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Feel like crap... And I caved


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For the past few days, I've been feeling like CRAP. We are talking the worst headache and stomachache ever. I couldn't even eat dinner last night because I felt so sick.

To make matters worse, it was my job to make cotton candy at a fall festival thingy at my workplace. I tried to get out of it... I REALLY did, but I had no choice, and I caved. This was followed by a terrible meal at Smashburger.

So, I have to start over, but I'm nervous. I came into this thinking I could still go out and eat with my friends, but clearly that isn't the case. I just don't know if I can deal with feeling so deprived. Next time I go out to eat with my best friend I have to sit and watch him eat because I think bringing my own dinner into a restaurant is beyond rude and disrespectful. Then, of course, my best friend will feel uncomfortable, but what choice do I have?

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Lissa,

I hinted at it before, but I'll come right out and say it now: you must stop allowing yourself to be victimized by your circumstances. If this is something you want for your personal health, you are going to have to fight for it. You can work a cotton candy machine without eating it. You make a decision every time you open your mouth to eat something.

Instead of watching your friend eat at a non-compliant restaurant, suggest one where you know you can eat. Do a little research. Invite him over for dinner or offer to cook at his place. Keep some Primal Pacs with you, eat them in your car, and go out with your youth group. Take ownership of your choices.

In this program, and in life in general, success and discipline comes from practicing active decision making.

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Lissa, I agree with Robin-sounds like a motivation issue, not a circumstance issue. Possibly, also you've got yourself in a dieter's mentality, which doesn't help. I've had to remind myself a few times that this isn't a diet. To me, it's a science experiment. I want to know what my body will do if I take away all the bad stuff. So I' m not really tempted to eat bad stuff because it would mess up my petri dish so to speak. Yesterday I didn't plan well and ended up eating guacamole and vegetables for lunch at work. I was hungry for a while, but that didn't kill me and you're strong enough too!

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Robin is giving you really good advice. You have to make the decision to do this and then figure out how it will work for you. There are many creative ways that don't insult your manners (which are great!) but also allow you to still spend time with your friends. Eating an awesome (and compliant) meal before making cotton candy might be a good strategy to avoid letting that derail you. Remind yourself of the reasons that you are doing this.

You can do this, you just have to choose to! :)

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I still can't find Primal Pacs anywhere.

I suppose I'll order steamed veggies next time I go out because its the only thing I can somewhat trust eating out... my friend won't come over for dinner (my parents hate him) and we can't cook at his place, so eating out is our only option.

And for the record, I did eat before I went into work, and I tried to get out of working the cotton candy machine, but they didn't give me a choice. I had to stand over the machine and spin cotton candy... and then deal with people pushing it in my face asking if I wanted some. Since cotton candy is a trigger food for me on a normal day, I ESPECIALLY was tempted yesterday, and I snapped. The only way for me to deal with temptations like that is to get away from them, and I couldn't.

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Trust me I know how it feels to be tempted by food at work. I work at a cooking school and am constantly surrounded by food that is tempting! BUT I think about how I will feel once I eat that food and that is enough to deter me.

I think it's just a matter of saying well this is something I'm doing for me and other people will just have to get used to it. I'm constantly being asked at work if I want to try this or try that but I just politely decline, I mean they can't shove food down my mouth!

Good luck to you!

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So, I have to start over, but I'm nervous. I came into this thinking I could still go out and eat with my friends, but clearly that isn't the case. I just don't know if I can deal with feeling so deprived. Next time I go out to eat with my best friend I have to sit and watch him eat because I think bringing my own dinner into a restaurant is beyond rude and disrespectful. Then, of course, my best friend will feel uncomfortable, but what choice do I have?

I went out to dinner this weekend with a friend (who is not Whole 30) and I politely asked if my dish could be prepared without the sauce and a side of veggies with no butter. And to my surprise they were more than accomodating as well as even steaming the veggies and then topping with olive oil. So it never hurts to ask and that is far from being rude. My friend did tease my a bit but he knows how important this is to me so the end result was both of us fed and happy.

We always have a choice and sometimes it must be a meal at a time choice. Plan ahead as much as possible but know that sometimes we are faced with unforeseen circumstances and you have to make the best choice for you in that moment, even if others may not like it or feel uncomfortable with it.

Be strong and go into the next Whole 30 confident that you will be successful.

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I still can't find Primal Pacs anywhere.

I suppose I'll order steamed veggies next time I go out because its the only thing I can somewhat trust eating out... my friend won't come over for dinner (my parents hate him) and we can't cook at his place, so eating out is our only option.

And for the record, I did eat before I went into work, and I tried to get out of working the cotton candy machine, but they didn't give me a choice. I had to stand over the machine and spin cotton candy... and then deal with people pushing it in my face asking if I wanted some. Since cotton candy is a trigger food for me on a normal day, I ESPECIALLY was tempted yesterday, and I snapped. The only way for me to deal with temptations like that is to get away from them, and I couldn't.

I hope you aren't offended by what I am about to say, but I feel you are ignoring really good advice from Robin and others and falling back on being the victim in why you can't make this work. I think it's more you won't make it work. I eat out all the time. I may not get grassfed beef or pastured chicken, but I simply account for that and remove visible fat and skin. If you go to restaurants that are reputable and truly care about making their customers happy, it's easy. Think of a menu as an ingredients list. It becomes a fun challenge. If this means enough to you, you won't care how many cotton candy machines you have to work at. You will simply make the choice to serve the cotton candy and not eat it. It's all about choice.

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As Yoda says

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Love this Derval. I actually had to slice and serve wedding cake yesterday. Never took a bite. Was covered in frosting and simply washed my hands when I was done. I knew before going to the wedding I wouldn't have cake. Slicing and serving didn't change my decision. It was already a done deal.

Good luck Lissa. You CAN do this.

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I've had to remind myself a few times that this isn't a diet.

THIS!!! I know how hard it can be to shift from a diet-mentality. I've been on and off (mostly off) another diet plan most of my adult life. I was so used to thinking about portions, counting points, budgeting points, etc etc etc. The first week of my W30 was so tough in that regard...it was almost like there wasn't enough structure for me. Once I shifted my thinking from this being a "diet" to this being a lifestyle and being for my own health and well-being, it started coming easier to me. Not to say it's easy...but it felt like less pressure. The first week I felt like I was watching the clock...just waiting for these 30 days to be over so I could eat whatever I darn well wanted. Now, on day 18, I don't feel that way anymore, and actually have very few real cravings. YOU have to make the choice to do this, no one else will do it for you! Good luck, you can do it!!

PS- jhmomi, you are my hero. That's quite the dedication working at the cake table! Well done!:)

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