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Brewer5: A Fresh Start


Brewer5

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My SO Jason actually did my first Whole30 with me, and did great.  But he stopped immediately at 30 days lololol.  Interestingly enough, he's had some GI issues when eating pasta lately, so I think the lightbulb may be coming on in that department.  He's always been a relatively healthy eater to begin with, as he cut processed sugar completely from his life over 10 years ago and never went back, but he does love his pizza and beer LOL.  

 

My SO Rob struggles with the fat is your friend concept.  Now I get it - he's been told for years to avoid all fats because of his family's cholesterol problems. He hasn't had a problem giving up pasta and bread - in fact he has said he doesn't miss them - but he hasn't made the connection yet that the cholesterol problems are related to the high amount of grains his family consumes, and not fats.  He is eating mostly whole 30 style these days - but will not add any extra fat to his meals as he is convinced it is bad for him.....

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And eating a boatload of fruit..... :(

 

But I can't say anything.... because I don't know more than his Dr.  :(

 

I get that he's scared to embrace our way of eating because of his heart attack history (had a HA at the age of 42 on Dec 1/14) but honestly - I worry.  

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And eating a boatload of fruit..... :(

 

But I can't say anything.... because I don't know more than his Dr.  :(

 

I get that he's scared to embrace our way of eating because of his heart attack history (had a HA at the age of 42 on Dec 1/14) but honestly - I worry.  

As a cardiac nurse, I can say I feel the advice they give post heart attack patient is WRONG.  But your SO won't be able to safely raise the amount of fat he's eating if he is also consuming "boatloads" of sugar daily.  Because that WILL absolutely be a horrible combination.  He would really have to come to the dark (keto) side lol for him to load up on fat without worry about negative effects.  Heart attacks are the children of inflammation and high sugar diets.  Period.  That is what leads to plaque building up in blood vessels, and eventually to blockages.  I would encourage you guys to look for a cardiologist who is open to this line of thinking, but I also know that can be hard.  I cannot stress enough that it's one or the other.  He can't have his fruit and eat it too if he is going to increase his fat.  I'm not a doctor either, I'm "just a nurse." But half the docs I know have their head up their ass when it comes to nutrition.

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Carla, I'm sorry to hear he is still struggling... but it sounds like he IS making progress... just a little at a time.  

 

I think cutting out the bread & pasta is a HUGE step in the right direction!

 

I really, really, really wish you could get him to read Grain Brain.  Tell him I'll send him a giant fruit basket if he still wants it, after he reads through the entire thing ~ but he has to use his highlighter!   :lol:

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I have someone in my life that's similar.  He's had a couple of heart attacks and a cardiac arrest in the last few years, and has followed his doctor's dietary advice to the LETTER.  His wife lovingly cooks all his meals low low low fat with no salt, and every time I eat dinner there, I cringe.  I've tried to have the conversation very gently, but it goes nowhere.  I watch him take his pile of evening pills, and eat his boneless, skinless chicken breast and plain veggies, and it just kills me.  But I have to not internalize it and remind myself that you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink.  It's so much easier with my patients, who are strangers.  But when it's someone you care about, it's SO much harder.  I'll keep trying though.  Because I care.    

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But your SO won't be able to safely raise the amount of fat he's eating if he is also consuming "boatloads" of sugar daily.  Because that WILL absolutely be a horrible combination.  He would really have to come to the dark (keto) side lol for him to load up on fat without worry about negative effects.

 

 

I am glad you said this, Jess.

 

I see a lot of folks here who are trying to eat a lot of starchy carbs & fruit, AND trying to raise their fat, according to the template suggestions... and then wondering why their pants are getting tight, why they aren't seeing the results they want, etc.

 

A high fat + high sugar diet is SAD.  I've come to realize that the same physiological effects can be replicated within a Whole 30, if people don't understand what they are doing.  They feel better ...  Yes, of course they do, because they have cut out a lot of harmful ingredients, and they are including a lot more nutrients.  But there is absolutely no guarantee of weight loss, or even improved health markers -- if they have replaced their SAD foods with Whole 30 compliant foods and are still eating a high-fat, high-sugar diet.

 

You cannot do both.  It has to be one or the other.  We all know that high-sugar gets us nowhere good... so what does that leave?

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Carla, I'm sorry to hear he is still struggling... but it sounds like he IS making progress... just a little at a time.  

 

I think cutting out the bread & pasta is a HUGE step in the right direction!

 

I really, really, really wish you could get him to read Grain Brain.  Tell him I'll send him a giant fruit basket if he still wants it, after he reads through the entire thing ~ but he has to use his highlighter!   :lol:

 

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :huh:

 

Yes he is making baby steps.....  but getting the buy in is not great.  He has at least cut back on the alcohol consumption - not that he consumed a lot of it - but he seems to have replaced alcohol with fruit.... sigh.  

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:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :huh:

 

Yes he is making baby steps.....  but getting the buy in is not great.  He has at least cut back on the alcohol consumption - not that he consumed a lot of it - but he seems to have replaced alcohol with fruit.... sigh.  

Carla, I'm sure you realize, this is more dangerous to him from a cardiovascular perspective than anything else.  If you feel comfortable tough-loving him on this issue, now would be the time.  All that sugar circulating in his blood stream is doing more damage to his blood vessels by the minute.  He needs to cut that crap out.  NOW.  Fruit is a SOMETIMES FOOD.  For EVERYONE.  And for me, it's pretty much a never food.  If he's afraid of fat, make the point- all that sugar in the fruit is more artery clogging than any fat he could ever eat.  I'm dead serious.  Cutting bread and pasta are great accomplishments and good baby steps, but the truth is, piles of fruit are metabolically NO DIFFERENT.  Same effect.  

It must be really hard for you to know this and still watch him make those choices, I'm sorry :(  

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Carla, I'm sure you realize, this is more dangerous to him from a cardiovascular perspective than anything else.  If you feel comfortable tough-loving him on this issue, now would be the time.  All that sugar circulating in his blood stream is doing more damage to his blood vessels by the minute.  He needs to cut that crap out.  NOW.  Fruit is a SOMETIMES FOOD.  For EVERYONE.  And for me, it's pretty much a never food.  If he's afraid of fat, make the point- all that sugar in the fruit is more artery clogging than any fat he could ever eat.  I'm dead serious.  Cutting bread and pasta are great accomplishments and good baby steps, but the truth is, piles of fruit are metabolically NO DIFFERENT.  Same effect.  

It must be really hard for you to know this and still watch him make those choices, I'm sorry :(

 

Yes I do know this.  And every time he grabs a fruit I ask him if he couldn't be snacking on something better.  I'm not sure how to get through to him on this.  It's kind of like looking in a mirror oddly enough.  I mean I got lectured for years on my weight, and how I should exercise, and I should eat better etc, etc. I HATED this.  (I'm sure there are many people who were in the same boat and hated it as well) And now part of me is feeling like I am doing the exact same to Rob.  And I hate it.  But I'm trying to help him.  And those people who lectured me were trying to help me as well.  

 

I have to try to find a different way.....

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I have to try to find a different way.....

I TOTALLY get that.  I've been harassed by well-meaning family members most of my life about my weight and eating habits.  And it never fostered any positive changes in my life.  

BUT

I hadn't had a heart attack.  And no one was trying to save my life, at least not directly.  Of course, they gave me the "I'm worried about your health" argument, but I had no health problems to back that up.  So it fell on deaf ears.  In Rob's case, I would argue that his life is in danger.

Trust me, part of my profession is trying to convince people to make huge changes.  And it's HARD.  There is no hard and fast piece of advice that works or gets through to everyone.  You know him well, certainly better than any of us.  Continue to brain-storm ways to maybe start picking away at those closely-held ideas and habits he has, and I'll continue to think about it too.  I think watching That Sugar Film is a GREAT START.

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Carla, it is easier for me to sit back and say this, I know ~ because my husband has not had a heart attack.  Yet.

 

But I have found that I really do lead best by example.  

 

Maybe make a conscious effort ...for a little while anyway, as an experiment... to just really focus on YOU.   I know you do, anyway ~ I'm just saying ~ if he sees you happy, and vibrant, and energetic, and not struggling and constantly craving...  If he sees you clear-headed, and upbeat, and you keep a real can-do attitude about things...  Over time, there will be a glaring disparity between how you are feeling on a daily basis vs. how he is.

 

My husband ate a lot of crap throughout the Holidays ~ I mean, for him, it was A LOT.

 

I chitter chattered here and there about the folks I was helping online...  I talked with him about the addiction discussions...  I shared with him my triumphs as well as my frustrations with the forum...  But through all of this ~ none of it was ever directed AT him.  I knew he was struggling, I could see it.  I could clearly recognize the pattern he was in ~ and I hated it for him ~ but I also knew that he got there on his own, and he had to come out of it on his own.   And he did.  

 

He has now gone back to low-carb all week with a carb night on the weekend.  And that works for him.  It did not work for me, and I do not partake.  The kids do have some of his stuff, though ~ and guess what he gets to see there?  How the junk affects their moods and behavior.  He's already decided, based on that ~ that for Super Bowl, we'll be making things at home instead of ordering take-out.  Mmmm-hmmm... that's what I thought.   ;)   But I let him make the choices, and I let him see the consequences of those choices.  

 

And every day, he also sees me on a really good path.  I am finally... (mostly)...  at peace.

 

I am painfully aware that the choices I make affect everyone in this household.  If mama's eating junk -- guess what?  Everyone is eating junk.  I have said over and over again that having that sort of influence is both a blessing and a curse.  But I'll tell you what ~ it keeps me on my toes.  It keeps me very motivated to make the best choices I can for myself and for all of them, every day.  I am leading by example.  What example do I want that to be?

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Lately I have not been saying much to him.  Because I've noticed he snack hiding - I used to do it too - you know hide and eat things.  

 

If I comment on  the fruit thing - I usually get - what do I have against fruit?  Technically I have nothing against fruit - but one should not be eating 5 - 6 fruits a day.  I have explained to him all this fructose is damaging his liver.  He already has an inflamed liver. As do I - hence why fruit is kept at a minimum.  And alcohol has not made it back to my worth it list.

 

So basically I think I do need to shut up.  He's tired of hearing me lecture.  As Brewer said above - I think he needs to struggle through the things himself.  Except I am really and truly worried for him.  

 

I am thinking of asking that we possibly buy less fruit this week as I am finding it "triggering" to see him munching all the time.  Maybe if I make it about me - he will listen.

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Hi all - I've been lurking around your site for awhile - I always wonder if you know who reads your blog? - and am intrigued - but very confused about keto eating.  You've offered up books, etc - but is there a single or a few, idiot-newbie-focused, simple to understand 'guides' to starting?  My HDL/LDL numbers have always been great, but last checkup (after following whole30), HDL went way down, LDL went way up (still within recommended ranges, but concerning about the trend).  I'm worried keto-eating (sorry if that's not how to refer to it) would make my numbers worse.  Thanks for any suggestions.

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Lately I have not been saying much to him.  Because I've noticed he snack hiding - I used to do it too - you know hide and eat things.  

 

If I comment on  the fruit thing - I usually get - what do I have against fruit?  Technically I have nothing against fruit - but one should not be eating 5 - 6 fruits a day.  I have explained to him all this fructose is damaging his liver.  He already has an inflamed liver. As do I - hence why fruit is kept at a minimum.  And alcohol has not made it back to my worth it list.

 

So basically I think I do need to shut up.  He's tired of hearing me lecture.  As Brewer said above - I think he needs to struggle through the things himself.  Except I am really and truly worried for him.  

 

I am thinking of asking that we possibly buy less fruit this week as I am finding it "triggering" to see him munching all the time.  Maybe if I make it about me - he will listen.

Have you given him any info to Non Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease?  I'm sure you have but it's a real medical condition, rather than just having 'something against fruit'.

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Hi all - I've been lurking around your site for awhile - I always wonder if you know who reads your blog? - and am intrigued - but very confused about keto eating.  You've offered up books, etc - but is there a single or a few, idiot-newbie-focused, simple to understand 'guides' to starting?  My HDL/LDL numbers have always been great, but last checkup (after following whole30), HDL went way down, LDL went way up (still within recommended ranges, but concerning about the trend).  I'm worried keto-eating (sorry if that's not how to refer to it) would make my numbers worse.  Thanks for any suggestions.

 

Well, hello, CC!

 

Nope... I have no idea who all is out there reading.  I know I've got some friends ~ and I know I've got some weirdos ~ but hey, that's life, right?

 

:lol:

 

Happy to hear from you... and always happy to help.

 

I have seen no evidence that eating a keto diet would make your numbers worse ~ in fact, one of the main attractions of this way of eating is the huge improvement it can make to your overall health.  It just makes sense.

 

Listening to pretty much any of Jimmy Moore's podcasts you can get your hands on, would be a great learning experience.  Listen... see if it appeals to you... if not, move on to the next one.  He literally has over a thousand of them out there, I believe.  All available for free, through iTunes or his site.

 

Okay, so... I am going to throw some things at you ~ so you can take whatever you may find helpful.

 

First, from page 29 of this thread:

 

 

Loved the article Brewer.  I saw a new PCP last year and, at that time, I had been following a ketogenic diet for several months.  I told her I was eating LCHF and expected a negative response but didn't get one.  She was interested in what I ate, but beyond that didn't say a whole lot about it.  I saw her again on Monday.  She asked if I was still doing LCHF and I told her I flipped between that and Paleo, but for the most part still ate real food and didn't shy away from the fat at all. She just shook her head looking at my blood work results and said "I wish more of my patients ate that way - your numbers are amazing". I know this is the best way for me - I feel great and I am healthy.  And yes, I burn fat for fuel  :)

 

 

Second, I would love for you to watch this 18-minute TED talk, if you haven't already.  It's my favorite link, ever.  Worth every minute:

 

 

Okay, third...  I see you are not looking for books.  I am going to mention them to you anyway.  Jimmy Moore's books, Cholesterol Clarity (if you are really concerned and want to understand ALL the details of the great big cholesterol picture)  and Keto Clarity (if you really want to have ALL your questions answered and be fully in-the-know about ketogenic diets) ~ these are great resources.

 

If you just want a quick-start guide ~  Well.  There may be websites out there with this sort of info, or short kindle books you can find on Amazon, etc...  

 

This was a quick read, and I found it very informative ~ but I was also well-versed in the world of keto before I read it, so -- your mileage may vary.

 

http://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/151500581X?keywords=ketogenic%20diet&qid=1454620346&ref_=sr_1_7&sr=8-7

 

I think it's important to point out here, that what I've found works best for me is sticking to the Whole 30 foods for the most part ~ protein+veggie+fat ... protein+veggie+fat ... with SOME nuts and seeds in the mix, but not really any fruit or starchy vegetables.  So -- you don't necessarily need a "starter guide" of any sort, if what you want is to stick to a mostly Whole 30 lifestyle ~ but maybe tweak the template to better fit your own, individual needs and desires.

 

Here is a good list of carb content of vegetables, if you'd find this helpful.  I'm sure you can find info out there for fruit, as well.  Lemons, lime, and all sorts of berries are generally the lower-carb options.

 

http://www.ruled.me/best-low-carb-vegetables-ketogenic-diet/

 

Any other questions you have -- we're here.   :)  Welcome!

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Totally off topic but I wanna post my pet too!

 

Charlie Fluffypants.  20pounds of love... well... not quite.  He was a stray and he was also abused by my ex boyfriend so he's got some attitude problems but he loves me and he's finally figured out that I'm soft and warm so now we snuggle!  Took 8 years to get this cat to cuddle.

My friend Kat is a professional photographer and we got realllly drunk the night before this and woke up super hungover with no interest in going out of the house so we had an impromptu photoshoot instead!

 

DSC_0361.jpg

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Have you given him any info to Non Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease?  I'm sure you have but it's a real medical condition, rather than just having 'something against fruit'.

 

Sigh.  Yes we have.  But I'm sure it went in one ear and out the other.  As things sometimes do.

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Beautiful photo!!! And beautiful kitty!!!  

 

I have a few photographer friends - well not actually friends - I am related to them.  And the other one I work with.  I can't say I would get drunk with them though.... ;)

Thanks!  He's the best looking stray cat a girl could ask for!  I'm still shocked that someone would have just dumped him... 

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Jess ~ yeah... It will be cool to hear what you find out with your blood ketone measurements.   :)

 

Did you find a cheap source for strips?  I know Julie posted a link I need to check out when it's time to reorder.  I got 10 strips on Amazon for $35.90 or something like that.  ...That would be why only 3 of them have been used. 

 

I don't think I will ever go back to blowing in my old Ketonix again, which is a shame.  It was a lot of money.

 

Jimmy Moore did a Periscope (?) about ways to get cheaper sticks.  Australian Amazon maybe?  They were 60-70% of the cost from US Amazon.  Just FYI.

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