Super frustrated

[ldauga]

I am super frustrated with my Whole 30 efforts. I desperately want to do the Whole 30. I desperately need to do the Whole 30. But, I am dealing with a few issues post brain surgery (twice this year) that contributes to my failure, due to fatigue and reaching for something easy and pain that ultimately wears down my resolve.

This is frustrating because I know this would be beneficial to my health right now! I don't want to wait to do this because I am experiencing high levels of inflammation in my body and I'd like to do something right now, eager than wait. Because honestly, who knows when the rest will get better.

Can anyone please provide me a few tips for success? I am a great cook and managed to work around two young kids and a husband who guzzles Coca Cola, so that's not the problem. It's the reaching for simplicity and comfort :-( I've only made it about eight days thus far three times

Thank you so very much!

[jmcbn]

Have you looked back to determine what it was that lead up to the point where you reached for something simple?

Perhaps there is a trigger (emotional, physical or otherwise) that, once identified, can be better dealt with?

Have you been ensuring you eat enough fat??? Often a lack of fat will contribute to cravings & a need to snack.....

Did you have compliant prepped food available that you could have reached for but chose not to?

[ldauga]

Thank you for your response. Typically, the trigger would be a physical one, combined with a stress response. I experience some residual pain from my brain surgeries and am actually having another one at the end of October. When I'm hurting, it's so easy to just be like "screw it" and then I regret it. The other times have been when dining out with family and/or friends. 

 

I do make sure I get enough fat. It's definitely not a lack of food. I eat ghee and coconut oil liberally and add meats to every meal. I have struggled with enough fat before and learned to remedy that very quickly! It does make you feel like garbage if you don't have enough. 

 

At this point, I truly do believe it is emotional/willpower. A combination of hopelessness (this will not get better) with dealing with frustration from the condition. Which is asinine for me to do, since I work in healthcare and have a ridiculous education that tells me why this is good for me...

 

:/

[GFChris]

Thank you for your response. Typically, the trigger would be a physical one, combined with a stress response. I experience some residual pain from my brain surgeries and am actually having another one at the end of October. When I'm hurting, it's so easy to just be like "screw it" and then I regret it. The other times have been when dining out with family and/or friends. 

 

I do make sure I get enough fat. It's definitely not a lack of food. I eat ghee and coconut oil liberally and add meats to every meal. I have struggled with enough fat before and learned to remedy that very quickly! It does make you feel like garbage if you don't have enough. 

 

At this point, I truly do believe it is emotional/willpower. A combination of hopelessness (this will not get better) with dealing with frustration from the condition. Which is asinine for me to do, since I work in healthcare and have a ridiculous education that tells me why this is good for me...

 

:/

 

Willpower is only a piece of the picture. There's brain science here.

 

Your habits up until now have created grooves in your brain to respond a certain way when a stress trigger occurs.  Whole30 is one example of changing your habits to respond differently. You're literally creating new grooves in your brain. I equate it to training a puppy: it's not the puppy's willpower that determines whether they will behave in a different way - it's repeating a certain new behavior over and over until the new groove is created to instill the new habit.

I encourage you to give yourself LOTS of self-compassion at this time, and to take things one day at a time or one meal at a time, if necessary. Before you restart, identify your triggers, along with the new non-food responses you want to take instead. Then start teaching your brain these new ways of being.

[ldauga]

Maybe that's why I'm struggling. I am 32, but had seven strokes this year due to two brain aneurysm surgeries. I have been beating myself up a bit because I feel a bit like a failure. It feels as if there is more on the line for me in being successful, but I haven't been able to execute it well. 

 

I want to begin now, although I do have surgery again October 26, but maybe I shouldn't call that my "Whole30". I should give it my best effort now and then start my actual Whole30 once I am released from the hospital. 

 

I so appreciate both of your compassion and support. I know that this is about all of our health, but considering my current issue, it just feels so much more imperative for me. 

[chezjulie]

Ldauga, the Whole30 is a big challenge for people who haven't had mulitple strokes and surgeries. We all feel tempted to reach for something easy that we think of as comforting when we've had a bad day. A lot of people have false starts before they make it through 30 days. You're not a failure! In fact in your three attempts, you've almost had 30 days of Whole30 eating! You just have to put them in a row next. 

 

I  think that that's a great idea to give it your best effort now and then start your actual Whole30 when you're past your surgery. You could use the next few weeks to come up with a list of ideas for soothing compliant foods (sweet potatoes?) or compliant meals at your favorite restaurants. That way you won't feel like you're wasting your time; you'll be preparing to be successful. 

 

Best wishes for your surgery, too. 

[QuilterInVA]

Right now, just do what you can. Could you do some batch cooking and put meals in the freezer for those times you want to get a simple meal together without fuss?

[ldauga]

Thank y'all so much for the encouragement. I do believe that I am going to put forth my best effort, considering my impending neurosurgery, and cut myself some slack until after healing. I plan to start my Whole 13 (I kid) on Sunday, after my wedding anniversary.