November Whole30...The Saga Continues


CCLaymon

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3 hours ago, IronGirlTrixie said:

I've put the sugar dragon back in its box. Didn't take as long this time but it was a fierce battle.

Big congrats, @IronGirlTrixie! Glad you won the battle! :D

3 hours ago, IronGirlTrixie said:

Brain is also continuing to scream hey clutterclear. Get on this already. But I get home from work tired so I have to find a way to motivate myself to get things done.

I hear you! I have not made any progress in my own decluttering process since I last mentioned it here. Grrr!

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Hello Everyone.  I have not been posting but I am with all of you everyday.  I always read because I am truly interested in how everyone is doing.  I can't address each of you individually - too overwhelming for me - sorry.  Had a few difficult days (grief, depression) but made pretty good choices.  Instead of staying in the apartment, I went to the gym, walked the gardens, visited my mom, attended bereavement support group.  You know the saying that life doesn't give you more than you can handle - well, I don't think that is true -  I have been given more than I can handle.

My love story - where do I start, where do I end - there really is no ending because I will love Steve FOREVER,  Steve and I dated years ago but it did not work out because I wasn't ready to get involved (mostly due to my depression).  We remained friends on and off over the years. I always felt "safe" with him and felt so comfortable letting him know who I was.  During the time we were just friends, his younger brother (only sibling) died of brain cancer. Fast forward, Steve and I reconnected when my depression lifted enough for me to be in a relationship.  Steve and I were soulmates. Steve understood me and knew how to love me.  (Lots of men don't know how to love - I mean this is the emotional sense.) It wasn't long after we were together that Steve was diagnosed with myelofibrosis,  (spelling - have not written that word in a long time) a rare cancer of the bone marrow. Steve was dependent on blood transfusions. To save Steve's life, he needed a stem cell transplant.  He suffered so many side effects of chemo, meds, grafts vs. host disease (acute and chronic) of intestines and skin and later the liver.  GvHD is treated with large doses of prednisone which eventually can cause osteoporosis.  Steve was in tremendous pain all the time.  From one MRI, we know he had degenerative disc disease but the pain in his back was getting worse and his back looked deformed.  Next MRI indicated that he had 9 fractures (out of a possible 12) in his back.  Ct scan showed Steve had a fungal infection in his lungs. Later we find out Steve also has a broken bone in his sternum.  Steve is admitted to University of Miami Hospital, where he had his transplant for pain management.  I spent lots of time sleeping in hospitals with him.  One day, he could not breath and he was transferred to ICU - on top of everything else, he now had double pneumonia.  Doctors were not sure he would survive.  Well, my love did survive and was eventually transferred to a rehab hospital (for occupational and physical therapy very close to our home.)  He was there for several weeks.  Steve was discharged and we were home for less than 18 hours when I had to call an ambulance.  Steve had pneumonia again and was admitted to step down then oncology and finally hospice (I HATE HOSPICE). We got married on Oct. 31, 2015 (not a legal marriage, it was spiritual - an exchange of rings and love - we got married in Steve's hospital bed - because of all his broken bones, it was difficult for him to move). I am not sure if Steve knew he was going to die.  His family signed the paperwork for hospice.  There are lots of other details but too much to write and I don't know who might read this.  Steve and I spend our first night as a married couple in the hospice unit of the hospital.  I knew he was going to die but I did not process anything - except for the fact that he was now my husband and  I loved him more than anyone in the whole word. Hospice was hard -  eventually Steve would skip breaths so I know the end was near.  I feel asleep  in the middle of the night for just one hour and when I woke up he was gone - Nov.6, 2015.   SHL - I love you more and more each day.  You are my hero.  You taught me the meaning of real love and love.  I will forever be yours and you will be mine.

Sorry if this is too much information. There is a part 2 to the story, well probably a part 2 and part 3.  Part 2 would be how I survived losing Steve but I am going to skip that part because to a huge extent I failed at surviving.  Well, that's not true since I am still alive.  Part 3 is my mom - shortly after I lost Steve, my mom was diagnosed with leukemia.  I am too emotional right now so that story will be written another day.

Thanks for reading.

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Still following the w30 - rules but not the recommendations. However, no smoothies or swypo.  Maybe one day, I'll get it completely right and if not, that's okay.  Important to keep striving for improvement but just as important to accept your limitations and be proud of yourself as you get to know what makes you tick during your journey.   Please be grateful for the little things in life - the things most people take for granted.  Tell your loved ones you love them.  Be gentle with yourself and with others.  Think about what really matters in this life.

I know we are all on different days and not sure everyone is following the W30.  Are we going to continue this thread for Feb. or start a new thread and invite new members?  Whatever we do is fine with me.  I plan on staying on the w30 until I find something that is worth it which will be lunch at the Gardens (Morakami Museum - Delray Beach, FL),  The café overlooks the gardens; a beautiful comforting site.  Lunch would have to be early because that place is packed. 

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As I continue to strive for balance, I am learning SO MUCH about my body!  This is both incredibly frustrating and exciting.  I am 41 - I should know this by now.  I can't stop this line of thinking - especially when I screw up.  :(  This is what I am learning: I am typing as my brain is reeling in a smoggy, foggy world of anxiety and clogged-ness.  I was blaming caffeine, and I am sure that is a factor, however, I believe that it is actually the combination of sugar AND caffeine.  (because, seriously, they usually travel hand-in-hand).  I over consumed yesterday and I was paying for it last night and more this morning.  Obviously, the weather is also a factor in my foggy brain.  The biggest problem is the sugar and caffeine, though.  I am finally in a place where I am ready to accept this and make changes.  The cleaner I eat, the more sensitive I am and that is OK - that magnifies the extent of the problem(toxicity) and further encourages change.  FOR ME.  This is MY experience, I know others are having different experiences and I love hearing about how different everyone is!  Thank you all for sharing so much!  I am so in love with this forum and all the support and positivity!:wub:

I have been eating A LOT of salad/lettuce and I love it, but OH is it hard on my tummy!!!  I am calling it a "green cleanse".:D

@Laurie - Please know that we are here for you and we are listening.

@Jessica NG - If I could send strength through the atmosphere I would - hang in there

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Ladies, I am following along here. I'm a little exhausted tonight - the day got away from me. I will pop in for a longer post tomorrow.

@mhemm I have one word for you - NUTPODS!!! That has made my whole30 coffee experience completely manageable :D 

Tomorrow night I am going to a birthday party that is appetizer and booze. Not sure what I'm doing about that so please share your ideas!

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I like to get fizzy water with lime. So it looks like I have a drink but I'm not actually drinking. Tell the waiter/bartender it's your special drink. 

I'd probably time my last meal somewhere before the event so that I'm full and wouldn't be tempted by anything. At least that's what I'm planning for Saturday.  I was unsatisfied by the venue last night so I'm just not buying anything next time. Which is sad because the last several times is been great!

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Finally checking in here, gals. Well, I wasn't sure about this party tonight. It was for a friend's birthday at her house, and she was the only one I knew at the party. I'm a social gal, but not when I don't know anyone. That's just to say I was a little stressed and then I wasn't sure about the food issues.  So I'm at the party and one friend shows up with a veggie tray and fruit tray and announces, "I'm on day 26 of the Whole 30!" And now I have a new friend :)  She invited me to her Whole30 Facebook group with their church. I told her I would pop in and give her the pistachio chicken recipe ;) 

I am far too over scheduled this weekend. I think I better make some hardboiled eggs to take on the road with me tomorrow!

@Laurie asked a good question - what's the plan for February? Are people doing a Whole30? Continuing? Reintros? Do tell!

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I've been lapse in my posting, really been a little down and have totally gone off track!  and boy can I tell it, my body is screaming at me!  My birthday is coming up beginning in February so I'm looking to do a restart of my whole30.  I'm really glad to see that you've all kept up and in touch.  I will continue to keep track and look in the forum.  @CCLaymon I just got another shipment of my nutpods (maybe we should take out stock in them LOL).  Also, ordered Olive Oil from Amazon that in the ingredients it says Extra Virgin Olive Oil,  and guess what?  Even though I ordered it from Amazon it was shipped from Walmart!  Sooooo, I shall look for it in my local Walmart to save on shipping and handling.  Keep up the good work ladies I will be staying with you all but as I said doing a restart more then likely after February 2nd!

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@Laurie thanks for sharing your story, I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'm totally down to keep up with this group in February. I'll be doing reintroduction's then trying to figure what all this looks like for me long term. No immediate plans to do another full Whole30 - since I've discovered eggs is the main source of the digestive issues I've had, I don't see the need to keep going full on Whole30. 

I think long term food freedom looks like limited sugar. Possibly limited grains and legumes depending on what happens during reintro. I do like how my body looks right now, and I really like the idea of continuing to lose weight and maybe looking better than I ever have for my 34th birthday in March. ;)

I'm continuing to crave sugar, but it's all mental, not physical, so I'm just pushing through it. It's continued to be a stressful week - went to see my grandmother in her adult home twice this week. The first time she didn't answer the door, so I left. Second time I ran into her on her way to lunch, 2.5 hours later than she normally goes. She was in a panic saying she fell asleep and forgot to eat. We got to the lunch room and the waitress served her, but told me she was pretty sure she saw her around her normal lunch time. It's been concerning me for a few weeks that she's missing her meal times, and she's started "sleeping" through the day time activities she likes to do. I told my mom - who is her guardian - that we need to get her additional help to make sure she's going to meals and activities and her reply was "well, that's something to think about". My mom is grieving my grandma's dementia, which is most likely in the beginning of the end stages, and I sympathize with her, but she showed symptoms of dementia when I lived with her in 2009-2010 and my mom dismissed it. So it's frustrating for me to watch my mom dragging her feet on what my grandmother needs because she's still trying to accept where my grandmother's at.

Wife and I had a long talk on Wednesday about our next step now that we know she didn't get this promotion. We've known for a while that long term we want to move to Southern California so I can continue to pursue my dream career, this week we decided to make that our top priority and it is our goal to move by the end of this year. So silver lining there for the frustration and disappointment expressed earlier this week.

I'm glad it's day 27, I'm looking forward to relaxing the rules just a bit to make meal planning and grocery shopping a little easier.

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@IronGirlTrixie do tell - what are you creating at home? I'm curious as to what got your attention!

@browneyedbeauty what is your dream career? I apologize if you told us before and I don't remember.

Do you all remember before December when I was supposed to get my headshots taken, and it stressed me out? I finally had them taken this week, and it went pretty smoothly. I got them back today, so I'll debut my favorite one here.  I never know how these will show up so if it's huge I apologize!

 

JR-1657.JPG

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@CCLaymon Cassie, you look wonderful! Way to go, lady! (Loved your story of the lady at the party showing up and announcing she's on day 26 of a Whole30. How perfect!)

@IronGirlTrixie Good for you, coming up with a compliant solution on the fly! That's HARD, and you DID it! Yay!

I'd love it if we could stick together here for February. I'd really miss you ladies, if we disbanded.

I received some good news today. My mom was even more alert this morning AND her kidneys are now working again a little. This is HUGE! I am so grateful.

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@browneyedbeauty Your plans to pursue your dream job sound exciting. I'm with @CCLaymon: what is it? :D Congrats on your victories over your sugar dragon. I still have to do battle with mine from time to time also. The situation with your grandma sounds stressful and worrisome. I hope your mom is able to come to grips with it soon.

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Specifically: TV Showrunner, which is the lead writer and producer for TV shows. Currently I'm developing several TV pilots, short film and feature film ideas. I've been doing work in the entertainment industry for close to ten years, but in the last year I've really honed in on writing/producing as my career pursuit.

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@Jessica NG So glad to hear about your mom! I hope she maintains and continues to improve.

@browneyedbeauty HOW FUN!!  If you're a reader (and if you're a writer, I assume you are) may I recommend "So Good They Can't Ignore You" by Cal Newport. There is a specific story about a fellow who wanted to be a writer for tv shows and how he did. I found the whole book to be very inspiring!

@IronGirlTrixie so interesting! I've never seen anything like that. Do you know about nutritional yeast?  It tastes somewhat like parmesan cheese, and I'm wondering if you could use that?  Curious to hear how your version turns out!

 

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@Jessica NG Yay! So glad youryour mom isis doing better! 

@browneyedbeauty dream job sounds fun and fascinating! Go for it! 

@CCLaymon fantastic picture! I had never thought about that pizza before but it sounded interesting. I have some nutritional yeast but I need to look at closely. I remember there was a post once about it. 

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