Binge eating and re-starting Whole30

[littleg]

I've been thinking about you nearing day @Dragonslayer... keep it up.  It is going to get easier once you get over this hump!  Your goals for 2018 sound great and clearly you've given them a lot of thought!  You too @hmg1993!  I guess not too surprisingly I've got a pretty similar list - none of the usual lose 10 lbs stuff for me either  

Can't wait to hear more about your book @Dragonslayer - how cool!  

@hmg1993 Thank goodness for Amazon - I was able to find my IP order: Instant Pot IP-DUO60 7-in-1 Programmable Pressure Cooker with Stainless Steel Cooking Pot and Exterior, 6-Quart/1000-watt, Latest 3rd Generation Techn.  I paid 137 - I think they are cheaper now.  I used to make yogurt in it a lot when I was doing SCD for some really bad IBS.  I might get into it again when Robby is older so it is a nice feature to have.  

One of my goals for 2018 is to spend a little more time unplugged... I'd definitely get rid of Facebook before you guys though   I'm hoping once we are in the new house (which is much more rural) that I'll be spending more time outside each day and less time sucked into the wormhole of the inter webs.  We both are really hoping that once we move (and have land, access to trails, a big (heated!) garage with a woodworking space and a gym space that we are both going to be a bit less sluggish.  I've got some big woodworking goals!  So far I've learned to plane boards for the floor/door trim in new house but hopefully my learning won't end there  Robby's got a little sled and some Alaskan-friend recommended outdoor gear so hopefully we'll spend more time outside too.  Now he just crawls into the street every time I put him down outside... Anyway, I've got some high hopes for 2018.  2017 was obviously a blessing with our little guy but the prolapse and loss of my own physical sense of self has been really hard, I'm hoping that 2018 allows me ways to find safe ways to build movement back into my life a la Katy Bowman (if you guys haven't read her stuff, I highly suggest it!).  

In other news - hubs has his breakfast casserole for this coming week ready to go!  He is saying he is actually excited to start this W30 and finish it - I hope so.  

@SugarcubeOD Thanks for popping in - always nice to hear from you!  Happy New Year!

Happy, Healthy New Year ladies  Thanks for being a part of my (virtual) life!

 

[hmg1993]

Thanks @littleg for the scoop on the instant pot.  Love your and @Dragonslayer's resolutions too.  I am adding in be kinder to others and try not to use negative words.  I know it sounds pollyanna but I work a very high stress job and it's easy to get into the habit of blowing off steam with lots of rhetoric and moaning.  Instead I am going to be thankful for what I have and try to set a better example.  And I will also try to practice random acts of kindness.  A better habit to cultivate methinks than constantly thinking about myself!

 

@Dragonslayer more info on the book PLEASE and @littleg in awe of the woodworking skills.  I think it's so rewarding to be able to create something.  I used to love to knit but have a nasty habit of starting things and then not finishing them.  Time to remedy that.

 

So far this trip has been really cathartic from a binging standpoint.  Haven't felt one urge, no doubt fueled by the zero stress environment.  I am going to try very hard not to fall back into bad habits on reentry as my usual return from a trip act is to stuff my face the minute I am home.  Not this time.

Happy new year.  Thankful for your company and support.  I will try to get back into the recipe groove when I am back.  I did make the wilted greens last night and they were amazing.  Also roasted a pork loin -- 2.5 lbs, rubbed with a paste made with tablespoon of olive oil and handful each of fresh thyme and rosemary plus salt.  Roasted in 375 oven for 1 hour and rested for 15 minutes before slicing.  Really good and first time I had used loin as opposed to "easier" tenderloin. 

[Guest]

@hmg1993 I got the Instant Pot (that’s the brand) Lux60 V3 6 quart 6 in 1 version. No yogurt maker but it was $80 vs $119 for the 7 in 1 so I just went cheaper. 

Everything ive been quoting or talking about lately is all from the same habit book I’m still reading. “7 habits of highly effective people”. I love it. It’s meant to take each habit one by one and work on one until you are ready to build on it and introduce the 2nd, etc. I’m going to read the whole book first, and then do as reccomended. Right now the beginning stages are simply determining the habits you want to change, figuring out the behaviors/feelings associated with them, and then making a conscious effort to take responsibility for your actions, determine the values you want to live by instead, and be proactive instead of blaming it on something else. So instead of saying “I binged because I’m addicted to sugar and couldn’t control myself”, I should say “I made the choice to binge even though deep down I want to make healthier choices. I binged because I chose to respond to my urge and was not proactive in trying to respond in a different way.” It’s all about taking ownership of your choices and realizing that nothing is out of your control. You are Response-Able, and practicing that over and over is the key to the first step. 

[littleg]

@Dragonslayer

 I guess I have another book to get from the library!  I really like the language you used above!   

[Guest]

Day 11! Yesterday was so hard. My cravings just wont end. I told my fiancé though last night eventually, which helped me stop munching, but it was another bingey (Whole30) night. The one thing I’m stopping today is going to the store after work. I’ve started already thinking about what I will buy right before work ends and it’s turning into this horrible pattern this week. The foods are technically Whole30 but still super snacky and not following the “meal” rule at all. Today my small goal is to NOT do this for just today. Eat 3 meals only. Totally Whole30 style. And I’m stuck in the dispatch office at a computer all day so hopefully the starvation won’t hit bc I won’t be very active. Part of me thinks that just getting past day 10 is a huge mental struggle, so I’m hoping it naturally becomes easier from today on and that my stress reduces. I think i was causing more stress and anxiety bc of the day number, which is silly, but I feel more relaxed today knowing I got through it.

Tomorrow is my Friday and then I leave to go home and care for my mom for a week. It will be a very tough/sad/stressful time, but I’m happy I will be able to be there for my dad to help and I know it’s the best thing to do right now. She’s basically living in the hospital at this point. My down time will be spent journaling, reading, writing, and spending quality time with my dad. He’s struggling emotionally so I’m hoping I can give him a bit of a mental break to relax. I also think the change of scenery will help me a lot to get out of this munching pattern. I won’t have a car so I won’t be able to go binge shopping, and I’ll be around my family non stop so that will help my behavior. My dad never snacks and eats 3 square meals, so I’m going to try and follow his schedule. There is a gym in his condo complex so I can stay active, and I’m hoping to cook and freeze a ton of healthy whole30ish food for them during the week. My mom hasn’t been following a healthy diet at all bc she feels nauseous and craves the worst foods, so I’m hoping to make some delicious recipes that she will enjoy. 

[Guest]

Day 12! Although the numbers were definitely causing me more stress mentally for the past few days, now, I believe they are actually helping me mentally. Yesterday and then again this morning I have this huge sense of relief and confidence, just knowing the first ten days are over. I haven’t made it to day 12 in a while, and it feels great. Whether or not it’s true, I feel like the worst is behind me, and I am so looking forward to this coming week. Being with family, change of scenery, new challenges but also easier in some aspects, and just some down time to reflect on my life, what’s important, my values, and find “my center.” Finding your center was the chapter i read last night and it was very eye opening. All about where “you live” (figurately) right now and how to change it to be more principle based instead. Example: I discovered that I float between relationship, pleasure, and self centered. (There are 6 or 7 main centers: family, relationship/spouse, Work, pleasure, church, object/possessions, self, etc) But instead of living in these emotion based centers, we should try and determine what our basic personal life principles are and live in a principle based center instead. This helps you stand apart from the emotions you encounter and evaluate your options/decisions based on your principles that remain constant your whole life. It gives you a secure base to work from so you can slowly become more proactive than reactive. (Makes a lot more sense the way the book describes but very eye opening.) 

So as the book reccomends, I will spend my next week working on writing my personal mission statement, determining the values that mean most to me, and finding what my center is now and creating a principle based center to work towards instead. 

Hope everyone has a great day. It’s breakfast stir fry for breakfast and then breakfast salad for lunch because all we have is breakfast sausage eggs avocado cauliflower rice and some veggies. Tonight is date night out to spend some quality time together bc this trip will be the longest my fiancé and I have ever been apart in all of our 8 years together! Is that weird?! 

[littleg]

Have a great date night!  Just think about how happy you guys will be 9 days from now!  

PS - I ate nothing but breakfast sausage for lunch too :/  Well, so far, I may need a snack later 

[hmg1993]

@Dragonslayer  Yay on reaching Day 12 and the confidence that comes with it.  You are also totally inspiring me to dig into the seven habits.  I love the idea of a personal mission statement.   I spend so much time and energies doing that for work and totally neglect me.  So a very good exercise -- particularly for the long plane rides ahead back to the very frozen north.  Not looking forward to that temperature differential.

 

I don't think it's weird at all on the eight years. We're celebrating 25 years (child bride!) next week and spend very little time apart.  It's all good.

 

 

[littleg]

@hmg1993 I hope you are home in front of a fire with a nice glass of wine and not stuck in some horrible snowpocalypse situation!  

[hmg1993]

Thanks @littleg! Still in Hawaii but heading back tomorrow and hoping to be home Saturday morning ET ... weather permitting! 

Hope you’re warm and safe and that @Dragonslayer made it to her parents.

[Guest]

@hmg1993 safe travels! Sounds like some crazy weather happening!  I’m on the east now too but down in Atlanta. Very cold but blue skies. @littleg are you getting hit too? 

Im back with my parents in the hospital in Atlanta. We finally found the source of a lot of her recent illness and she’s doing much better now. Very nice to come home to better news. I guess I’m good luck!  

feeling clear headed but sitting here as she sleeps and felt I needed to come post because I was getting some nervous feelings. I had the most disgusting cafeteria salad that could ever exist for dinner, and was left very unsatisfied. Nothing else compliant around but I wasn’t that hungry. The room is filled with food from friends and family and I have to sleep on the couch right next to it. Kettle corn, cookies, muffins, and a chocolate covered tray of everything. I know I won’t eat it but I think I’m getting nervous just hoping I don’t get some random urge all the sudden. The worrying though made me realize that I’m just causing worse anxiety and that in itself is going to make the urges worse. Deep down I know I don’t want the food so I just need to be more confident in myself and keep telling myself that it’s not even an option anymore and that I am strong enough to not consider it. It’s all about the mindset and being sure of myself and my actions. “I am a healthy person and I don’t binge on those foods anymore.” Trying to think of it past tense helps me sometimes. And I just decided to throw away a few of the things I’m sure no one will even notice or care, and then put the rest in a bag next to my moms bed away from my sight to help. 

Anyways, just needed an accountability update. @hmg1993 what day are you on?! It’s gotta be like 50! And you too @littleg? A week? 

[hmg1993]

That’s great news @Dragonslayer about your mom. And you are so strong. You’re past the ten day mark and on a roll. Ignore the food. None of it will make you feel good.

As for me. Stopped counting but ... I definitely did 45 or so completely and then I did have a delicious glass of wine on my birthday and also a Tito’s on the plane (hate to fly and was super bumpy). I enjoyed both, didn’t feel guilty and also didn’t immediately want to have more or snarf down everything in sight, which is my usual mindset - the “I’m not perfect therefore I will ruin everything” playbook.  I’m sure lack of stress is helping my mindset and behaviors but I am going to try very hard to keep the roll going back at home. That means 80-90 percent W30 with the very occasional exception for a glass of wine or a special dinner where not all ingredients will be compliant. What I know for sure is that I feel so much better mentally and physically eating this way. And not counting calories is also a huge step forward thanks to you! And annually I will try to do a proper W30

[littleg]

@Dragonslayer Glad to hear the good news about your mom!  Are you from Atlanta?  Are you staying at home or in a hotel?  I wish people would realize that kettle corn isn't really the best thing for people with struggling health.  I wish hospitals would realize the same... hospital food is the WORST.  Take care of her and yourself while you are down there.  Oh, and the whole past tense thing - brilliant!  What a great idea.  

@hmg1993 Safe travels tomorrow - the worst of the storm should be gone so hopefully you won't have insane flight delays again!  Great job with those 45 days!  Good luck with your 80-90% goals too - I'm sure these last 6 weeks are going to give you a great foundation for W30 + wine   

I'm on day 7 here.  All good  This will be the W30 without a refrigerator... 2000$ fridge 13 months old and it friggin' broke.  I totally thought I was a sucker for getting the warranty but I'm hoping it may have been a good move.  Supposedly they reimburse you for food... we'll see how hard they make it to do so.  

Gotta go make some breakfast!  

PS - tomorrow is little guy's birthday.  Days go slow, years go fast.  So true.  

[Guest]

@littleg aww happy birthday tiny g! Time does fly when they are growing up I bet. Hope he has a great birthday! Bummer about the fridge, ours broke last winter and I thought I was going to have a mental breakdown Haha. Just the thought of all the wasted food killed me. But hopefully you get a new one soon! That certainly makes whole30 harder, but you got it! 

@hmg1993 sounds like you are in such a great place mentally and really finding your food freedom! So jealous, but inspired to keep going so I can be at that point hopefully soon in the future! 

Man, the difference between hospital food in Denver vs Atlanta is like a steak restaurant vs McDonald’s. But this food is actually worse than McDonald’s. It appears I’ll be living off hard boiled eggs for a few meals because everything else is extremely NOT compliant and I honestly don’t think I would want it even if I was in a binge state! That’s saying ALOT. It’s also upsetting to see what they feed my mom. It’s making me so aware of my choices and I’m trying to help her make some better ones too. I’m gonna hopefully make it to a store today to stalk up on some goods for both of us. It’s torture letting her eat this stuff. Look at the ingredients in this crap! You may not be able to see but basically it’s sugar, refined oils, and a whole bunch of fake nutrients. Total bummer to see this in a hospital. But at least she’s getting better so I’m trying not to focus on her food until we are out and at home. Anyways, still going strong. So tired from no sleep but I know I can handle it. 

 

[hmg1993]

@littleg  Happy birthday to little little G!  Capricorns rule.  Obviously!  I am so sorry about your fridge.  It's not a Samsung is it?  I think that's the brand we bought.  All fancy, french doors, blah blah.  Broke within about 2 months!  Congratulations on Day 7.  You're rocking it!!

@Dragonslayer  That's so bad that there aren't better options in a hospital.  Our health system has to get a grip.  I think in Boston it's better because they're on the nutrition bandwagon but even so trays are often laden with things like jello or pudding.  And don't get me started on artificial sweeteners -- so bad.  I love the Michael Pollan rule that you shouldn't eat anything that has more than five ingredients or something you can't pronounce or recognize.  

Does anyone have difficulty sleeping?  I am the worst, even on vacation although it's less of an issue because I don't have to get up and function.  I take magnesium (although not Natural calm) and occasional melatonin.  I am trying as of a new year's resolution to ditch the kindle, iPad or computer before bed and go back to reading "real" books.  and I am also trying to convince my husband to get rid of the TV in the bedroom although not winning that argument yet!  Ideas?

 

Setting out in a few hours after one last glorious hike through the hills behind our house.  And then back to reality!

[Guest]

@hmg1993 I have always battled with sleeping issues. I too take magnesium and sometimes melatonin, but after my first 20 days of Whole30, I slept like a baby. Also I think the biggest game changer for me was taking the tv out of the bedroom. I made my fiancé “try it” (knowing I would never let it back in) and after about a week my sleep patterns completely changed. You should definitely try it. I swear it’s the main reason I’m doing better these days. Also putting my phone and any lights away from the bed and no screens an hour before sleep. That one doesn’t always happen but I try. 

I too love the Michael pollan rule. And very silly but I even used to try to follow that rule when bingeing. That went out the door for the past few months, but very conscious of it again now that I’m back on Whole30. 

My dad let me take a break and get out for a bit today which was amazing. I went WILD at Whole Foods (in a good way) and was so happy to bring back some good food for us all. I feel more comforted now knowing I have some options and although I’m not going to treat them as snacks, I did buy a few snacky type foods only for “emergency” throughout my stay this week. Also got to work out, shower, and run some other errands. Feeling good and my mom might be discharged tomorrow so things are so much better all around! 

[littleg]

@Dragonslayer Ugh.  Hospital food.  Soooo bad.  Here diabetic - why don't you have some pancakes and fruit cup and fat free fake egg for breakfast.  Since it is a diabetic menu you'll get sugar free syrup made with some really healthy artificial sweeteners!  But, healthcare wouldn't make money if chronic diseases were cured - so we "manage" them (read: perpetuate them).  Will your mom eat food you bring her?  I'm assuming that is some sort of shake like thing since she isn't eating much...?  Even some Hagen Daz would be better for her than that!  Glad to hear you are feeling a little more human after some self care - don't forget to take care of yourself through all of this too.  Hope you guys are all home soon!

@hmg1993 It was a Kenmore Elite (LG rebranded for Sears).  I've heard nothing but bad things about Samsung - which was why we didn't buy one.  Guess it doesn't matter what you get these days.  

I used to sleep well, after my mom passed away I stopped sleeping (I was having weird panic attacks at night).  Then I got preggers.  Then baby g showed up and I haven't slept in 2 years  I'm actually seeing an acupuncturist and doing some Chinese Herbal medicines to try to help it (that and Magnesium).  I've been trying to be better about screens in the evenings too.  I do watch TV in our room sometimes though (we actually got a TV in the room after my sleep troubles started because I was "hamster wheeling" so much that falling asleep to TV seemed to help).  I'm hoping that what @Dragonslayer noticed happens to me!  Interestingly, when my husband does W30 within a few days he is falling asleep at 8 and sleeping for 10 hours!  I wish that were me!  I also have started using essential oils.  I got suckered into a DoTerra party (that I really thought was a mom group thing - not a buy-EO-party ) and got a bunch.  One blend they market to help sleep/relax is called "Serenity" and I do notice that it seems to help.  I don't always remember to put it on but I do sleep better the nights I do, still not sure if it is actual causation though.  

Well baby g seems pretty ambivalent about his birthday so far  He did moo like a cow for the first time today  I'll pass along the birthday wishes!

So yesterday was really tough for me mentally.  I have so much to be thankful for at this 1 year mark but at the same time it is also really hard realizing it has been one year that I have had so many physical problems since his birth.  I was feeling really deflated and pessimistic yesterday about ever being able to do the things I like again.  And... get this - I LOST my appetite.  I was almost ready to go to bed without dinner but did get a little hungry after about an hour of crying and ate a little.  But, to not binge through yesterday's feelings.  Big win for me.  Onto day 9.  Feels easy this time.  No complaints.  Hubs going well on day 5 too.  He said he was really craving a meatball sub yesterday and the only reason he didn't do it was for baby g.  He knows that his weight is not really just a benign thing and he wants to be here and be healthy for the kiddo .  So win for him too.  I hope he makes it past the infamous 10 day mark!

 

[Guest]

@littleg I had a similar upsetting experience on New Years. (Not fair to compare to your experience bc I haven’t had similar issues, but just to relate a little...) I looked back at my whole year of journaling all the way back to my last years resolutions where I basically had the same revelation and said “this is really the time” and all that same stuff. Now a year later here I am still struggling and even relapsing. BUT I hadn’t started Whole 30 yet and didn’t have a clear plan or path to follow that would help me with goal setting. But it was frustrating seeing how little progress I felt like I’ve made. But what you and I should do is look at the mental progress instead of the physical. I’m sure you are way stronger in many aspects of your life. And I’m sure you have learned a great deal about yourself and made big strides in figuring out the things you want/need to work on. It’s totally normal to spend these first years Totally dedicating yourself to your child and not helping yourself. That’s not a bad thing. But maybe now that it’s been a year and you are able to reflect and see that you want to change some things, you can start giving yourself a little more self love and focus. Don’t get down on yourself. A year in perspective isn’t that long. Quick fixes don’t last. It’s the slow long term changes that really stick, so just look at it as slow small changes and now you can build on this past year and set some more goals for doing “you things” this year. I’ve never been a mom but I really feel like after the first year or so, being a little selfish and focusing back on you is totally normal and necessary. I think some of my Mom friends think that doing things they want and not putting the child first all the time is the way to be the best mom, but I believe that if you aren’t focusing on bettering yourself and getting back into those things you like, you won’t be able to be the best person you can be as an example for your son. You want him to see you happy and active and doing things you love so he can follow in your footsteps and learn to be independent, find things he loves, and grow into a strong and driven person just like you! So be selfish for a while and make some goals and plans for YOU. My friend had similar feelings and finally tried a few things like daycare/babysitting/activities for the baby so she was able to have some time for herself more and it made a huge difference. Lose those guilty feelings and give yourself some love. You deserve it! Sounds like you are an amazing wife and mom, so now you need to worry about your own happiness and getting back into those things you love to do. 

[littleg]

You are totally right @Dragonslayer.  The first year is survival.  We actually hired a babysitter 2-3 hrs 2x a week to get me out of the house a little more.  The upsetting stuff is the prolapse and discomfort and no babysitter can fix that.  But the babysitter can let me go to yoga and pilates and PT and continue working on what will hopefully be an eventual ability to do the things I want to do.  Yesterday my pelvic floor PT told me not to go snowshoeing 1 mile.  I'm a Winter 46r - meaning I've climbed the 46 High Peaks in the Adirondacks in the winter (this makes it seem a little harder than it really was https://www.rei.com/blog/hike/takes-summit-adirondacks-46-highest-peaks).  To be at a point now where my PT thinks 1 mile is too much... its just hard.  But thanks for your support, I hope that by the time we all come out skiing with discount lift tickets (cough, cough) that maybe I'll even be ready to climb a 14er!  

[Guest]

@littleg oh that is totally understandable. I would feel the exact same way. My physical stamina and ability is so important to me and if a doctor told me that I would freak out. You have every right to be upset. Just curious were you seeing the PTs before your pregnancy? Or were these things brought on only after? Keep pushing through though and I’m sure you will have that “breakthrough” moment in the future. And that’s badass about the 46r thing! I am not a hiker at all (prefer sports trending downhill ) but I hiked/ran a 14er once and it was definitely one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I came home and immediately ate an entire pizza, sleeve of Oreos and pint of ice cream and was still starving. I’ll probably never do it again, so total props to you for that. Sounds really hard. And I would encourage you to do a 14er though if you hike a lot, just don’t run . The views at the top are totally worth it. 

As for me, I let the stress of my afternoon Totally get to me. We finally got to come home, but with my dad in one room with the flu, my mom in the other room still needing constant watch and care, and me stressing about 1. My mom possibly getting the flu with her weak immune system 2. Me getting the flu bc that would just suck, and 3. The moment hit when I felt way too much responsibility for caring for both my parents and having the panicked feeling of “oh shit if something happens with Mom I can’t just run and ask a nurse or doctor now. It’s all on me.” And I’m now very appreciative for everything they did to help. I’ve been going nonstop all afternoon to get everything done and care for them, and I got totally overwhelmed for a while. It was almost like a mini panic attack. I felt terrible bc my mom was just driving me crazy with her particularness. Everything has to be perfectly placed in the perfect angle and spot for her to reach with the lighting exactly right and certain blankets folded a certain way and it just goes on and on. I know it’s like that because it’s all she can control right now and she just wants to be comfortable, but I just lost my patience for a bit. Immediately turned to the giant Harry and David gift box we received today. And the rest is history. Damn that company and their delicious boxes of everything. So I end at day 15. Halfway to 30. Totally bummed bc I felt so strong until this afternoon, but I’m just trying to look at it as a moment I got overwhelmed, and learned that I need to continue practicing other ways of managing my stress and anxiety. No excuses and dwelling on it, just learning and moving on. I do Feel like a failure but I’m just going to start again tomorrow. I did make some progress this time and 15 days is way better than the 3-5 I was doing before, so I just have to focus on that. Now instead of half way my goal is to go all the way to 30. Total bummer of an afternoon for me but at least my mom is home and doing better now. That’s what really matters. 

[Brewer5]

@littleg Hello, friend.

I just popped in here tonight for the first time in awhile, and see I had a mention.  I don't know why I get no email notifications from the forum at all.  They've made a lot of changes.  

I'm so glad you remember me as a source of support during some of your most difficult days.  Thank you.  

And I see I'm (almost) just in time for little guy's BIRTHDAY!   Woo hoo -- congrats!   My "baby" will be 11 on Monday.  I didn't remember their birthdays were so close together.  

I hope your friends don't mind me posting here.  I don't really have "a place" anymore.  My old thread is just so... old.  Lol.  

I obviously have not read everything here in 19 pages.  But I'm glad you all have found each other.  The support of others around the world going through similar struggles can help save your sanity at times.   When no one IRL understands what you are feeling, it's great to know *someone* does.   Seriously, can you imagine life before the internet?   In my years here at Whole 30, I made some really good friends.   

Happy New Year & take care, all!

[littleg]

@Dragonslayer Don't have much time but quickly skimmed your post.  Sorry... 

[hmg1993]

@Dragonslayer  Celebrate the 15 days.  Know that you can do it.  Breathe and pick a time to try the 30 when you can.  Not when you think you should or must.  You have a lot going on right now and the most important things are family and health.  Sending hugs,  And for the record, I couldn't resist Harry and David's either!

 

@littleg  My baby is now 19 but I still remember that first year and struggling with me versus mom me.  You sound like you're acing both and I can honestly say the thing I most proud of today is not my career or fitness level, it is having raised a really strong woman.  And one might I add, that has no body or food issues.  Minor miracle that!!  My friend who is a marathoner had a prolapse.  It took 12 months but she's ready to tackle a half now and then onto a full one.  But she had to take baby steps (which for a brief period meant that i could walk with her, which was amazing as normally she doesn't hang out with turtles when exercising!).  It was tougher i think mentally than physically but now she feels that she's stronger if that makes sense?

 

Finally back on the mainland after epic voyage including the world's bumpiest flights.  Not going to lie.  The pinot grigio flowed (three glasses, hic) to get me through it.  But I didn't binge when I got home.  Made a yummy dinner (check out the current whole30 recipes on instagram, there's a great sheet pan series and I made the salmon and blueberry and brussel sprouts one which was amazing.  And I hate fruit with savory things usually!).  And, I got up this morning and went to my exercise class.   Slogging through the frozen tundra.  So feeling good and ready to tackle this binge monster this year.

 

Thanks for all the sleep advice.  Secretly plotting to cut chord on massive TV in bedroom.  It's so happening!!

[Guest]

@hmg1993 glad you had a safe trip back!  And thanks for the support. I think you are right and although I will continue to get back on track while I’m here, maybe I won’t start counting strict until I get back home on Thursday. Less stress to worry about on myself at least. 

[littleg]

@hmg1993 If that had been me on the flight it would have been 3 bottles!  I'm such a wimpy flier!  I'll check out that recipe - thanks for the heads up.  I really hope you find you can make the transition you are hoping for back to your everyday life and the binge eating  You've certainly made these last 45 days seem like a cake walk!  

Would you mind asking your marathon friend what she did to help her prolapse?  Mine isn't terrible (basically just feels like there is a bubble that needs to pop most of the time... so annoying more than painful) but despite doing some good work (strengthening core and pelvic floor and manual PT) my symptoms haven't changed although the strength/scar tissue has :/  Thanks!

@Dragonslayer I hope you've given some thought to how you want to go forward now.  Strict or not - we are here for you!  Hope your whole family is doing better - what a rough time for you guys.  And I sure hope you and your mom do NOT have the flu!  Don't forget to take care of yourself too... go to the gym or a run or something - you can't take care of them if you don't take care of you!