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Noelle

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That was AWFUL. I don't remember the last time I was so sick. The absolute worst part is that all four of us had it: my partner, our 6-year-old, the baby, and me. My guy and I have been together 10 years, and I've never known him to be so sick. This was also the first time the kids got something and didn't kick it within 24 hours.

 

On Wednesday, I couldn't keep anything down. Thursday was as far from eating good food as a person can get, I think: I drank water and ginger ale, and ate popsicles and Jell-O. I sneaked a hard boiled egg in there when my stomach started to calm down, but regretted it.

 

Yesterday, I felt better: completely exhausted and with an iffy belly, but ready to take on some food. My milk supply plummeted while I was sick. The baby and I got in a warm bath and nursed for about an hour, I'm drinking lots of water, and supplementing with oatmeal. If we were a little more flush with cash, I'd be taking fenugreek capsules. 

 

Yesterday's experiment with eating again:

 

B - 2 hard boiled eggs, unsweetened applesauce.

 

Snack - 1 cup ginger-pear kombucha, another hard boiled egg. 

 

Coconut-chia pudding with raisins.

 

L - Steel-cut oatmeal with 1/2 tsp raw honey, 1 Tbsp coconut milk, and half a banana.

 

Snack - Roast beef! (about 4 oz.)

 

D - Roast chicken (breast and thigh meat), baked sweet potato, sauerkraut. (Good to see you all again, friends!)

 

Unsweetened frozen strawberries, steel-cut oatmeal with 1/2 tsp raw honey.

 

* * *

 

This morning, I'm still feeling a little under the weather, but I had some spinach with breakfast—because it sounded good! Hallelujah, I'm on the mend!

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A few days of (involuntary) starvation due to illness, and now all bets are off! I had a small binge yesterday (do people without eating disorders think in terms of a "small binge"?) and a bigger one today. I probably only ate about 1000 calories during today's larger binge, but I didn't like the *way* I was eating.

I keep thinking of my ED behaviors as the last piece of the health puzzle--but I can't seem to make any of my other healthy changes stick longer than a few weeks. My ED recovery almost certainly has to be the *first* step--and I think it will be the hardest one.

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Okay. I'm doing a Whole7 to get my head back in recovery space. (I realized that during my most recent Whole30, I had no desire to binge/starve/compulsively exercise. I overrate a few times when I ate too quickly, but not in a way that disturbed me.) I started my day with eggs and spinach--with lots of my favorite coconut oil--and I'm feeling hopeful.

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Yikes. Don't start a WholeAnything with an empty fridge/pantry. I'm so glad tomorrow is grocery day. I'm only 2/3 the way through Day 2 of my Whole7, but already tired of chicken thighs, broccoli and eggs. Looking forward to some new protein!

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My back has been so sore lately. I don't know if it's from constant toddler-schlepping, or a bad flare-up, or both. Regardless, it's exhausting to be in pain all the time.

This weekend I'm hoping to sneak in some gentle exercise and see if I can get that ball rolling again.

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  • 1 month later...
  • 1 month later...

Just popping in to say things are going well as of right now. I finished Whole30 number whatever a couple weeks ago, gained a couple pounds this time around, got completely side-tracked with a planned meal out to celebrate my partner's birthday, and I'm slowly getting back on my bike now. It feels good. In fact, I think I'm doing better with the template now than I was when I was Whole30-ing. Go figure.

 

I don't feel like a success story by any stretch, but...my back pain has resolved!

 

I read John Sarno's book Healing Back Pain, and that alone did it. I'm following the guidelines Dr. Sarno outlines in the book, and it's making a world of difference.

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