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Taking the summer off midwifery to get my body back.


Surfista

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Hi everyone.  i've been on a health recuperation weight loss journey for 2 and half years.  I was formerly a very fit semi-pro snowboarder, division I gymnast, etc. But with all that great muscle memory and athleticism came eating disorders and lack of true hunger awareness.  Over the past couple years I have been doing Myfitness Pal, hired a trainer, of recent, battled injuries and whatnot.  The result was 25 pounds lost but these last few weeks my old crazy eating patterns have sprung up. In the name of losing my "last 10 pounds" I have gotten pretty dysfunctional and that's why I'm here.  Giving up the scale, MFP, calorie counting etc. I am hoping this won't be too hard of a transition as I usually eat less than 125 carbs a day…  

 

So I am taking the summer off my work as a midwife with the goal of getting lean and fit and finally arriving at a normal body weight. I also would be interested in using this program for my clients. And I certainly couldn't recommend it without doing it, right?  

 

Here we go…..

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Good on you recognising your disordered eating (because trust me, counting every gram that goes in your mouth is disordered!) and trying to do something about it. I hope you find it really freeing.

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This program is simple.  Just remember not to overcomplicate it.  Eat a palm or two of protein, a thumb-size (or more, way more if desired) of fat, and fill a large plate with veggies (2-3 cups or so).  Do that three times a day.  Bada bing, bada boom.

 

Whole30 is not low-carb, and is not about counting carbs, so don't confuse it with a low-carb diet.  It ain't.  Eat your carbs.

 

Happy eating, you're gonna be doing a lot of it!  Enjoy!

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I had the most fabulous breakfast…   Broccoli sautéed in free range turkey fat, two poached backyard eggs and a few ounces of smoked black cod, all topped with coconut curry sauce and black pepper.  Washed down with some coffee and coconut milk. WOW! Who needs pancakes?!!

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Thanks for the tips on the carb/low carb.  The three meal structure sounds wonderful. I was doing a fitness model diet before with 6 mini meals and I think that was another thing driving me crazy. Too much time in the kitchen and logging the aforementioned series of snacks. 3 meals sounds quite peaceful in comparison.

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M1- 2 eggs, coconut milk, sablefish, broccoli fried in turkey fat

M2- canned silver salmon, coconut milk, shredded cabbage

M3-1/2 cantaloupe

M4- Turkey bone broth with meat, cauliflower, cauliflower greens, lettuce, vinaigrette

 

I passed out at 1 pm and took a two hour nap.  Big time withdrawals from emergenC, from recovery drinks and protein shakes.

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I did 5 meals a day too - seriously, all I did was think about food - what to pack, when I could eat again, how many grams of XYZ were in it! I was a headcase (and I clearly wasn't very good at it as I didn't lose much weight, adding to my mentalness!)

 

Coconut curry sauce on eggs sounds awesome!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Days 1-6 were invigoration and pleasurable.  Days 7-11 were pure fiery-snappy-angry-Kill. All. Things.  Days 12-13 I hit a wall of depression.  Weighed myself on day 13.  Could.Not.Resist.  It was more tempting than any sugary desert or carby processed fried treat. I had been dying to know for days, afraid that I was losing too much weight, that I really need to lose 20 more pounds, not 10…  All kinds of insanity regarding my body image has been my challenge.  I was already eating pretty clean coming into this and I have realized that my body image now is actually worse now than when I was a competitive gymnast. Now that is saying something. I have a lot of work to do in this department. 

 

I just finished day 14. Today was not as squeaky clean as days past. I ate some lunch meat and some canned tuna that were not 100% compliant. I'll clean it up tomorrow but for now I'm not going to dwell on perfectionism. I have completed these two week amongst caring for two extra kids, 3 families worth of house guests, road trips, fishing excursions and all the work and stress related to these kinds of distractions and disruptions of my schedule.  Late nights processing fish, long days with relatives that eat junk…  I feel really proud to have made it this far. 

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Oh, and I am not starting this bastard 30 days again.  Ever.  Not going to blow it.  I have toyed around with starting and restarting "days of abstinence" in 12 step food programs and it was painful.  I am not messing around.  

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Good for you! And just think, starting in the morning, you are over 1/2 way there! You can do this!

That scale sure is hard to give up, isn't it? I never thought of it like a food craving (wanting the scale back more than some potato chips), but it's so true!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Day 25 and it's been one of the hardest. I attended a 30 hour labor/delivery/clean up with only a 2 hour break and a 2 hour nap in there. The outcome wasn't ideal so I had a lot of emotional disappointment/anger…..couple that with exhaustion I just wanted to eat chocolate, a mega muffin and a latte. Later several cocktails and a pile of pitas and fried food was calling my name.  Instead I stayed on track. After all, I have come THIS far!  Why quit now?

 

Instead:

 

M1-  lamb steak and zuccini

M2-  pecans and dates

M3-  giant spinach salad with halal kebab

 

Phew… I made it!  

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By the way I can't tell you how amazing my body looks.  Someone said today if I lost anymore weight i would look gross.  Now that's an exaggeration because I am at the very tippy top of the height/weight range for normal.  But it still was kinda shocked since I been losing weight very, very slowly since October and almost no one has noticed any changes until the last couple of weeks.  

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By the way I can't tell you how amazing my body looks.  Someone said today if I lost anymore weight i would look gross.  Now that's an exaggeration because I am at the very tippy top of the height/weight range for normal.  But it still was kinda shocked since I been losing weight very, very slowly since October and almost no one has noticed any changes until the last couple of weeks.  

 

If someone told me I would look gross in any way shape or form, I would be giving them a piece of my mind! No-one has the right to comment on your body in that way! Perhaps they were coming from a place of concern (given your admitted dysfunctional history), but that is no way to ever speak to another human being.

 

OK, rant over - good on you for sticking with the plan despite what sounds like a horrible day. The junk food wouldn't have made you feel any better about events, but they would have impacted your progress.

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