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Day 17...Feeling Defeated


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Hi there!

 

Writing to get some feedback on my Whole30 experience. Unfortunately it’s not turning out quite how I had hoped. I know I’m not at the end yet, but my optimism is waning and I’m worried that I’m set up for disappointment at the end of this.

 

My reasons for the Whole30 are multi-fold. For the past 2.5 years I’ve dealt with GI issues. Read: inexplicable nausea. I’m 31 now and have had 2 colonoscopies/endoscopies, endless additional tests, and the only thing that seems to help is 8mg of Zofran every morning. For 2.5 years. On weekends I typically try to minimize the Zofran to 4mg but am nervous to do this throughout the week. My GI also put me on an anti-depressant in hopes of triggering GI improvements. 2.5 years of worrying about nausea and vomiting has taken me from a Type A person to a somewhat anxiety-ridden human who fluctuated with Xanax doses in the evening. I finally got down to 0.25mg before bed every night to get to sleep.

 

During the course of all of the GI testing, they found that I have massively increased inner ear pressure (I was losing my hearing!), and was put on a low sodium diet and a diueretic (the only known successful approaches to preventing additional hearing loss).

 

My GI issues have improved, but every few weeks I have a nasty bout of nausea and back in February I finally said, “I’m sick of this! Even though I tried “elimination diets” over the past 2.5 years, I could never correlate food with my nausea.” Then again, I had never cut out gluten…crackers and toast have always been my go-to food when I’m nauseous.

 

All of this has contributed to weight gain (I’m up about 15lbs from my average weight before all of the GI issues, and honestly…my weight this past summer (July 2016) when my GI issues were beginning to moderate a tad). None of my work pants fit, all of my blazers are tight in the shoulders, and my wedding rings no longer slide off my finger without a lot of effort. I sleep horribly (take forever to fall asleep, and then getting out of bed is a torture I never knew was possible). My knees hurt…possibly from the weight gain. My lower back is ALWAYS killing me. My libido is nonexistent, I have seasonal allergies and headaches, I’m almost always anxious, and always exhausted. In the past couple months I started experiencing a sugar craving I had never had before. I generally always feel crummy, and barely have the energy to workout.

 

It was time for a Whole30.

 

I started on February 20th, despite knowing I would have several “exciting” team dinners (for work) as well as friends’ birthday parties. I was most excited to feel better – get rid of my nausea once and for all and figure out that something I eliminated during the Whole30 was causing me to feel awful and rundown and nauseous. Of course I wanted to jump-start some weight loss to fit back into all of my regular clothes. Most of all, I wanted to experience the soaring energy everyone refers to. My husband (and best friend of 17 years!) is incredibly active and sometimes I feel like I’m dragging him down with what has become my “weak constitution!” He, of course, handles my limitations with grace and love, but I want to have the energy I used to have. I want to feel decent enough to plan and go on trips. I wanted to figure out what my food freedom looks like – maybe at 31 my metabolism is finally slowing down and I really do need to cut most of the grains from my diet to both maintain the weight/body composition I’d like, and to feel better (get that energy back! Be able to get to the gym!).

 

I’m now on Day 17 and am becoming less and less optimistic by the minute. My rings are still as tight as ever. I’ve experienced no change in how my pants fit (and therefore I still hate walking into my closet every morning). When I look in the mirror every day after the shower, I can’t see any differences (I do have before photos, but in the past 24 hours have thought to myself, “I don’t even have a desire to take “after” photos/measurements/weight.”. For a few days it felt like maybe my face was starting to thin out, but that seems to have disappeared. I’m still exhausted all the time (and can’t fall asleep). I still don’t have energy for the gym. My anxiety has been all over the place (part of me is willing to ‘accept’ this for now, since I’m sure there are plenty of hormonal changes going on). I’m frustrated and while there is no question in my mind that I will absolutely complete the Whole30 as planned, I’m just becoming terribly disenchanted and frustrated.

 

To give you an idea of my eating:

 

·         Breakfast, M-F, includes a piece of quiche made on Sundays and shared with my husband throughout the week. We bake in a 9x13. 12-14 eggs, onions, kale, spinach, and Aidell’s chicken apple sausage. Handful of berries on mornings that I’m still hungry afterwards. After my first week, when I found I was extremely hungry still, I started adding a small serving of roasted diced sweet potatoes and topping everything with the homemade chimichurri I make on Sundays. On weekend mornings I made a 3-egg omelette with spinach and cherry tomatoes, and eat 1-2 slices of Wellshire whole30 compliant bacon.

·         When I get to work (or on weekends), cup of coffee with some Vanilla nutpods, but more frequently than not a cup (8-10oz) of tea (2 Lipton’s black tea, or Earl Grey)

·         If breakfast doesn’t tide me over to lunch, I’ll have a green apple and 10-12 almonds (I don’t love nuts, but know I should at least be having some fat with the apple. Protein at that time of day just isn’t feasible given the nature of my job and how much I’m running around helping my team throughout the day)

·         Lunch is either a green salad (combo of baby spinach & power greens, shredded carrots, red & green bell pepper, cherry tomatoes grilled chicken, topped with sliced almonds and an individual wholly guacamole (shake up the salad with the guac and then olive oil & balsamic) or leftovers (whole30 compliant chili that I froze at the beginning of this). It’s salads about 5-6 days a week, with the chili helping to mix things up when I get sick of it. On the weekends I may have some whole30 compliant turkey breast from Costco with whole30 compliant mustard and baby spinach (roll them up), along with a wholly guacamole and possibly an orange if still hungry.

·         I haven’t had the energy to workout still, so only on days where I’m famished, my “afternoon snack” is either some rolled up lunch meat, or a Pecan Pie larabar.

·         We’ve tried to switch it up a bit with dinner, but meals have honestly centered around:

o   Flank steak marinaded in olive oil, balsamic, oregano, and garlic; roasted asparagus or brussels sprouts or broccoli & carrots; roasted diced sweet potatoes or cauli-parsnip mash; with homemade chimichurri

o   Chicken “stir-fry” – Plain sautéed diced chicken with sautéed bell peppers and onions, on top of cauli rice, topped with Tessamae’s Lemon Chesapeake

o   Salmon with balsamic/olive oil/garlic (roasted), sweet diced potatoes, and asparagus/broccoli/brussels sprouts

o   Half Baked Harvest’s Singapore Sweet Potato Noodles (all whole30 options) topped with shrimp

o   Zoodles or spaghetti squash with homemade, whole30 compliant meat sauce (ground beef, whole30 compliant sauce, and spices (garlic, Italian spices, hot pepper flakes). On these nights I’ll have a small side salad with spinach, shredded carrots, bell peppers, some sliced almonds, pepper, and olive oil/balsamic

·         On nights where I’m extremely hungry after dinner and tea doesn’t help (or drinking water and waiting 20 minutes), I’ll have an orange and/or ½ to a whole pecan pie larabar

 

Perhaps I’m eating too much sweet potato? Honestly, though, on days at the beginning when I tried to abstain, I was SO HUNGRY still. I think I need some of those carbs to help fill me up. I’m also pretty picky when it comes to veggies, so trying to find things that I enjoy isn’t that easy. I’m probably forgetting some key details, but would really appreciate some help and guidance. I’d obviously like to work on, if not some weight loss, at least changing my body composition, getting my wedding rings to loosen up, and most of all, experiencing more energy! What do I do to make sure days 18-30 feel rewarding!?

 

 

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Your breakfasts and dinners seem to be missing fats.  If you add more fat into your meals you may not have to snack any longer.  And if you do snack it really shouldn't be fruit or a Larabar, but more protein/veg/fat.  

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I agree with ltj - no more larabars.  

The moderators will tell you to list your portions on this thread.  Without portions we don't know if you are eating enough.  

If you are eating the correct portions you should not be "extremely hungry" after dinner.  When you feel like you are hungry after dinner, you need to really examine the feeling.  You may not really be hungry.  You may be bored, anxious, sad, frustrated, etc.  Why do you feel you need to eat something sweet (the orange or larabar)?  Are you tired?  Are you stressed?  Are you procrastinating on the dishes, or maybe a walk?  Start a journal or write down your thoughts on the forum. 

I'm certainly not an expert; I'm only on Day 8.  But I took the whole30 advice to examine my "hunger" or "craving" to determine what it really is.  I still get that "hunger" or "craving" between meals, but most of the time I can recognize that I'm bored, or I just had tough conversation with a customer or family member.  

Let us know what happens when you sit with that feeling instead of feeding it. 

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I know how you feel. I am on Day 31. I almost quit on Day 22 because during this time I've discovered an intolerance to eggs that I never had before. They make me so sick and at one point I was curled up on my floor in tears, telling my husband it wasn't worth it. My skin isn't all glowy and shiny like I've heard about, I'm still exhausted, I still don't like cooking, and I miss bread. BUT I am really glad I stuck with it. I did it knowing that I may not lose any weight but here at the end, I actually started to. I am going to do a sloooow reintroduction because I do believe I have some other food intolerances that are going to present themselves. My view is that these first 30 days have been a kickstart to getting my body healthy--not the end all, be all/magic solution. I feel like a still have a long road ahead of me but I figure if I just made it through these 30 days which included 2 birthday parties with cake and ice cream, 2 free lunches and a free breakfast served up at work, a baby shower cake, several King cakes, and open jars of candy everywhere I turn, I can keep going. 

I've been dealing with exhaustion for almost a decade and I'm determined to find an answer to getting my energy back. We both have chronic problems that will need long term solutions and they won't be fixed in 30 days.

YOU CAN DO THIS! It can be frustrating and stressful and you may not lose weight, but you'll be so glad you took this first step in getting healthy. Just stay connected with other ladies doing it as well. Their encouragement really helped me. 

Also, you can switch it up and eat some hamburger patties. We grilled ours and then wrapped them in lettuce with tomatoes and bacon. I found compliant bacon at Costco and one of my favorite meals is baked chicken served with a baked potato w/ghee and bacon. I'm also super picky so I've been eating a ton of petite green beans (again, from Costco). 

Remember, just keep swimming!

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Okay, you're probably not eating enough if you're 'extremely hungry' and 'SO HUNGRY'.

Eggs when they are your sole source of protein are as many as you can hold in one hand without dropping. For most people that's 3-4 to start.  If you used 14 eggs in your quiche and cut it into ten pieces, that's 1.4 eggs per serving... not enough by a long shot... also, if you're not putting that piece of quiche on a plate and SURROUNDING it with veggies and a healthy dollop of fat on top (or a couple heaping handfuls of olives or 1/2 to a whole avocado) it is absolutely not shocking that you're starving.

Until you get your meals straightened out, if you need to eat between meals, do it with protein and fat... nuts are recommended to be limited (think a closed handful [8 whole almonds or so] every other day at most)... and fruit is just going to bump your blood sugar... fruit is recommended to be only eaten with meals, not stand alone as snacks for this reason.

When your lunch is salads, are they huge?  Salad greens are almost nothing when chewed down.  When you  make the turkey meat rollups, are you adding more veggies?  Spinach in the amount that can fit into the roll up is not enough... 

Leave the larabars alone... they are only approved for emergencies and being hungry because your meals are not quite enough is not an emergency.

It's hard to tell how much you you eat at these meals but have you seen the template?  It's linked in my signature below... usually when people are becoming frustrated like you are, it's because their meals are lacking.

Please also know that you are coming from a clearly longstanding health issue... it didn't get this way in 17 days and it's not going to resolve in 17 days (if at all).  I hope for you that you get your meals dialed in and that you have some non scale victories, but please know this isn't a miracle cure all diet... some things don't resolve or can take much longer than 30 days to resolve... 

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Hoo-boy.

First the food. It's hard to tell how much you're actually eating. The only part that had an indicator of quantity was the "3-egg omelette". You do seem to be missing added fat at most meals though which would contribute to your hunger. If you want to list actual foods consumed with quantities as they relate to the meal template, we can review further. Or just try and get your meals to match. Template linked in my signature below.

Now...........the more important part. And I'm sorry. But 17 days is not going to change your ongoing medical issues which are causing your ongoing side effects/symptoms. It's really not. For one thing this is a 30 day program and you are barely half way. For another, we often express to people with underlying health conditions that it is very possible that they could need well over 30 days on the program before they start to notice a change and/or come to a place where they feel "better" enough to start reintroducing and doing some personal investigative work.

That all said, there is nothing wrong with eating protein, veggies and fats every day, 3 times a day. The fact that you have these unknown underlying health conditions means that your body is going to have some healing of some kind to do. Maybe it's not working and nothing is changing. Or maybe..........at a cellular level, your body is working on healing, assinging nutrients where they need to go and making small changes. Maybe it's not enough for you to see yet. But if you were miserable before, what would be the use of going off the plan/back to that? 

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Hi all,

 

Thanks so much for the responses – this is the first time I’ve availed myself of the community, and it’s been enlightening and heartening!

 

To address some of the comments – I hear you! No more larabars unless I’m unexpectedly out and can’t get to real food J I’ve done a really good job of planning thus far, but am hoping that by incorporating some of the other advice, I won’t need to reach for that afternoon larabar or orange. They really are about hunger for me – my stomach is growling after a glass of water and/or tea (to see if I’m actually hungry rather than just craving something), and it’s about my body needing additional food. That said, with all of the advice about incorporating fats, I really am hoping that that will help me cut the need for additional food between meals.

 

A few questions on the best way to redesign my meals – this has already been extremely helpful, so I hope it’s okay that I continue to ask for help and guidance! For breakfast, I think I’ll up my quiche intake. I’m adding quite a bit of sweet potatoes (drizzled with olive oil and seasoned with garlic powder and cayenne. So, some fat) to the mix. Do the spinach, kale and onions in the quiche not count towards the “heaping vegetables” goal? When I’ve researched breakfast options, people seem to mostly do something along these lines, so I thought I was okay. For the “dollop of fat,” how about it I alternate topping it with avocado one day and then a nut butter (is almond butter acceptable? I haven’t been able to find a clear answer on this…) on other days? I think I’ve struggled with the fat because I can’t figure out exactly how to incorporate. I despise olives, so those are out. So how exactly am I supposed to incorporate the other options?!

 

For snacks, here’s to hoping more fat and protein in my meals makes my need for snacks disappear!

 

In terms of lunch, the salads are in fact HUGE. Bigger than any salads I’ve ever eaten. Bigger as in I’m struggling to finish them bigger! Granted, I am a slow eater – always have been. So I definitely take closer to 20-30 minutes to finish the salads, which allows for me to digest. But I’ve found that that helps me achieve satiety without stuffing myself.  I also focus on including more of the peppers, carrots, sugar snap peas, tomatoes. Do the olive oil part of my olive oil/balsamic as dressing, and the wholly guacamole, and the sliced almonds (probably 2 tablespoons) fulfill the fat needs? If not, what else should I add in? Lastly, with the turkey roll-ups, what if I do a side with diced veggies (peppers, sugar snap peas, carrots) to get more veggies in with the meal? And maybe I’ll add diced avocado to the roll-ups.

 

For dinners, I’m either using olive oil or avocado oil to cook with. The meal template, and all of the moderators who respond to folks saying that nuts and seeds are never the preference, make me feel like all I’m left with in terms of adding more fats, are olives, which I just can’t bring myself to eat due to the taste, or coconut. To be perfectly honest, I haven’t been able to figure out how to incorporate coconut into my meals. By virtue of my job and other commitments, I spent a few hours on Sunday prepping breakfast, lunch and dinner to make sure that I have no more than about 10-15 min of additional prep the day of to eat my meals (eat quiche throughout the week; prep my salads in Tupperware, and have dinner basically ready to just be heated up Monday-Wednesday). Thursday dinners are usually more of a free-for-all (another salad? A serving of whole30 chili thawed from the freezer?). Friday dinners are similar – those are big zoodle & sauce with side salad nights. How do I incorporate fat with my dinner options? I’m really at a loss (and had clearly  misunderstood the whole concept of the fat portion of the meal template) and would benefit greatly from more specific advice!

 

I think that addresses most of the questions I’m able to come up with right now! I do want all of you wonderfully helpful people to know that I’m absolutely committed to fully completing the Whole30 (!), and am committed to maintaining these meal choices as a lifestyle choice. I think I’m seeing my cravings (which although relatively new were startling to me and I want to nip those in the bud!) change, and so my thought has been, “If this helps me feel better…then why would I want to eat that stuff that might be the reason I felt badly!? And even if they weren’t the cause, they’re absolutely HEALTHIER choices, and reading all of the whole30 literature has taught me that…so why would I ignore it!?” I think as long as I don’t see any causation between whole30 compliant foods and my bouts of nausea, there’s no reason I won’t continue this, in hopes that it’s helping to slowly heal my body. I do need to figure out when I can try reintroduction, though, because I really would like to see if I can identify any sensitivities.

 

I think most importantly, your responses were a really helpful reminder that even though I’ve sortttt of started to feel a little better in the last 6 months or so, that doesn’t mean that I’m “back to normal.” Re-reading my description of the past 2.5 years, it hit me that these aren’t insignificant health challenges, and my body likely needs more time with healthier choices to truly start to heal.

 

I really do appreciate all of the advice and guidance. It’s amazing to see how this community works. I’m going to sit down tonight and do some more research, and look forward to your additional thoughts!

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Regarding the nausea - I know that you've mentioned some ear issues...have they checked you for vertigo? My middle and inner ears are pretty trashed and I'm almost completely deaf (lost most of it at 24. Wheee!). When my ears are behaving, I'm fine apart from some slight balance issues, but if the pressure in my middle ear is off just a little bit (allergies or starting a cold) I'm just vaguely dizzy/nauseous. 

Otherwise, just stick with it. You're over halfway through the 30 days and it might take longer to see real improvements after so long with GI issues. You can do it. 

Have you tried making your own mayo/mayo-based sauces? I can't do olives either, so when I couldn't get good avocados, I would have mayo as my fat source, or make it into ranch or some other sauce. 

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13 hours ago, CDip5 said:

most importantly, your responses were a really helpful reminder that even though I’ve sortttt of started to feel a little better in the last 6 months or so, that doesn’t mean that I’m “back to normal.” Re-reading my description of the past 2.5 years, it hit me that these aren’t insignificant health challenges, and my body likely needs more time with healthier choices to truly start to heal.

I'm just on the run out the door but wanted to let you know how glad I was to read this. It hasn't been insignificant and sometimes it does help to write/say it all for others so that they can reflect back to you what you might have forgotten. In your case that this may be a hike up a mountain rather than a walk in the park. :)

And yes, almond butter is approved if all the ingredients are compliant. That said it's not your best fat choice as nuts and their products have some challenges of their own. They are disruptive digestively, far too easy to overeat and are high in Omega 6. Have you tried making homemade mayo? Drizzle ghee?

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