Changing relationship with body and emotions


AmyS

Recommended Posts

I'm not sure if this is exactly the right place to put this, but I think it fits better here than anywhere else.

I did my first Whole30 Sept. 23-Oct.23; and am doing my second one between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

As part of what I'm doing (which is not required for the program, but is definitely required for my personal Whole30), I've been going without caffeine.

I'm realizing that much of what I have attributed to life stress, daily ups and downs, and emotional angst/anxiety has come from the highs and lows of the caffeine/sugar/dairy connection (hello Starbucks Mochas!). As I'm about halfway through my second Whole30 this is becoming much more apparent.

It's almost like my body waits until certain times a day to do certain things. Like, today I was driving to pick up my kids from school and my body felt great, but at the same time I was aware of an inner bodily wariness - something below the emotional level. That is the time when the sugar/dairy would crash and the caffeine would turn into nothing but jitters. And my body is used to going on the defensive at that time of day.

Later today, as I was feeding the animals, making sure the children were actually IN the bath, and doing dinner prep, I realized again that I felt good. I was, again, aware of my body being sort of wary, as if any minute the HUUUGE crash was going to come. It didn't come. It hasn't yet.

I think that there is an emotional component to fighting with and judging myself. But I've either been feeding it (literally), triggering it, or instigating it entirely, by my eating and caffeine/dairy/sugar habits over the years.

It's like my body is feeling good and doesn't believe it. I am not sure if that makes sense. It feels like a level of consciousness within my body, deeper than subconscious thought, even.

This is a follow-up, I think, to what happened in my first Whole30, when I felt like years and years of stress were literally being dissolved at the cellular level.

Anyway, I wish I could describe all of the good things this has done for me. I'm planning how I'm going to enjoy my Dec. 25-Jan.1 break from Whole30 before going back on Jan. 1 or 2 (not sure which day yet). But my feeling right now is that THIS is the time of enjoyment.

It's really really amazing.

Link to post
Share on other sites

This is really interesting. I've had similar reactions but haven't been able to verbalize them as well. "Body going on the defensive" and "body feeling wary" describes well what I've felt... and it really kind of is like my body has emotions.

Cool thoughts! Thanks for sharing!

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm thinking of cutting out coffee in January. For some reason this scares me more than cutting out anything else. It's not a social thing. I never meet people for coffee. Since doing a W30, I don't need the coffee to get going. I used to grab my cup while hitting the alarm (great hubby brought it up to me before leaving for work). My caffeine consumption is limited to coffee before noon. Before W30 it was coffee in the am, soda or tea in the afternoon and another cup of coffee after dinner. No wonder I couldn't sleep! I don't know why I'm holding on to this habit. Glad to hear even more positive effects of ditching the joe.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, it's so strange to experience this. It has altered my perception of consciousness, really. Which has, in turn, altered my perception of my entire life. Like, whoah, maaaan! Hehe

You are blowing my mind, man! LOL

Anyway, I get you totally on this. Yesterday I was thinking to myself, I need a nap. Like my body was obnoxiouly tugging at me. Then I said out loud, "I am not even tired, what is going on?" I centered myself and thought about it and realized that I was just really stressed over a final exam so I did some yoga instead. Before Whole30, I would have just eaten some cookies and then hidden under the covers and slept the afternoon away. It is weird that I "hear" my body saying 2 different things now and I can tell which is being truthful and which is the autopilot that I used to follow without question. It is a little like having multiple personalities but not in a frightening sort of way.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Great stuff Amy... I'm with you all the way.. Yesterday I thought I was going to have a coffee, hadn't had one for a few days, know I can't drink it too regularly.... So I poured it, had a mouthful then poured it down the sink! My body said sure you will enjoy the taste for a few minutes, but then you won't feel as good for the rest of the day... So my mind said... yep you are right so I chucked it out with no regrets! That's a first!

Link to post
Share on other sites

I heart this post. I've loved watching you work through your body's confusing signals and sort out what feedback you need to listen to. Great work.

Thank you so very very much!

Great stuff Amy... I'm with you all the way.. Yesterday I thought I was going to have a coffee, hadn't had one for a few days, know I can't drink it too regularly.... So I poured it, had a mouthful then poured it down the sink! My body said sure you will enjoy the taste for a few minutes, but then you won't feel as good for the rest of the day... So my mind said... yep you are right so I chucked it out with no regrets! That's a first!

Yeah, I just finished my second Whole30 and had one of my formerly favorite Starbucks coffee drinks, and I realized this isn't even fun anymore. It just isn't fun! The fun? Baking and scooping out a huge spaghetti squash. Haha (Making chocolate chili for dinner tonight too. The kids are going insane wanting me to make it now, but I have too many chores to blast through first.)

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm still thinking about having coffee LOL but havent actually succumbed. Its just not fun anymore as you said :( I would love to try spaghetti squash, its not well known here at all. I felt like something different from my usual soup with meat or leftovers or eggs for brekkie today so made pizza... yeah for breakfast..... its not swypo for me as I wasnt eating pizza before... I have to chuckle sometimes when I think how different some of my meals are. And today I ate chicken skin for the first time in about 20 years...fat is no longer the enemy! Luckily we can get really good produce here.... Best wishes for your third attempt, you are way ahead of me, I am still focusing on the gut healing, emotional healing will come after that if I am lucky

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.