1Maryann Posted October 20, 2013 Share Posted October 20, 2013 Hi, all! Missed you guys. Did a W30 in Sept, got a little off-track the beginning of Oct, then back on board.If you remember, my analogy was that food was like a pendulum for me and it either swings all the way clean or completely off the rails. The goal is to get it to stay somewhere in the sustainable middle. This last binge was the shortest yet. Less than a week. The things I used to want just don't hold the same allure any more. And if I do give in, they don't bring any satisfaction. So I dabbled on 'the dark side' for a few days and couldn't wait to get back on board. My new normal is a W30 with some store-bought dressing. Wow, what a rebel! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyS Posted October 20, 2013 Share Posted October 20, 2013 My current Whole30 has been a great help in the midst of some life changes. Glad to be here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyS Posted October 23, 2013 Share Posted October 23, 2013 I haven't been posting much this current Whole30, but I'm sure relieved to be on it. Unlike many folks (and unlike myself when I did my very first Whole30), I really needed to gain weight. I'm still under what I probably should be, but my weight and energy are increasing. Also, thanks to this group, I've found a great new doctor, a naturopathic doctor. I also still see my favorite MD. I'm a "throw all the spaghetti against the wall and see what sticks" kind of girl when it comes to medical treatment, I guess!! I'm really happy to report that my thyroid is doing well and I'm taking appropriate supplements for a seriously out of whack adrenal system. Life stresses this summer got waaaaay too overwhelming, and I'm also happy to be on a much better anti-anxiety medication. It all works together. And Whole30 is like coming home for me now. I feel so peaceful about my food, knowing I have this way of eating. I end my current Whole30 on November 7, and we'll see what I do from there. Right now this just feels gooooood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jtandi Posted October 23, 2013 Author Share Posted October 23, 2013 hi ladies! oh...dear...I am struggling here. like I said before my hubby is "off" his whole30 but also remaining off sugar/grains/etc and I think it's the right choice for him right now. Juzbo - your insight was what really inspired me to take a different perspective on HIS journey, not what I want his journey to be. he did have another doughnut at work the other day and HOLY BALLS! total asshole. again. and, again, hoping and praying he sees the connection. I am over the whole30 right now. I know this is a phase, but it's a hard one. and yesterday in my break room there were home made mini gluten free sweet potato muffins someone brought in. I think you know where this is going. needless to say they were really good...my other issue? we have eaten out at my favorite burger joint a couple times (delicious grass fed beef, etc) and I have not been worried about the aioli they make (they make an awesome chipotle one), have eaten the sweet potato fries (I know they are cooked in compliant oil but I never even thought to ask if they were dusted with flour or something else!). and I've eaten a lara bar every day. I feel like a failure. but I also feel like I need to come on here with my people and "come clean" SO, where do I go from here? not sure. but know I will continue through October 30. my last whole30 I came away with a feeling that a reset might be more like 2 weeks for me, but I felt like I needed longer this time. but I forget how much work it is...so I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I just feel so pressed for time right now. we have an out of town weekend November 2 & 3 and I don't know if I'm ready to go through the packing of the food, asking a million questions, etc. either way I know I don't want to add back in any grains other than occasional rice, and NO SUGAR. I might add in dairy, not sure (cream in my coffee. but I have to seriously think about my cheese habit. I love it but I know it's not good for me.) this past time I started adding in ice cream here and there, etc. so - no more. "worth it" and "special occasion" became loose. journey, Jess. journey. do resets, have time in between, know that each time in between will become stronger and stronger and resets will be less and less difficult because time in between will look closer and closer to whole eating. anyways, that's where I'm at. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Maryann Posted October 23, 2013 Share Posted October 23, 2013 I feel for you, Jess! I have no trouble doing an occasional W30 as a 'challenge', but making it a permanent lifestyle is hard. I feel like an addict sometimes, because one cheat, or one 'occasional' foray into the land of non-compliance and I am suddenly craving and giving myself permission to eat anything and everything. That's why I use the pendulum analogy. I swing all the way over to clean, then all the way back to SAD. I just want to stop somewhere in the middle. I want to eat well enough to maintain optimum health, but not in such a narrow range that I feel deprived. Over time, I think it is happening, but I'm not a patient person and I want everything to be perfect right now! And when I'm not perfect, I don't want to try for 'pretty good'. I don't know what the answer is. I think in some ways, your husband quitting was enough of a blow to influence your choices. When you think you have support, and then it disappears, it makes anything harder than if you went into something knowing you were on your own. It isn't just food, it works for all aspects of life. Don't set yourself up to fail If this W30 is broken for you, and you don't have your mojo any more, maybe you should give it a rest and listen to your body until it tells you you really need to do this again. Maybe trying to schedule W30s ahead of time isn't your answer. If you aren't physically and mentally invested in it, doing it because of an artificial date on a calendar doesn't promise much success. I think you are doing this one because you said you would months ago. That's not sufficient reason. You have to need it, but you also have to WANT it. You sound pretty ambivalent about it right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jtandi Posted October 23, 2013 Author Share Posted October 23, 2013 thanks Maryann I am actually wondering if it's the length rather than the set time that's hard for me. prior to starting I was SO excited and looking forward to this whole30 - TOTALLY needed! and so I actually think the time frame is good, but I think it's possible that a reset for me should be 2-3 weeks instead of 30 days...it is such a huge time commitment. I already know it is ahead of time, but it still amazes me. and I've added so much into my life since last January - I volunteered to be room parent and teach art class, I'm hitting CF 3x a week, Indie is now doing gymnastics 3-4 times a week, and husband is working nights so my duties around the house are WAY higher (not to mention he works during the day, so the times that my mom would come over during the day and help me with my laundry, etc, are long gone...). scheduling my whole30s ahead does help me in that I am a "preparer" - physically and mentally. I like to have the time to think ahead and plan, just makes me feel more in control. SO...when I started this I really really wanted it (I wanted it to be 50 days!) and now I do feel ambivalent. in some ways. I guess what I WANT is to eat how I should be eating - whole30 with some additions I feel comfortable with (heavy cream in coffee, eating salads from places I like that have decent food but probably non-compliant dressings, eating something other than the pork at Chipotle!)...and I am SO like you - pendulum city. guess I should cautiously tread back into the land I want to be in instead of forcing myself to stay here. and I may re-think my 3x a year reset and instead consider some 2 week resets...(yes, still planned ahead! haha!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melbournegirl Posted October 24, 2013 Share Posted October 24, 2013 You'll figure it out Jess. I hope I do too. I feel like I am way off the rails this week after having a perfect week last week... Should I try for moderate consistency instead? Should I stop trying and go with the flow? Maybe I should just focus on exercise and ignore food. Or do I need to try harder? I know my skin and tummy aren't happy and my clothes are too tight. And that I have to stop giving in to the coffee temptation as the flow on effects are exponential... Sigh.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melbournegirl Posted October 24, 2013 Share Posted October 24, 2013 Day1 of 35 today... That will take me to December 1st. I've been experimenting a bit with sugar, dairy and grains... What a disaster...headaches, bloating, irritability, extreme tiredness and skin infections that won't heal without antibiotics. So back to real food today, kicking and screaming and with two coffees and four headache pills to make it but kept away from wine and sugar despite a big family birthday celebration so hopefully on the way again to good health.... Will I ever learn??? Luckily my hubby is supportive.... He said "I know its not fair but you have dietary issues you have to manage so accept that and stay within what keeps you healthy rather than trying for the 447th time to eat how the rest of us eat". Sad but true... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelley417 Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 Hi all! So glad to find you here. I regret to tell you that my husband passed away on October 13th. He died at home in bed after 10 days of hospice crisis care surrounded by me and his 4 children and their spouses/significant others and it was a sad but beautiful send off. There were 450 people at the funeral and a minimum of 50 people at my house every day for a week. Lots of food was served by my friends. Each kid has a different eating style: 2 vegans, 2 vegetarians who eat only fish, a carnivore eating everything, a low carb person, and of course me. During this time we all succumbed to massive amounts of sugar, carbs and ice cream. I am giving myself til November 1 and then I will do a reset W30. I have been eating a lot of soup and juicing. I have given up the sugar. I am still eating bread and dairy from time to time. Not a lot of drinking. So, I'm getting ready for the discipline and looking forward to what I can control. I feel like I got hit by a truck and/or I am walking through sludge. I am at a low level of what I can accomplish each day-- -and there are a million little things to do that all take twice as long as I think they should (one hour dealing with American Express and I'm still not done with them!). But I have been walking on the beach about 3 miles almost every day (what a delight) and tonight I am going to do a restorative yoga class. I have missed you. Glad you're here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 Sending you some love and support, Shelley. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jtandi Posted October 28, 2013 Author Share Posted October 28, 2013 I've been thinking of you Shelly - I was aware after seeing your posts on FB and have been sending thoughts you way ever since. I've missed you on here, too, but know what you are going through I am so glad you have the family and support around you. 450 people - that's amazing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyS Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Shelley, I am so sorry. I remember reading the story of the love you two discovered, years after believing it could not happen to you again. Sending lots of love and light your way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melbournegirl Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Oh Shelley, I am so sad for you... Thanks for thinking of us and sharing. That beach walk sounds like a perfect place for being sad and reaching out to your husband. It's just terrible how your life changes with this and you can't do a damn thing about it except hope you will see each other again one day.... Keep in touch.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelley417 Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 Thank you all for your kind words. Even though we don't see each other I know that we know each other and have become friends throughout these past 10 months. I am enjoying reading this thread because it shows how we have evolved, how we are so human and how we are still charting our individual courses but still together-- along with some others who may enjoy our style. Glad to be back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jtandi Posted October 30, 2013 Author Share Posted October 30, 2013 oh people - today is day 30! but I totally failed. went to daughters school for lunch and brought my soup...ate it...then ate some of the sushi in her lunch. I know, I know, day 30 for crying out loud. but seriously, I learn so much each time this time I've really been able to take a look at my "on" vs "off" the "diet" mentality. I am so blessed to be truly beginning to understand this is a way of life. I get people who say 80/20 or whatever, but I think it is so completely deceiving. there was a part of me who really wanted to live that way, but I realized that by doing the best I can every day to stay 100% compliant will probably bring me to around a 90/10 or 95/5 just by virtue of not being so stressed about every single thing. it doesn't NOT mean ice cream on weekends or a "free" day once a week. it means eating as clean as I can with what I've got...yes, I can eat a salad from Panera but no, I don't grab a cookie with it. (actually I haven't had a cookie from there since jan. 1!) holy crap, what a change in my life. when I go to chipotle I don't have to stick with pork, I can have chicken or veggies and maybe some cheese or sour cream or rice (depending on the day) I'm grateful I don't have to go through reintroduction and that I know what bothers me. as always a bit bummed that not much does bother me that much, but that's ok. anyways...who else is done today??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyS Posted October 31, 2013 Share Posted October 31, 2013 Congrats! I'm done Nov. 7, except I had half a sandwich one day last week. Right now I'm feeling best eating this way, so I may keep it up until we go traveling later in the month. I actually had hives after going off of Whole30/mostly Whole30 eating for a few weeks back in August/September. It reminded me of the childhood days when I had lots of allergies - mostly to foods that are not Whole30 compliant. Heh. Funny, I've never done a Whole30 where I ate anything non-compliant during one. I figure this go-round, since I know I'll be eating this way from now on again, it wasn't a total deal-breaker. Also, I could feel the hives wanting to come back, so I'm not tempted to renew that experience. OUCH! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melbournegirl Posted October 31, 2013 Share Posted October 31, 2013 I'm only on day 4 she wails...... Great effort Jess, day 30 is good, I've had a few end on day 25! I won't be dipping in to the dairy, grains and sugar for a long time, skin is still severely inflamed and painful... Having to cut out cocoa, eggs and citrus in the hope that helps speed up any improvement Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Maryann Posted October 31, 2013 Share Posted October 31, 2013 Just got here after too long. Shelley, I am so sorry to hear about your husband. Please know my thoughts are with you as you find your way through a new chapter of your life. The beach is my healing place as well. So grateful to live where it is so available year round. Jess, it wasn't pretty, but you made it! Justine, Day 4. No wonder you're wailing. Karen and Amy, hope all is going well. WHERE IS LINDA???? I'm doing well. Mostly compliant except for things like mayo and salad dressings. Have had a bit of 85% chocolate once or twice, and had a small dalliance with coconut milk ice cream. None of these things make me want more off-roading, which is a vast improvement. I don't know what would happen if I had pizza, and not willing to find out just yet. Eventually I want to be able to off-road for a specific item and not have it make me stay off track for days. I'm getting better at it, but not perfect by a long shot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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