Anxiety in Eating New Things

[Amerr]

Today is Day 4 of my first Whole30 experience. I'm incredibly excited to be on the journey, but I just had my first big freak out moment.

At the moment, my husband and I live with my parents - who are notorious for overindulging. They've spent the last few days creating a feast of treats (cakes, homemade breads, cream cheese dips, etc.) and begging us to "just try a bite." It's been difficult - but I've stayed determined and politely refused.

Last night, my dad grilled some plain ole burgers. He added a little salt and a little pepper and threw them on the grill. When my husband started prepping some for breakfast this morning (topped with sautéed kale and a fried egg - seriously YUM), I had a full blown meltdown.

I have never known my dad to sabotage my healthy choices or to sneak secret ingredients in his food or to lie about what he's made or to add anything non-paleo to his burgers. So I realize this is totally irrational.

But I struggled to eat - or enjoy - my meal (which I did end up eating). I'm struggling to feel okay with this.

I don't know if it's just anxiety over someone else preparing part of my meal that I'm not in control of, or what.

Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Is this normal??

[SugarcubeOD]

It sounds like maybe you should have a conversation with your parents about how important this 30 days is to you and how you're concerned about sneak/secret/accidental ingredients.

I also doubt your dad would be intentionally sneaking ingredients into what he's making but if it's giving you anxiety, I think the best thing to do would be to be honest about it.

 

Also, if you DO get dosed with something, despite your best efforts, maybe try adding days on to the end of your 30 instead of starting over... 

 

Can you try and do more of the cooking for the family so you're in control?  

[ladyshanny]

Hmmm....this might be a rather intense reaction, especially given your surroundings and being in a place where you trust the other people.  Are you prone to or have a history of anxiety? Whole30 definitely requires a high level of compliance in both the yes-no lists and really, the spirit of the program.  What it does not encourage or want is someone to create a panic within themselves around food.  That's the antithesis of what we're going for.

 

Have you sat down and really thought about why you felt overwhelmed and panicky about that meal? Are you assigning misplaced self worth statements to the food that you are eating during this Whole30?  

[Amerr]

Until this point, I've done all of the cooking. I've just been feeling isolated when I cook - because they expect me to share in the little things that they make, too.

I am prone to anxiety and have had some outside stress building over the last week or two. So I know that is part of it.

A lot of my family pastimes have revolved around unhealthy foods, so I'm sure it's hard for them to understand why this is important to me. In fact, I've received a lot of eye rolling and "This isn't going to last" statements.

[ladyshanny]

In fact, I've received a lot of eye rolling and "This isn't going to last" statements.

Perhaps you could go at it from the point that it's not really supposed to "last".  It's a 30 day elimination protocol designed to clean your slate so that you can reintroduce foods and see how they affect you.  If your family knows of your anxiety issues you might even mention that as part of why you're doing this: "Once I eliminate and then reintroduce traditional foods, I'll be able to see if it's sugar or gluten or even dairy that worsens my anxiety."

[Amerr]

I hadn't considered taking that approach to it. But I definitely think that would help to lessen the anxiety I have about things.

My parents aren't the type to talk about their feelings, but I think in this case, my success in the Whole30 means more than the temporary discomfort of opening up about it.

Thanks for the quick responses!

[MeadowLily]

Until this point, I've done all of the cooking. I've just been feeling isolated when I cook - because they expect me to share in the little things that they make, too.

I am prone to anxiety and have had some outside stress building over the last week or two. So I know that is part of it.

A lot of my family pastimes have revolved around unhealthy foods, so I'm sure it's hard for them to understand why this is important to me. In fact, I've received a lot of eye rolling and "This isn't going to last" statements.

I think living at home as a married couple is a big stressor.   There is a heightened stress coming at you from  all directions.   Hopefully, you'll have your own place soon.   Everything will smooth out then.   Do the best you can, Amerr. 

[chezjulie]

Hi Amerr, 

 

Anxiety can just build up until it overflows like water being added to a cup. Maybe the stressors of the week, plus feeling like you have to be constantly vigilant with your parents who are trying to lure you with their Stack O' Treats just got to you.

 

There is a forum on here called Family and Friends, and if you read through it you'll see that a lot of people have dealt with well-meaning "food pushers," who include parents or in-laws that they live with. That might give you some ideas and let you know that you're not alone with this issue.

 

I found that the Whole30 did affect my mood at times, and if you are susceptible to anxiety it's a good idea to have a sweet potato or other starchy vegetables like beets, white potatoes, parsnips, etc. with one or two meals a day. That really helps with mood.

 

Finally, maybe you can try having a talk with your parents and telling them that while you know most people don't eat this way, it's important to you to give it a shot and stick to it, and you could really use their support as cheerleaders. Sometimes if you give a person a job and reinforce that you're not judging them, they will come around.

 

Good luck!

[Amerr]

Thanks for all the advice!

I will absolutely try the addition of healthy starches to my diet.

Thanks everyone!

[ladyshanny]

Hi Amerr, 

 

Anxiety can just build up until it overflows like water being added to a cup. Maybe the stressors of the week, plus feeling like you have to be constantly vigilant with your parents who are trying to lure you with their Stack O' Treats just got to you.

 

There is a forum on here called Family and Friends, and if you read through it you'll see that a lot of people have dealt with well-meaning "food pushers," who include parents or in-laws that they live with. That might give you some ideas and let you know that you're not alone with this issue.

 

I found that the Whole30 did affect my mood at times, and if you are susceptible to anxiety it's a good idea to have a sweet potato or other starchy vegetables like beets, white potatoes, parsnips, etc. with one or two meals a day. That really helps with mood.

 

Finally, maybe you can try having a talk with your parents and telling them that while you know most people don't eat this way, it's important to you to give it a shot and stick to it, and you could really use their support as cheerleaders. Sometimes if you give a person a job and reinforce that you're not judging them, they will come around.

 

Good luck!

Nice comment, Julie!