LauraC Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 5 weeks ago I started reading Louise Hay's "You Can Heal Your Life". In that time I have found a lot of peace. 2 weeks ago I sat in a party and for the first part in my life I thought "I don't care what I weigh, but I care that I look as well as I can". It was after that that I realised I both want, and deserve, to feel better. I have been fighting with myself for too long, it's time to stop now. I will weigh myself in the morning for record but I am not hung up on the number. I did my first Whole30 in January 2012 and got myself into ISWF for my efforts... I just didn't keep those efforts up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 We can do this. It's not about weight. That's a lovely side effect. It's about our heads. And sometimes are heads are the heaviest part of our bodies. If I could just take it off every now and then, I know I would feel much lighter. You know what I mean? The head games I put on myself are really making me less than I can be. Very self-destructive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted July 31, 2014 Author Share Posted July 31, 2014 The head games I put on myself are really making me less than I can be. Very self-destructive. I have lived with a negative dialogue all of my life. I have been without it for 5 weeks now and I keep checking to see what is wrong, what is missing and then I remember that it is the absence of a constant stream of negativity and MAN ALIVE I do not miss it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 I need to get a little space between one negative period and the absence of negativity but I'll get there. Yeesh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted July 31, 2014 Author Share Posted July 31, 2014 Day 0 We travelled home from friends today at lunch time and after lots of "mamma, what can I have to eat?" I pulled into McDonalds Dinner was paleo chilli (I don't know how to make a non paleo chilli ) so I have lunch for tomorrow already. The kids and I went to the grocery store this afternoon and got some basics, including coconut oil. My boyfriend and I drew up a 14 day meal plan recently so I am going to put in subtitles with my dinner on the days it is not a W30 dinner. The next step is to do some slow cooker pulled meat that I can put in my freezer. @derval where is that pulled Hawaiian pork recipe that you had to go to Fallon & Posho to get pink salt for? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 Nom nom paleo laura. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 1, 2014 Author Share Posted August 1, 2014 Welcome to August It's an "in morning" in our house today and I got a lie in! Breakfast was more like brunch but it was clean and I am proud I weighed myself and was pleasantly surprised to discover that I am not as heavy as I thought I was and delighted that there was no internal criticism about the weight that I am. Brunch: 3 egg omelette with kale, yellow pepper and mushroom, a glass of water & black coffee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 1, 2014 Author Share Posted August 1, 2014 Dinner: Baked cod with actifry chips and a mixed salad with avocado & TCMTG mayo It was yummy and I am comfortably full. I did well not eating gum & drinking Diet Coke. The hard part starts in about an hour when I sit down to hang out with himself for a little while... with no food and no Diet Coke Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 2, 2014 Author Share Posted August 2, 2014 Good Day 2 Breakfast was left over chilli with a fried egg on the top. I am in the middle of a giant cook up of meat sauce. Himself and the kids are having lasagne (and I am making more for the freezer) and I am having meat sauce and sweet potato wedges. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted August 2, 2014 Share Posted August 2, 2014 Is meat sauce same as bolegnase? I made double batch today too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinman57 Posted August 2, 2014 Share Posted August 2, 2014 Is meat sauce same as bolegnase? I made double batch today too. Yup! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 2, 2014 Author Share Posted August 2, 2014 Is meat sauce same as bolegnase? I made double batch today too. Yes I bought so much mince I didn't have a pot big enough. I made lasagne for all of them... dairy free for the boys, cheesy for himself. Oh, I made mayo yesterday too I think I might crush some chilis and mix them into some mayo tonight so I have mayo with some kick tomorrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 2, 2014 Author Share Posted August 2, 2014 To Makes: Breakfast frittata Guacamole Chili mayo Sweet potato, apple & chorizo hash Baked eggs in prosciutto Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 3, 2014 Author Share Posted August 3, 2014 Day 3: I woke this morning hungry. I can't remember when that happened the last time. It was such a nice feeling. I wasn't starving or wall falling. I just knew it would be time to eat soon. I made sweet potato, apple, and chorizo hash with a fried egg on top. It was yummy and my internal furnace has TURNED ON! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 3, 2014 Author Share Posted August 3, 2014 Today was a great day. It was raining so the kids and I went for a walk in the basement. I told them that we had to stay down there for 2500 steps. At 1800 we realised it was not raining any more so we did another 2000 topside. They are kids so they loved walking at the pace I learned to walk at in university (which himself CANNOT keep up with ) We climbed on walls and walked around the edge of the waterless water feature in the complex. A great time was had by all. For dinner we had roast lamb with roasted vegetables (cooked under the lamb) and Actifry roasted potatoes. It was a success. My tummy is less bloated and I think I have come to the end of the "I shouldn't travel too far away from a toilet" feeling that I was having at the middle of the week (before I started my W30) I cannot get over the absence of a negative dialogue in my head. For years, probably my whole life (with the exception of the 18 months after my second baby was born and the year after I left my husband) I have a background negativity that overshadowed everything. At the end of June a friend suggested I read "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay and the negativity went away. In the time since then I have lost my job, had to deal with my deadbeat estranged husband, had my kids at home full time and my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Through all of that I didn't binge eat once, if anything in the run up to my W30 my appetite had dialled right down. It was as though I didn't have the negative voice so there was no reason to comfort eat. My older boy and I have decided we are going to get our apartment into shape before he goes back to school in 25 days. We are going to use the plan that @Derval linked to in another W30 log... http://moneysavingmom.com/2012/11/4-weeks-to-a-more-organized-home-simplified-day-1.html'>4 weeks to a more organised home Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 4, 2014 Author Share Posted August 4, 2014 Another great day We slept late, which was nice. I had steamed potatoes last night and made a Spanish omelette for Family Breakfast today. It was yummy (I had mine with half an avocado) but it didn't get me through to lunch The kids and I went to the local park and walked the perimeter which was lovely but wild and steep. My FitBit gave me 18 flights of stairs for the steep hills. WHOOT! We planned on 3000 steps and did a little over 4000 which was very nice. Lunch was leftovers. Fish from Friday and veg & potatoes from yesterday. The veg had been cooked in the lamb drippings and there was a delicious layer of animal fat in the veg container today Dinner was salad which I didn't feel like eating until 8 this evening. My stomach is upset with lots of rumblings. I was tired in the middle of the day and had a lie down with my 5 year old. There was no chance of me sleeping but the rest was appreciated. I made the chilli mayo yesterday. I had a taste earlier and thought "meh, nothing special. About 45 seconds later the chilli hit the back of my tongue and BOOM! the mayo is GOOD!! We got started on Day 1 of the 4 week plan to get organised. The tall boy picked up the sitting room floor & vacuumed. The small boy helped with the laundry. I forgot how nice it feels when I don't poison my body. I am missing Diet Coke and chewing gum less than I expected. I started doing some yoga today. Let's just say I am not as pretty, lean or flexible as the woman on the app but I did OK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 5, 2014 Author Share Posted August 5, 2014 I am SOOOOOO tired today. It was my first day in work since last Tuesday and it is an hour drive away. This morning I wanted to weigh myself. I wanted to see the number. I feel better. My tummy is flatter. 39.5 years (today) of life have taught me that that means I MUST SEE THE NUMBER!# I didn't weigh myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kmlynne Posted August 5, 2014 Share Posted August 5, 2014 Just think how much more exciting it will be when you get to day 30 if you don't peek now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 5, 2014 Author Share Posted August 5, 2014 I know Karen. I am good with not looking. It was neat to feel the feeling and realise what the thought was behind it. I have lived a life of "a diet is a success if the number goes down" but today I am living "what I eat is a success if I continue to heal myself". Today was a tiring but good day Breakfast: 3 egg, spring onion & tomato omelette (lots of oil used and the pan was dry at the end) Lunch is at 12.30 when I am working so I was mindful not to overload my breakfast. My tummy gave that "I am going to need food in about 15 or 20 minutes" feeling and when I looked up it was 12.20. Whoot! Lunch: salad with smoked salmon, sliced ham, chili mayo and half an avocado. Dinner: Tacoless tacos with half and avocado and mayo. As I said earlier, I am beat down tired! I think it was a combination of the driving (although I am well used to that), the fact that I left my jar of coffee in the first office I worked in this morning and the fact that it is day 5. I am so happy today It is my half birthday and I didn't wake this morning and think "I am going to be 40 in 6 months and I really should start doing something about what I am eating" (which is how I started the 5th day of lots of other months this year). That is a great feeling Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted August 5, 2014 Share Posted August 5, 2014 Happy 39.5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 6, 2014 Author Share Posted August 6, 2014 Thanks :-) Today was an odd day. I had a 2 hour kid appointment that turned into a 3 hour appointment so at the end I was hungry. Breakfast: 3 eggs baked in prosciutto with caramelised onion & fried mushrooms. Lunch: wedges of red pepper with a dollop of mayo wrapped in smoked salmon. Dinner: meat sauce with a spoonful of coconut oil mixed in. My food choices were influenced by the stressful day I had but I kept it clean. That day last week would have involved eating too much of the bad stuff and feeling worse. Today is cycle day 1 and I'm feeling ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 9, 2014 Author Share Posted August 9, 2014 The internet has now swallowed 3 posts The last 3 days have been stressful but food has been clean. I need to get more sleep, but it has been like that for a while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 13, 2014 Author Share Posted August 13, 2014 I have had a rough few days, heading on for a week at this stage I am eating clean, albeit with a severely diminished appetite. I make myself eat most days. It is interesting that with all of the stress I haven't craved anything non W30. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted August 13, 2014 Share Posted August 13, 2014 Sorry things are so hard for you right now Laura, hope things settle & look up soon.Well done staying on track Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraC Posted August 15, 2014 Author Share Posted August 15, 2014 I love my pressure cookers. I have a 2L & a 5L that a friend brought back from India for me. Today I made perfectly cooked baby potatoes in 7 minutes. Cooked only in steam. They were yummy. As with when I was eating paleo all the time I have started IF overnight & into the next day but not intentionally. I fast for about 16 hours each day. I eat well in the other 8 to make up for it ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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