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Today is Day 58; two more days! Super Blue Blood Moon tomorrow and Day 60 the next day! But thanks!

YUM! YUM! Good for you! That sounds so interesting. I love keeping traditional methods and stories alive; it's so important!

That spinach sounds amazing. We've quit buying the regular baby spinach in the grocery (even organic) because we got so used to chard and various kales that the spinach doesn't seem to have much texture or taste. My 8 year old got on a rant a while back about not being able to go out and eat anywhere because of the way I eat. He cuts me some slack during W30 but I'm sure he'll be chomping at the bit as soon as I'm finished. Hmmm...I may neglect to mention that Day 60 is Thursday ;). Reintro is almost as strict, though so that should buy me another 10 days or so!

I think my first re-intro is going to be corn. It doesn't give me any digestive/systemic issues that I've noticed and I have decided that life without grits is just...sad and I LOVE just-picked fresh corn and popcorn. In an effort to mitigate what damage has been done to commercially available corn, I splurged on an order from Anson Mills. I have heirloom, stone-ground grits coming as well as an heirloom variety of popcorn and another heirloom variety of dried corn that I want to use to make my own hominy/masa. So, I will pay attention during re-intro and if I truly do not have any issues with it, I will add it back into my diet sparingly but joyously.

We had the Gingerbread Pork Stew for dinner last night and it was really good. I don't think we've had a stew with pork before. The weirdest thing happened, though, and I survived to tell the tale. I was pre-cooking some Brussels sprouts in the microwave so they wouldn't take as long to sauté and I thought they smelled funny- kinda sour. I decided that that was nuts since they were fresh and sautéed them up anyway. The smell didn't go away and I thought they tasted funny, too. I asked my husband what he thought and he very carefully tasted one and totally agreed that there was something really wrong with those Brussels. By then I had eaten a couple of them trying to convince myself that I was imagining it but finally decided that we didn't even want to put them in the compost. We sent them all to the septic tank where they belong then spent all evening wondering if we were going to get sick. We seemed to have come through it unscathed!

Robert Heinlein has long been my favorite author and I was so, so sad when he died. He wrote several novels around a character named Lazarus Long and those are definitely my faves. There is a lot of time travel involved and several of the other characters pop up in other books as well so there's lots of intermingling of stories that you don't notice until you meet the characters elsewhere. Stranger in a Strange Land  is his most well known book and a couple of the same characters are in there, too but the last 4 on this list are my go-to books when I want something warm and comfortable to read.

 

 

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I've always wanted to read Stranger in a Strange Land. My older sister read it when she was a teen, and often referred to grocking...so it's been in my awareness all my life, and I just haven't gotten to it yet...so thanks for the prompt, I am going to read it, and have noted the other titles you listed!!

That's weird about the Brussels! I wonder what happened...good that you didn't get sick.

All that heirloom corn and popcorn sounds heavenly. I can't wait to hear what it's like for you to explore in your re-intro of corn. I too find corn and homemade masa really comforting. I love eating popcorn as an occasional treat. Two weekends ago I made a batch in ghee and tossed it with slightly caramelized ghee/honey. Very decadent...I didn't have any adverse reactions to that combination, but I know better than to make it a habit.

Now that I have had that more hearty baby spinach, I can absolutely see why you would let go of regular, tender-leaved baby spinach...I'm so enjoying my salad greens with that in it. Today's lunch will have Moroccan-spiced tenderloin sliced over that gorgeous salad mix, yellow bell pepper, zuccs, with a dressing made up of orange-muscat champagne vinegar, olive oil, and a bit of dijon - so simple and so joyful on my palette. I've never had champagne vinegar before (a gift from a friend, from Trader Joe's - TJs is prohibitively far away for me to go very often, like you and Whole Foods) - and I see Vitacost has come so that will be in my next order. OMG I love this stuff.

Your giving your eight year old such a great model of being conscious about food and how food makes you feel!!! Lucky little boy. I guess it's his job to complain at this age, and probably for a while, but kudos to you for doing what you do, for yourself, and as a parent too!

I got up at 5 am to see the lunar event, and went out for a hike by 6:45. I felt like taking pictures, so I was a little pokey, but still got a good work-out. I'm exploring relaxing my expectations of myself, with a consciousness on potential complacency (hello doubt) and adding play into the mix. I'm missing my morning routine of journaling after the stretch and sit. I'm a bit meandering away from my habits, but I think it's a discovery process, and I'll just have to trust myself, right?

It's going to be a long day with month end procedures after closing, so I'd better get myself going!

You're almost at the finish line!!!!

 

 

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Hahaha the 8 year-old I was referring to was my husband :) No kids for me; it's all I can do to parent those cats and my husband insists that they're as weird as they are because of their upbringing!

I was up at 5 too and was able to watch about half of the eclipse from my sofa with a cup of coffee before the moon got behind the hill. We live in a hollow so we were lucky that we got to see it at all. After that I was treated to a beautiful sunrise. I've been driving to work in the dark so that was an added bonus and a lovely way to start my day.

Your popcorn sounds delicious! My corn re-intro will be Sunday so I'll have grits for breakfast and popcorn later in the day, for sure! I've never had champagne vinegar either. I think I'll have to give it a try. I made a lemon vinaigrette yesterday to go on the arugula & radicchio salad I fixed to go with my wonton meatballs. It was nice to have something different on my salad instead of my standard red wine vinegar. I keep reading about balsamic vinegar reduction for veggies and I want to try that too but wanted to wait until I start introducing small amounts of sweeter things. I know that, technically, the balsamic is compliant but I figure that reducing it is concentrating the natural sugars and might not be best for me during W30/W60.

Vitacost discovery: if you put stuff in your cart but don't complete the purchase, they will usually send you an email with a 10% discount code in it.

I might reread Stranger in a Strange Land sooner rather than later. It's been a while since I've spent time with Valentine Michael Smith and I just found out that Heinlein's widow released the uncut version after he died so I'm definitely going to check that out.

It's all a discovery process, right? I'm excited about tomorrow being Day 60 and feel like I am up to the task of riding my own bike and being the best me I can be!

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I'm laughing!!! OMG, your eight year old. I'm so naive: I'm like, "oh, she had a son!!!" Ha ha ha! Yeah, you and me both, and our weird cats! Of course, yours gets the prize, opening doors and such. Ours tries with all her might to hypnotize us with her eyes and voice, to do her will, which is of course to put more food in the bowl. I'm not unsympathetic.

Happy day 60!!!!!! You made it! What a ride we've been on since December, eh?

Thanks for the tip about Vitacost!!! I'll remember that.

Oh, to see the eclipse from the comfort of home! Our view was blocked by trees, so I went outside every 15 minutes or so to see the changes. I was tempted to make a sitting meditation out of it - getting bundled up, making a comfy seat and just watching - alas, it was pretty cold, and I felt compelled to putter around the house and do chores and such....yes, it was so cool to see the sunrise as the whole thing was reaching its finalé! How wonderful!

Can you believe I can't find arugula near me? I miss it so. Your vinaigrette sounds great. I've made balsamic reduction a few times for steaks, and my memory is that is smells pretty bad until it's just about done, which you probably already knew. Here's a funny if not slightly hyperbolic description: https://evolutionaryfoodie.wordpress.com/2011/07/25/a-balsamic-reduction-otherwise-known-as-culinary-napalm/ 

Today's my day to get down to the grocery, an hour one-way, and other shopping for the store. So I'm thinking bison chili again, some to share with a friend for their bday, cod piccata, iHeart's lions head meatballs which has been on my list for a while. Crispy green beans, my first try. Tons of salad again, Brussels for roasting with bacon and maybe apples this time, too, and a second batch of the pizza casserole.

Congratulations, Holly!

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Thanks! Part One is done so now on to the hard part- riding my own bike, the part where I failed last time. Feb 1 sounded SO far way when I started and it still sounded like forever away after 30 days but now it just sort of came and went and here we are on Groundhog Day. It's a little anti-climactic but maybe that's a good thing. Just keep on keeping on with no fuss and no muss. I refuse to "Groundhog Day" my W30, though. I did take my vitamins this morning so I've already had a minute amount of rice flour but I am sticking to the plan. I was going to reward myself with something after I finished but now I feel like finishing was a reward in an of itself. I'll take that as a NSV! Lost 5 more lbs, too. I was hoping for 7 but that's ok. Actually, per Meadowlilly, I didn't lose them; I don't want them back. I released them:lol: 

For better or for worse, I read ALL of Meadowlilly's 160 page, 3 year long stream-of-consciousness posts. She has lots of amazing pics and good things to say but I think it's making me obsess over what she obsesses over and I don't need any help in that department:) I know I need to break off my relationship with the scale but I also want to use it as a tool during reintro. Is that an excuse? A crutch? She even thinks that concentrating on NSV's is just the flip side of weighing. I know everyone is different and we all have different methods to our madnesses but maybe I shouldn't have done a total immersion in her posts.

An hour one-way to the grocery! Yowie! I bet you don't forget your grocery list at home! It's about 25 minutes for me to a regular grocery and about 45 minutes to the farmer's market but it's pretty barren this time of year. It's a shame you can't find arugula. Surprisingly, it's one of the few things I get at the regular grocery store and it's one of my favorites, too. Woohooo that was funny!! Thanks for the link; I had no idea but now I have a morbid curiosity to find out and may have to do a balsamic reduction this weekend. The only napalm I knew about in the kitchen was Cajun Napalm- better know as roux. If you've ever splashed hot roux on you, you know what I mean! It sticks! And it burns! Stir gently.

I was going to make chicken piccata last night but I was trying to finish Meadowlilly's thread and let my husband have his way in the kitchen. It doesn't happen often, so what the heck! He made pan-fried spicy chicken strips so I pulled out the rest of the ranch dressing, a big pile of raw brocc and cherry tomatoes and made a party platter! It was so good I'm having it again today for lunch. I haven't even thought about what to cook-up this weekend. I guess I better get on the ball. Chile sounds good; it was 19 this morning so something warming will definitely be on the menu.

Thanks for all of the support! You know, no one else knows I finished my 60 days. B)

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I like what you said about keeping on with no fuss...you are so psyched to start riding your own bike, and you are already doing it...I'm glad you're not obsessing over the minute amount of rice flour in your vitamins, for example. For what it's worth, that seems perfectly sane and fair enough, and not cheating yourself the chance to observe how the rice flour alone made you feel...you trust and trusted your judgment. Releasing pounds, not losing them: I like it!!!

I adore Meadowlilly! I haven't read all that you have, but find her to be one of the stand-out bright, wise voices on these boards. I admire your self awareness about obsessing on her and cautioning yourself not to take on her stuff. Go, Ninja. Yeah, I think you are cultivating your own version of the wisdom of Meadowlily, the wisdom of HollySmokes, and taking a rest from the looking glass and turning inward sounds very sane to me.

As for using the scale during your re-intro, I think you know what you're doing. If it starts to feel unhealthy, I think you will make any adjustments necessary. You know what is best for you. As Carissa Pinkola Estes says in her wonderful book Women Who Run with the Wolves, we have a radar that is always scanning for what needs attention, or what to be let go, and it seems that your consideration of how to use the scale at this point is definitely part of your process. It seems like fodder for the journal! Do you journal as part of your food log? I'm not writing it down lately, but definitely have my own version of what you're doing.

This week I've enjoyed lots of W30 cooking, but have been exploring eating my breakfast meat/veg dishes on sourdough toast such as the curried chicken salad, and the potsticker stir fry (that tasted better in the following days, with plenty of salt!)...and also taking coffee with almond milk (added sugar), and a few condiments here and there with added sugar. I'm exercising as I can, definitely not over doing it, and monitoring to see how I feel, and so far, so good, but next week I'll zip it back to W30 compliance. I only had one night of hot flashes....I'm tempted to step on the scale, but I don't because I'm afraid I'll be disappointed, so I come back to knowing that my weight loss is gradual, and to trust myself to keep on keeping on (just as you said!) and trust the process.

Your presence here as new friend and sounding board has helped me a lot. Sometimes I feel wavery in my self trust and self confidence, and coming to our thread helps keep me in the spirit of things, and honest with myself. 

I found some magical new simple ways to fill in my eyebrows (historically thick and dark, but thinning with age) that I think doesn't look like make-up - I know this is off-topic, but it is like a magical accent on the overall improvement I'm feeling - and something I didn't think was possible.

Things don't have to be the way they've always been, and unlike the big message from our culture, it doesn't have to be a downward descent, we can get better as we age, and smarter...

To work....happy day to you!!

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Another weekend of cooking my brains out! I need to find other things to do on the weekend even though it does make my work-week easier. I probably should have gotten some seeds started so that will be my plan for next weekend instead of spending all of my time in the kitchen. I think I am subconsciously using it as an excuse not to socialize. Our social life usually revolves around a local bar/restaurant for a few drinks. It's a "Cheers" kind of place except that they allow smoking so during the winter when it's all closed up it really, really stinks- bad enough that I plan washing my hair around when we go there and will hold a load of laundry until after we get home so we can toss our stinky clothes right in. Doesn't sound too attractive when I describe it like that, huh? That's why I've been wanting to stay home more- that's my story and I'm sticking to it! The next two Saturdays we have concerts to go to, though, and I can't wait. I will probably re-intro alcohol for those. I'll probably have a beer at the show this weekend but only if they have something yummy that I really want to drink and a fancy cocktail before the show the next weekend. I was having some gastric distress issues before I started my W60 so I kept a food log to see if I could identify any food triggers. Of course, I didn't have a single post-lunch emergency ladies room run during the whole thing so now I'm thinking it might be related to beer/alcohol?

Your eyebrows are definitely not off topic! Meadowlilly has several posts about not going out looking like a slob (not implying that you look like a slob or anything :)). I think it is a re-post of Melissa's or maybe a section from ISWF but I think it's definitely relevant to everything we're trying to accomplish here. It might not be something anyone else notices but if it's something that bothers you then it matters. My Mom's eyebrows are almost invisible now and it really bothers her even though I think she looks fine. She's 78 but could easily pass for 65-70 and is always nicely dressed and accessorized. I don't go out looking like a slob but I do the bare minimum to look decent and rarely accessorize unless we're going someplace special- like a concert! At home, however, it's a different story. Since I'm always cooking and I wear whatever I cook, I have old T shirts and fleece tops that are loose and comfortable and full of stains that I wear all of the time so I don't ruin my "real" clothes. I finally tie-died some just to camouflage the stains! My Mom works at a ladies clothing store so she sends me pretty things because she knows I won't spend the money on myself. Being overweight just isn't conducive to going shopping and spending money on clothes. I am working on changing that mindset, though. I just bought a pair of black leggings to wear around the house and am trying to muster up the inner strength to toss my favorite pair of sweatpants that are so old they barely stay up. The two XXL, frayed and stained T-shirts I wore this weekend should accompany the sweat pants! Confession: I used to love to watch "What Not To Wear" and that was always one of their big themes as well. No matter what your size and shape, with a little effort, you can look good and owe it to yourself.

I was snack-y all day Saturday and was worried that I was awakening my sugar dragon but I think it was just a mental rebound from being set free of the rules and having to ride my own bike. Yesterday was much better. Today & tomorrow I'm going to stick to the rules except for a bit of added sugar in a couple of things. I have a little country ham in my breakfast casserole that I'm pretty sure was cured with sugar. Wednesday will be dairy day. 

OK enough self analysis for a Monday morning! Re-intro! My grits yesterday morning were amazing! Dinner last night was buffalo wings and popcorn so I was able to have my popcorn without making it a snack- football snack food without the football! It was delicious, too. But... I woke up at 1130 having a coughing fit because my sinuses were a mess. That happens to me periodically and I haven't been able to track down the source of my sinus issues. I was hoping that eating clean would make them go away so I could figure it out during re-intro. I think I mentioned that I stopped all antihistamines and it didn't didn't really make a difference- not sure if that's good, bad or indifferent. SO, not sure if it was corn-related or a coincidence so I guess I'll have another corn-y day in a couple of weeks to see if I can replicate my misery.

Thank you for being here. It's so good to have a place to discuss all of these things and have a sympathetic ear to bend. Hope you had a fabulous weekend!

 

 

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I had a big wake-up call this weekend. The sourdough bread re-intro last week seemed to not be a problem. Then I had diet coke on both Friday and Saturday, and it stirred up the sugar dragon Big Time. I had an out of control spell on Saturday and indulged in candy that was seriously not really worth it. So I spent Sunday mostly compliant, and today it's back to the basics. No messing around (added sugar okay here, but that's it). I think the bread and diet coke together, for me, is a new no-no. Bread was sneakily tempting the dragon, but sweet soda, even diet, on top of it, yeah, duh, Lisbette, what were you thinking? Ok, message received!!!! I feel sure that this part, even the transgression, is part of re-wiring the brain. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. LOL

My plan for the weekend had been to finish off that transcription, and not cook. But I realized that at that moment, since my cooking was gone, filling the kitchen with compliant cooking was absolutely a survival thing. So I cooked up another Italian sausage/kale casserole (more veg, more eggs, super yum), another batch of chili, and roasted a huge tray of chicken thighs with a thick coat of yummy spice rub. So with lots of green things in the fridge, we are set for the week. When I was done I sat down with my project in earnest, and *nearly* finished the transcription....so not a total loss.

I admire your self awareness about the way you're spending the weekends. I grew up in the midwest, and totally remember smoke filled rooms in winter. Yikes. Of course, all that cooking is so key to what we're doing. Will it be challenging to venture out into the world, and get all your cooking done? How will you swing it? It seems it definitely gets easier, less time-comsuming, as promised, doesn't it? Do you ever cram a little cook-up action into the weeknights after work? You're a kitchen goddess, Holly.

I haven't read the Meadowlily stuff you mentioned. But I have noticed that if I'm making the effort to wear jewelry and put together outfits no matter how casual, but sorting out the elements of it, it's a sign of my inner-happiness. When I've been more overweight in the past than I am now, I practically lived in a uniform of comfy black clothes. Same for when I was not that overweight, but depressed and feeling blah. I imagine it will be fun to get a little dressed up for the upcoming concerts!!! You've lost a lot of weight recently. Are you enjoying new clothes, or old favorites out of your closet?

Sweet day!

 

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Well, you know, the only way we're going to learn how to ride our own bikes is to go off-roading every now and then. Now you know! Soft drinks aren't a temptation for me but there was a cute mini boule of local, artisanal sourdough bread at the little neighborhood grocery where I stop to get my husband cream for his coffee and it wanted to come home with me so badly! The truth is that it never would have made it home intact. I think that, in the future, it might be something that I decide is worth it every now and then but now is not the right time. After that, the loaf of bread I got for my husband to make sammies was looking pretty good to me so I imagine that if I had caved to that craving, it might have gotten ugly! Meadowlily again (this time spelled correctly!): "Mistakes repeated more than once are a decision." I'm really trying to keep that in the front of my mind so I can remember that mistakes will happen but it's a learning experience.

Your cook-up sounds way more sensible than mine! I had some chicken bone broth going in the crock pot so I got that strained out last night. I do cook during the week but try not to get into big projects that I'll regret because I'm tired, it's late and I'm not at a stopping point. If I don't have something ready or mostly ready for dinner, we keep it simple and just pan-fry some kind of protein (burger, chop or a little sirloin steak) and either put it on a big salad or do some kind of quick veg. Pre W30 I was relying on that way too often and it was getting really boring and repetitive. It's more work but one of my "treats" to myself is to have good, tasty meals. It helps when I can get ahead of the game and have some portions of good stuff in the freezer so I've been working on that. 

My weight loss seems to have come to a screeching halt. I refuse to be discouraged over the numbers but am concerned that it's because of fruit and re-intro foods. I know it's really too soon to tell so I just need to work on patience. I feel good and I definitely feel thinner and stronger. I'm enjoying my clothes being loose and being able to wear things I haven't been able to in a while. I haven't gotten any new clothes because I still need to "release" more fat :P but if an occasion arises and I don't have something to wear, I WILL go get something new. That's so much better than having to go get new clothes because everything is too small. I should go buy new bras. I had a pattern in that past where every time I splurged on new bras I immediately lost a bunch of weight and couldn't fit in them any more LOL!

Happy Tuesday!

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I like the mantra about mistakes and decisions! I feel like I need to go back to the books -- ISWF especially. Work and volunteer work keeps me so incredibly busy, I need to make time to do this, and make it a priority. When I re-intro other foods, I cut back on fat, and as a result, I'm not sated as long, and then over-eating a little, like tonight, with dinner at the Mexican joint....I'm still finding a balance on the bike!

Tomorrow I have a breakfast date with a friend, so compliance may be iffy. But I'll have a compliant lunch at work, and also at home for dinner. Wobbly this week.

Do you have a place where you can get properly fitted for your new bras? Have you ever done that? I highly recommend it! Where I live, any Macy's lingerie department has someone who can do it. It's free, and makes such a big difference!

Is it possible that the weight loss has slowed to a snail's pace? I guess it's not linear, that it's faster at times and slower at others. I'm already plotting my next W30, maybe in March. Yeah, I'm thinking March. I'm humbled by this process. 

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Yeah, I have to keep reminding myself that mistakes are going to happen and just learn from them. It's hard to keep your balance on that bike and I think that's an area that I need to work on. I can't be a hermit. If I can't find a balance then it won't be sustainable and I definitely want it to be. I'm such a short time into my re-intro that I haven't even thought about another one yet. I'm hoping I can learn to ride my own bike well enough not to backslide but only time and my determination will tell. It is a very humbling process, isn't it? I hadn't thought about it that way. Yesterday I was chaffing a bit at the rules/restrictions but I'll get over it- just being whiney. I got home and forced myself to row for 30 minutes. I'm up to 2.8 miles:D and felt better for having done it. Also slept really well last night.

March is going to be a rough month for me compliance-wise. Still not sure how I'm going to manage meals on my Big Bend trip and now it's really starting to look like my husband won't be able to go. I'm so disappointed and have to figure out how to get everything out of this trip on my own that I would like to . Gonna have to ride the big girl bike! :o I tend to be an introvert and not having my husband there as a comfort zone makes it harder. Even though it's family (with a 4 year old!) and close family friends, I get into people overload pretty easily. I know that when all is said and done, I will be so glad that I went and had a big adventure with the fam.

I don't know what to make of the weight loss stall. My intent was to use the scale as a tool to help me decide if adding higher carb foods, dairy, etc makes a difference in my weight loss effort but now I don't know what to do with the information I have. Other than a tiny amount of added sugar in ham/bacon at breakfast and my vitamins, I have been compliant ( and 2 servings of corn on Sunday). My dairy re-intro scheduled for today was a flop; my yogurt didn't yog. I suspected that the yogurt I was using as a starter was too old and I was right.

I have never had a bra fitting but I'm going to when it's time for new ones. My Mom works at Chico's and one of their sister companies is Soma so I'll go there because I get a discount even if it's not on sale. My Mom buys everything using my customer number so it looks like I'm a shopaholic when they look in their system.

Focusing on the NSV's...

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Yes, focusing on the NSVs, way to go. My older sister, her husband, and a legion of friends I know are heroes and heroines in 12-step recovery, and I have come to view it as one of the wisdom traditions of the world. At first, I bristled at all the "cliché" sayings they use, but I have adopted many of them, and in our conversation, I want to say, "One day at a time". 

I got up early today to hike, but now I'm short on time and have to dash and get ready for a long day, but I'll write more tomorrow!!! Keep up the great work with your re-intro - sorry about the yogurt!

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I know in theory that a bad day doesn't have to be a bad week, and so what a world of difference a good day (in actual practice!), yesterday, makes psychologically, emotionally, and physically. Whew! I was planning to have a compliant week, but Tuesday was a super fun day with two social occasions - one a farewell soiree potluck and Scrabble party followed by a visit to a 90 year old friend (my oral history subject) who wanted to celebrate his bday with sharing a bottle of wine. I *chose* to enjoy myself with food and wine, so I shouldn't moralize it being a bad day - I know that's the whole point of riding your own bike - but I did experience some guilt and despair at the possibility that I may be out of control because I had wanted to be compliant - it was a foolish plan given that all this was on the calendar...I spent yesterday back to what makes me feel best - compliance. I realize that compared to previous eras, whatever transgressions I committed on Tuesday were *nothing*, but I have changed! Again, it's a process, and I hope with time I will not experience that guilt and despair...I think it's because my weight is not where I want it to be still, so I need to just keep doing what I'm doing, and know it can be slow, as long as I don't throw in the towel. Calendaring is not always my strong suit. 

I'm liking the idea of mini re-sets. I'll be working with that in mind.

Meanwhile, I have learned to my surprise that I cannot tolerate beans. A couple of times now I've made compliant meals or ate compliant meals out with the one exception of whole beans, and no. can. do.  Funny, that was not the case last spring. So that is changing, too....I accept this.

Have you thought about just using the scale once per month, or once per season?

I love Chico's!

When is your Big Bend trip? Congrats to your husband for getting the job - it sounds like it's not quite yet a done deal, but close...what can you do to take care of your needs if you get into people overload on your trip? I'm sensing you may need to retreat for some alone time? This seems very reasonable.

That's great that the exercise is helping with sleep! The inversion layer we have right now is keeping the air yucky, but the mornings are better, and I should be hiking more often...psyching for that.

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Hey! You got back on your bike Sunday & Monday after off-roading on Saturday (with a lesson learned under your belt) and your Tuesday excursion sounds like a lovely day. I know it's hard but don't go down the good/bad, black/white path. It doesn't sound to me like you were out of control. A day that is spiritually, emotionally and psychologically good is, perhaps, worth a bit of off-roading. Yes?

Yep, it looks like he'll be data mining for Medicare fraud, something he really likes and believes in so he's pretty pumped. There are a couple more loose ends to tie up before he can resign his current position but he doesn't foresee hitting any snags and hopes he'll be in his new position before the end of the month. My trip (ahhh-hate saying "my" instead of "our") is exactly 6 weeks from today- end of March. I'll bring a good book with me and, since I'm an early riser, I'd like to do a couple of short hikes early & alone before the others get up. I haven't even started researching them yet but I'm sure I can find something that fits the bill. Part of the group is in the 30-35 year age group and they are pretty hard partiers so I want to try to focus on NOT falling into that hole too far. It would be easy, especially on vacation.

I haven't tried beans yet. I'm so used to NOT having them that I don't know how "worth it" it is. Black beans & rice and red beans & rice were staples when I was growing up - Cuban and Cajun heritage! How's that for a mix?! I did have a cocktail yesterday evening, though, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Since I didn't re-intro dairy, I decided that I'd do alky-hol. I had one drink, didn't crave another and noticed no bad side effects. I'll try wine & beer separately and it would be really convenient if I lost my taste for beer ;) cuz I love me a nice craft beer and the microbrew business is booming here.

Right now I need to work on just hitting the scale once a week!! I'm so worried about backsliding even though I'm still eating really well and haven't even been non-compliant very much. I'm being really frustrated but trying not to let it change my path.

Onward!

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Thanks for the encouraging words. We're taking a three day weekend this weekend, so yesterday was for me a day of errands and shopping, and some work at the store, after all, but I really enjoyed just. not. being. in a hurry. That part alone made me feel like I was on vacation. On my hour-long drive back up the hill to store and home I decided to change my attitude because I've grown bored with that insecure/slightly afraid b.s. - that does not suit me - and decided to adopt the hope, courage and confidence that W30 gives me, even while riding my own bike. I can do this, I'm not doomed, where did I get that nonsense? Remember Cher in Moonstruck? Snap out of it! That's what I did. And today is, as you said, Onward. I love it.

I like your idea to hit the scale once a week - and I totally get your worry about back-sliding - after all, you've witnessed my trip lately! For those of us wanting to slim down, this has to be so normal, and is so understandable. I think the scale only adds to frustration. Obviously that has been said and written a million times, but theory and practice are different animals, and we are in the most personal practice and at this point figuring it out for ourselves...right? You mentioned focusing on the NSVs. Meadowlily's caution about NSVs aside, have you made a comprehensive list? I'd love to see that! In fact, since it is a one year anniversary since my first W-rodeo, maybe I'll make one too, and we can trade next week? = )

Are you on IG? There was a recent W-30 post from someone who just finished her 6th or 7th one, and was humbly expressing how it is just now that some of the fundamentals are really sinking in. This is comforting to me. We are so not the only ones.

Today I let myself sleep in. It feels like Sunday, but we still have two more days - wahoo! ... and I will tend to the yard a bit for the first time in weeks, and also cook and clean, and color my hair. 

Hey, tonight is your concert, can't wait to hear about it!

You're rocking your re-intros this time around. It really makes a difference to be more scientific, doesn't it? I'm really puzzled, personally, about the beans, because since summer 2017 that seemed to be okay. But in the fall was when my moon cycles stopped, so maybe that is a goodly part of the game changer. Holly, Cuban and Cajun - what a wonderful combination! I'm observing in a little awe that given how much you historically loved your rice and beans of all colors and stripes, that you're not craving them the way you did corn and masa. Do you subscribe to the belief/feeling that what we crave is in part what our bodies need for nourishment? Cravings aside, of course...I wonder if that is part of the equation of the mental/emotional/physical fine tuning that we do with these re-sets.

Congrats to your husband! I sympathize with your feelings about doing the trip in six weeks sola. It seems like the early-rising and hiking gives you a very credible/easy to accept "out" if you also turn in early when the partying heats up among your loved ones, or even if everyone is stone cold sober, but you just need your solitude. <insert tapping index finger at the temple>  Then if you *want* to stay up later with folks, you can, your choice either way. And you have six weeks to figure out the food part, a nice cushion of time. I know that Melissa H. has made famous the saying, "this is not hard" but, I swear, it has been my experience since I took care of a parent with Alzheimer's disease some years ago, that whenever I'm faced with a challenge, it is incredibly helpful to remind myself, "this is not the hardest thing I have ever done" and every challenge I get through (like taking on some of the bookkeeping at our store, for eg) fortifies me for future self confidence as I age. I want to be a fearless old person.

Sorry so long...this is me not in such a darned hurry. 

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I was going to take a peek at the forum yesterday but never did and now I'm glad. You post was uplifting, supportive and motivational; just right for first thing Monday morning! Thanks!

I hope your 3-day weekend was fabulous. Did y'all go anywhere or just stay home and enjoy the time off? For me, this weekend was payback for the last couple of cook-up-a-thons I had. Aside from meals, the only thing I cooked was some beets and my breakfasts for the week. Note to self: when you put beet and chard stems in your eggs, remember that your breakfast will be pink!! :rolleyes: The concert Saturday was terrific even though the weather was terrible. I pre-bought our tickets because I knew that, unless there was money involved, if we were warm and dry at home, there was no way we were going to drive into town in the rain at a time that's fairly close to bedtime! It was a standing room only kind of venue but they had a couple of tables and we were able to grab one and they had a local beer that I really like so I had my planned beer. It was delicious! It was a style of beer that I typically only want one of, so that was perfect. I made it last then switched to water. And had to get up in the middle of the night to pee, of course but no other ill effects. Oh well, small price to pay! We even managed to sleep until after 7 Sunday morning! Wooohoo! The rest of the weekend was relaxing. It was grey, raining and foggy so I read a bunch and we binged some TV. Ahhhh.

Have you tried the Thai Kitchen red curry paste? That's some tasty (compliant) stuff! I sautéed green beans and cauli in some brown butter ghee then added a blob of the curry paste and it was so good. I have enough green beans & cauli to do it again so that will be on the menu one day this week. Aside from my beer, I was compliant all weekend except for some Applegate salami that I had for dinner last night AND, I've lost a pound AND stayed off of the scale all weekend until this morning. I'm going to try to stick to the once a week weigh-in. I rowed on Saturday but was highly unmotivated to get off my butt yesterday. It was the cat's fault. Our little girl Katrina rescue kitty likes me to stay on the sofa with a fuzzy blanket for her to sleep on.

I'm surprised that I don't crave beans as well. Like greens, I've never met one I didn't like. I had some red beans last spring- the real-deal Camellia red beans from Louisiana that I had to mail-order. They were really good and didn't bother me in any way but also didn't send me off into bean cravings either. I definitely believe that our cravings can be our body's way of getting our attention but now I know that I have to pay attention to the craving. Is it nutritious or is it my inner 5-year old having a tantrum? It's getting easier to tell them apart now, isn't it?

Taking care of a loved one, especially a parent, with Alzheimer's has to be the hardest thing. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. My father died recently of a blood cancer and when he was finally diagnosed after months of me pushing him, two of the things I was grateful for was that his mind would stay intact and he wouldn't be in horrible pain at the end of his life. Both of those wound up not being true but not until the very, very end. Our trip to Big Bend is actually to honor his wish for his ashes to be spread there but I am more joyful to be spending time with everyone that I am mourning. As you know, the mourning will go on. Time spent with those you love is precious.

On ‎2‎/‎10‎/‎2018 at 2:25 PM, LadyLisbette said:

I want to be a fearless old person.

Yes!

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Oh, I deeply sympathize with the loss of your father. Sigh! I admire your remarks about spending time with loved ones - yes, and I really believe the reports I hear about how rituals such as the one you will do in Big Bend, in whatever way we memorialize our loved ones  is actually good for our health. We were talking about Le Guin recently, and I will share one of my favorite excerpts, from Earthsea:

Only in silence the word,

Only in darkness light,

Only in dying life:

Bright the hawk's flight on an empty sky.

-- The Creation of Éa

I feel like when my parents died, each of them in their own way, was teaching me stuff still. In a weird way Mom's dementia was one of the best things that ever happened to me, and I am so grateful. I'm also really grateful that I had so much life experience to help me cope - with my stress, but also to cope with her in an imaginative, "meet her where she is" kind of way. Believe it or not, and as tragic as it was, we had an awfully good time, and I know I gave each other a good last two years together. 

Ooh, I've never tried that curry paste, but I've put it on my list - sounds yummy! Yeah, we just stayed home for our long weekend, and it was divine. I really enjoyed my own cooking! I made a big roast of brussels, yams, apple, and bacon. I finally got out my new spiralizer, and made zoodles. AND I have been checking out Ali more, and made a dish inspired by her: I got the oil real hot and added sliced garlic, anchovy paste, red chili pepper flakes (the basis of beloved puttanesca!!), added small chopped broccoli, the zoodles, leftover rotisserie chicken, then added fresh lemon juice, and topped it off with lemon zest and toasted pepitas. It was pretttttty darned lemony, but I really liked it. In fact, I might even bring some good hard cheese into the house to add to something like that. I'm also dreaming of making a cauli crusted pizza, with, again, just a little bit of cheese. I have had someone else's cauli crust pizza and it was heavenly. We're not big on pizza, and I never crave it, but that crust is so savory, have you ever had it or made it? Next up pork medallions with the caramel apple sauce I made on the weekend. Later in the week lion's head meatballs.

I did get a good hike in this morning. I was a bit slow, but that's ok, I'm in begin-again mode.

LOL pink breakfast, and bravo for the fun concert! I'm terrible at sipping and making something last. I should take a page out of your book, there!

Will you do something special for V-day? I'm thinking of a maiden voyage with spiralized yam oven fries and, probably pork medallions because of that huge tenderloin in my fridge...Hubby won't drink alcohol except on Saturday, but I might open a bottle of red, anyway, we'll see. I'm so grateful he isn't into sweets, it's easier to keep a safe house/safe pantry here. Sometimes after dinner I bring out a small bowl with pistachios and a couple of dates - I'll probably do that for a "sweet". Like you, pistachios are a giganto favorite for both of us.

Thanks, Holly, sweet day to you!

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Thanks for sharing that excerpt from Earthsea; it's beautiful. I found the second book in the series and am keeping an eye out for the first one so I can get started on them. A year ago, my Dad and I were talking on the anniversary of my grandmother's death 12 years before and I mentioned how much I still missed her (we were very close) and wondered if that would ever change. His response was that it wouldn't change but it would evolve. I keep that thought with me.

Since we had something special planned for the Saturdays before & after V-day, I figured those would be our celebrations. I'm terribly UNromantic about stuff like that but, surprisingly, my husband is not. At his suggestion, we'll have something special for dinner- just have to figure out what. He doesn't like wine (sweets & chocolate are another story) but I might join you in that glass of red :) I've had part of a nice box of red sitting in the basement all during my W60. I tried a cauli crust a long time ago but if I remember correctly, it had a sh!t-ton of cheese in it to hold it together. I liked it but never did make it again. I like pizza, hubby LOVES pizza. I picked one up for him Friday at Whole Food (made a special trip because they had it on sale for National Pizza Day!) and he said it was "less than mediocre" so I felt bad that I got his pizza hopes up then dashed them in mediocrity. I'll make it up to him! You'r puttanesca-ish dinner sounds delicious, I think I'd totally splurge on some Parm on that! I have all of those ingredients, too, so I think I'm going to have to recreate it this week. Have you tried cauli "tortillas"? Those I do like and they freeze really well so I usually make a double batch. I made some right before embarking on this journey so they're still in the freezer and will be coming out for taco night (AKA dairy re-intro) either tonight or tomorrow.

I'm not a big fan of social media. I don't FB- creeps me out- and I keep up with some musician friends of ours on IG but have never created an account or anything. Do  you get the W30 bi-weekly emails? Melissa wrote this:

"...I talk about reintroduction as a lifelong process...I consider it “reintroduction” every single time I eat something not Whole30, even if I haven’t done a reset in months. Every time I drink a glass of wine, eat a cupcake, or enjoy white rice with my sushi, I’m paying attention.

  • How did this make me feel, physically and psychologically?
  • Are there any consequences—even small ones—that I can pick up as a pattern?
  • Based on this, is this food or drink still worth it?"

I think she must've felt some of the vibes coming from this thread.

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What a wonderful thing to have in your hip pocket, all your life, that message from your dad about the feeling of missing someone - evolving. Thank you for that - thank you to your dad for framing it so nicely. I still think it's an unfair thing, that our life spans have us losing our grandparents before we necessarily might have the maturity (speaking for myself, of course) to alight on the burning questions that arise when they are in the grave. Sigh. There's always meditation and spidey sensing them in the space between thoughts. And that's a lot. I'm grateful for that. It's been almost five years since Mom died, and I am experiencing just that - it is evolving. I feel like in my life since she died I'm finding around every corner where she is gone, not gone, gone, not gone.

I'm discovering in marriage that I am less and less romantic - and we both recognize not wanting to fall for the trap of silly Hallmark holidays. Every day is Valentine's day, right, and every day is Christmas! He is the really not-interested, stalwart one on this. My heart would jump for a V-day card, but every single day I know he loves me, so I can be happy without one. Having said that, any excuse for a delicious meal, and yes, a glass of red!!! Why not?

Ooh, I looked up cauli tortillas, oh yeah, that' looks great! It looks like the pizza crust exactly without the cheese. Do you steam the cauli and then wring out the moisture? Or do you dry pan fry the moisture out? The second option looks much easier to me. Thanks for the tip. In my search I also stumbled on using the cauli stem to spiralize chips that get deep fried. I might try oven baking...

I'm with you on social media! I was never tempted to get on FB, or even MySpace before that. I do enjoy IG but I'm limiting myself because it quickly becomes a big time waster - boob-tube kind of thing. I DO subscribe to the W30 emails, but I rarely read them...I should though, and I so appreciate the excerpt you posted about re-intros! That's a good one!

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After spending yesterday missing Mardi Gras #300, I can REALLY be thankful about how good I feel today. We would have spent the day drinking waaaaay too much beer and eating Popeye's fried chicken (YUM!!) all day. It sure is fun but gotta pay to play! My husband is so antsy waiting to get the final OK on his new job that he wanted to get out of the house for a while and go get a beer. It was a pretty day- warmer & a blue sky for one day!!- so it was nice to get out. I thought about having a drink with him but decided I really didn't want one and was happy with some soda & lime. I swear it makes me pee more than beer does! I think I WILL have my first glass of red wine tonight, though and I'm definitely going to indulge in a Negroni Saturday night before the concert. It's so wonderfully bitter but I know it's a sugar bomb, too, so I'm planning a low carb-ish day to make up for it and will totally enjoy it. 

I steam the cauli for the tortilla then wring it out. It's amazing how much water comes out of it! I've tried pan frying it to dry it out for "rice" and it always seems to overcook before it really dries out. I can't remember the proportions off-hand but it's just cauli & egg. I'll take a look at it and send it to you. Not into Hallmark holidays here either; they make me crazy. Or, as my husband says, it's on that long list of things that make me crazy ^_^

I've been thinking about my NSV's and I think it's mainly all of the little ones wrapped up in one. I just feel better! I'm sleeping a little better and hope that will continue to improve, little aches and pains are gone and my weight loss is progressing slowly but surely (finally!). I feel lighter both inside and out; more peaceful. I'm making the extra effort to have tasty meals and not just easy meals. No food guilt. No beer & wine guilt. Just being the best me I can be right now and I'm pretty excited about it.

The sky is not the limit and it never was - Meadowlily

 

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Congrats! That's so awesome - and  your words ring true and bright about being the best you! I love it. You're in such a good place, may it alllllways be so!

I woke up to a big surprise - an actual valentine card. It fits us perfectly - and it's humorous, very him, very us - after six years, a small miracle. = ) 

An interesting day....I let myself sleep in a little to mull over journal-worthy trippy/slightly disturbing dreams, but that meant I was rushed for my busiest day of the week...I packed my lunch, but didn't have time for breakfast! <insert Scream Queen-style scream, can you hear it?> so once I got to work I ate a Cliff bar and sipped some coffee, and another coffee, with the amazing, organic, expensive as shyte, just-like-homemade almond milk (no sugar!!!) our next door neighbor grocer carries...then, 3.5 hours later I ate my decent and delicious lunch, and by the time we closed up I was hungry, yes, but hey, it wasn't so bad! That's cool. The nice meal I had planned for tonight, I actually cooked on Monday, so tonight was just an easy favorite for him, and for myself the most basic thing - pork sausage sliders and a big pile of steamed broccoli with a dollop of mayo on the side and a bit of that caramel apple sauce, and a big 'ole goblet of red zin. I'm a happy cat.

I noticed this week on my hikes that I praaahhbably need more carbs! So I'll be playing with that. To be honest, when I feel best, I'm pretty lenient with myself about fat and carbs...I feel satisfied, and the weight loss is slow but slow is okay. Especially now that i'm training for Kern Canyon, I'd be wise to not chintz on the yams. 

Last night we went to the Mexican joint (also our neighbors in the little shopping center) very hungry. I ate chips, but my meal was otherwise compliant, and no G.I. issues. (carne asada tostada a la carte, no beans, sour cream or cheese, with cucumbers and whatever veg you have on hand. please!) I read that Mellissa H. asks for cucumbers to dip in salsa...might try that! 

Here's a link to Mineral King, in our "back yard", the starting point of our hike this summer:

http://www.wikiwand.com/en/Mineral_King

 

 

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Congratulations on your Valentine's card! It's the little things, isn't it? Taking care of ourselves, taking care of our marriages- neither are perfect and both take effort. I'm thankful that I have those options.

Thanks for the link. How beautiful! I've never been that far west and CA is so gigantic that I've never really figured out what is where so it's nice to be able to visualize where you are. It looks like y'all are in for a challenging but gorgeous adventure. Looking at some of that terrain, I'd have to agree that this wouldn't be the time to skimp on your yams! How do you manage food for the whole trip? Good carbs seem to be definitely in order. My sister-in-law and I are going to chat this weekend about a food plan for the BB trip. They are thinking about driving so that will make things easier. Feeding 9 adults and 1 kid will take some planning plus we all couldn't fit in one place so we are divided into two groups and staying about 20 minutes apart, I think.

I had my first glass of red wine last night. Nothing fancy but I had been looking forward to it and really savored every sip. I used a good wine glass instead of my stainless steel camping cup that I tend to always use and enjoyed it while we were fixing our V-day dinner of pork chops, sautéed rainbow chard and beets w a big glob of homemade mayo. I haven't tried mayo w steamed broccoli but that sounds really good, too. I'll have to give it a try. Leftover tacos tonight and I'm going to skip the cheese and just use sour cream to see how it treats my stomach.

Slow roll!

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Oh, a nice glass of red, what a pleasure!

It's funny, most of my life I've lived in the SF area or Monterey (2 hours south of SF)...and for ALL of my friends in those place, where I live now is a complete mystery, somewhere in the interior of the state, where is that exactly? It's all a vague blur to them. In some ways it's very unsavory. It's poor. It's polluted. But there are the mountains, and I am loving living in the mountains!

Yes, a yam worthy endeavor, these hikes! LOL. I'm not exactly sure what I'll do about food this time...it feels sacrilegious to say so here on this board, but last August, for convenience's sake, we both ate the packaged backpacker food by such companies as Mountain House. You just tear open the plastic pouch, pour in boiling water, seal it up and let it re-hydrate for a while, and presto, you have hot food. I had three months after finishing my W60 to gear up for it, and it was not a problem for me. Our *plan* was to eat three of those per day, and no snacking. That made sense. What we discovered on day-1 was that we could not tolerate lunch, for the same reason marathon runners don't stop to eat a plate of lasagna in the middle of their race. Duh, right? So this time we thought we would plan for breakfast, snack for lunch or otherwise as needed, then dinner after setting up camp. In the five days of last year's hike, eating just breakfast and dinner, we each lost 6-7 lbs....in FIVE days! And we recovered just fine! Amazing. I realize it's not a good idea to lose that much weight in such a short time, but it was an awesome trip...so given how well the pre-packaged stuff worked for us, I really thought a lot about getting an Excalibur and making my own. I have wavered back and forth about it...I already spend so much time cooking and cleaning on top of the usual schedule...at this time I think I'm too busy to do my own dehydrating, so we will probably do Mountain House again. But don't let me be a bad influence on you!

Ah, so good that you have a partner in your sister-in-law to help you with planning food! Will she and the others be supportive of the way you want to eat? It seems in theory that for a group with different preferences, there can be an overlapping with W30 and many things can be shared, yes? Remind me, are you backpacking? Or is it car-camping? Car camping is so much more convenient when it comes to food, and I find way easier to be compliant.  We do a week-long car camping trip every June, and last June, right on the heels of finishing my W60, I successfully stayed compliant with lots of frozen things so they could slow-thaw, like fish filets, cooked in foil on the coals with ghee and garlic and lemon. Gasp, that was really delicious! I also brought compliant chili that we cooked on a camping stove, and pre-sliced frittatas to warm in foil on the fire. I wanted to assemble and "cook" as little as possible since camping is such a great deal of chores, anyway, really like outdoor housekeeping, right? I am curious to learn what you will do. I wonder how roasted vegetables would do if frozen and re-heated on the coals? It's hard for me to imagine going a week without my oven-roasted brussels and bacon = )

"He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words." ~ Elbert Hubbard

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I'm embarrassed to say that I didn't know who Elbert Hubbard was. Very interesting man. Thanks. I've always loved inspiring and though-provoking quotes and that's a good one.

SO...big news! My husband turned in his resignation about an hour ago. He got the job! The waiting is over, he's excited and I'm so happy for him. I'm good with making the trip alone; it's good for me to push my boundaries. No camping :( we are staying in houses. I don't know how I'd be able to fly with camping gear anyway since we car camp. Cooking and cleaning outdoors is an adventure unto itself sometimes. Do you have a vacuum sealer? We'll make chili or stew and just boil-n-bag sometimes. Then you have the leftover pot of hot water to clean your bowls with but no dirty, greasy pot. I freeze roasted veggies all the time and they reheat well but I'm using the nuker at work and not an open fire! I think they would still be fine with a quick pan-fry over the coals just to heat them up. I've pre-made hashes too and those work really well.

My Excalibur came with a big book with recipes and suggestions and there's a whole section on making meals but it made me tired and totally overwhelmed just reading it. Since you recover so well after your hiking trips, I think I'd do what I could to bring complaint snacks & stuff but not stress over the pre-packaged meals. I love reading stories of people's through-hikes and have seen where they estimate burning 5-6000 calories per day so it's not surprising that ya'll lose that much weight in 5 days.

Our group will have diets at each extreme and I'll be somewhere in the middle, LOL!! My brother and sister-in-law eat paleo but for the last several months have been doing the one-meal-a-day thing. They cherry-pick the paleo rules they adhere to but are trying to stay in ketosis most of the time, I think. But they drink diet coke with their Jack Daniels :(, eat crappy fats and eat no carb dense veg at all. Everyone else on the trip eats SAD. The three of us will most likely be doing most of the cooking so that works out really well. I'm guessing everyone will be fending for themselves for breakfast and I'll probably be living off of various bars-EPIC, Rx, Primal for breakfasts and maybe some lunches but I'm going to try to get more creative than that-looking forward to a brain storming session this weekend.

Have a fabulous weekend! We're going to be busy trying to stay dry-again. Tommy Emmanuel & Jake Shimabukuru concert tomorrow night. We've seen them both before but not together. If you want to have your mind blown by a ukulele, check out Jake on YouTube!

Woooohoooo!

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