Fell off the wagon big time.

[Myra]

   

 

So, I had all good intentions when I started my first Whole 30 (and actually wanted to make it a Whole100) on April 1st.  It all went well for two weeks.  Then, I worked my second job on the weekend and drove around a lot and back and forth between the client's house (where I was pet sitting) and my own home (to take care of my own pets).  So I didn't eat much.  And then I craved sourdough bread.  And I bought it.  The entire weekend and Monday all I ate was bread with butter.  Oh, and an entire bar of chocolate.  I didn't even feel bad about it.  I went back on the wagon the next day, but then by the next weekend, it was hard again for me.

 

So since then I've been totally off the wagon and eat chocolate like a maniac.  And bread with butter!  I haven't eaten bread in ages as I'm not supposed to eat gluten due to an intolerance.  The first week (despite having had a headache for the first four days straight) I had so much energy.  That even improved during the second week.  And then - BANG! - willpower gone, boredom here - and I ate crap.

 

The plan is to get back on track May 1st and try it again.  I'm so busy with three jobs and school right now that it's hard to pre-cook and make a meal plan, but I have to manage to get this done - AND STICK TO IT!!!  Sometimes I leave my tupperware with the good stuff in our office fridge and still by crap at the grocery store next door or in our cafeteria.

 

I looked up meetings in my city of Overeaters Anonymus, but the more I read about it, the more I'm convinced it's not for me.  I attended one meeting once years ago and it didn't feel right for me.  Maybe I'll give it another try.

 

Okay, just wanted to share my failure.

I hope everybody else is doing much better.

 

If anybody has a tip for me how to stay on track, I'd be very grateful.

I'm not very happy with my main job, but cannot change it at the moment.  I feel once that is gone, I can breathe again and be happier, but that might take a while, and I cannot eat crap until then.

 

Cheers to all!

 

[GlennR]

It's not failure if you keep trying.

 

On the other hand, I wonder if you should hold off until things are a little less stressful for you. Ordinary life is hard enough without the added pressure of Whole30. And again, it's not failure; it's preparation. Because you can eat as clean as possible in the meantime (and not  be hard on yourself when you indulge) so that when you do start a Whole30, it wouldn't be as much of a leap over a chasm.

 

I know that the fact that I had been slowly changing my diet and getting past some stressful times the past year readied me for my Whole30 this month. I shudder to think if I had tried this a year ago. I would probably have been set back again and again.

[Tom Denham]

I've never been a member of Overeaters Anonymous, but I went to meetings with a friend for a while. And I've never been a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, but because I used to run alcohol and drug treatment programs and have lots of family members who are alcoholics, I have been to hundreds of AA meetings. I mention this to say, I know a lot about the 12-step world. You might want to give OA another chance. 

 

Some meetings are crap and it would be a shame to give up on the whole program because you did not go to enough meetings to be present when something really useful happened. And, when you are brand new, everything feels weird. It took me at least 10 AA meetings before I got semi-comfortable. I would encourage you to go to at least 10 OA meetings. And you might want to find OA at more than one location because some groups function better than others. 

 

Eating bread when you know you are gluten intolerant is an emotional issue and OA is useful for getting yourself to a better place where you deal with your emotions in a way that is not self-destructive. And you may want to get involved with OA and work the program for a while before attempting the Whole30. The structure of the Whole30 program can aggravate your issues with food and make it more tempting for you to binge. After you have worked on some things in OA, you are likely to find sticking to the Whole30 program a lot easier than it might be now. 

 

Another route would be to get some professional counseling, but that costs money AND many counselors think they know how to help with eating issues when they don't. I was one of them. I used to be a counselor, so I know. We read a few books and think we understand, but we are far from truly understanding the issues. You could find a professional counselor who would be really helpful, but OA is sure to connect you with people who really understand how to deal with these issues.

[Myra]

Thanks, GlennR and Tom!

 

I'm checking the OA meetings in my area and will give it a try. In the meantime, I'll try to give it my best and eat as clean as possible and try to get as much sleep as I can. The work stress will be another issue to take care of.

 

Thanks again for your support. I really appreciate it.

[AmieS]

Myra,

I work two jobs (one full and one partime) and attend school full time through an online univeristy.  I travel over 2 hours a day so fast food or unhealthy hand held food from home has been my go to in the past.  Even though I love healthy food too, junk food just seemed easier for my lifestyle.  Not only was I eating garabage everyday but I was also spending a lot of money on the unhealthy food.  I found by leaving my debit card at home when I could helped.  Since I did not have money on me to stop at a drive through, I was forced to wait until I got home to eat a healthier meal.  Also I packed healthy lunches and had no choice to eat them even when I wish I could join my co-workers in the cafeteria for pizza and burgers.  Also it is make it a ritual every Sunday night to make food for the week.  It becomes a habit to do it and I make it fun by cranking up music while I pretend to be a chef.  Your body will thank you for the healthy food you give it even if your tastebuds put up a fight at first.  It does get easier though and it is so worth it! Good Luck, you are obviously a hard working individual so you are stronger than you think!