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Whole30Sue

Help. Desperation. Accountability.

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I am struggling terribly! I did a whole60 in April and May. Started riding my own bike paleo style for all of June. Then I went completely off the deep end face first into my old way of eating!

Ugh! I went on a land and sea Alaska cruise vacation, got a mild cold, was sleeping terribly, care giving to disabled daughter and 74 year old mother-in-law, difficult in hotels and ship cabins, and just started eating anything. Went down hill fast. Coffee again! Oh my Lord it tasted so good. And now I find myself at the end of July, almost a whole month of bad eating. And when I say bad, I mean bad, I've been eating pop tarts for breakfast. (Cannot believe I am confessing this.)

I keep trying to get back on the bike and miss. My mother-in-law fell again and fractured her shoulder so she has been staying with us. Not an excuse, but it is stressful being care giver to two.

I'm not sure if I need to commit to another whole30 or whole7, or do I just try to get back to my bike version of paleo.

Reaching out on this forum is my first real step to getting back. I HATE the sugar dragon. It defeated me. Hate it!

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Hi, Sue! I'm sorry you're having a rough time. I don't have the same experiences you do as far as being a caregiver, but I definitely understand falling back into old habits and how hard it is to get back to healthy eating.

First, I want to say that your sugar dragon hasn't defeated you. You're here, asking for help, so you're still in that fight. It may feel like you're losing, but you can overcome this.

As far as what you should do, that depends on what you feel you can commit to right now. Is a full whole30 a realistic goal for you? If it is, great! If it's not right now, that's okay too. Maybe right now all you can do is focus on making better choices most of the time. That's fine. Choosing eggs and veggies over a pop tart today is a good choice. Tomorrow (or at your next meal), try to make that same good choice again. If some days you don't, that's okay, you'll get another chance to make a good choice at your next meal. Just aim for more healthy choices than unhealthy, and when you've done that for a while, you may find you're in a better place to commit to a whole30 if that's what you want to do, or to your own healthy plan, whatever that looks like.

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Thanks for encouragement! I did have a good breakfast this morning. Scrambled eggs, spinach and kalamata olives. It all tasted really good. Better than a pop tart. But my brain wants that dopamine kick and keeps arguing that I could eat a poptart now and start over healthy tomorrow. A never ending cycle that does not lead to success.

I did good with breakfast, so my next goal is to get through lunch. Baby steps. It's a business meeting with lunch provided. But they always have salad and some protein. Feels good to be planning ahead.

Maybe I can make it through one day.

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I've gotten off track recently too, courtesy of a vacation. I have a couple things I'm focusing on to try to get back to better food choices, maybe we can help each other out! One thing I do: you know that crappy feeling you get when you eat crappy food (pop tarts for you, beer/wine for me!)? I hang onto that feeling tight, and remind myself that I do not want to feel like that all the time. I really like being able to bound out of bed (ok, that might be pushing it a little, I don't really bound...) and attack my day with a great attitude and lots of energy. I find if I focus on the end result of my food choices rather than the choices themselves, that I do better.

Another thing I have done to start getting back on track, is I picked out a few of my very favorite foods from my whole30 (homemade mayo currently tops my list!), and decided to try to build my meals around those foods. It might sounds completely ridiculous to build a meal around a fat, but if it keeps me compliant and on template, I say that's a success.

I have also found that the more poor food choices I make, the worse my kids and husband eat as well. If my kids see me grabbing low-quality processed food from the cupboard, they usually see it as a green light to follow suit, so I'm trying to get back on track to set a good example for them too.

I'm not a caregive for anybody at home, but I work in health care; seeing the poor healing and quality of life that comes from years of poor health habits helps to give perspective and is a great reminder of the importance of health.

Find your reasons and your motivation and cling to those tenaciously!

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You've gotten some great thoughts about the food stuff.  Remember, too, that stress is insidious and it's much harder to treat yourself well (which is to say, healthfully) when you are stressed.  So prioritize the things that help you deal with stress.  For me, the most important is sleep.  If I don't get enough sleep, everything else is Just Too Hard.  Including eating well!  Other ways of reducing stress, like meditation/prayer, yoga, walking and other gentle exercise, all help too.  In fact, just consciously breathing in and out a few times helps enormously!

 

So when that Pop Tart urge comes, you might want to recognize it as your body's plea to reduce your stress levels.  Hugs, hot showers, naps, and talking a walk are all more effective ways to reduce stress.  If you can do any or all of them, you may find it easier to keep eating the eggs, veggies, and olives breakfast.  (Which, by the way, sounds fantastic!)

ThyPeace, now wants olives.  Later, body.  Later.

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Thank you everyone! Lots of good thoughts to help me through. I am being pulled in two directions. One minute I am resolute that I will eat healthy from this moment on, the next minute I am using every ounce of my will power not to get something, anything, sweet.

I made it through lunch. I had baked chicken, carrots, salad, and fruit. I passed up the dinner rolls and cookies. Lots of water.

ThyPeace, I think you might be right with stress. I am an introvert who functions well in an extrovert world, but I need solitude to rejuvenate. I haven't had a moment alone in two months. Mother-in-law wakes early, so I don't even have my early morning quiet time.

MTNan, thanks, I listened to you and am trying to focus on how I want to feel. I am so tired of feeling so sluggish!!

Shannon, thanks. You are right. Sugar dragon hasn't defeated me, it just feels that way. Boy it is strong.

Gardener, thanks for kind words.

One thing keeping me from going for sugar right this minute is that I don't want to have to come back to this thread and confess it.

Blessings!!

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Ok. It is 9:30pm and I am in bed. I did it! I completed one day of return to healthy eating. It was so incredibly hard not to eat sugar!! I actually had a little cinnamon roll in plastic wrap in my hand at one point. But I put it back in the pantry. So hard. I spent all day fighting my screaming dopamine receptors. I know tomorrow will be easier. I kept telling myself to get through one day. One day. I have a headache from the lack of caffeine and chocolate. Will take Advil if it interferes with my sleep. Spent evening working on a puzzle with my mother-in-law, that helped the time pass and kept her distracted for her pain. Thanks for listening!!

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Just wanted to pop in to say that you're doing great! It's really hard to do what you're doing, so kudos to you. I second the motion to treat yourself in a non-food way if you can so you still feel like you're getting something special. Even if it's drinking out of a fancy glass after dinner (not wine!) do something so that your brain knows you aren't punishing yourself. Paint your nails, take a bath, even if it's just shaving your legs (because if you get a good shave isn't it tempting to run around the house without pants on screaming that you are a goddess? So SMOOOOOOOOOOOOOTH. Or maybe it's just me...). Take some time and read a book you want to read (but don't have to read). Just do something nice for yourself.

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I'm hoping that I'm back in the groove. Cooked a good breakfast and a good lunch and have plans and ingredients for supper. I did crave coffee big time this morning. Going to go back to posting my food in my post-whole30 log for a while.

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One suggestion - sit down, make a list of all the reasons you want to do a Whole30 or just eat well. Post it somewhere and use it when you feel weak.

Don't beat yourself up. And eat plenty of starchy veggies.

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"I am an introvert who functions well in an extrovert world, but I need solutitude to rejuvenate. I haven't had a moment alone in two months."

 

Oh my goodness.  How hard is that??  I am also an introvert -- I suppose these boards of full of those of us who really need Quiet Time.  I just realized a few years ago that I spent my entire adolescence angry because my family was so darned LOUD all the time.  Went upstairs and slammed my door after supper every night for about four years.  You'd think they might have noticed that I needed something different, but bah.  Things were a little crazy back then.  We all made it through.

 

In any event, I am so glad you made it through the last few meals!  Just keep reducing those stress levels in non-food ways.  Breathe!  Talk to us.  Pet an animal or small sleeping human.  The time on a puzzle sounds great to me, too.  My entire family can zone on a puzzle for hours.  Good quiet way to connect and rest the brain at the same time.

 

ThyPeace, and remember to sleep when you can.

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One suggestion - sit down, make a list of all the reasons you want to do a Whole30 or just eat well. Post it somewhere and use it when you feel weak.

Don't beat yourself up. And eat plenty of starchy veggies.

Ok. I am going to make a list. Thanks!!

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"I am an introvert who functions well in an extrovert world, but I need solutitude to rejuvenate. I haven't had a moment alone in two months."

 

Oh my goodness.  How hard is that??  I am also an introvert -- I suppose these boards of full of those of us who really need Quiet Time.  I just realized a few years ago that I spent my entire adolescence angry because my family was so darned LOUD all the time.  Went upstairs and slammed my door after supper every night for about four years.  You'd think they might have noticed that I needed something different, but bah.  Things were a little crazy back then.  We all made it through.

 

In any event, I am so glad you made it through the last few meals!  Just keep reducing those stress levels in non-food ways.  Breathe!  Talk to us.  Pet an animal or small sleeping human.  The time on a puzzle sounds great to me, too.  My entire family can zone on a puzzle for hours.  Good quiet way to connect and rest the brain at the same time.

 

ThyPeace, and remember to sleep when you can.

There is an excellent book about introverts entitled "Quiet: The power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking." It is a little more critical of extroverts than it needs to be, but awesome for understanding why I am the way I am. Thanks for support! This forum is saving me!

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Hi WholeSue!

Glad to see you're finding your way through the maze, and getting the support you need. I agree wholeheartedly with ThyPeace''s comment about stress levels. As a psychotherapist with a holistic approach to mental wellness and overall well-being, I can assure you that sticking to healthy choices is tremendously difficult under chronic stress conditions. That Dopamine buzz is so attractive as a break/relief from the high Cortisol levels (stress hormone) of overwhelm and anxiety. As the Hartwigs say, we can't look for a nutrition solution to a lifestyle problem… So I send you courage, strength, and wisdom as you navigate towards improved self-care and creative ways of reducing stress (to the best of your ability given your life conditions at this time).

Take care. : )

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Hi WholeSue!

Glad to see you're finding your way through the maze, and getting the support you need. I agree wholeheartedly with ThyPeace''s comment about stress levels. As a psychotherapist with a holistic approach to mental wellness and overall well-being, I can assure you that sticking to healthy choices is tremendously difficult under chronic stress conditions. That Dopamine buzz is so attractive as a break/relief from the high Cortisol levels (stress hormone) of overwhelm and anxiety. As the Hartwigs say, we can't look for a nutrition solution to a lifestyle problem… So I send you courage, strength, and wisdom as you navigate towards improved self-care and creative ways of reducing stress (to the best of your ability given your life conditions at this time).

Take care. : )

I think you are right about stress. As I look back over the last month, I can see how I let it take over. I am not good about planning deliberate actions that reduce stress. Thanks for the help in getting my understanding to a new level.

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Yay you!!  I am glad you are seeing some new ways to look at it.  So, dare I ask... what have you done to reduce your stress levels today?

 

 

ThyPeace, all about action.  Breathing in and out counts as action.

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Yay you!!  I am glad you are seeing some new ways to look at it.  So, dare I ask... what have you done to reduce your stress levels today?

 

 

ThyPeace, all about action.  Breathing in and out counts as action.

Yes, dare ask. I actually did focus on my breathing for a few moments this morning. I switched to decaf because I know caffeine increases anxiety in me. Had massive withdrawal headache yesterday, but better today. I worked on a puzzle for ten minutes after lunch when my sugar cravings hit. Worked on some things this morning that I was putting off because they are stressful, the procrastination was causing more stress than just being a grown up and getting them done.

Other things that I can do:

- Use touching the steering wheel each time I get in my car as a trigger to focus on a few breaths. (Used to do this, it helps.)

- Pray.

- Get a pedicure.

- Text a friend who is always understanding

- Post on whole30 forum

- Visit with my chickens :-)

- Spend time with my cats

- Watch a favorite TV show

- Yard work, when the weather cools

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Worked on some things this morning that I was putting off because they are stressful, the procrastination was causing more stress than just being a grown up and getting them done.

 

THAT SO MUCH! I'm terrible about procrastinating but I'm finally getting to the point that I've realized that procrastinating sometimes makes me feel worse. Now if I can just get hubby on board so that I don't get stressed after he makes a meal and then leaves all the dishes on the counters/in the sinks but then he says "don't put those away, I'll get them." Um, when? We're killing hundreds of fruit flies a week in our traps...let's not make the problem worse please...

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THAT SO MUCH! I'm terrible about procrastinating but I'm finally getting to the point that I've realized that procrastinating sometimes makes me feel worse. Now if I can just get hubby on board so that I don't get stressed after he makes a meal and then leaves all the dishes on the counters/in the sinks but then he says "don't put those away, I'll get them." Um, when? We're killing hundreds of fruit flies a week in our traps...let's not make the problem worse please...

I'm a terrible procrastinator and am dealing with a strong bout of it right now at work....which is only going to cause a shitstorm if I let it go on any longer. And yet.........I continue to distract myself with everything but what is important. Smart.

Re: fruit fly traps. We have quite a few of the little devils right now too (they love the kombucha too and try to break into my scoby hotels on the regular). I use a little dish of ACV with a drop of soap in it stirred around to break the surface tension so they drown the second they touch onto the ACV. Works like a DAMN. I stick one dish under the cupboard with the compost, one on the top of the counter near the produce and one in the cabinet with the scoby hotels and there are always hoardes of them dead.

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Awesome job on the de-stressing, Whole30Sue!  I particularly like the touch-point for remembering to breathe.  I do it when I'm putting on my makeup in the morning -- focus on JUST putting on the makeup and breathing, and not spending most of that time with my mind wandering all over random thoughts like a hyperactive kid on a trampoline.  (DD is ADHD and a gymnast.  I know what that combination looks like.)  

 

MrsStick and LadyShanny, there's this thing about Getting Things Done (yes it's a book title) that I really like.  The worry and churning in your mind is usually far worse than the actual doing of whatever it is.  And one reason that your brain is churning is because you're holding far too much in your head, rather than putting it somewhere else.  If you sit down and write down Every. Single. Thing. you need to get done, it will be a very long list.  That's okay!  It helps because now it's all in one place.  And even better, if you go ahead and DO each item that will take less than 2 minutes, you'll get a lot of it accomplished.  Then you can go back and work on little things in chunks (15 minutes at a time) and make bigger things into chunks that you can do in series to get it all done.

 

That's probably not nearly clear enough.  Really what I should be doing is noting that FlyLady and Getting Things Done are the best two I've ever seen at helping with procrastinating.

 

ThyPeace, has a job that requires rapid completion of fairly broad and complex tasks.  It keeps her entertained and yet still the laundry sometimes seems like an impossible challenge.

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MrsStick and LadyShanny, there's this thing about Getting Things Done (yes it's a book title) that I really like.  The worry and churning in your mind is usually far worse than the actual doing of whatever it is.  And one reason that your brain is churning is because you're holding far too much in your head, rather than putting it somewhere else.  If you sit down and write down Every. Single. Thing. you need to get done, it will be a very long list.  That's okay!  It helps because now it's all in one place.  And even better, if you go ahead and DO each item that will take less than 2 minutes, you'll get a lot of it accomplished.  Then you can go back and work on little things in chunks (15 minutes at a time) and make bigger things into chunks that you can do in series to get it all done.

 

Thanks Thypeace!  I have been through this cycle before and I always come out the end thinking "well that wasn't so bad, why did I wait so long/avoid it so long and stress myself silly?" and yet I find myself back in the same boat before too long.

 

Funny that you say it's a result of too much in your head....because my chiropractor told me the other day that he can tell that I'm in my head and thinking way too much right now.  Maybe I shall try the list making..........I know when I've tried it in the past th elist is actually stupidly short when it comes to the important things, it's just my brain that gets all wrapped up and discombobulated.

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I'm a terrible procrastinator and am dealing with a strong bout of it right now at work....which is only going to cause a shitstorm if I let it go on any longer. And yet.........I continue to distract myself with everything but what is important. Smart.

Re: fruit fly traps. We have quite a few of the little devils right now too (they love the kombucha too and try to break into my scoby hotels on the regular). I use a little dish of ACV with a drop of soap in it stirred around to break the surface tension so they drown the second they touch onto the ACV. Works like a DAMN. I stick one dish under the cupboard with the compost, one on the top of the counter near the produce and one in the cabinet with the scoby hotels and there are always hoardes of them dead.

 

I've been using unflavored extremely strong kombucha (really need to get off my butt...3 month-old KT is straight vinegar at this point) with a drop of soap as my fruit fly traps. They're doing *quite* well, MWAHAHAHA.

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Soo.... how's everyone doing on (ending the) procrastinating?

 

Alternatively, anyone gotten anything done lately?

 

ThyPeace, had 120 emails in her inbox at noon.  Now has 54.

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