maggief Posted September 15, 2012 Author Share Posted September 15, 2012 DAY 14: Busy day! After work, I went house-hunting with my little sister, grabbed lunch, went to the movies, and picked up our race packets for tomorrow (!) -- then I came home and got some much needed cooking done! Curry, bacon-beef burgers, turmeric-spiced sliders are all in the fridge with plenty of fresh veggies. This week's quiche (with grassfed ground beef, roasted eggplant, tomatoes, onions and yellow squash) is cooling on the counter. And the lamb osso buco is in the slow cooker. Tiredness feels so good when it comes at the end of a productive day. Sleep: 7.5 hours What I ate: Meal 1: canned tuna with homemade mayo, raw celery and baby carrots, raspberries Meal 2: 1/2 roast chicken, green salad, olives Snack at the movies: freeze-dried apples (only ingredients were organic apples and cinnamon) Snack while cooking: a few cherry tomatoes Exercise: Rest day, but I ended up being on my feet (walking, cooking) most of the day. I'm exhausted and not hungry, so dinner isn't in the cards tonight. I'm going to drink my magnesium, chase it with a cup of licorice tea, and head to bed. Can't wait to wake up rested and hungry and ready to run Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 15, 2012 Share Posted September 15, 2012 Have a great race! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 16, 2012 Author Share Posted September 16, 2012 DAY 15: Race is complete! I finished the 8K in about 54 mins. It was a flat course along D.C.'s Tidal Basin, perfect weather, but surprisingly tough. My legs just felt very heavy the whole way for some reason. Still, I finished, didn't feel wrecked at the end, and it was a lovely way to spend the morning. Couldn't have asked for a better way to kick of "race season" -- I have a 5K next weekend and a 10-miler next month. Uff. Sleep: 8.5 hours What I ate: Meal 1: crustless quiche (eaten about 1.5 hours pre-race) Post-race: plum organics apple/carrot pack Meal 2: lamb osso buco, sweet potato, peach, coconut water (eaten about 1.5 hours post-race) Meal 3: 8 oz filet mignon, grilled asparagus, mixed berries, couple tablespoons coconut water Exercise: 8K run (54 mins), plus about 6 miles of walking to/from the race site and wandering over the course of the day. Tomorrow I'm treating myself to a sports massage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 16, 2012 Author Share Posted September 16, 2012 Ugh insomnia is so frustrating. I thought I'd moved past this, but clearly still having problems. I've been in bed for 4+ hours waiting for sleep. I've gone thru periods tonight of trembling with exhaustion, briefly crying, but for the most part just laying here. I've been awake so long I actually got hungry again! I'm too exhausted to deal with heating up a proper meal, i just had a banana and I'm hoping the bit of carbs helps me relax. It's really awful to want nothing more than to fall asleep, to do everything "right" (eat clean, exercise, spend time outside, take the magnesium supplement, get to bed at an early time in a pitch dark room) and still get stuck wondering what's wrong with me bc my body can't fulfill a basic human function and just fall asleep. Sigh. Off to try again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat B. Posted September 16, 2012 Share Posted September 16, 2012 I so feel your pain. My problem isn't so much falling asleep but staying asleep. I struggle to sleep through the night almost every night. It's so frustrating being so exhausted during the day and not being able to recharge at night - what gives?! I'm trying to be patient and let the process work over the 30 days, but yesterday I found myself tearing up because I was so exhausted. You're not alone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 16, 2012 Share Posted September 16, 2012 Oh dear, you poor thing Maggie. I always have to read until I'm dropping off, I can't just go to bed and wait for leep to come, I have to distract my brain... Is your bedroom pitch black - this has really improved my sleep, now I can't sleep if there is a crack of light coming in! (sorry, just read back & see you are in dark) I also found at stressful times in my life listening to a guided mediatation helped too... "meditations for morning & evening" by Bernie Siegel is great, it's on itunes I think. Hope you get some good rest soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 16, 2012 Author Share Posted September 16, 2012 I so feel your pain. My problem isn't so much falling asleep but staying asleep. I struggle to sleep through the night almost every night. It's so frustrating being so exhausted during the day and not being able to recharge at night - what gives?! I'm trying to be patient and let the process work over the 30 days, but yesterday I found myself tearing up because I was so exhausted. You're not alone! Thanks Kat! I'm sorry you're having sleeping issues too -- just going through the forum it seems so much more common than I realized before. I'm hoping things turn around for both of us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 16, 2012 Author Share Posted September 16, 2012 Oh dear, you poor thing Maggie. I always have to read until I'm dropping off, I can't just go to bed and wait for leep to come, I have to distract my brain... Is your bedroom pitch black - this has really improved my sleep, now I can't sleep if there is a crack of light coming in! (sorry, just read back & see you are in dark) I also found at stressful times in my life listening to a guided mediatation helped too... "meditations for morning & evening" by Bernie Siegel is great, it's on itunes I think. Hope you get some good rest soon. Ooo thank you for the suggestion! I'm going to see if I can download the meditation for tonight and give it a try. Some nights I doze off easily, and other nights it feels like I'm waiting for a bus that just won't come. I thought my apt was pitch dark, but I realized this morning that my coffee maker has a soft glow in my kitchen. (I live in a studio apt, so any light in the living room and kitchen areas is probably impacting my sleep.) I'm going to make sure I unplug that as well. Last night I got bored of not sleeping so I pulled out a new book -- "Comfort Me With Offal." It is absolutely hysterical and cheered me up enough to be able to relax Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 16, 2012 Author Share Posted September 16, 2012 DAY 16: Sleep: About 5 or 6 hours What I ate: Meal 1: bacon-beef burgers, cooked onions, raw sauerkraut, peppermint tea Meal 2: kombucha, coconut chicken curry, raw celery and grape tomatoes with salsa, apple, coconut butter Meal 3: turmeric-spiced sliders, baby carrots, raw mushrooms with balsamic vinegar, apple, peppermint tea Exercise: Rest day that included a little bit of easy walking and a sports massage. Ahhh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 17, 2012 Author Share Posted September 17, 2012 Nice blog post to muster up motivation on a Monday morning: http://www.theclothe...y-motivation-2/ Also, I saw this great quote on someone else's log (I think Kaye is the originator?): “Don't get so focused on the 'results you're hoping for' that you overlook the good things that are happening RIGHT NOW. So yeah, you had a bad day - I'd be unhappy too†I really need to remember this advice when things get tough. So so true -- on the W30 and in other aspects of life. Mental note made! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 17, 2012 Author Share Posted September 17, 2012 DAY 17: I had kind of an ugh moment today at the gym. I was struggling through a set of "guy" pushups (off the knees, chest to the floor, elbows close to the body) when one of my friends walked by and pointed out that my butt was a little too high in the air. My eyes welled up with tears because I hadn't realized I was doing it wrong. Suddenly I was overwhelmed by the feeling that I've been doing a bunch of things wrong without realizing it, struggling through issues like my diet, work, my love life -- and of course the W30 -- without making any progress. The moment passed quickly; I made the adjustment she suggested and the pushups were still hard but fine, and luckily the tears went away without resulting in actual crying... The sudden, acute emotion over something so simple tells me I have some issues to work on. Ugh. Sleep: about 7.5 hours What I ate: Meal 1: quiche, kombucha Snack: banana, decaf coffee (I've been successfully not snacking during the W30, but I ended up going longer between meals today than I had planned. I don't plan on making this a habit.) Meal 2: bacon-beef burger, broccoli slaw with balsamic vinegar, celery and baby carrots with salsa, peppermint tea Meal 3 (PWO): coconut chicken curry, sweet potato, apple, coconut butter Exercise: Pullup practice, pushup practice, 500m run. Strength portion of workout was weighted reverse lunges and cuban press. Then, tabata of box jumps, situps and single-under jump rope. Good workout -- got a good sweat going but didn't feel wrecked or even particularly winded at the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 18, 2012 Share Posted September 18, 2012 I totally know what you mean, I used to be a member of http://www.eplifefit.com/ and you have to submit videos of your movements, I cried over my squat critique Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 18, 2012 Author Share Posted September 18, 2012 I totally know what you mean, I used to be a member of http://www.eplifefit.com/ and you have to submit videos of your movements, I cried over my squat critique Oh man, that sounds awesome and incredibly brutal! There are some days that aren't made for nitpicking (sp?) and even friendly advice hits a sore spot I guess -- on those days the only critique I want is one that keeps me from dying under the barbell lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 18, 2012 Author Share Posted September 18, 2012 DAY 18: My spirits were much higher today, though I felt like a total flake. I rearranged my schedule this afternoon for a doctor's appointment, but when I arrived I discovered that my appointment was yesterday, not today. The nurse was incredibly understanding and we rescheduled for next week, but I'm pretty shocked at my mistake. Not sure where my mind was lol. I kind of enjoyed having a bit of downtime this afternoon instead of trying to squeeze in extra work or errands. I even made it to the gym early for extra mobility and warmup time, my fave Sleep: about 8.5 hours (I wouldn't have objected to another hour haha) What I ate: Meal 1: quiche, 1/4 avocado (the rest had gone bad, unfortunately), banana, decaf coffee Meal 2: can of tuna (this was more of a snack because I totally forgot to pack any veggies or fat, more flakiness lol) Meal 3: I grabbed lunch at Chipotle before my failed dr. appt. After a lot of online research, I ordered a salad with carnitas, tomato salsa and guacamole, apparently the cleanest items on their menu Meal 4: grassfed sliders, mixed greens sauteed with bacon, plantain, coconut butter Exercise: Pullup practice, then 3x5 floor press @ 65#, 70#, 75#. Today's metcon felt really good. It was 10 rounds of 60 seconds work (15 push presses and as many burpees as possible in the remaining time), 60 seconds rest. The goal was to stay consistent with the amount of time it took to do the push presses in each round so we could aim to get the same number of burpees in the last round as the first. My rounds were very consistent, almost identical, and my coach singled me out at the end to compliment my pacing. Silly, but it totally made my day lol Onward to Day 19! I'm feeling inspired by other W30-ers to extend this past 30 days. I don't have any major events on the horizon that warrant "off-roading," so I figure why not? The ongoing challenge will be to avoid weighing/measuring myself. We'll see... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 20, 2012 Author Share Posted September 20, 2012 DAY 19: Sleep: about 5 hours (not good, no idea why I couldn't sleep again, but I thankfully felt ok today) What I ate: Meal 1: quiche, decaf coffee Meal 2: can of tuna, apple, kombucha Meal 3: last bit of coconut chicken curry, cherry tomatoes, baby carrots Meal 4 (PWO): braised chicken livers, mixed greens sauteed with bacon, banana, coconut butter Exercise: Strength today was 3 rounds of 7 strict presses (x020 tempo), 60 secs rest, 30-sec amrap of weight lunges, 60 secs rest, 60 plank hold, 60 secs rest. I used 45# in round 1, 50# in round 2, 55# in round 3. I should have started at a higher weight. After that, we did some rowing practice then did 2 rounds of 300m sprints, with 90 secs rest in between. My first 300m took 1:13, and my second took 1:11. Not super fast, but I focused on keeping good form and my pace was consistent so I'm happy. My acne, unfortunately, has taken a turn for the worse. I have terrible breakouts above my upper lip, it looks and feel just awful. My upper lip area is the only place where I breakout now, the rest of my face is clear. I've been trying to figure out if that is connected to a specific condition or hormone imbalance, but I haven't had much luck in my research. It could very well be related to my roller coaster sleep, which stinks because I can't seem to get a handle on that Oh well, trying to keep my chin up! Tomorrow I am scheduled to get a haircut and, if time permits, a manicure and pedicure. Great way to celebrate DAY 20! Woohoo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 20, 2012 Author Share Posted September 20, 2012 DAY 20! Woot woot -- finally feeling the "Tiger Blood" phase of the W30! I slept well, woke up feeling rested and generally happy, put on a fun outfit (leopard print trouser capris), and felt really ready to tackle a busy day. In addition to my usual work, I completed my application and online training for an amazing volunteer position teaching schoolkids about cooking and nutrition, had a productive meeting with one of my mentors about my "career," and even squeezed in a mid-morning walk to get some fresh air (and a bottle of kombucha, of course, lol). I feel so grown-up haha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 Rockin' day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 21, 2012 Author Share Posted September 21, 2012 DAY 20 cont'd: This afternoon I got a haircut (bangs! huge change) and had a lovely dinner out with my sister. We went to a really steakhouse where we got meat, veggies, and nothing else The waitress came over to us at the end of the meal and said very good-naturedly, "I already know you're going to say no dessert. Would you like any coffee?" With the check, she brought a special treat: two nickel-sized pieces of peanut butter fudge. I let my sister eat mine, I wasn't even tempted Sleep: 8 hours What I ate: Meal 1: quiche, decaf coffee, kombucha Meal 2: braised livers, mixed greens sauteed with bacon, apple Meal 3: banana, grilled scallops, steak (split with my sis), steamed broccoli, assortment of mushrooms with truffle oil Exercise: Rest day, though I did a bit of running around. Enough to make me completely exhausted lol. Goodnight! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 21, 2012 Author Share Posted September 21, 2012 DAY 21: It's Friday! I am so ready for the weekend to begin. I'm only working a half-day today because I'm traveling, and given my odd work hours I only have 2 hours left in my shift I had another great sleep last night. That's two nights in a row. Huge success. I'm trying not to get too excited since I know how fleeting this kind of rest can be, but I'm pretty stoked. I'm less thrilled about my skin. The acne above my upper lip has gotten much, much worse even overnight. (Mysteriously, the rest of my face has seen improvements...) This weekend I'm heading up to NJ to see my parents. I'll also be doing a 5K race with some friends, and tomorrow I'm going to a Balanced Bites workshop!! I've been looking forward to this for a good long while, though I'm suddenly feeling nervous about staying on track while traveling. My family and friends tend to want to eat out to "celebrate" whenever I go home, and even the workshop tomorrow is organizing a group lunch order from a nearby restaurant for anyone interested. I know it's totally *possible* to get clean food at restaurants, but I honestly don't want to go through that hassle and worry for Every. Single. Meal. between tonight and Monday morning. I think I can probably limit eating out to dinners tonight and tomorrow. And I will pack my own lunch and snacks for the workshop. When I get to my parents' tonight, I can whip up a batch of sliders, sweet potato and veggies. Success is all in the planning, right? The W30 Daily email today included a "Break That Habit" worksheet designed to help "discover hidden trends in your habit cues." I think my worst habit -- and the one I really want to work on -- is negative self-talk. I'm such a happy, upbeat person in my interactions with other people, but I've noticed that I can be very harsh and unforgiving with myself. So for the next week, I'm going to log instances of this, which range from actual meanness toward myself ("fat" and "ugly" are words that crop up far too often in my mind) to much more subtle things like a disappointed glance when I pass a mirror. The worksheet has room for 12 instances, and room to log the location, time, emotional state, other people, and preceding action. I read something great this morning that bad habits aren't broken, they're replaced by good habits. Once I pinpoint cues for the negative self-talk, I need to figure out how to replace it with something more positive. Maybe some kind of mantra that I can repeat... I'll have to think about this one lol. Anyway, happy Friday and happy Day 21! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derval Posted September 21, 2012 Share Posted September 21, 2012 Great post, enjoy your workshop, I'm a big BB fan! And great project to work on too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 22, 2012 Author Share Posted September 22, 2012 DAY 21 cont'd: Made it up to NJ this afternoon. My parents are so supportive, we had a fantastic home-cooked W30 meal tonight My dad made a roast chicken with white potatoes for him and my mom, a sweet potato for me, and an avocado salad. "Dessert" was cantaloupe. There are non-compliant temptations in the house, such as dried fruit, dark chocolate, cookies (Milanos, I think), but I can honestly say I don't want any of it. Sleep: 8 hours What I ate: Meal 1: quiche, decaf coffee Meal 2: ground beef "stir fry" with broccoli slaw, tomato paste and balsamic vinegar; cherry tomatoes; apple; kombucha Snack (post-bus ride): raw celery and baby carrots, couple tbsp of coconut butter Meal 3: roast chicken breast, sweet potato, avocado with lemon juice, cooked onions, cantaloupe Exercise: None. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 23, 2012 Author Share Posted September 23, 2012 DAY 22: Fantastic day. The BB workshop was totally inspiring and YAY, it's fall, my favorite time of year I'm totally exhausted to elaborate on how I'm feeling, but wanted to make sure I log my eats and zzz's before nodding off... Sleep: about 5 hours. Last night was pretty bad. I fell asleep around 9pm, then woke up 45 mins later when I heard a noise. I didn't fall back asleep until about 2am and had to wake up at 6:30am. I'm getting up early again tomorrow for the 5K, so I hope my rest is better tonight. What I ate: Meal 1: 3 eggs with dill, red pepper, banana Meal 2: broiled salmon, sweet potato, baby carrots Meal 3: beef-tomato-saffron "stir fry" over raw baby spinach, 1/2 avocado, some grapes and blackberries, a spoon of coconut butter Exercise: Nada. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 24, 2012 Author Share Posted September 24, 2012 DAY 23: Race day! Felt much stronger than at last week's run. I crossed the finish line just before my best friend; his garmin registered his time as 29:57 so I'll go with that, too My sleep is still pretty terrible, but on the bright side my skin seems to be healing [knock on wood]. Sleep: very on/off for about 8 hours (would sleep an hour, then be up for an hour, etc.) What I ate: Pre/post race: a spoon of coconut butter before, a banana after Meal 1: beef-tomato-saffron "stir fry", steamed spinach, raw red pepper, egg, avocado Meal 2: 2 hardboiled eggs, some grapes and strawberries Meal 3: broiled salmon, beef and eggplant stew, sweet potato Exercise: 5K race: 29:57-ish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maggief Posted September 25, 2012 Author Share Posted September 25, 2012 DAY 24: Sleep: 9 hours - amazing! What I ate: Meal 1: leftover beef and eggplant stew, raw red pepper, apple Snack: munched on raw celery and baby carrots with salsa and some guac while cooking Meal 2 (PWO): banana, broiled salmon, roasted brussels sprouts, coconut butter Exercise: 3 rounds of 6 sumo deadlifts (115#--135#--155#), dumbell presses for 45 secs (15# DBs), side planks (30 secs/side) "Fran" -- 21-15-9 thrusters and pullups -- 9:24 with 45# thrusters, 2 green bands (1.5-inch wide) "Break That Habit": I'm pretty glad that I went a few days without any negative self-talk, but broke my streak today when I was getting ready to go to CF. My workout clothes, which fit comfortably a couple of weeks ago, were noticeably tight. I felt uncomfortable, and couldn't stop looking at my reflection and feeling sad as I passed mirrors, reflective glass, etc. I feel heavy, uncomfortable, unfit, totally unattractive. Per the W30 worksheet... Location: my apt, on the street/metro, at the gym (That's normally a "safe place" for me emotionally, but today even mid-Fran, I was self-conscious. No one seems to notice that I'm "huge," or if they do they don't care. This is my problem.) Time: 4 p.m.-ish Emotional state: un-confident, self-conscious, disappointed Other people: No one else was involved. No harsh words were spoken by anyone but me. I was sad before I even left my apt. Preceding action: I changed into my exercise clothes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubarb Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 You had a great day of feeding your body with love. THAT is a fact (that, and I'm a sucker for anything with eggplant). You can easily replace that negative self talk with the truth - you have been holding to the commitment you made to yourself. That's pretty awesome. I am so jealous of your 9 hours of sleep! I'm off to bed now to see if I can get a few hours. DAY 24: Sleep: 9 hours - amazing! What I ate: Meal 1: leftover beef and eggplant stew, raw red pepper, apple Snack: munched on raw celery and baby carrots with salsa and some guac while cooking Meal 2 (PWO): banana, broiled salmon, roasted brussels sprouts, coconut butter Exercise: 3 rounds of 6 sumo deadlifts (115#--135#--155#), dumbell presses for 45 secs (15# DBs), side planks (30 secs/side) "Fran" -- 21-15-9 thrusters and pullups -- 9:24 with 45# thrusters, 2 green bands (1.5-inch wide) "Break That Habit": I'm pretty glad that I went a few days without any negative self-talk, but broke my streak today when I was getting ready to go to CF. My workout clothes, which fit comfortably a couple of weeks ago, were noticeably tight. I felt uncomfortable, and couldn't stop looking at my reflection and feeling sad as I passed mirrors, reflective glass, etc. I feel heavy, uncomfortable, unfit, totally unattractive. Per the W30 worksheet... Location: my apt, on the street/metro, at the gym (That's normally a "safe place" for me emotionally, but today even mid-Fran, I was self-conscious. No one seems to notice that I'm "huge," or if they do they don't care. This is my problem.) Time: 4 p.m.-ish Emotional state: un-confident, self-conscious, disappointed Other people: No one else was involved. No harsh words were spoken by anyone but me. I was sad before I even left my apt. Preceding action: I changed into my exercise clothes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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