thegoldengrahamgirl Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Help! I'm in the very important reintroduction phase of my Whole30 and we've been invited over for lasagna at our neighbours. How do I politely not eat the lasagna without being a) rude, a weirdo or c) a social outcast (which I'm normally okay with)? My husband is even exasperated with me. I can bring a compliant side and compliant salad. But I'm not ready to eat gluten (in the noodles) and dairy (in the cheese). I'll take my chances on sugar in the sauce. Honestly, I'd like to just say no to dinner but our son is friends with their son and they have a play date that afternoon. They also want to thank us for cat-sitting over the holidays. (Funny how "thanks" is often in the form of very bad-for-you food!). Moral support and advice appreciated! Thanks, -Lauren (GGG) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Tom Denham Posted January 11, 2016 Moderators Share Posted January 11, 2016 You could explain simply that you have been on a 30-day elimination diet and are not yet at the stage of reintroducing noodles or dairy. You can eat meat, fish, and vegetables... It really is not weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegoldengrahamgirl Posted January 11, 2016 Author Share Posted January 11, 2016 Ah, Tom, the voice of reason. I *know* it's not weird. I have to put on my big girl pants and do some spousal management (he's likely going to be more upset if I politely decline the lasagna than my neighbours will be). He thinks food reactions are "a bunch of hooey" at worst or "over-blown" at best. Besides, I used to eat all this stuff. Says the man with Crohn's/colitis who has DONE zero nutritional management for his painful conditions. Why bother if the doctor will prescribe a daily, life-long medication for it? Sigh. Mini-rant over. Thanks, -Lauren Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators SugarcubeOD Posted January 11, 2016 Moderators Share Posted January 11, 2016 Can you pop over to the neighbors before the gathering and let them know? If you were sensitive to dairy or gluten (which you may be, you just don't know yet), then it wouldn't be noteworthy to not be eating those items. I think during the dinner, just take the serving you're given and eat around the offenders as best as possible, keep a smile on your face and the conversation going and I don't know that anyone is going to notice... and even if they do, it's usually not something someone is going to grill you about in proper company... Your husband sounds difficult and I"m really sorry you're going through that. I don't understand how food reactions can be considered 'hooey' when people can die from them... and obviously, as with anything, there are degrees of 'reaction'... you don't just have 'doesn't die from it' and 'dies from it' as groups of people... hahah... look at me, all ranting along with you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praxisproject Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Help! I'm in the very important reintroduction phase of my Whole30 and we've been invited over for lasagna at our neighbours. How do I politely not eat the lasagna without being a) rude, a weirdo or c) a social outcast (which I'm normally okay with)? My husband is even exasperated with me. I can bring a compliant side and compliant salad. But I'm not ready to eat gluten (in the noodles) and dairy (in the cheese). I'll take my chances on sugar in the sauce. Honestly, I'd like to just say no to dinner but our son is friends with their son and they have a play date that afternoon. They also want to thank us for cat-sitting over the holidays. (Funny how "thanks" is often in the form of very bad-for-you food!). If they've not already baked the lasagna, they might be able to change the menu. If not, just let them know you can't eat gluten or dairy right now but "it smells wonderful" often helps, especially when everyone else is eating it. If pride seems to be involved, I find asking for the recipe goes a long way Take a big salad to share and something compliant for you. People really don't want to make others sick, so be polite but firm For me, that "thank you" could make me sick for three months. My friends have learned to adjust, initially there was resistance, but when they encourage you to eat stuff that makes you sick, eventually they realise it's not like calorie counting, "just a bit" can make someone very sick. My partner has now recognized (me doing the gluten challenge really scared the hell out of him) how sick it makes me and actively reminds me not to eat it "that might have gluten in it" and he doesn't know a calorie from a cucumber. No one tells people with anaphylaxis to "eat just a bit". Because it's stupid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thegoldengrahamgirl Posted January 13, 2016 Author Share Posted January 13, 2016 Good news - the lasagna dinner was fine (these things usually turn out this way, don't they?). I ate the cheese (mild cheddar and/or mozzarella and ricotta) and beef out of one small piece of lasagna, leaving the noodles. No one said a word about the noodles left on my plate. My Caesar salad dressing turned out AWESOME (Foodnetwork.com recipe - I omitted the anchovies), so I focused on that. Our hostess even went back for seconds! (Of course, who doesn't love REAL bacon in a salad?). Thanks for all of the support. Dairy cheese reintro in the books! No rush on yogurt or milk (and I've already done dairy butter). Cheers, -Lauren (GGG) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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