nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 The last week has been really tough and I'm at the end of my rope. I feel fat, sick, tired, bloated, and depressed. It's not that I haven't noticed this before. Believe me, at 301 lbs, I never feel good. This is my highest weight and my whole "as long as it doesn't stop me from doing things, being fat doesn't bother me" argument no longer holds water because now it is stopping me from doing things. Things like tying my shoes without getting out of breath and red in the face, getting on an airplane without being mortified by asking for a seat belt extender, and sitting or standing or sleeping without pain. I desperately need a relaxing vacation but won't plan one because I don't want to go any where that I might need to dress up or wear less clothing (I haven't worn a bathing suit since I was 5 years old). I have a successful career but I know my glass ceiling is my weight. I cannot find professional clothes that fit right or look good. My Whole30 starts right now, with tonight's dinner - baked chicken and broccoli. Tomorrow can officially be Day 1, but I decided I am worth fighting for and I'm not going to wait to stand up for (and to) myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebe_J Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 I know it took a lot of courage just to post that. You have the right attitude. Go You!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 I know it took a lot of courage just to post that. You have the right attitude. Go You!!!! Thank you!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeadowLily Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 Thank you!! Nancy - the number one reason any particular diet fails is that it is implemented so brutally strict right out of the gate...and every part of the person's being rebels fairly quickly. The Shock and Awe approach is brutal. A Whole 30 will help you edge your way down slowly and without over-restriction, you'll have the best opportunity of getting there and staying there. You'll be able to do this without the pain of withdrawal, really. You will also find a Whole 30 will give you better retention of new healthy foods that will work alongside new habits....and there will be less mental/emotional struggle than on a brutally strict diet. A Whole 30 is reasonable restriction. If at the end of 6 months, you were able to maintain this new lifestyle going forward until you reach your own maintenance goal - would you consider it a successful strategy? It's a gentle change and it can be the change for the permanent WIN. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 Thank you, MeadowLily. I read everything on the site multiple times. It seems do-able to me. I'm approaching it with the attitude that I can do ANYTHING for a lousy 30 days. I'm sure the 30 after that will be easier. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evaq Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 The last week has been really tough and I'm at the end of my rope. In my mind I recast that as: I've just been given a rope (to help pull me out). You're not alone in your journey nancyr. There's a whole30 team on your side, pulling and tugging on that rope with you. Great job not waiting for tomorrow and seizing the day (well, night). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeadowLily Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 Thank you, MeadowLily. I read everything on the site multiple times. It seems do-able to me. I'm approaching it with the attitude that I can do ANYTHING for a lousy 30 days. I'm sure the 30 after that will be easier. Yes, Nancy. I can tell you that on Day 300, for me, it's getting easier meal by meal, mile by mile and day by day. You're worth every minute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 Yes, Nancy. I can tell you that on Day 300, for me, it's getting easier meal by meal, mile by mile and day by day. You're worth every minute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MTNan Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 You are worth it. You can do this. We are all behind you, cheering you on! You go girl!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 Thanks for all the support! Woke up in pain - knees, hip, shoulder - which just fueled my determination. Meal 1 will be simple - 2 eggs scrambled in coconut oil and a baked sweet potato. That's more than I normally eat for breakfast - usually just coffee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Krista Billows Rodriguez Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 Good luck Nancy, keep posting here you will get good feedback and support. You can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 Thank you, Krista! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 30, 2015 Author Share Posted March 30, 2015 Going for a walk tonight. My sister is a runner. She offered to pick me up on her way to the track. I can walk it while she runs. My legs are screaming "NO" but I'm ignoring them. Firing up a couch-to-5K type app I got last year and never used - Zombies 5K. I won't get home until 8 pm and I usually just want to go to bed. But, 30 minutes of walking ain't gonna kill me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SherryM Posted March 30, 2015 Share Posted March 30, 2015 You can do this nancyr! Just take it one day at a time, one meal at a time, one step at a time. This group has been super helpful to me. Keep us posted! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Thanks, SherryM! Meal 2 today was a big salad - romaine, grilled chicken, tomato, cukes, carrot, artichoke hearts, olives, green pepper, broccoli, and olive oil/vinegar. My sister picked me up and not counting the walk to/from the park, I did 1.79 mile walk - average pace was 19:41/mile which was WAY faster than I thought I would be. I even took the stairs when I got back to my apt (2 flights). My boyfriend made grilled steaks and sweet potatoes for dinner. Day 1 was awesome. I feel great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kmlynne Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Sounds like you are off to a great start! Your journey sounds so similar to mine. I am excited to see your successes! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Thank you, Karen. It is amazing to start something feeling positive and that it is possible. I guess I finally hit that point where I really wanted to turn around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Today has been a bit rough. I'm struggling with breakfast - I don't eat in the morning because I wake up nauseous so choking down breakfast within the first hour is quite the chore. I had egg salad today with some baby carrots. Definitely need to explore options that are less odorous. I think a few weeks without dairy will probably fix this issue though because the nausea is due to post-nasal drip. Black coffee seriously sucks so I might be giving up coffee completely. I didn't bring lunch today because work was providing. I didn't think it would be that difficult because, hey - salad! But, they ended up ordering from Chipotle. Of course, nothing is compliant. I had to order delivery of a salad which took an hour and meant I was starving by the time it arrived. Lesson learned - there will be stuff I can eat in my desk and in the work fridge starting tomorrow. Dinner tonight will be grilled chicken breast with asparagus and a side salad. I'm getting better with water. I went from 0 oz on Sunday to 48 ounces yesterday. Today I have had 48 oz and will definitely have during my walk and with dinner. Water is challenging too I'm always dehydrated. My sister is meeting me for another walk tonight. Looking forward to the weekend so I can cook for the week instead of taking it on day-to-day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kmlynne Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Nancy Boy, can staying compliant be hard when life throws curve-balls (such as work providing lunch). But with planning and having compliant foods at hand, it can be ok. Store things like canned chicken or tuna/salmon (protein), nuts (fats) and raw or canned veggies. If you have a freezer at work (and microwave), you can also keep a few bags of frozen veg - I promise no one will "borrow" those I even keep a bottle of compliant salad dressing and dill pickles at church for emergencies. Some ideas for breakfast: I used to have the same problem of not wanting to eat as soon as I got up. (It does get better!) Think outside the box and get used to "Meal One" instead of "breakfast" - it will open your mind to other options. Something I found easy to eat was soup - especially pureed veg. soup. Carrot or cauliflower soups are really easy to make: they are essentially the veg, a little broth (or water) to thin them out, with spices and seasonings. Steam or roast your veg, throw in the blender with a little liquid and some seasonings and mix. I would make large containers of it and keep in the fridge - pulling out and reheating a serving at a time. Throw some chucks of avocado in the soup for your fat. Add some baked/roasted/poached chicken (make a whole bunch when you cook and keep in fridge) since it is a very mild protein. Eventually I worked up to things like sweet potato hash with eggs and now I just pull anything out of the fridge and eat. Watch your template. Your dinner looks good but it may be missing enough fat. The fat in your meals will keep you feeling full until your next meal. I assume there will be some in your salad dressing, and you may even be cooking with it. Make sure you are getting enough! Look at your successes already!!!! That is great on the water - keep it up! Enjoy your walk tonight!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 Thank you! Great ideas. I will try making some soup this weekend. I can probably tolerate liquids better than solids in the morning. Great idea on keeping frozen veg at work. For sure, they won't get touched. Will pick up tuna, etc. tonight. Today, I made sure I brought in a piece of fruit (apple) and a little sunbutter for a snack. I had leftovers for meal 2. Same meal one as yesterday. Yes, I only use olive oil and vinegar as dressing. The chicken was cooked on the George Forman Grill so no oil. I've been trying to make sure I follow the template, which is why I had egg salad for breakfast - the mayo was my fat (homemade). Vegetables are the hardest part for me to get in. I like them all but I get tired of them pretty quick. I didn't get to walk because I forgot I had an event to attend. I didn't get home until 10 pm. Today was a really bad day - not for food, I did very well on food and intend to keep it that way. But, I had a rough day at work and the cravings are killing me. I am not going to give in but man it has been a struggle. I want to comfort myself with food in a bad way - totally would turn into a binge. I am going to walk it off tonight. Already called my sister to confirm. The app I'm using follows a "story" and tonight's story is 37 minutes long. So, including getting to and from the park, that's about an hour of walking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
35angels Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Good luck sounds like an interesting app- what's it called? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted April 3, 2015 Author Share Posted April 3, 2015 @35Angels the app is called Zombies Run It's been rough the last few days. I'm on an emotional roller coaster that is mostly in the down direction. I have some bad headaches and sciatica pain. But I'm sticking to my guns in terms of following the plan. But I stopped moving. Just sitting in a big lump all day which has contributed greatly to my pain. Going to try to get up and out today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted April 4, 2015 Author Share Posted April 4, 2015 Went out for a while today. Picked up fruit and vegetables. Spending tomorrow morning cooking for the week. Looking forward to the cauliflower soup suggested by Kmlynne. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emma Posted April 4, 2015 Share Posted April 4, 2015 Love your posts and cheering you on in your journey! Kudos to you for sticking to your guns. It's not easy, but it's so worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nancyr Posted April 7, 2015 Author Share Posted April 7, 2015 Thanks, Emma! The last few days have been rough. I feel horrible. Everything aches. My back hurts so much that I can barely sleep - tossing and turning all night. I woke up to a surprise today - my period. That has to be a direct result of the way I am eating because I have PCOS and I'm 45. That thing doesn't show up that often. Explains the back pain and the crankiness. LOL I keep going. Luckily, I have alot of support. My boyfriend is doing this with me so food is pretty easy. My sister and my 15 yo nephew keep dragging me to the park to walk while they run. This morning I plan to eat left over pad thai - http://theclothesmakethegirl.com/2011/05/08/paleo-pad-thai/ Meal 2 will be cauliflower soup plus some protein (whatever I pull out of the freezer in a few). I haven't decided what to make for tonight's meal but I'm home today so will make something that requires a little more work. Hope everyone is having a good week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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