Having Trouble Starting Whole30 :(

[strawberryfields]

So I have signed up for the newsletter and payed my subscription fee but I am still having such trouble doing this. I think I can handle it but then I make the mistake of reaching for a brownie by mistake. I know mistake or not I have to start all over again but it's so hard. I did not think this was going to be so difficult. When Melissa was talking about how the food that we eat have such a strong emotional connection to us I did not think it was going to be THAT strong. Going through a day without added sugars or anything that was not accepted in Whole30 just seems IMPOSSIBLE right now. What do I do? What worked for you? I am getting so depressed over this. I thought I was stronger than these cravings. I feel terrible about myself right now and just want to give up.

[angledge]

Perhaps you could step into your Whole30 little by little? Maybe eliminate dairy one week, & make a completely Whole30-compliant dinner one night. Then eliminate grains or legumes the next week, & make two completely Whole30-compliant dinners that week. Step into it, bit by bit, & that way perhaps the program won't feel so overwhelming.

[ShannonM816]

You can do this.

 

First, let's talk about this:   you talk about "reaching for a brownie by mistake." It's a mistake if you don't realize that the brownie is off-plan and accidentally consume it. Occasionally this happens to people who don't realize edamame is just soybeans or that hummus is made from chickpeas, and therefore isn't allowed, or something like that (these things still require a restart, but they're honest mistakes). There's no circumstance in which you can mistakenly think a brownie is Whole30. You chose to eat the brownie. I know this sounds harsh, but I really feel like it's important that you realize this and make that distinction in your mind. You can choose to eat anything you want to eat. Now, if you choose to eat a brownie, you have to start your Whole30 over -- but you're always free to choose to eat a brownie if eating a brownie is more important to you than finishing a Whole30.

 

Now, think about why you ate that brownie. Were you hungry? Were you angry or sad or bored or lonely? Figure out why, and then figure out what you'll do next time that situation comes up. Have a plan in place to deal with it.

 

I know that if I'm hungry, I'm more likely to reach for whatever is easiest, so to prevent that, I make sure I eat plenty of food at my meals. I try to have food already prepped so that it won't take long to cook, so if I get home from work and I'm just absolutely ravenous, I have something that I can throw together quickly. Having food that's ready to go is my plan for how to deal with when I'm hungry, and when I don't take the time to do that, I know that I will grab something easy that may not be my best choice. So have pre-cooked, frozen protein in the freezer that can be thawed and heated up quickly. Or keep hardboiled eggs in the fridge. Even something like a few olives to have while you cook something might be enough.

 

I know that if I'm upset, I will want to turn to food for comfort. I personally don't keep things like brownies in the house because I know that if they're there, I can't resist them, especially if I'm having a bad day. If that's not an option for you because there are other people in your house who insist on having brownies around, try keeping your food separate from their food, and designate the food in your areas as the only foods you can eat, ever. Don't open cabinets where they keep their food. Don't look at the shelves in the fridge where they keep their food. Only get food from your spaces.

 

I know if I'm bored, I'll wander into the kitchen and look at the food in the fridge, and in the pantry, and more than likely eat something. So if I realize I'm bored, I try to find something else to do. For me, it's usually craft projects or reading, but it could be anything, really -- go for a walk, organize your junk drawer, journal, read, play with your pets or your kids, talk to someone, go outside, take a bath -- whatever will get your mind off food.

 

I've given you examples based on me, but think about what works for you, which might be totally different. If you figure out why you ate the brownie, but can't figure out a plan for dealing with that in the future, ask -- someone here will almost certainly have been through the same thing and may have suggestions to offer.

 

Finally, I want to say that no one is perfect. Plenty of people have had to start over because they ate something off-plan, whether it was intentional or not. I've completed a couple of Whole30s, try to eat mostly Whole30ish when I'm not on a Whole30 (sometimes that works well, sometimes not so much), but recently I started another Whole30, and about 10 days in, got stressed and gave in to my junk food cravings. I took several days to deal with that as much as I could, and then started over. Am I happy with myself that I got off track? No, obviously not. But I am happy that I got back on track and didn't just give up, and ultimately, to me, that's the most important part. Even once you complete the Whole30, you're not going to magically have changed a lifetime's worth of eating habits in 30 days. You'll have started to change them, but no matter how well your Whole30 ultimately goes, it's not a cure-all. There will still be stress in life, and you have to learn to deal with it. What I've found is sometimes I deal with it in a healthy way, and sometimes I revert back to bad habits. Success, for me, is that I sometimes deal with it in a healthy way. As long as I keep working on that and increase the percentage of times when I choose the healthy way rather than the unhealthy way, that is success. As much as I would like someone to wave a magic wand and make all my bad habits and cravings and everything go away forever, that's not how it works. I have to choose to change these things.  You have to choose to change things too -- and you can.

 

[MBC]

Get all access of the bad foods away from you. Always keep food in the fridge and have rooibos tea.

Good luck. Just take it one day at a time. It is so worth it. I don't need to take Korean ginseng anymore for stress and I don't need to take sleep tablets. I have hit my goal weight and feel great. I am in control and if I go backward I use my strong will again.

[strawberryfields]

Thank you so much everyone for your helpful tips. I keep messing up still but I realize that this addiction is much greater than I am and I am talking about it in my therapy sessions now. I just wish it was easy but it's not. I have been eating like this since childhood and it's comforting to me. I am an emotional eater This is one of the hardest challenges I have ever faced. If I can make it past this I feel like I can make it past anything!! 

[lexes42]

You're not 'messing up'.  You may not yet have prepared enough for success, but I assure you it's rare for people do just decide to do this and sail through even the first week without a seroius 'WHY AM I DOING THIS? I HATE THIS!' moment.  The body wants to feed it's addiction.

 

Food addiction is not 'greater than you'. You are way better than a brownie, and worthy of feeling good... not guilty over snack cake.  The whole 30 is a hard challenge, but it's not impossible.  The strict rules and 'cold turkey' approach tend to actually 'shorten' the pain period of withdrawal.  But it's not at all 'comfortable'.  You do have to accept that it's going make you pout and tantrum  - even scream and cry (I can't tell you how many times I have shocked myself with toddler behaviour over something 'I don't wanna' do... like eat vegetables at breakfast).

 

There is a reason addicts take it 'one day at a time'... and why they have to remove themselves from situations that reinforce the bad habit (in our case pantries and restaurants with non complian food)..

 

Remind yourself that 30 days from now you may have that brownie if that's your choice.  Brownies are not being taken from you forever. I found that helpful to remind myself that it was just for 'today' and find a way to distract my crazed brain.  There will always be another opportunity for easter chocolate  and birthday cake.... if I so desire (but I don't anymore).

 

You are right that when you start building up momentum with the whole 30 you start to feel incredibly proud of yourself!.... I cooked 7 days in a row!  I turned down that offer of food!  I can do ANYTHING!  I call it the 'sleep of the self righteous' when I get through another whole 30 day without giving in to what's easier.. even though everyone around me is eating whatever they like.

 

I have completed 1 whole 30, two Whole 28s (falling off the wagon in sight of the finish line!) and started more than I can count.  There's no  shame in going back to Day 1 - and no Whole 30 meal or sugar free day is ever wasted. You CAN do this.

[Lyrica]

I just want to say that I have had a very hard time starting a Whole30 as well. I got about 10 days in January and gave up... but I also have been easing in little by little since then. If it's a big change from how you are eating, maybe try eating mostly Paleo for a while, like a previous poster said, try cutting out dairy and gluten first, and take it from there. Some of us just don't do well with abrupt changes, esp. if you have major emotional issues around food. Also have you read the actual book, It starts with Food? No matter how much of the website you've read, the book is still worth reading. I actually bought the audio version and listened to it on my commute. It was very informative and inspiring. Anyway just keep working towards being healthier and being your best you... if you keep working toward it and being kind to yourself you will see the movement eventually!

[baltomom86]

You definitely can do this. Some thoughts... You might try eating more comforting fats, like tahini, nut butter, ghee, etc., during your meals. I find that really delicious. Also things like sweet potatoes and butternut squash mixed with some salt cinnamon and coconut milk. I am not talking about SWYPO, I just mean having complaint foods that make you feel mmm mmm good.

Emotional eating is so so hard. There were definitely times I had a bunch of dried fruit and nuts.... wasn't proud but at least it's better than a brownie! Now I have gotten much better about making sure I eat enough at my meals and drinking herb tea at nigbt. Best of luck! Keep the faith!

[ladyshanny]

You definitely can do this. Some thoughts... You might try eating more comforting fats, like tahini, nut butter, ghee, etc., during your meals. 

I agree with Baltomom's premise here of eating things that are comforting and maybe creamy or salty or whatever it is that your brain is used to (except sweet, NEVER sweet!).  I would tend to be careful of using too much nut butter or tahini though.  Nuts and their butters can be food without brakes for some people, they can enrage and keep alive the sugar dragon and they are hard on the stomach digestively.  Both nuts and tahini (sesame seed paste) are really unbalanced in their Omegas and should be used sparingly.

 

Try homemade mayo or guac with extra salt or sunshine sauce (yes, I realize it has nut butter but it's other things too) or some of the savoury, umami sauces from Nom Nom Paleo.

 

Eating horribly dull or bland food while going through your first few days and even through the extinction bursts near the middle-end can be a deal breaker.  Make sure it's all delicious!