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Worrying about Other People's Food (for me, not my kid lol)


Kate C  Mayone

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Hi All,

 

Today is day 59 for me and I plan to finish out the week of my 2 month adventure.  Halloween will technically be my last day but I plan on gently easing myself back into reintroduction.  I'm excited and nervous all the same.  I feel like I've found a definite rhythm to my meal planning and eating.  I've kept a thorough daily journal of all my food, trips to the bathroom, and notes on how I'm feeling.  What a wealth of knowledge!  I feel like I finally 'figured this all out' this time around.  I feel amazing and I don't want that to stop.  But I want a realistic approach for reintroduction.  I've read the section in the book and I feel confident I can keep my new life as long as I want it.  I'm expecting slip-ups and I'm not holding myself to any model of perfection.  Just a clean and healthy life that keeps me feeling good.  

 

The biggest thing I feel standing in my way is - other people's food.  I've had such a great experience cooking my way thru the last 59 days.  Yes, it's been a bit time consuming and expensive...but totally doable.  I've dined out only three times though and brought leftovers to social get-togethers.  It's all worked out while keeping myself on track.  What I've noticed the seldom times I've eaten anyone else's food is it's pushed me further away into this box of "I only want to eat MY food".  I'm sure I'm not alone here.  I love cooking for several reasons but I realize it's a control issue.  I don't think I'm the world's best home cook but the thought of letting someone else prepare a dish and put it in front of me makes me anxious.  I'm not paranoid someone is trying to poison me but I've loved not having to worry about what's in things or if I'll suffer for eating them. I just want to eat real food!  My best friend wants to cook me a 'healthy' dinner for my birthday this weekend.  The thought of it alone puts a pit in my stomach.  I just don't want it! 

 

Yes, I will admit there is also an element of superiortity here.  I probably need to come down a bit off my high horse.  Mostly, I just have a hard time with the idea of reintroduction to other people's food.  My general feeling is that is that I should take small steps.  Obviously, if I don't want to eat something I shouldn't.  But I also need to ease up a bit.  I do plan to reintroduce a few items like dairy and certain grains to see how my body responds.  I plan to stay away from processed foods - namely refined sugar.

 

For those of you that share this perspective what has worked for you during reintroduction?  How are you balancing control while transitioning into The Real World? 

 

Thank you!!  

 

 

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First of all, congratulations on completing 59 days!

 

I understand your plight.  I pretty much feel this way anytime I finish a whole 30.  Please remember that a whole 30 should not be a security blanket.  At some point you have to venture out into the world again.

 

This is why re-intro's are so important. I slow rolled mine as well - knowing full well that I had issues with many foods.  Now when I eat at other people's houses or if I go out for dinner, I know what to advise them what I won't eat. I don't expect people to comply to my every whim, but I do know that people will try to build a meal to meet my requirements.  If they forget or miss something I shrug and eat it anyway - except if it is dairy.  Dairy is not really worth it for me in any way shape or form.  I suffer consequences for weeks with a dairy exposure.  I know this now. 

 

My rule of off roading is:  eat whole 30 at home.  Eat as close to whole 30 when eating out, but relax if your meal isn't "perfect"  Sometimes hosts will misunderstand and consider that lentils/beans are vegetables. I will politely eat one or two spoonfuls, then leave it alone.  

 

  If you really want something genuine really bad, like for instance Pad Thai, at a really good quality Thai restaurant - go forth and eat up.  Enjoy every bite.  And know that the next few days you might feel a little less than phenomenal.  That's fine.  you made that choice and you have accepted the consequences.  But only you can make those choices to relax. 

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Thank you both!  The slow roll reintroduction sounds like my best plan to take it easy but still make my way 'out there'.  I agree that W30 shouldn't be my security blanket and in many ways has so it's time to shed it.  I think that's what I need to remind myself most.  Eating W30 at home and close to W30 when out is a good rule of thumb.  And there are obvious foods for me that aren't worth reintroduction like legumes and most grains.  I still want to be polite to friends when they offer to have me over for dinner, etc.  But I also feel like a recovery addict who doesn't want to hang out with their old drinking buddies...is that crazy?  Probably not.  I need draft up an escape plan so to say and be prepared.  Since most people knew I was doing this for 60 days some are waiting on the sidelines for me to be "fun" and "normal" again.   <_<

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Your reintroduction then, will give you the knowledge to explain to others exactly why you aren't reverting to "normal". Imagine being able to say "I had a huge energy slump at 2pm, turns out this only happens when i eat dairy so I'm keeping that out for good" (or your own personal experience).

 

Your listener may just turn around and say "I wonder what it would be like to not have a 2pm energy slump, I might give this whole30 thing a go..."

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