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The "Return of the Dirty Thirty" 12 January start date


dcducks1

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That's right! We are back and with a vengeance. I will be your host for a lovely adventure to get you thru the winter blues (forget those stupid NY resolutions).....we are aiming for fun and success. If you want to lose weight, feel great, meditate, levitate....don't hesitate...this is the group for you. You will need a few things. First....a $5000 check made out to me......2nd......some thick skin....3rd....a good sense of humor.......and 4th and final item.....a strong conscience which will keep you faithful and honest TO YOURSELF! This group is not for quitters or cry babies....we understand the occasional rant from a bad day.......but we want to see you heal and grow from the inside out. NO SCALES simply means NNNNOOOOO   SSSCCCAAALLLEEESSS!!!!!!!!!! Its only 30 days....after that you can eat your scale if you want. Meet me here on Monday.....don't forget your 4 essential items (especially the check)......and we will get started on our great adventure!

 

Dave

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Nanny D.......I sent that at least a month ago and I know you cashed it. It's almost time to swing like monkeys, swim like fish, dance like wolves....(hump like rabbits maybe......depending on your circumstances and state and federal regulations) and fly like eagles! Sissy....I will cordially introduce you to the group once your check has cashed. Please feel free to "unofficially" introduce yourself to the group over the next few days. We will have a main goal which will be to "FEEL BETTER". That can be from allergies, aches, pains, strains, moans, groans, weight, the way clothes fit, the way your car leans when you are in it, the way your scale screams "one at a time, PLEASE!" We are going to become the second strongest standing army on the planet! We will be relentless with our focus and goals! We will NOT waiver, we will not bow to any urges or addictions! We will become one unstoppable force which will continue to evolve over the course of a month....becoming leaner.....and meaner......more sculpted, sexy, healthy, and fabulous! We will walk away after a month with a mental understanding of what it takes to MAINTAIN this lifestyle that WE have just GIVEN to OURSELVES! It is our own gift to us! We will have members give us cooking tips and food choices while others give us laughter, visual stimulation, poetry, inspirational quotes, comfort, understanding, a helping hand, a kick in the ass, and chores. What we WILL NOT have is EXCUSES! We will play nice and we will hold ourselves to the highest accountability.

And what will there be at the end of this crusade?...........clothes strewn around the floor and closet.......all of us searching for a damn pair of pants that will not fall off our taught buttocks! We will see pantries stripped of our Oreos and Cheetos, replaced with food that was NOT designed to kill us at an early age. We will have game plans when we eat out on the town or at a friends place.....because, lets face it........nobody likes the picky/healthy eater.......annoying! But we will prevail......and the skies will part and the sun will shine and we......we will be even more beautiful than we already are! So......step right up....get your tickets....there is limited seating and we do not take reservations!

 

Dave  

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Laurie checking in.  I am starting on Wednesday, January 7.

 

Looking forward to another 30 days with the most amazing people.  I miss the closeness that we all shared.  I hope everyone from our original group will be playing along.

 

Hello  Dave, Sissy, Nanny and Meadow!

Welcome Tonya!

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WOOT!  The Chief is back!  About dang time, too - all kinds of mayhem has (possibly) been going on for the last few weeks due to err, umm, something to do with the holidays…. at least in my case.

 

I am really happy that the old gang - and the newcomers! - are uniting here for Dirty Thirty, the Triquel.  I've missed you all!

 

I started my Whole30 (maybe 60) today.  I confess I have been OFF THE RAILS for the last many weeks and I can really, really tell a difference.  Meadow, I kept thinking about you and your slow roll reintros, and intend that for myself with this next go round.  This will be my fourth Whole30 since June, and I know the program isn't intended that way.  I do so much better with a strict program, so for me this round really has to be about instilling lifelong habits and finding a way to adopt moderation.

 

I am TWO runs away from finally completing my Couch to 5k, so there's that bit of progress.  No more 80's punk rock reunion tours to report on since last we met, but I'm happy to announce that Edgar the cat caught and brought home a squirrel yesterday.  Otherwise things here on the farm are pretty quiet.  The holidays pretty much sucked but that's a story for another time.  I'm just thrilled to get some equilibrium back.

 

Much love to you all.  Yay Team W30!

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I see a lot of greatness in this group.  Lots of old friends and new friends.  ChiggerCane is my friend for several years from another forum and Augie, is my accountability buddy - we met on the December whole 30.  Granny D and jesslight - nice to meet you.

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Well well well......Higs has come home to roost! Glad to hear the farm is well and critters are still being laid at your feet. I am excited for your upcoming 5K....we will get you there....and BEYOND!

 

Laurie - thanks for noticing the greatness but try to notice the other people in the group also. I am only JUST a man! I'm not conceited...I'M CONVINCED!

 

Granny D - I usually don't allow two people in the same group that have names that rhyme but we will give it a try. The first time you make any trouble......you are out on your ear! Welcome!

 

Augie Doggie - we don't LOOK like a fun group....WE ARE! We are also socially unacceptable, overly descriptive of bodily functions, a bit mental, overly enthused by dirty humor,....and I'm just talking about Miki! Welcome!

 

ChiggerCane - I'm noticing a dog theme with you and Auggie so I am going to have to ask that you please show proof that your dogs are up to date with all of their shots! Welcome!

 

Jeslight - you are going to need to change your name to JesLight...er! Prepare for a great 30 days!

 

Laurie - so glad to see you back girl. Hope everything is going well! We ARE amazing and you are a big part of why!

 

Tonya - Welcome. Please make check payable to me!

 

MeadowLily - our ray of sunshine is with us again and will fill our pages with goodness.

 

So, most of you have sent your checks in which is great! Please stop making them out to "Lap Dances". This makes my wife ask a lot of questions. We are 6 days from our "jump off" point and need to spend the next few days getting our mind right! This should not be a time of "binging" to see how much CRAP we can eat before we have to be good. Start getting the holiday garbage out of the house. All of the cookies and candy, fudge, cake, and excessive amounts of food need to GO! This is a new year and will become a new YOU! Good health was never gained by eating Cheetos! Damn I wish it was! Anyway........that reminds me of a great Cheetos joke but it's dirty and we need to get to know each other better. Ask me later!

 

Many of you who know me know that I have a motor that never stops. I do have an abnormal amount of energy and it will be hard ....maybe impossible to keep up. I have some good news for you though. I had a surgery three weeks ago which has slowed me down considerably and will have another one in February which should also bring me down beneath the speed of sound. Not to worry........I am just having body parts removed that are not needed or ones that I can make more aerodynamic for more speed in the future. I sold my gall bladder on eBay last week for $8 bucks. Trying to get bids on a kidney and a frontal lobe.

 

Anyway......put on your stretchy pants, an old work shirt, grab some gloves and boots. We are going to get "DIRTY"! I want you to think about when you were small children. Do you remember going to school with your mom or dad's shirt for art class. You got to wear it backwards when you painted and it was so big that it almost went to your feet. But you could get as messy as you wanted because in the end.....you would have created a masterpiece that was worthy of the family refrigerator. As we travel thru these next thirty days.......your clothes will begin to feel like that shirt....getting bigger and bigger. And we will make a mess.....and be dirty......but the masterpiece will be YOU!

 

Dave 

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I don't spend much time contemplating the big picture  concept of a life without comfort food  because that sounds friggin' insanely terrible.   But every day I make a decision not to eat Cheetos or _____, fortunately with every day that goes by that decision does get easier.

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GOOD MORNING!

 

I'm still getting the hang of things, I'm on day 5. BUT ... I SO want to get down and dirty!! Oh and $5000 is a small price to pay. Palpal sent your way dcducks  :D

 

I'm looking forward to some good kick-ass and motivation to carry me along this 30 (maybe 60??!!) days.

 

WOOT!!

Dawn

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Dawn and Mel - thanks for the quick payment. Your Dirty 30 hooded sweatshirts will be embroidered and shipped to you within the next week. Hopefully they will arrive before your new car arrives and the free UNLIMITED airline travel tickets. We will probably start our journey staying in the warm Caribbean so pack lightly and be ready to arrive on one of the islands on Monday.

 

Meadow - make sure you have the island scenery ready for the Monday start.

 

We will NOT have Deb with us on this journey so I will want someone to step up and have good "island" recipes ready for the group. DONT MAKE ME PICK SOMEONE! If you volunteer it makes everyone's life less painful.

 

Start making your shopping list and buy your stuff this weekend. Make sure it's compliant and ask questions in advance. Start making your salad dressings, mayo, BBQ sauces this weekend......it DOES make things easier!

 

Remember - your $5000 up-front fee was to get you in the group. This does not cover food, travel, or entertainment expenses over the next 30 days. This DOES NOT BUY MY FRIENDSHIP! Friendship rates can be sent to you if so required and a daily/weekly/monthly/yearly payment plan can be arranged. Your $5000 fee is not tax deductible!

 

This is the only group that charges a fee and it is because of the quality of guidance and goodness that is provided. You should not have any expectations during this journey and therefore, will not be disappointed. In addition, I can almost guarantee that NOT ALL if this money will be used for drugs, alcohol, gambling, or adult entertainment! Don't judge me....it's too early for that....wait until next week!  

 

Dave

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Hey - I want a hoodie too! My check is in the mail. Really!

 

Thanks for the reminder on the salad dressings, mayo and sauces. You are most correct - it does make it easier!

 

Looking forward to a 1/12/15 start with y'all.

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Sissy - uh.....your envelope contained a coupon for Preparation H. It was a Buy One Get One Free. I'm not saying I can't use it, but it falls a little bit short of the $5000 entrance fee. You have until Monday......this isn't a threat.......but I might know somebody who knows somebody who knows how to bust knee caps.....just sayin'

 

Dave

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Dave - I'll send a new check. Hope it doesn't need to have a signature. Maybe you could grant a one-time waiver - to let me 'in' prior to receiving payment? 

Pretty please, with sug - umm with healthy, compliant things on top!?  :)

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Sissy - begging is not required! I received your check. Stow your luggage and find a seat. Keep the noise down and introduce yourself to the group. Don't talk about liking puppies, long walks along the beach, warm snuggles with cocoa, or anything like that. That is forbidden! Higs usually talks about dead animals being brought to her by her cat so that subject is covered too. Meadow covers ....well......just about everything. Miki ......you haven't met her yet....she talks about walking goats, which is extremely weird, wild blind dates, and tennis.....but anyway......those subjects are taken also. I don't think "strategies at Chinese Checkers" has been taken.............. 

 

We have been "soft" for too long......that's why we are here! The next 30 days is going to be hard.......but that's what you paid all that money for. I will get every dollar out of you......and you of me!

 

Dave  

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What's everyone's ABSOLUTE FAVORITE go-to Whole30 meal??

 

And favorite recipes for bbq sauce would be AWESOME?! ?! I tried one once over a year ago and I think its still sitting in my fridge...  :ph34r:

 

Also, I'm SO GRATEFUL to have been mostly paleo before starting on the 1st. No headaches at all, no miserable side effects yet, I'm just looking forward to getting some amazing sleep and waking up bright and early with lots of energy... and being JesLight-er-er!! For those of y'all tempted to binge prior to the start day, I recommend doing the opposite and suffer less for it! 

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Thanks Dave for letting the rhyming name thing slide. You should have gotten my check by now. I'm not as old as my name implies so I think I remember filling it out completely. This is my 3rd Whole 30...I am ready to get to work! The holiday sugar bug definitely bit me bad and it needs to go. Around here just as soon as the holidays are over it's time for Mardi Gras (and King Cake) and then Easter. The merry go round has to stop! I love the Caribbean so I am ready for the sights and sounds.

JesLight-er, one of my favorite all time w30 meals is Korean Short Ribs from NomNom Paleo! Time consuming but very worth it!

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Geminimik here, also known as Miki and more recently my nickname has become Hurricane. I was one of the original 69ers, later dubbed the dirty 30. I've strayed quite far in the last few months so looking forward to getting back to ultimate health and then staying a bit closer to home as I do reintro. I already know what I'm sensitive to and how great I feel when I'm whole 30 compliant. Ordered my Tessamae hot sauce, getting ready to make some Meyer lemon mayo, Chicken with  veggies, veggies soup etc.

 

I'm looking forward to Daves cleaning mania, hearing Bear Wisdom, GOAT WALKS, right higs? Then there are those amaing Italian men that Rosann brings to the table, not to mention rick and cassandra, Laurie, I need an update...I' know I'm missing tons of you but will try to focus on one of you at a time and get to know you.

 

I will also try to arrange a few blind dates so I have some decent horror stories, I do have a few stored up...lucky you.

 

Okay, see you all Monday.

 

Dave, try not to burn us out the first week. I'll have my dirty martini this week in prep for abstinence...will  you have a date with the Captain?

 

hugs and good health to all.

 

Hurricane

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