Embarrassed

[NazzaB]

I don't know if this is a ladies only problem, but I'm assuming if men have this issue then it's a lesser percentage.

 

I am kind of, at times, embarrassed of the size of my meals.

 

The first situation I'm embarrassed with is eating breakfast in front of my partner. Now; I've always been a bigger eater than him ever since we met and to an extent I've learned to just deal with it. And at dinner we usually eat the same amount. But it's more me cooking up a huge egg scramble with a shit ton of veggies and piling it onto a plate in the morning while he sits there eating a banana that makes me a little self conscious. Not enough to not do it, but just enough. Also - I don't think I could bring myself to eat a brekkie like that at work.

 

I have also noticed some of my family comment on the amount that I eat if I make a huge salad or something, or go back for another piece of chicken (because I'm not eating the bread/rice etc). I had to have my lunch in two serves at work yesterday because there wasn't a bowl big enough! I sat there eating my gargantuan tuna salad while the guy next to me at two pieces of toast.

 

I think it's odd because no one ever commented if I ate half a loaf of bread with dinner or a huge bowl of cereal, but the moment it's extra 'real' food that people are interested.

 

I'm sure they're not thinking 'holy shit what a pig' but it's amazing how different and out of the norm I feel eating Whole30 in front of people who have no idea what it's about.

 

Does anyone else have this issue?

 

 

[connie_m]

I know what you're saying - sometimes it just looks like a LOT of food, especially because I used to eat 5 or 6 smaller meals every day, so I'm not used to seeing a plate that full.   

 

But the proof is that it works.   I'm eating what looks like a lot, but my body composition is improving, etc.   So I don't really worry about it.   

[Applegirl]

I know.  But you'll just have to let it go and let the results speak for themselves.  Women are supposed to eat nothing to perpetuate the feminine stereotype, regardless of how ridiculous it is - and a great deal of it is self-imposed.

 

A couple of huge salads and loads of vegis will raise eyebrows, but 3 slices of pizza and a double scoop of ice cream at a meal wouldn't get noticed.  Kind of kooky!

[TrayS]

Haha yeah, I've had this concern too. What this has turned into for me is right about the time my husband leaves for work and is usually sauntering through the kitchen to fill his coffee mug and maybe make himself a lunch (he doesn't eat breakfast), I am piling on a plate of food - a full dinner-sized plate - packed with eggs and whatever else I am eating. I used to worry about him judging me but it's been a year since I started eating this way - I am over it. Same with coworkers, they're used to me eating this way. At first they asked questions but not so much anymore.

 

As your experiences point out, other people are the problem, not you. I mean seriously, 2 pieces of toast for lunch is just ridiculous!

[amberino21]

You're embarrassed because you're eating food? I think most people have been brainwashed for so long that less is better - I've got more comments in the past 3-4 years about my size and the amount of food I eat than when I was overweight and making not so good choices.

I think its funny! I'd rather my nutrient dense 8 cup salad with protein and good fat, over their nutrient void choice that barely covers a side plate.

[Bet]

Girl, get over it!!!! On this program, you can't eat too much. Part of the program is also getting rid of old fashioned thinking about diet and culture.

 

Remember in Gone With the Wind when Mammy made Scarlett eat before the big BBQ so she wouldn't eat too much there (in front of possible husbands...). Haven't we progressed beyond that by now?????

 

BTW, Scarlett chowed down at the BBQ anyway. Love that character!

[NazzaB]

I just want to make it clear it's not something I need to 'get over'... I'm not embarrassed to the point of it controlling my decisions. I just was wondering if I was alone in this experience.

 

I look at people eating toast for lunch and I feel sorry for them, with me and my delicious feast!

[runninglawyer88]

My husband encourages me to EAT EAT EAT. He's very much of the anti-diet mindset and thinks that I should probably eat more calorie dense foods. He also knows I'm sensitive and if he ever SAID anything I'd probably lose it; so, he never would. 

 

I can say that when my husband eats a friggin' bowl of cereal for breakfast and says that he's "good" I nearly blow a gasket (inside). I also know that those are MY ISSUES...I shouldn't care how much I eat in comparison to anyone else. My body is my business and anyone who wants to judge the quantity of my food can F**K off. Seriously. 

 

I do know what you mean though about being self conscious though not enough to change it. I totally feel that way and just tell myself that the fact that people even notice better yet comment says far more about them that it does about me. Clearly they've given in to the socialization that brainwashes people into believing that being healthy and fit means starving yourself. 

[sjosey77]

It's funny, I normally get two reactions.  The first is to make fun of what I am eating and talk about how if I believe in the "caveman" way of eating why aren't I out killing my food. Blah blah blah, "you eat like a Flintstone" Whatev. Others, are actually interested in what cool things I have to eat and is it good?  Normally it's women who are interested and guys are the ones that pick on me.  Trust me, I am not making this generalization up on my own.  :-) I can't say anything about the size of my meals because I frankly don't care, I am more pissed over the analyzing my meals.  I can't say I have ever picked on someone for what they are eating....and now I really wouldn't! LOL

 

My mantra that I say to myself when I am picked on is this, "Don't let others make you feel bad about you wanting to feel good."  It really does help, so pile your plate up with all the good foods you can eat and just smile knowing you are doing good for your body. 

[Natalie43]

I admit I felt odd yesterday sitting down to lunch of a big (delicious!) steak and salad, something I would have for dinner but never at lunchtime before. So much food! But I was at home alone so I didn't have to worry about being embarrassed. I've had leftover roast pork  and veges for breakfast in front of my husband and kids and that felt odd too. I guess we'll get used to it.

[Veggie Girl]

Nazza B, you are not alone.  Since I started Whole 30 I'm probably eating twice as much food as anyone else at the dinner table (husband and teenagers).  And I'm a small, relatively sedentary person.  My husband is muscular and outweighs me by about 60 lbs-- but his dinner looks tiny compared to mine and it makes me self conscious (although he's never said anything about it).   I've even been embarrassed about meals I've eaten by myself just due to the sheer size of them.  (Okay, that's only happened twice--one of them was a meal where I ate 8 ounces of compliant deli turkey for the protein portion of the meal template; another meal I ate two 5 ounce cans of tuna plus an egg for the protein portion.  With both of those meals I also had the usual starchy veg, regular veg, and fat, and I think one also had a fruit.  I was just listening to my body based on advice I got from others on the forum).  It seems strange to me to be eating so much food but I'm on day 29 and my clothes still fit fine. 

[NazzaB]

Yep, I'm definitely not getting any bigger!

[MrsStick]

I always tell people if they give me "the look" (you know the one...at your food, then at you, then at your food?) that they can have their *insert tiny "Food" thing they're eating for that meal* and you'll keep eating as much as you want of the right stuff and still not gain weight/lose weight/feel great/not be hungry.

 

Then again, I went to my lunchtime Bible study a few months back and didn't eat their sandwiches and chips for lunch. Instead, I had a 2 quart Pyrex mixing bowl chock full of salad (greens, tomato, cuke, maybe some peppers? don't remember exactly) with a homemade Balsamic vinaigrette (balsamic, EVOO, garlic powder, black and maybe white pepper), several slices of pot roast with a pineapple habanero marmalade on top, and some of their fruit salad. No one thought I could do it! I knew, though.

[megR]

I used to eat all my meals on  "luncheon" and salad plates,   I'm trying to retrain my teenage table setters that "mom needs a big plate now".  Even breakfast fills up a dinner plate!  All those cute little dishes I've purchased in the past to make my meals "seem" big are barely used anymore!   I've been feeling good, that is the best

[NazzaB]

Yep, I've been told many times to eat my meals on bread and butter plates. That's the size my meal should be!

 

Yesterday at work I sat down to my lunch of a dinner plate piled with greens, tomato, avocado and some left over baked chicken and I got the following comments from my male colleagues (no females commented).

 

1. "That's a lot of food! Are you pregnant?" (granted that comment was from a friend and I know he was just being provocative, it was still awkward)

 

2. "Whoa! Look at that!"

 

3. "Are you gonna eat all that?"

 

And this happens regularly.

 

 

Now do you see why I'm self conscious? Once again, it's not going to change my ways but it irks me.

[praxisproject]

I think they want to eat your food and hoping you're going to leave them some

[MrsStick]

I had two huge salads this week and my one gal classmate was like "Holy cow! That's a HUGE SALAD!" My first reaction was: it's a salad, who cares how big it is? I'm eating VEGGIES. Even YOU should think it's healthy, by your standards. And if I'm eating a salad, I want enough to actually fill me up! I'm pretty sure that's why people don't like salads - they never get a big enough one to actually be satisfying (or they use no-fat/low-fat dressing...ugh).

[Sam-I-Am]

I have been eating most of my meals at home but this topic reminded me of one of the times I've had to pack a lunch. Salads pack so well; they're my go-to packed meal right now. So when I was a week into the program I had my giant tub o'salad hidden in a dark bag under my desk (working in a live production environment; can't get away all too often). When everyone else was tucking into their turkey sandwiches and chips and cookies I busted out The Tub. Which happens to be bright shiny stainless steel too. One of my (male) coworkers, who apparently lacks verbal filters, blurted out, "That's huge! That just came out of nowhere! It's like a cooking pot. Where'd you get that, anyway?" And I, being the mature mother of two that I am, retorted, "From your mom's house."

 

So...while that's not a very professional response it definitely made everyone laugh and turned the attention away from GIANT SALAD OF DOOM.

 

That's really the only time I've felt self-conscious of a meal. Being pregnant and/or nursing for the last three and a half years, I've gotten used to needing a ton of food to carry myself and a baby or two through the day.

[SarahEM]

I can totally relate!!!

 

I eat my pre wo on the road, and then post wo, meal 1 and meal 2 at work, back home for meal 3. So when I leave in the morning I have a shopping back filled with my meals for the day divided up in different containers. My husband saw this and commented that there was no way I could eat all that food! Then I get to work and my coworkers see me eat my post wo meal, followed by meal 1 about an hour later. I work with all guys who have no filters and the comments keep rolling: eating again already?! Do you need to tell us something, is there  baby on board? You should start buying larger suits now with all that food.

 

Ugg. So annoying and totally makes me a bit self concious.

 

You are not alone!

[sjosey77]

I have been eating most of my meals at home but this topic reminded me of one of the times I've had to pack a lunch. Salads pack so well; they're my go-to packed meal right now. So when I was a week into the program I had my giant tub o'salad hidden in a dark bag under my desk (working in a live production environment; can't get away all too often). When everyone else was tucking into their turkey sandwiches and chips and cookies I busted out The Tub. Which happens to be bright shiny stainless steel too. One of my (male) coworkers, who apparently lacks verbal filters, blurted out, "That's huge! That just came out of nowhere! It's like a cooking pot. Where'd you get that, anyway?" And I, being the mature mother of two that I am, retorted, "From your mom's house."

 

So...while that's not a very professional response it definitely made everyone laugh and turned the attention away from GIANT SALAD OF DOOM.

 

That's really the only time I've felt self-conscious of a meal. Being pregnant and/or nursing for the last three and a half years, I've gotten used to needing a ton of food to carry myself and a baby or two through the day.

Sam, I literally bring a cooler (one that would hold a couple of 6 packs)to work with all my food in it and let me tell you, I get plenty of looks and comments about it.  I started hiding it under my desk so that people would stop commenting on it and so I wouldn't say something a little less witty and a bit more rude than you response.   I think it is so funny how people need to comment on others food choices.  It must be very boring at home for some of these people......  

[JJB]

So...while that's not a very professional response it definitely made everyone laugh and turned the attention away from GIANT SALAD OF DOOM.

 

 

Oh my gosh...that totally cracked me up. I feel a little self-conscious about my meal sizes at work too, but luckily no one has commented on it. I see my co-workers having protein bars or shakes for breakfast, tiny leftovers or microwave meals with no extra veggies for lunch, and maybe a little apple (or another protein bar) for a snack late in the day. I can hardly believe I used to live on that crap as well...so proud to be packing larger lunches with real food now! And lucky I don't work with jerks who have nothing better to do than judge my food choices too.

[amberino21]

Oh my gosh...that totally cracked me up. I feel a little self-conscious about my meal sizes at work too, but luckily no one has commented on it. I see my co-workers having protein bars or shakes for breakfast, tiny leftovers or microwave meals with no extra veggies for lunch, and maybe a little apple (or another protein bar) for a snack late in the day. I can hardly believe I used to live on that crap as well...so proud to be packing larger lunches with real food now! And lucky I don't work with jerks who have nothing better to do than judge my food choices too.

I feel sorry for the people who eat like that! I couldn't survive on so little food....

I was worse when I was eating 6-7 meals a day, often I'd have all but one meal in my cooler bag. I only half fill it now people comment on how much I eat, but also add bits about my size...I've even had someone in shock that I was going to eat all my lunch because apparently I'm anorexic (it was comp week, and I admit in clothes I look tiny but not worthy of that comment!). I find it partly funny, partly rude - they wouldn't comment if I was bigger again and sitting down to some junky food...