Megan's 3rd Whole30

[Megan Frances Boyeas]

Ok, I'm starting another whole30 today. I have completed two so far (since last May), the most recent one being in January. However, even though I *totally know better*, this most recent time I relied so much on nuts, dried fruit and "paleo-fying" unhealthy choices that I didn't feel all the amazing results I felt during and after my first Whole30. So, I'm starting again. I'm excited about it, though, whereas the last one had me feeling trepidatious.

Things I'll Miss: Corn chips, So Delicious French Vanilla Coconut Creamer

Things I'm Stoked About: Solid sleep, no enegery-level sag at 3pm

Here we go!

Megan

[Tom Denham]

The awareness you're bringing to this third one is a real asset!

[Megan Frances Boyeas]

Hot damn, it's amazing how fast my resolve can falter! I was so pumped to start this Whole30 just 2 days ago but the minute I put any kind of restriction on myself, I immediately begin to notice and start to throw a tantrum! Last night I went to play Bingo with some friends and was seriously cranky that I couldn't have any wine. In the light of day I understand why it's not good for me (I sleep like crap, always make bad food choices, etc) but at night, when I'm feeling restless, it's all I can do to not indulge or spend the entire time thinking about indulging. I *almost* caved, knowing I could come on here, lie (or just omit the truth) and no one would know... except me! As my dad said, "you have to look at yourself in the mirror. No one can really care but you." It stuck with me and I didn't cave but I'm annoyed at how much I *wanted* to cave.... I will pat myself on the back for getting a healthy snack when I realized I wasn't going to be going straight home after work. It's super hard to eat on the go while on a budget. Guess I'm back to the days of carrying a fridge's worth of food with me everywhere!

Yesterday:

Breakfast: tuna salad (homemade mayo) and applesauce, coffee with coconut milk

Lunch: thai chicken cabbage wraps

Dinner: same as lunch

Snack: pastrami and an avocado

[Derval]

Well done on not caving. Giving up wine is hard.

[Megan Frances Boyeas]

Well.... that didn't go as planned.

I crashed and burned this weekend. By the end of the week, I found myself stressed and anxious and needing some relief. I wanted a reason to give up and I talked myself out of my Whole30 and jumped straight first into some wine and pasta. I feel terrible today. Not only do I feel awful physically- I woke up bloated, got crappy sleep, feel dizzy and dehydrated, have heartburn and a weird full/starving sensation- but I feel super guilty and mad at myself.

Do I start over? Do I take a break, keep eating clean without the pressure of a Whole30? I started one because I'd felt stuck for several weeks. I was tired, unhappy and generally just not getting the most out of my days. I thought I was ready for another reset. But a few days in I found myself anxious and annoyed that I "couldn't have stuff" and started justifying all the reasons a W30 isn't the right thing for me right now. "You can't live on a W30, so if you can only eat well when on one that's as bad as not being able to eat clean when off". I know that, in essence, that is a true statement (well, minus the "as bad as not eating clean" bit) but in my case, being removed from my choices last night, I know it's a total freaking cop out.

I've had major success with Paleo/W30/Clean eating in the past but when I get off those plans and try to live normally (following the 80/20 rule or allowing treats in) I just don't do well. I don't thrive with moderation.

My plan for today is to eat clean to try and let my tummy feel better and am going to head out for a run with my sister, to try and clear my head on this gorgeous Spring Portland day. As for tomorrow... well I don't know.

[Emily]

Do you think "can't have stuff" or do you think "I can do anything for 30 days." The 30 day limitation really helps me not feel deprived, although often I go over the 30 days once I hit them. It just helps me feel like I'm not deprived forever!

[Alyson Leahy]

Hey Megan,

I kind of just did the same thing...was going to complete a Whole15, due to a serious sugar/flour/alcohol overload one weekend. I made it for 5 days (well, kind of--I paleofied one item and did use some stevia); on day 4 I finally felt "normal" again. And on day 5 I made the decision to not continue with a strict Whole15. The Whole30 philosophy taught me so much, but ultimately I want to be a Paleo gal. The 80/20 rule really makes sense to me, too, and it sounds like it has worked for you in the past? I guess I just like the idea of having breads and treats as long as they are made with healthy alternatives. I live to bake, so if I had to give that up I'd go crazy!

I think you are smart to take it one day at a time, starting with a day of clean eating and a run. Sometimes if you start to think long-term, even just 30 days into the future, the idea becomes too big and scary. Don't beat yourself up about the alcohol and pasta, just think about how you will eat today. It seems like one has to really be in the right mindset to complete a second, third, etc. Whole30.