. I've been dorking around with dairy and occasional grains when I have the cravings and it's time to try to go without them. I can reassess this soon but let me first clean the slate.

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Still on the road and in a hotel. I'm still staying with it thought it continues to be hard after classes to regroup my head and say "Nah, not going out for a glass of wine." I found the most useful argument to defeat that was "Why? You don't drink wine after work at home? How is this different?" Then the evil me says 'but I'm alone and I will be bored!" And then I say "Well, how will wine keep you from being bored?" And that's usually where my head game ends.

This is do-able if boring on the road: thank heavens for roast chickens!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Well I fell off that week on the road -- the very last day mind you.  I was THIS close to getting through it!  Where did I go wrong?

I remember clearly staring at the shrimp wrap provided to me by the corporation.  I had eaten all the shrimp out of the tortilla  . . . fairly quickly.  It was the end of the training session, I had passed my test, received my certificate and there I sat: staring at the sodden tortilla, empty now of fat OR protein.  It seemed somehow . . . sad.  I felt I should be GIVEN something more than that for having stayed the course, passed the test, gotten the certificate, been away from home, stayed true to Whole30 for 4.5 days on the road.


In my head I heard The Voice: the "What The Hell Voice".  And I ate the tortilla.


Was it worth it?  At the moment, oh yes.  And, had I stopped there I would have been fine.  I even "behaved" myself at dinner.  But then the next day I was in the airport.  Found some nuts and some water to eat while waiting for my flight.  Again I had that "What the Hell Voice" happen.  I'm flying right? I'm tired, right?  I've been away from home and it's like it's the weekend.  I DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS!  So a got a bagel.  To be fair there was protein on it (lox).


I've spent the time since that day and today girding my loins to take another run at this on August 1.  In the meantime, I have not been unpaleo and even pretty strict about things like sweeteners and so forth.  But now, it's not just "cleaning up".  It's not just 30 days of stricter eating.  It's a Holy Damn Grail. 


I have to travel again and there will be tempations.  But I am hoping I learned something this round.  I need to gag that "What the Hell Voice" and save it for later.

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Day one is tomorrow.  August 1.  I was going to mark yesterday as Day 1 (and posted about it) but couldn't get my Official Whole30 Daily thingie to be updated in time and yes, it does matter that much to me!


So tomorrow: Day 1. 


What will August bring challenge-wise?


1) One week in an Arizona resort . . . but it's for work so that changes things.  No drinks, add in exercise easily and most likely take a grocery bag of reasonable things such as a cutting board, etc etc as suggested.  Also since I'm driving, I'll map out a trader joe's or other type of grocery store for supplying myself (similarly to what I did on my first go-round.


2) Dinner out and theatre one weekend.  It's a challenge but not a massive one.  I know I can get appropriate food and I'll suggest a restaurant where the martinis are no good and the wine is expensive.


3) Outside of that I have nothing out of the ordinary.  But the ordinary itself presents challenges.  Fatigue, empty plate syndrome, stress and frustration. Old age! 


But after all, tomorrow IS another day and the first day of my Whole30. 

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And finally it's August 1st.


Day 1.


I actually took a "Before" picture.  I truly don't expect great changes as I've been paleo-ish for most of the year but, hey, I'll play along.  NOW



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I am grumpier than I can remember doing this type of a thing.  It's the morning of day 2 and I'm pretty much ready to murder everyone.  For those of you who might read this and not have a sense of humor, that would be humor right there. 


Had a good first day.  Avoided all the stuff I'm supposed to.  Ate all the stuff I'm supposed to.  Last night after dinner I did indulge in a very small sweet potatoe with some ghee but found (after all) that I really didn't need to have had that.  I still did, mind you.  But I won't be pursuing "dessert" going forward.


I did bake a spaghetti squash for use this weekend (and maybe tonight).  Not unlike many, Friday night is normally our date night.  My only fear today is that he'll want pizza.  I can handle any restaurant in terms of choices but splitting a pizza with my husband is a big Red X for me.  And telling him that it'll be 30 days before I'd consider it isn't exactly my choice of how to proceed.


So I'll cross my fingers and hope that it doesn't occur to him.


I'd just as soon stay home tonight anyway.  I'm exhausted, I'm grumpy (see first paragraph), I'm fairly sure I hate humanity (humor again -- maybe) and I want to go to bed.

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Oh man oh man oh man.  I just had a rough spot there.  Husband and I are debating dinner (it's our Friday date night) and he pulls "Shrimp scampi on lemon butter pasta" on me after a debate over Thai or another place or something else.  And all along I'm cringing because going out makes me want wine (especially after today and this week).


I don't mind going home and cooking just to know precisely what I'm putting in the scampi and I can use spaghetti squash for my pasta side.  But for a while there I was seriously considering throwing my hands up in the air in complete frustration. 

Is it hard? oh yeah.  And some day I'm going to ask him if he just does this to push my buttons.  But not now.  Today is NOT that day.


On the bright side I went and did Jazzercise at lunch and at least I can feel virtuous thus far.  I really want to click that link on my Whole30 Daily that says "YES!  I did it today!"

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Day whatever.  I'm doing fine.  I find myself still a little short tempered but the clumsiness and absent mindedness have dissipated a bit.  Though I have to say that now I'm in "laid back hippy" mode which isn't exactly suitable for work.  I was talking to someone in my office and noticed that I had just about reclined in my chair with my hands clasped behind my head.  A most relaxed position and uncharacteristic for me.


I think officially this is day 3 (after a restart) but i admit I've lost count.  August 1 was when I started but then August 2nd I had a rebellion which consisted of deliberate imbibing of wine so I restarted the next day (August 3rd -- Saturday).  That makes this Day 3 then.  I are smart. 


The emails I get from Whole30 are a little behind but that's fine.  I think I can manage that.  <snort>  I'm such high maintenance.

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