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overcoming disordered eating


healthy eater

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Today is day 1. I admit I am a food addict and powerless over processed foods. When I eat them I can't stop. I binged on processed foods then threw up 'cause I was stuffed and ashamed. I've successfully eaten "Paleo" in my past and have been relieved from binge eating. I am ready to do this again. I want to be free from food controlling my life.

 

I am not so concerned with my weight, but want a healthy mind, body and spirit. I know physiologically processed foods create a craving of more. Since I have an addictive personality, I believe that it's best to abstain from these foods so I can be free from an unhealthy bingeing cycle. I want to be the best person I can be. When I am stuffing myself with cupcakes, Wheat thins, or other processed junk foods, I am not being my best self.

 

I went for a nice long walk today with my dogs and listened to "It Starts with Food." I am ready to commit (although I had crappy coffee creamer in my coffee this morning before making decision) but I'm committing to no more processed foods for today. I am very excited and happy to share my journey. Thanks for reading. I know I need a supportive community and am grateful for my journey with all of you!!!

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Thanks for the suggestions. I will go for 31 days which will really be 30 and have changed my name to healthy eater. Don't know if I should post all the food I eat daily.  I will start posting my food tomorrow, but today has been really great. I'm a little anxious about no coffee creamer. I've used coconut oil before so I guess I'll just do it again! The hardest time for me is night time snacking. My old best friend was peanut butter and we broke up today, but it was a toxic relationship so I'm glad. 

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Don't know if I should post all the food I eat daily.

 

I don't know either! It could be helpful, to confirm if you are eating the right things in the right combinations, or it could be quite triggering and feel obsessive. It depends on your context. Whole30 with an eating disorder is tricky tricky territory and I hope you have a doctor or psychologist working with you on these issues. Although forum members and moderators will do our very best, we are not professionals in this area. Please take care. Melissa says it better than I ever could, so I'm linking a couple articles for your review. However you proceed, I wish you the very best and applaud your efforts to eat healthy.

 

Here are the links: 

http://whole30.com/2014/06/dear-melissa-eating-disorders/

http://whole30.com/2012/02/whole30-gone-bad/

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So far today: coffee w 1T coconut oil, 2 eggs, 3 pieces bacon. Pre workout: 1/2 scoop whey protein (damn, not Whole 30) and 1/2 pack pre workout energy. Hard upper body weight training. Post workout / lunch: tuna salad w eggs, avocado, mango salsa, orange, sweet potato. Eating a bigger lunch than I'm used to so I won't snack later. Going for 4-5 hours in between meals. Planning pre and post meals better for the future. Looking into easily digestible protein sources other than whey protein powder. Any suggestions?

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Ok, you already caught that the protein powder is not compliant.  ;)  Many people have chicken, tuna or other lean protein pre WO.

Was your post workout meal more than 1/2 hour after your workout?  If so, it's fine.  (Anything closer than 30 minutes you'd want to avoid the fats and fruit.)

For your meal 1, add 1-3 cups of vegetables.  That's ideally what you want to aim for at every meal, along with your 1-2 palms of protein and appropriate amount of compliant fat.

 

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I feel so much better today as I don't feel frantically hungry as I do after eating processed carbs. I feel satisfied! I had an Epic bar snack at 4:00 and that was surprisingly enough. Took dogs for a 3 mile walk and had broccoli salad, steak, few pieces of coconut and apple for dinner. I feel like snacking. It's almost 8:00. I go to bed at 10. Going to shower and read and maybe hot tea before bed. I'm thinking about almond butter, but I'm actually pretty full. Great successful day.

Wondering about pre-workout snack as I workout at 6am. Thinking about taking BCAA's and coconut oil in my coffee. I don't feel like eating that early. Anyway, post workout / breakfast will be eggs, bacon and sweet potato and maybe an orange. Gonna try to wait 4-5 hours in between meals.

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Back on day 1 since I had protein powder yesterday but I didn't binge yay! This morning I just walked my dogs 2 miles then coffee w coconut oil, 3 eggs, 3 bacon, few blueberries and banana. Snack: coconut. Lunch: chicken, broccoli, cauliflower, mango salsa, avocado dressing (not much) and more coconut. I will add veggies to my breakfast tomorrow and make some post workout mini quiches with egg whites and sweet potato. Not exactly excited to eat chicken breast before working out in the morning, but good with coconut oil for my fat. I'm assuming Branch-Chain Amino Acids aren't recommended for pre workout protein :/ Guess I will eat a little chicken. I'm loving listening to the book as I walk, too! More later...

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Haven't posted in a while. 2 days ago was successful and yesterday was great except I ate too much almond butter late at night then had a chocolate casein shake right before bed. So I guess today is day 1 again :/ I will commit to eating Whole 30 today and no eating after 8:00 tonight. No throwing up though and no frantic hunger with blood sugar spikes. I feel so much more calm and peaceful with my food. Finished listening to It Starts with Food. It was great! Will post my daily food today. So far coffee with coconut oil and ghee. Time for breakfast.

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I absolutely relate to your struggle.  I'm on Day 7 with great success.  I have a history of bulimia.  Through counseling, family support and personal conviction I have been free from purging for a long time.....many years.....but food addiction doesn't go away and binge eating is my next dragon to slay.  I have committed to Whole30 because of the clear guidelines particularly these few:  1)  no weighing for 30 days (focusing on celebrating non-scale victories); 2)  no snacking (waiting for hunger is a big deal); 3) no paleo desserts, etc. (it's time to create a new relationship with food and break the dependency on sealing the meal with a sweet).

 

I don't log every day but I do have a thread on here if you ant to check it out.  it's titled something like "January 25th start date first time whole 30"----I don't remember for sure.  I'm trying not to get pre-occupied with food-thoughts so this is why I choose not to log every day.  I log my food on days when I'm tempted to go off-plan.  I look forward to sharing and supporting you in your journey.  Your candor and honesty has already supported me in mine!

 

you'll be another success story...I'm sure of it!....don't worry about the restarts....who cares if there are a million "day 1's"....it's a process and in the big picture you are trending up....towards balance and health.

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So proud of you for not spiraling out of control when you slip off the Whole30 plan and just starting over immediately. I really struggled on Day 10 but managed to claw my way over that hurdle. Today, I found myself with an afternoon home alone. Usually, I would be looking forward to doing a grocery haul followed by a private binge and maybe purge session but I've stayed on plan, took a nap instead of filling my free time with eating, and am hopeful that I'll be able to make it through today's temptations, too.

 

Coming into this forum when I'm struggling or tempted has been useful for me.

 

Keep up the great work!

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  • Whole30 Certified Coach

Hi!  I've posted on here during my W60 and multiple attempts at another W30 quite a bit.  I'm also a binge eater.  Have you read Rational Recovery and Brain Over Binge?  I found them both to be extremely helpful and the only method to deal with binge eating that actually works for me (RR is actually written for alcohol and drug addiction and BOB is the author's story about using RR to end her BED).  

 

Anyway, I just wanted to say welcome and wish you luck.  

 

And I will just add one more thing - I literally used to eat dessert/chocolate every.single.night.  It was like a ritual thing.  It was bad.  I thought it "helped" me to not binge b/c I got to eat chocolate every day (that wasn't really true, I still binged).  During W30 I got away from that but soon was just eating fruit with coconut milk every night - thus the ritual was still there.  In my most recent attempt at a W30 (logged on here, I made it to D21, then binged).  I successfully stopped eating after dinner.  And I can't believe I'm going to say this - the urge to eat after dinner is gone.  Now, its not all sunshine and rainbows - I still binge eat but that habit (urge, can't-focus-on-anything-else-desire, etc) to keep eating after dinner is gone for now - so improvement is possible :)

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