Today is Day 30!

[stephaniemd88]

My little girl was 13 months old and according to the scale, I was back to my "pre-baby" weight, but I knew my body wasn't the same. And to be honest, I wasn't really happy with my body before I got pregnant anyway. My clothes never seemed to fit quite right, and I knew I wasn't taking care of myself the way I should which, for me, resulted in a lot of insecurity and shame. Ironically, I also thought of myself as a "healthy eater," which was true if you only took into account my opinions about which foods were healthy and which weren't (I'd read ISWF and done a Whole30 a few years back). But if you actually looked at was going in my mouth, it was bad. Every birthday, work meeting, or night out was an 'exception' in my mind, and every time I turned around we were celebrating some sort of special occasion. On top of that, bad food was my secret reward/punishment. Whenever I was overly stressed or tired or lonely or whatever, I just had to have something 'for me,' something taboo, usually fast food or ice cream (bleh!). And all of this, of course, resulted in more insecurity and shame.

I have started probably 20+ Whole30's over the last few years, and completed 2 of them. Trying to nail down the difference between my successes and failures, I realized that if it was only about losing weight so I could be "good enough" and get rid of my insecurity and shame... I lasted only a day or two. This last time, it ended up being more about my sleep and energy quality (our daughter still wakes several times per night and we end up cosleeping a lot, and the lack of restful sleep was affecting my work, marriage, etc), which gave me a healthier motivation to stick with the plan. After weeks of trying to change my daughter so that I could sleep more, I switched it up and decided to change myself so that I could get the most fulfilling rest out of the sleep I was able to get each night.

Feb 2nd, 2015 was the first day of my Whole30, and everything just seemed different this time around! I found some kind of inner fortitude, or mental switch, that made it so much easier to actually stick with the food choices I made in advance. The first couple of weeks I struggled with exhaustion and headaches, but about day 8 or 9 I felt the wake-up magic kick in. My alarm went off at 6am as usual, but my husband and baby we're still sleeping so my immediate thought was, "Quick! Go back to sleep while you still can!" But then I realized I actually felt rested and awake and I didn't want to go back to sleep. It was amazing! And it was all the boost I needed to keep going with the program.

During weeks 3 and 4, I started to feel the benefits of consistent all-day energy, as well as see the benefits in my skin and body shape. I felt slimmer in my clothes, lighter in my step, more "myself" than I'd felt in years! I also realized that I was starting to enjoy food firstly for the fuel it provided my body, and only secondly for the taste and enjoyment of it. Because it was no longer a reward, punishment, or stress trigger, I was able to really enjoy everything I ate... No more insecurity or shame to speak of! That is a big non-scale weight off my shoulders.

Today is day 30 of my program, and while I am dreaming of a good draft beer and slice of quality woodfired pizza... I know that eating that way is no longer going to be a lifestyle for me. 90% of the time, I plan to eat Whole30-approved foods, which I can enjoy knowing I'm taking optimal care of my body. Then, when I indulge in a treat, I can fully enjoy it because it really will be an exception to the rule.

My relationship with food, my attitude towards my body, my energy levels, and my sleep quality have all changed for the better in just 30 days! I can't wait to see how they improve over a lifetime of good habits.

[GlennR]

Good story!