Riana J Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 Just need to vent a little. I have "dieted" for over half of my life, starting with Weight Watchers at age 12, and I am finally in a much better place in my life. I think my body dysmorphia has mostly faded away and I overall live a really active and healthy lifestyle. I no longer think of my eating choices as a "diet" but a way of life. I try to live by the mantra eat to live but I do enjoy sweets, cocktails and wine (hence my journey into my current Whole30!) I am enduring my fourth Whole30 (on Day 4 now!) and feel really excited and optimistic about it. The only thing is, I get really anxious about being in situations when I need to explain to others what/why I'm doing what I'm doing. I work in hospitality marketing and last night I was at a client event where everyone was eating fried chicken and french fries. I was going to hold off on eating and eat a dinner when I got home, but there was a kale salad with grilled chicken on the menu and I saw a few others who were ordering sandwiches, so I went for it. Mid-first bite, my boss calls out, while standing next to the client, "Why are you eating a salad?!" I blushed and just thought of the first and easiest response: "I can't eat bread." and she replied "OhHHHHH I didn't know that." Not only was it embarrassing but it pissed me off! Working in food has been hard on me. I gain weight easily and with many meals out and cocktails, I have put on a few pounds. This Whole30 was my attempt to get back on track. My family, boyfriend and a selection of my friends are supportive but I am nervous as I am going to my boyfriend's roommate's girlfriends (PHEW, mouthful) birthday party on Saturday night and I know people will be drinking and indulging in tacos. I know how to navigate the menu-- that really isnt the problem for me. I more worry about people remarking over why I am abstaining from X Y and Z. It doesn't make me want to stop but it pisses me off really badly! Any tips on how to not get anxious/angry when people give you unwanted attention over your dietary choices? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeadowLily Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 Clear the decks. Try to draw the attention away from what you're doing and what you're eating. Don't go there. Engage your friends and coworkers in conversation that appeals to them which would be about themselves. Everyone wants to talk about something they're doing. Google Whole 30 Friends and Family and it will give you tips how to respond to the naysayers and Debbie Downers. Everyone has an opinion about what we should be doing but until they can look into their own backyard, help them stay out of yours. We all need boundaries with people. Shut the door to the Peanut Gallery. You can do it in a graceful way. It just takes a little practice. They don't have to live in your body. Your food choices are your business. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators ShannonM816 Posted September 17, 2015 Moderators Share Posted September 17, 2015 Had my boss called me out like that in front of everyone, I probably would have just said, "it sounded good." End of story. Be careful with the "I can't" statements, as then if you have those things again at some point later, after Whole30, it may cause some confusion for people, or they may feel you've been dishonest in some way. Really, most people don't care what you're eating, other than apparently your boss -- and if these kind of events are regular occurrences in your job, you might pull him aside sometime (when you're both calm and have a few free minutes) and just mention that sometimes your meals may be different, and you'd appreciate not being called out. You don't have to go into what Whole30 is, it could be as simple as, I feel better when I eat this, or don't eat that. Obviously, I don't know your boss, and there are people who just are jerks and would then proceed to call you out at every.single.meeting.forever -- but most people aren't like that, and he may have just not been thinking beyond, why would anyone turn down fried chicken to have a salad? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riana J Posted September 17, 2015 Author Share Posted September 17, 2015 Be careful with the "I can't" statements, as then if you have those things again at some point later, after Whole30, it may cause some confusion for people, or they may feel you've been dishonest in some way. Funny, I regretted saying it immediately after as I was thinking that might happen later on at the job. I was so caught off guard I didn't even know how to respond! Moving forward I'll definitely think before speaking as I do not want to be called out if I decide to indulge in fried chicken in the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saree_maree Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 After your Whole30, if you eat do choose to eat bread in front of that person and she says something about it, you can always tell her that you were undergoing allergy testing at that time, and as it turns out, you're not allergic to wheat, or gluten, or whatever. If she even remembers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riana J Posted September 17, 2015 Author Share Posted September 17, 2015 After your Whole30, if you eat do choose to eat bread in front of that person and she says something about it, you can always tell her that you were undergoing allergy testing at that time, and as it turns out, you're not allergic to wheat, or gluten, or whatever. If she even remembers! Good point Thanks for the tip. Clearly I need this to put my anxious mind at ease. Oy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Britishgal Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 I'd probably have asked "what's wrong with a salad" Or you could have said what my mother does when we do or say something socially unacceptable or rude...think posh English woman in an imperious tone: "where were you dragged up? The gutter?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raven Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 You don't have to go into what Whole30 is, it could be as simple as, I feel better when I eat this, or don't eat that. I agree with Shannon here! The simplest thing if you NEED to give a reason is to say, "I feel good eating this way." It's hard to come up with an argument against feeling good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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