Start Date: December 1st

[hollysmokes]

Lists- yes! I had to graduate from post-it notes to real sheets of paper  I'm getting there! Hair is cut, clothes are washed, new hard side suitcase that my husband insisted that I needed has arrived, toiletries are amassed and everything is in a giant pile against the wall in the bedroom. I have 2 quick stops on my way home tonight and then packing will begin in earnest. My little kitty will freak out and go hide in the attic and the big, crazy one will try to sleep in my suitcase. He'll probably leave a tick in there for me as a going away present. I just pulled the first one of the season off of my husband's back last night. At least it was a tiny seed tick and not a big nasty one but itchy nonetheless- makes me itch just thinking about it. I do not react well to tick bites; they itch like the devil and take weeks to heal. They make me itch just crawling on me so I guess there's an allergy component there.

That jalapeno beef bone broth sounds delicious! The others sound a little...uh...different but are probably really good. I grabbed a bunch of the bars for my trip. The bacon is less weird than the others and I got the sriracha chicken without tasting it first so I'm keeping my fingers crossed on that one. It seems so odd that I'm planning such non-compliant non-meals but at least I'm using compliant ingredients and it's better than eating SAD.

The corned beef came out pretty good. I thought it needed more salt and, after cooking it forever at a low temp to make it tender, it wound up being a little overcooked and dry so I saved some of the braising liquid to moisten it with. Still pretty tasty though and, since it was a 5 lb piece of brisket, it's going to last a while. I'm still playing with the cooking method for corned beef. When I was a kid, my mother always baked them and that's still my favorite way to cook it but it tends to be too salty. Most people braise them in water with some additional pickling spice added to it so it leaches out some of the salt that was used during the curing process but I find the flavor to be watered down as well. It's all my mother's fault! I'll have to tell her!

Thanks for keeping me W30 grounded during the chaos. It's being a good, solid common thread that I can rely on. I'm going to miss it while I'm gone. You always bring a smile to my face.

[LadyLisbette]

Oh! I still haven't learned to look for our thread spilling over onto a new page...I'm sorry I missed this before you left. Well, I think you are en route right now, so wishing you and your new suit case a safe journey, and a memorable, wonderful time! Oh, it's mutual, the grounding and camaraderie, thank you as well! = )

I'll miss the ongoiing conversation, too, but just this morning I made a giant pot of adlibbed hash that I know will keep me safe and sound at least through the weekend, so there are no excuses for going off the rails!

Happy trails!

[hollysmokes]

I'm baaaack! The trip was awesome but I am so glad to be home. I had no cell service or wifi so I couldn't talk to my husband at all. I was able to let him know I was OK when I started the last driving leg heading down there and that was it! Definitely pushed me out of my comfort zone being out there alone and cut-off but I found our house in spite of the atrocious directions I was given and all was good. Oddly, I was more nervous about the drive back to the airport because I was so worried about miscalculating the time and missing my flight. It all worked out, though.

I am eating adlibbed hash right now and, boy do I need vegetables in my life right now. I feel veggie deprived! I mostly lived off of Epic bars and Primal bars with a big handful of berries for breakfast & lunch. Dinner was real food but still light on veg. Aside from our margarita ritual every afternoon I didn't fly off the rails too badly. I had tacos or chips and salsa most days but they were fabulous and homemade so it was a conscious decision and not a face plant. I avoided the brisket slathered in Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ sauce, turned down homemade caramels, French fries and a few other things I deemed not worthy. I think I lost a couple of pounds, too!

I am ready for life to settle down now. I got my hash made yesterday and used some of Mel's Rogan Josh seasoning in it then made a big batch of chicken salad (NOT curried for a little variety) so my lunches and breakfasts are done for the week-yaaaay! I think I'm getting caught up on sleep; I didn't sleep more than 4-5 hours a night in Texas but have been doing pretty well since I got back. I think I've stopped leaking, too. It was pretty comical; everything I touched leaked! On the trip down, my water bottle leaked in my backpack and got my trail guidebook wet. Then my camelback leaked on my bed plus I spilled coffee down the front of myself almost every day and finally realized that the French press lid on my cup wasn't seating properly.

 I am definitely feeling more in the groove riding my own bike this time than I did last time and it feels like it's getting easier. Everything is still a decision but the decisions are becoming second nature. Cool beans!

Happy April! Did you decide to do another W30 or just keep riding your bike?

[LadyLisbette]

Hi Holly!! Welcome back, so glad you had an awesome time! And the logistics all went well in spite of being cut off...that's great! Your hubbie must be happy you're home, too. Ah, to sleep per chance to dream. Sigh for a good night of sleep. 

I laughed out loud about leaking and spilling...my college bestie and I called each other spill sistahs! It sounds like you faced challenges and temptations with firm resolve and self respect, and enjoyed yourself. How was the hiking? Did you turn in early, or stay up late and hang with the night owls? Did you learn to like the Epic bars, or find a favorite flavor? I had their turkey cranberry almond bar yesterday and it wasn't so bad...oh, and the beef jalapeño broth was good *and* salty as promised!

This is week 3 for me - I'm not doing a true W30 but am keeping the bike on the path, if you know what I mean! I'm taking a page from your book, and really easing up on the starchy carbs (am I slow to understand this or what?) just every other day or two days. Once I went 4 or 5 days without any yams, and when I did roast some I was shocked how sweet they tasted! I had an allergy flare up 2 weeks ago (it is that time of year!) so I'm back on OTC meds as needed, but will try stopping them in a week or so as the W30 eating will likely shore up the immunity, so we'll see. I've been hiking again but taking it easy, and using 2 ibuprofens with morning and evening meal and that seems to be helping, and the plan is short term with those NSAIDS just to get me through my training....I'm working up to a steep six-miler and will evaluate if I need to see an ortho after that - if there is pain, discomfort, etc...and hubs understands that next weekend I will *not* be joining him on an overnight hike if my knee is squawking at all (he whined a bit in push back about my hesitation and conservative approach as he does not want to go without me)....I'm also adding glucosamine and using collagen peptides and/or bone broth twice a day -- thanks for pointing me in that direction! I *love* my homemade bone broth! Watch it jiggle.....So I feel like I'm doing everything in my power, and more will be revealed, right? I've been surprised to feel a noticeable increase in arthritic pain in my fingers in the last couple of weeks, so good that I'm on my game, and hope to see that abate, and trust that it will.

So glad you're in a good groove, I'm feeling that, too...the biggest transgression in these three weeks was two nights ago, we knew the water was turned off in our water district, and it was our wedding anniversary so we went to the fancy place in town and had a nice meal. I had two glasses of wine, most of the sour cream on my baked potato, and shared a few bites of dessert...I suffered a little GI distress, but it was totally worth it, and I had no cravings the next day, and it was back to the bike...

[hollysmokes]

Ah, Lisbette it's so good to "hear" your voice!

Hiking was great!  It wasn't intentional but it looked like I have a thing for canyons- three canyons in three days plus a canoeing trip down another canyon.  I was going to go by myself on the first day because the group was splitting up. Some were going shopping (ugh!) and some were doing a long, strenuous hike that involved a vertical rock climb. The hike I had my eye on was in between those extremes. My SIL decided to come with me and she was a great hiking partner. We had an up-close-and-personal encounter with a deer out for his breakfast (cool!) and found a tree full of mountain lion scratches (decidedly NOT cool). The canoeing trip was the method we chose to get my dad's ashes where he wanted them to be placed. I had never been to Big Bend so it was really great to be in a place that meant so much to him and it was a huge relief to his wife (even though they were married for 37 years I have a hard time calling her my stepmother since she's only 4 yrs older than I am ) to fulfill her promise to him. The family time was really great. We had a fabulous deck and watched the sunset every day from there then had dinner a few adult beverages under an amazing star display but no crazy partying.

I hope your knees allow you to go on that overnighter; that would be fun. It sounds like you're doing everything right to try to get them to settle down. Yeah- chicken jello! It's great stuff. I had some in a pint jar in the fridge and had to pry it out to plop it in the skillet for some sauce for chicken & broccoli. I added a little Parm so it was kinda like the chicken divan that my grandmother used to make. I'm so glad to be eating real food. I'm glad I had the bars so at least I was eating good ingredients. I thought I liked the bacon Epic bars but decided they were too squishy. The lamb was awful. I think my favorite was the chicken sriracha; it was drier than the rest and had a nice spice to it. The turkey is probably my next favorite.

I started reading the thread on the forum "the crazy things people say". It's in the "friends and family" section of "Life after W30". I thought it would be amusing but now it's being more of a bummer to realize how many people react so poorly to our decision to eat whole, real, nutrient dense food instead of food-like substances. I've heard almost all of them but there are a couple of doozies in there and it's so SAD.

Happy Anniversary! It sounds like ya'll had a great evening. "Totally worth it" is the key!

[LadyLisbette]

Howdy! Makes sense you would prefer the chicken sriracha bar, my Cuban/Cajun friend! That one is in my stash, so I will try it soon! The hiking sounds really awesome, and discovering your love of canyons, aahh. Glad you had a good partner to hike with. Ooh, sign of big cats! That's exciting. I admire your family ritual of placing your dad's ashes via the canoe trip, as a group. My family is non-intentionally aka by way of avoidance and denial maybe, taking on a strange tradition of holding on to ashes. Mom used to carry her dear daddy's ashes around in the back of the car (since 1991) and talk to him! Since her death, my stepdad has inherited Grandad's ashes, has Mom's ashes, and two family dogs. It doesn't bother me too much but I do notice a vicarious sigh of relief on your behalf!

As for the bummer stuff that people say, no wonder we prefer to keep it to ourselves! You know what, we all have access to an awful lot of information, and we all get to be responsible for our choices. I am not tempted to evangelize at all, but I was disappointed last winter that my good friends were not more supportive or interested - I could see their set opinions even though they were, for the most part, politely keeping it to themselves. That taught me to keep mum and mind my own business, holding steady the course. But the more I learn and deepen my understanding of my own process, I want to slyly ease my hubs off the crap in a way he won't notice! Anyway, oh dear Holly, if it bums you out, cease and follow your joy, or at least something neutral that won't suck the joy out.

That reminds me, I'm wanting to stop drinking wine, as of last night, I decided (more below). And there's that elderly gentleman who is my oral history friend? He likes to serve wine when I visit. I've shared a drink with him now on three visits, and I don't want to do that anymore. Wine is not good for me!!! What should I tell him? I'm thinking, "oh, no thank you, I'm taking a break from the good stuff for awhile..." and when he's disappointed just ask for water in a wine glass, and carry on? He won't like it, but tough beans, right??

Okay, I'm reading a book that is really stunning me, and it dovetails completely with W30, and is giving me so much hope (and clarity, from a new angle about many things, and the wine I mentioned. Yeah, no more wine)..... https://www.drbredesen.com/protocoloverview

Have you heard of it? I'm in early chapters, but it's inspiring me and reinforcing all we have learned and are practicing here + + + more science and brain chemistry.

Meanwhile, I should use this coffee high to get out and hike before it rains! Thanks for the encouragement. Yesterday's hike was wonderful, and I ran into friends on the trail so it was shorter, but the socializing is good, too. I saw a coyote dashing across the trail and up the hill, followed by a hiker's dog who promptly lost his scent. LOL. After the hike I spent an hour or more doing self-prescribed PT exercises and some yoga. I needed that. I feel so much better already, and ever hopeful.

Happy Friday!! 

[hollysmokes]

I think that sigh of relief was for my dad's wife. She's a terrific lady and we're all worried about/for her. You could almost see the burden of her promise to him lift off of her shoulders. Years ago I had a friend who kept her grandfather's ashes on her mantle and she would decorate him at all of the holidays. I thought that was a bit odd but it made her feel good so who was I to criticize? When I met my husband, he had a 5 year old Chow who was one of the coolest dogs ever. Ten years later, right before Katrina she had melanoma in her mouth that was inoperable and we had her cremated. When I had to evacuate, I tried to grab everything that was important that couldn't be replaced and her ashes were one of the things I brought. She drove to TN with me after they kicked us out of the hospital where I worked and is now in a beautiful pottery urn by our fireplace. I don't think I want to start a collection, though!

Maybe if you explain to your friend that wine hasn't been being good to you he might understand and not be too disappointed. I know it's not the same as sharing a bottle of wine but what if you brought something sparkly to drink so it looks more festive? It's such a big part of where we are in this process to realize that something is not being kind to our bodies or our minds then take steps to change it. I haven't heard of Bredesen or the book but I'll have to check it out. Thanks for the tip.

OK- this is HUGE! I'm calling it a NSV. My husband talked to his daughter yesterday and found out she had a really bad reaction to something, probably food- enormous bloating, felt terrible. She's a Spartan racer, eats well, cooks everything from scratch, home schools their 2 kids and is just a really cool, kind person. The first thing she did was W30 to try to eliminate as much as possible and get her body to settle down. My husbands reaction was to say that at least she was smart about it and went to the W30! I almost fell out of the car when he said that. He's read Grain Brain and he understands what I'm doing and why but he won't join me. I know he knows he should cut out all of that sugar/grain but he can't actually bring himself to do it. He's seen how much better I am without all of it and I've noticed that there have been no snarky comments about not being able to go out to eat because of the way I eat. It was pretty sweet hearing him give so much credit to W30! I've been hoping that if I keep enough variety in our meals, he'll reach for the rice, pasta and bread less often. It works when we eat at home but when he eats out, he goes for sandwiches, burgers, pasta and, unfortunately, right now he has to go in to the office and they have a very convenient cafeteria full of SAD that he is eating for breakfast and lunch. Maybe this episode with his daughter will help convince him to change his ways. She's going to order ISWF, I'm going to send her some recipes and I turned her on to Nomnom and Mel Joulwan for recipe ideas as well as Sarah Ballantyne for some help with AIP since it looks like she might need to go that route. She was already gluten & sugar free but relied heavily on protein powder and dairy. Now she's trying to figure out what to cook that's grain free, dairy free and no tomatoes either. She's smart she'll get it and, of course I told her that the forums are a great resource  

[LadyLisbette]

Are you a fan of Jim Jarmusch? Reading the endearing stories of how we, you, our people deal with ashes got me thinking about Night on Earth, have you seen it?  – taxi cab stories all over the world during the same evening. It occurs to me that relationships with ashes/remains could be a charming set of vignettes. 

I'm growing more comfortable with declining the sharing of wine - it will be a moment to get past. I could be disarming in a TMI way and say something about the unbearable hot flashes. That would be a truth if an exaggerated one that he could not argue with LOL!

Wow, your husband validated you completely with the W30 way of life! That's a great story, and yes, a heck of a NSV!!! He must admire and respect you a lot. As he should! His daughter has a great ally and cheerleader in you. I imagine it will be fun to accompany her on the journey and have a new person in your own family to share recipes and ideas with. Awesome! Seems like she is at an advantage for having already done so many life-giving eliminations. Amazing how adaptable we can be. Meanwhile, I'll bet if you keep holding space the way you are, and his daughter in her process, too, he'll come around! Does she live nearby?

I keep thinking, how could our husbands resist our W30 cooking, and not only that, but not fall all over themselves in gratitude for our willingness to do the cooking, etc, so that they could give it a shot, and see how they like the way they feel, etc etc etc? But I also realize that not only do we (they) have to be ready and willing, but we take for granted what is right under our noses. For example I lived in San Francisco with Alcatraz in plain sight and a friend who gave private V.I.P tours, and I never even wanted to go until I was moving away. So, could that be it?

How did it go in Big Bend in terms of support for W30? Or did you keep everything close to your vest like we did in December? I wonder if you got funny comments, and is that why you were reading up on the silly things people say?

Today's Sunday cook-up was all about vegetables. Apparently cruciferous vegetables are especially good and detoxifying for the brain. I made a big pot of cauli mash to go with the slow cooker chuck roast  I made last night. I made gravy out of the juices and organized the dish. I roasted brussels sprouts with bacon. Nearly burning them, just the way I like it! Then I spiral sliced six big zucs....that doesn't look like much, but it wiped me out. We spent the rest of today getting our backpacking gear out and making lists, etc. My heart rushed as I remembered just how much I love. my. backpack. It's so awesome! And it's all packed and ready for me to go on a big 6 or 7 miler tomorrow morning with my backpack loaded AND my new trekking poles I bought at (beloved, beloved I say) REI yesterday. I'm very excited and hopeful. It's packed with every single item I will need if I do in fact go on our two-nighter next weekend, so the weight is on the money. I really hope to make it. If I join him it will be a 13-mile hike across three creeks (if they are safe to cross at that time). We'll set up camp, and spend the second day day hiking to Redwood Meadow, the most remote sequoia grove in Sequoia Nat'l Park, scarcely visited, and described as exuding a witchy and ancient wisdom when the sun sets. Sounds good, eh? Fingers crossed!! So far, just from getting one solid week of optimal exercise and stretching, I feel worlds better. So I am hopeful! Sleepy, going to bed early!

[hollysmokes]

I'm so excited for you! Redwood Meadow sounds amazing and I'm betting your hike this morning is going to accomplish everything you want it to; I'll be thinking about you all morning. Have fun breaking in those new poles; I can't wait to hear how it went. I took a pic of my new hiking boots after they had been thoroughly covered in West Texas dirt! I brought them home that way, too. I never clean off my boots so, in my head, I feel like I'm carrying a little piece of everywhere we've been along with me. Goofy, I know. Do y'all have a backup plan in case those creeks aren't passable?

I didn't get any pushback about my diet at all. I think there were enough people with a pretty broad spectrum of eating so everybody just did their own thing and no one complained, berated or made fun of any one's eating plan. I think it also helped that everyone was responsible for their own breakfasts and lunches. On the home front, my husband actually helps with the cooking most nights. After I got hurt and couldn't do anything, he apologized and said he didn't realize how much I was doing and how little he was helping. He said that if one good thing could come out of me getting hurt, it would be that he wouldn't slack off and would pitch in more. And he has! It's so much nicer to cook together, especially when you're tired and don't feel like cooking. I wish his daughter did live nearby. She's in LA. Not your LA, our LA as in Lower Alabama  so she's 8-9 hours away. She's a little overwhelmed right now because she is still having food reactions but I think she has a plan to W30 and eliminate nightshades. I sent her ISWF and Sarah Ballantyne's book so hopefully she'll get them today or tomorrow. Right now I'm her source for "Can I have this?" and I feel bad that I have to keep telling her "nope" on most of it (corn, tortillas made from flax).

My Sunday cook-up was all about cleaning out the fridge! I had little bits of all kinds of stuff so my breakfast casserole has mushrooms, kale, orange bell pepper, the pieces of turnips left from spiralizing and country ham. Yes, I spiralized! I've had sauerruben (like kraut but made w turnips instead of cabbage) on my to-do list since the fall and I kept putting it off. I had several garbage bags full of turnips from the garden and the last dozen or so were starting to look a little tired. I finally bit the bullet and did it. As they say on TV, ...and it really, really worked! Three pounds of turnips filled a half gallon jar so they are happily fermenting away and I used all of the little leftover scraps for my breakfast. It doesn't sound like much but I was whipped after that. We're going to put some beef ribs on the smoker this afternoon. I've only done pork ribs so I'm looking forward to these. Your roast and cauli mash sounds delicious; I could definitely go for some of that. It's been pretty cold here but is supposed to warm up some this week- AND not rain for a giant change of pace.

Enjoy your hike. Here's to wishing you happy knees!

[LadyLisbette]

We're down one at work this week (strep throat, agh!) so I'm doing double duty, but really rocking the hikes! Your good wishes received, thanks! Yesterday and today I was out the door at 630 - yesterday I hiked for 2.5 hours, then worked a long day, and I had a late lunch so went to bed early for a long fast...I know this is controversial, 2 meals instead of three (plus a couple of eggs for a pre work out snack, I wake up so hungry!), but it seems to be okay. Then this morning I was out at 630 again with a friend for a 90 minute hike. Fun! I'm liking the poles, eating humble pie all the way after so many years of dissing them. Ha. I have adapted chi walking and chi running for backpacking all these years, and now I'm adding that in with the poles, exploring energy efficiency, and just how this works, using the whole body, distributing weight differently, etc...then I've been coming home for my self PT exercises for the knee and yoga, and a little sitting. I'm amazed by how much progress I seem to be making, and it's really cheering me up. I think it's a green light for this weekend's 2-nighter. Now, what do you think, I'm taking ibuprofen, 2 at every meal...I wonder how long I should keep this up before weaning off to see how my knees to do with this rate of activity? Certainly after the trip...any ideas?

I love what you said about your hiking boots - a badge of honor all that wonderful dirt! I'm enjoying seeing the way mine are getting broken in and I wade through streams on these day hikes as often as possible!

I'm happy for you that your hubs has that attitude and helps you, and has that perspective. Very, very endearing! Ooh, the sauerruben sounds heavenly! Your garden is so productive! What will you grow this year?

My friend from this morning's hiking is doing keto so we had some fun comparing notes on how awesome it feels no to be a slave to cravings. Her partner has paleo books, and she has dabbled in it. They're super motivated right now because his pre-diabetes has fully turned into diabetes. On keto he's quickly lost 30 lbs. I turned her on the the last of last week's mayo as I'm about to make a new batch, and loaned her ISWF - not trying to convert her to W30 but share the nutrition info and we'll see. 

Sadly pressed for time - this week will be a marathon, and breakfast calls -- thanks so much for the encouragement about my knee, it seems to be going well, and even though I'm pressed for time I let myself do a second set of seated spinal twists/forward bends and on the second set I observed a huge increase in flexibility.

Sweet day! L.

[hollysmokes]

Wow! Sounds like you're killing it! I had to look up chi walking; I had never heard of it and now I think I need to look into it some more so thanks. When do you leave for your weekend trip? I'm so excited for you. It sounds like  you're doing everything right for your knee. Not sure what the best way to decrease your ibuprofen dose would be. 1 instead of 2 at every meal or take 2 but less frequently? I tend to think the latter might be better because if you decrease each dose, it might be below therapeutic level.

I'm considering doing another W30 with my husband's daughter starting this Sunday, the 15th and, stupidly, the thing holding me back is two parties the weekend of the 21st. Saturday is a big picking party (usually all night) where we do the food and another friend brews the beer. Sunday is a big crawfish boil with music and, of course...beer.  I'm most of the way into convincing myself that I should go for it. I was thinking about a post I saw elsewhere in the forum about someone planning several back-to-back W30's but with a different emphasis on each- sleep, exercise, meditation. I've been eating mostly compliant anyway so I'm thinking that focusing on exercise would be most beneficial for me since I have totally dropped that ball. I can support her with the food part of W30 and she can support me with the workout/moving part. It would get my weight loss going and probably improve my sleep as well. Can you tell I'm still trying to talk myself into it??! I'm most of the way there and your hiking, PT, yoga plan is inspiring.

I hope your marathon week is calming down as you get ready to experience that sequoia grove. I have fabulous images in my head that, I'm sure, are nothing compared to the real thing.

[LadyLisbette]

Oh wow, your gatherings do sound really tempting. Not just food and friends, but home brew and ritual of picking, too.It would be hard to start a program with those parties right at the beginning...and yet with your experience, if you chose to, you could do it, absolutely...the question is, do you want to? Sounds like you're weighing the pros and cons of when to start, and whether to start on the same day as your hubs' daughter. Pausing to consider before making the commitment is not stupid in my estimation. As my mother used to say, it's not becoming of great spirits to say such things about themselves. As a list maker, are you one to list out the pros and cons?  

These gatherings are a wilderness...tonight the non-profit I'm a part of was honored at a big event, and the party included full bar, barbecue, cake....I ate a late lunch before going so I wouldn't be hungry. I ate the roast pork and coleslaw and they were both *loaded* with sugar! My how my palate has changed. I planned to not drink alcohol but caved to a small glass of wine. That was *the* treat  –––> NO cake. I told myself I needed the wine to get on stage and make some remarks to the assembled crowd. Could I have taken the mic without wine? Probably...suddenly the wine is one thing I want to let go of and more will be revealed there...If I had been doing a W30 that sweet slaw and marinade/sauce would have ruined it. I would have had to just not eat anything at all!

It occurs to me that stressing about the wine is probably as damaging or moreso than the wine itself, yes? I let it go.

As for doing a W30 with a special emphasis, oh gosh, that sounds really smart and reasonable. Yes! I will join you absolutely in the focus on exercise even though I'm not taking on an actual W30...I definitely feel a commitment to this momentum! 

Sigh! I finished my marathon week with today as the grand finale. Now it's time for a good sleep, and an early alarm. My backpack is loaded and ready to go! We'll leave the house about 6am, drive 30 minutes and then hike 3.5 mi to the first of three crossings. If it's not passable we'll just camp there and come home on Sat. morning. If all three crossings are passable we'll camp after the 3rd one (13 mi), sleep, and then day hike to that magical grove (just 1.5 mi from camp) on Saturday, spend our second night, and come home on Sunday. I'm about as ready as I can be, and it will give me a little fitness boost if we get to go all the way in. It will be our first time with our new gravity water system. I'll carry the squeeze bottle filter as a back up. Putting it down here it occurs to me that Saturday will be a leisure day and I should bring a journal or book. Okay, I'd better get to sleep....

"see you" next week! 

 

[hollysmokes]

I'm dying to hear all about your weekend! Did y'all make it all the way in? How did your knee behave?

Well, today is Day 2. I decided to go for it. I had a not-great day yesterday but it had nothing to do with W30- missing cat, the other cat broke my beautiful ceramic water glass, feeling overwhelmed getting food ready for the big party next weekend, blah, blah, blah. I got over it. I got my breakfasts and a couple of lunches done, 9 lbs of pork seasoned to make a triple batch of sausage, hair washed and did a yoga/dance/fitness thing that was fun and finally perked up. Missing cat  he does it every year for his birthday. How does he know? He turned 15 Wednesday and we haven't seen him since. He always shows back up but I know eventually he won't.

You know, I'm thinking that sweet slaw and sauce is probably worse than one small glass of wine so I'm glad you were able to let it go. One of the good things about taking care of the food for Saturday is that I know I'll be able to eat. Slow roasted pork, greens, sausage (with enough left over to have some in the freezer). I can't get andouille sausage and it's crazy expensive to ship it here so I've been trying to replicate it and am getting close. My last batch was a little too salty and I thought the garlic was a little harsh so I cut both back this time. We'll stuff them tomorrow night and smoke them on Wednesday. The two whole pork shoulders, about 30 lbs worth, will roast all day Thursday while we're at work. I forgot that I should have gone to the farmer's market to get greens Saturday so I may be in a jam for those- that was one of the things I was stressing over yesterday. If I can't find any, I'll probably just do a big kale salad or something like that. There will be lots of other stuff that I probably won't be able to eat but one year somebody brought some wonderful stuffed mushrooms and I'm hoping for more of those.

Did you see Melissa's post about the Spindrift sodas? I picked some up at Costco and tried one yesterday. Pretty yummy. I'm not a LeCroix fan; I think they have a funny fake sugar-like aftertaste but I like these and it'll give me something interesting to sip on. I could only get grapefruit, lemon and raspberry-lime but I might try Target to see if they have any of the more fun flavors- not expecting to be crazy about the lemon.

I have a month of work-outs that my husband's daughter planned for me. I'll do the first one this afternoon when I get home. I know I won't be able to complete everything she has set up for me but I'm going to give it my best and see how much I can improve in one short month. She's so up-beat. I had to send her a bunch of pics for the initial assessment and she said I looked awesome. I know I'm 20 lbs lighter than the last time she saw me but that's still not the word I would have used to describe those pics! I'm ready to release more fat into the universe so I'm keeping my fingers crossed and staying away from the scale.

[LadyLisbette]

Oh my gosh, how does the cat know that walkabout is a rite of passage that comes around the birthday? That is amazing. And so worrisome for you! Cat, come home! I sympathize with you = |

Happy new W30 to you! I'm proud of you for taking it on, and doing all you are doing to be ready for Saturday's festivities – and that is a *lot* of doing. Makes my mouth water just reading about it. As usual I'm so impressed with your cooking, and in this case the sausage making. Have you ever thought of writing a blog? Mel J was saying recently it's like having a dragon that is always hungry, and while I wouldn't wish that on you, you have so much to offer. Can't wait to hear about all the new exercise, too, so life affirming! 

Speaking of life affirming, I have lots of good news! (warning, wordy trip report here)

Our trip was wonderful, more than I expected. I feel more in love with backpacking than ever, and can't wait to get out there again. I was cautious with the knees (esp the left)  on the first day and really getting the feel for the poles as the day hikes didn't really offer much rough, or rocky terrain. What I discovered was that my knees seem to be fine! They got a little fatigued by the end of the day, and I also experienced a little no-too-unpleasant muscle soreness which is to be expected. And as for weaning off the NSAIDS, I inadvertently did that, too, on our hike. On the 2nd day I forgot to take two at dinner, and in the morning I was just peachy, no problem. I almost can't believe it, but I am attributing it my knees having needed exercise and stretching, and a little more time. Maybe this is where the rubber hits the road with aging, too? All these months since last August I have grieved, as I may have mentioned, my inability to squat down comfortably and stand up without using my arm strength. Slowly and carefully on this trip I was able to squat down completely and stand up on my own again. I'm not entirely as strong as last summer, but I see more strength in my future if I keep doing what I'm doing! 

We always learn a lot on these trips, and this time it was largely about crossings. (Last summer we feel it was only by divine intervention that there was no misfortune with one particular crossing after a big wet winter and a very full river. As you may know, it's very hard to judge, even if the water is clear and you can see the rocks, how slippery are the rocks, how strong is the current, how deep is the water any distance away. Hubs had a stick, and I had nothing, just my two legs and some nerve. I am patient, though, so I took my time but it was downright terrifying, and looking back on it gives us a chill. People die doing what we did.  The water was well over my knees, a classic no-no, I know that now. We knew a thing or two, but we know so much better now!) Anyway, we had 4 serious crossings, and multiple minor streams. My husband tends to be impatient and impulsive. He is learning to slow down. He took a dump on the first (shallow but wide) crossing but no serious injuries. With a serious crossing he now waits for me and we discuss all the options, rest up, and make a careful decision about how to proceed, if at all. The 2nd of the 4 was a little dicey. But I had my poles! That helped, but one of them broke in half in the middle of the crossing while rock hopping (fortunately I was able to recover the severed piece and pack it out). Then there was a big tree branch with lots of foliage blocking the way. I watched my long-legged mate climb over the bendy branches. I'm 5'5 with short legs, and limber, but not so sure about repeating his move. A bit encouraged with my new ability to squat down, I tried to squat down under it and lift the branches over my pack. I got stuck. I miscalculated the bulk of the pack, and noticed that it was going to be hard to stand up with all that weight. Hubs came back and lifted the branches, and I pushed myself up slowly with my hands and easily moved past him and along to the other side. Whew. A few miles later we came to the 3d of the 4 crossings and evaluated. We had three choices. We decided to put on our water shoes and butt-scoot across a dry log, and could then use the rocks to toe push as an assist as we scooted across, facing upstream, a roaring waterfall a few feet behind us. When we came ashore I jumped around shouting, "I feel safe! That was fun!!" absurdly, and that was a highlight of the trip for me. Ah, safety! Then to the 4th crossing - there was a big sturdy bridge!

We set up camp for the night, and in the morning set out to the magic grove, only to discover way better camp sites just up the way. We were tired. We got about half way there, saw some beautiful glimpses of the snowy Great Western Divide, saw how the trail went around a ridge to the fabled trees, and decided to try again another time, and turn around, and use our energy and time to move our camp to the better, way more comfortable site. Once set up we gathered up the elements of a nice fire, and rested. I got to read my book. We slept deeply and made another fire in the morning and took our pokey time breaking down camp, with an uneventful return. That dicey crossing with the branches had me worried, but we got through just fine.

He needs new hiking boots with better tread, I need new poles, we've already made our selections. It's a wonderland up there. Climbing up into new eco-zones, with views like something out of Lord of the Rings. We're so lucky to live here.

When we got home, I would have been happy to eat leftovers, but the hubs wanted, uncharacteristically, to clean up and go to the fancy joint. I had rack of lamb (with a little weird but worth it mint jelly that always reminds my of Grandma), green beans, potato with the sour cream scraped off, and a salad with oil and vinegar on the side, passing on any alcohol. 

I feel such an amazing fitness boost and momentum now. A few people even remarked yesterday. I must be doing something right, so I'm going to keep it up!! I'm a little over a year from my first W30 and I can see how it has changed my life, and progress is slow and steady. Steady the course!

 

[hollysmokes]

A wonderland. Fabled trees. Life affirming. How amazing! So good to hear that all of the careful work that you've put into your knees has paid off; you have to be relieved!  Ah, squatting. I'm still hoping to get there and actually I'm working on it instead of just hoping (THAT was never going to work!) Those crossings sound slightly terrifying but pretty cool that y'all have a good plan for dealing with them safely. When we were in BB, my brother was talking about a previous trip there when they had to carry a friend out that hurt himself doing something young, male and stupid. What did you decide to do for meals/snacks? You will be SO rocking it by the time your big trip comes up!

What are you looking for in your new poles? I've browsed through them but there are so many that I get overwhelmed. Aside from price and collapsible vs not, all I can do is read the reviews. I guess going to REI and talking to a real person would probably be a good idea. Does your long-legged hubby hike at a different pace than you do? Mine made a nasty comment about my slower pace being a problem and now I'm so self-conscious about it that I don't want to hike with him because I'm a "problem". Whenever I've hiked with others or a group, I always took it for granted that everyone hikes at their own pace and pausing periodically for others to catch up was part of the deal- and no big deal. That comment was a bit of a blow.

Isn't it amazing to look back at W30 changes and progress? Give yourself a major pat on the back! My Mom was congratulating me on starting another W30 but, aside from abstaining from some adult beverages, I barely had to change anything. I'm loving that it's giving me the freedom to concentrate on strength, stamina and body composition. I know I'm feeding my body well and now I will train it well. Over the years, as my mother has aged and confronted various ailments and limitations ( she's almost 80 but is doing really well over all) I have tried to look at myself and address those same issues so I can be proactive and not have to have hammertoe repairs or pelvic prolapse, for example. That is all well and good but it's time to move on. Like you say, progress is slow and steady but it is progress and I'm good with slow and steady. You are definitely "doing something right".

Meadowlily- The sky is not the limit and it never was.

 

 

[LadyLisbette]

Ooh, I just got my shingles vaccine (weird, I know, but I have had several outbreaks starting when I was 19!) and I don't know if it's related or not but I have body aches and a fever. My spirit wants to reply to your post, but my body is insisting on bed and sleep = ( more soon I hope!

[hollysmokes]

Ohhh I'm so sorry. Not weird. We have a friend that is still recovering from a terrible case of shingles. I told my hubby that he needs to get the vaccine. I, on the other hand, have never had chicken pox and got the chicken pox vaccine that they give kids before they even knew if it worked in adults. It turns out that it is effective-yay! It's a really serious infection if you get it as an adult. I so hope you feel better soon and it's just a reaction to the vaccine that will quickly pass.

I forgot, in response to your blogging comment, been there, done that! It's kind of a weird, wild thing but I was pretty proud of it. I think it was 2012-ish and I found out about this competition called Charcutapalooza. It was to be based off of the book Charcuterie by Michael Ruhlman and Bryan Polcyn and there would be a different charcuterie challenge each month taken from a section of the book. Contestants had to make something from the monthly challenge then blog about what you did with it (not just about the recipe that was already in Charcuterie) complete with pictures and recipes. If you got your blog post submitted by the deadline each month AND completed all 12 challenges, you went into consideration for the grand prize- a trip to France with all kinds of charcuterie-oriented events. Out of 400-some odd contestants, only 14 qualified for the grand prize and I was one of them! I didn't expect to win but I thought I would come in the top few- but no. I got over it- I was pretty thrilled that I did it.  I think that was the biggest commitment I had ever made (you know, besides the whole marriage thing!). It was a crazy year! We NEVER sat down to eat without having to take pictures first. After it was over, I was kinda at loose ends for a while because it had sucked up SO much time and energy plus I couldn't think of anything to write about because I had been so focused on the task at hand. It served me well, though. I make my own bacon (easy peasy!!), lots of sausages and some other crazy things. Homemade hotdogs ROCK (but are a pain in the patooty to make)!! I'll never eat store-bought bratwurst again but they have cream in them so off limits for another 25 days  That was one of the things I used to reintro dairy after my W60.

Crazy!

Feel better.

[LadyLisbette]

This time we took Mountain House type stuff for meals, and Cliff bars for snacking. It's not ideal, I realize, but it did the job. The first day out I ate a pre-work out meal before leaving the house, a couple of boiled eggs with coconut aminos. It didn't hold me long, and I got hungry, so I ate a bar (tastes like a candy bar at this point) and was soon hungry again. I ate a second one hours later, and then just sort of let myself be hungry as we got towards camp. Last year I learned from trial and error that the nice big M1 that I enjoy before going to work doesn't work on a long hike. For hiking purposes I'm a big slug until the food digests and energy becomes available. I'm still figuring it out, but I was way more relaxed about food this time, knowing that my system can switch back and forth from burning carbs for fuel, and being fat adapted when I go back. I think I have slimmed down since our trip.

We like to look at Outdoor Gear Lab for consumer product reviews, and so far have not been disappointed. I've picked out these https://www.outdoorgearlab.com/reviews/camping-and-hiking/trekking-poles/black-diamond-alpine-carbon-cork#pricecompare. I like the way they conform to the shape of your grip. And from my recent experience, the idea of sturdy poles appeals a lot. I hope that REI has them in stock so I can see for myself!

Holly, here's another huge thing we have in common. Yes, my hubby hikes at a different pace. It makes me crazy. We've come a long way over the years, and something changed last year. I realize that for my mate, hiking is a time to be by himself and sort himself out. But I feel sad and mad when he takes off without me and gets way far ahead. He doesn't mean to be a turd, so I have to teach him. So I am. Then last year right before our big trip there was a mountain lion sighting in the area and video made by some experienced hikers. The cat was not backing down or scared away. Experts think the hikers got between her and cubs or a kill stash. So my mate was really on high alert, and chivalry kicked in, and he had me take the lead all 37-ish miles. He didn't want me out of his sight. It was great! Then last weekend he went right back to taking off without me again! I got mad. I called for him 3 times at one point when it was getting to be time for a break (we go for 45 min and rest for 15). I let him have it! I also said how nice it was last year when I got to take the lead all the time. So he didn't apologize, but he relented and had me take the lead. When we do that, he falls way behind. He just wants to hike by himself, 90% of the time. As long as I can be in front, I don't mind. And I look for him so he doesn't get too far behind, for safety, as I wish he would do. So, yeah, it always seems like I see couples hiking together and pretty close together. I don't have to chat all the time, and I don't want to be toooo close together, either, so I guess what we're now doing works for me. But I feel your pain. And the comment you got would bother me, too. It's okay to hike slowly! Who wants to rush, anyway? Can you talk to him about it, and let him know it causes you to not want to hike with him?

I love what you said about the conscious aging, and learning from your mom - I think about that all the time, too, working with elders. I feel like we're giving ourselves a huge boost to know where the levers are re inflammation and immunity - and to eliminate things from the diet instead of adding things in. For me that is a huge part of Food Freedom. And since Mom had Alz, that is hugely on my mind, too, no pun intended....After my shot yesterday I felt a headache coming on, and this morning that fever just knocked me over. I hated to use NSAIDS but if I hadn't I couldn't have moved at all! I feel a lot better now....anyway, rambling....

How go the new work outs? Cheers! Oh, and love the Meadowlily quotation!

[hollysmokes]

Thanks for the Outdoor gear link. Those poles sound pretty great; I need to do some more research. I might prefer the ones that fold up smaller but strength is a major consideration and they have them listed on sale on Amazon for around $100! Sounds like your food plan worked out well. Congrats on being able to relax about it. I found Cliff bars sweet (and yummy) when I ate sweets so I imagine they'd seem really sweet now. I like the Primal bars because they are definitely not sweet and I also like some of the Rx bars. They're sweeter because they use dates and some of the flavors (apple) are weird. The chocolate is good but very brownie-ish so that could get dangerous even though my sugar dragon hasn't made an appearance in a while- except in a crazy dream. It's nice to have options!

Turd. Yes. Not glad to hear you have a similar issue but glad to have someone to commiserate with. I'd prefer for him to go ahead or lag behind rather than be judgmental. I'll have to work on that. I like your plan to hike 45 minutes the rest 15. We go until we're tired then rest as needed. I think your plan is more...sustainable.

So far, so good on the new workouts! Right now, it's a series of 3 different workouts- one lower body, one upper and one abs. I was sore after the lower body and I do abs for the first time this afternoon and kind of dreading it (in a good way). There's a good bit of stretching and I'm using a foam roller for the first time and liking it. I put two 15-lb pork shoulders in the oven at 530 this morning so the plan is to get them out of the oven to start cooling off when I get home, work out, pull the meat and get it all cleaned up then try to get out of the house in time to watch a hockey game at 730. Haha we'll see if that all goes as planned. My workouts this week seem to be centered around pork. Wednesday I couldn't work out until I had smoked those sausages. They cooked much faster than expected so I couldn't leave them unattended BUT I did my workout even though it was much later than I wanted and I still had to get something together for dinner. That's the second time this week that we didn't eat dinner until 8 but I got it all done. I think W30 has been good for making me more accountable.

I made some more of nomnom's stir fry sauce last night. That is some delicious and useful stuff! I did a big stir fry for dinner last night then I found a forgotten container of nomnom's wonton meatballs in the freezer so I have those with some of the stir fry sauce for dipping and snow peas w oyster mushrooms for my lunch today. With everything going on this weekend I have to figure out how to feed myself next week- no time for a cookup this weekend!

I had a major craving for a glass of wine last night and I know it was because I was tired and hungry but it made me very aware of the temptations I'll be facing at the picking party Saturday night. I really like the Spindrift sodas so I think those will help save me from myself. 

Have a mahvelous weekend! Glad you're feeling better.

[LadyLisbette]

What kind of terrain do you tend to hike in? I was so surprised when my pole broke! I was really loving them, including the collapsible feature you mentioned. They're made by REI, Traverse 7075-T6 (not sure what those numbers mean) aluminum with power lock adjustment and a nice cork grip that doesn't slip when your hands are sweaty. I couldn't find the exact model on Outdoor Gear Lab to show you, but a similar one which has been discontinued, which means mine must also be discontinued...but the adjustable feature is handy. As a novice with poles, I learned from the handsome bearded fellow at REI some basics such as keeping the elbow angle at 90 degrees for flat and uphill hiking, and then extending it longer for downhill, extending the pole in front. I was feeling pretty adept with those adjustments as we went along, and with the poles in general. It definitely helped take pressure off the knees, and was also great for balancing overall, and easing my way up and down steep granite steps (not my fave!!). Even one pole was a huge advantage. I kept the one pole in my dominant right hand, and that arm was a little sore, which I didn't mind at all. I'll keep the single pole, why not...Yes, the sale price looks good on those poles, and my husband is fond of saying, "quality is remembered after price is forgotten". Good point, eh?

I could definitely stand to upgrade the energy bars. We keep them in our shop and many will expire in June, so it seemed prudent to take them. The few times since December when riding my own bike and I had a Cliff bar I noted that I didn't like it much and how not-food it felt, appeared, and tasted. And no smell. I mean, would it even rot if you left it exposed? But on the trail it was awfully delicious, and I nibbled slowly and savored. Funny how being hungry at work, and being hungry on the trail makes for a different palate! Next time I will try out the Rx bars, and if I can find Primal bars, I should try those too, thanks for the tip! Speaking of Primal products, have you ever had the Primal mayo? Do you like it?

You're a busy woman! I smiled wide reading about your super-schedule of cooking and working out, and this:

1 hour ago, hollysmokes said:

My workouts this week seem to be centered around pork.

keeps making me giggle. Oh, we are sisters. Thanks for making me laugh, I needed that! Did you know that was funny? Go, Holly, Go!!

 

1 hour ago, hollysmokes said:

Wednesday I couldn't work out until I had smoked those sausages.

Oh, yes! This is some kind of W30 genius category, certainly, and also hilarious. And, suddenly, I wish we were neighbors. Prize-winning charcuterie, I am NOT surprised!!

I must get out for a hike since the fever is gone, and although my vaccinated arm is still a little sore, it's nothing that should stop me. Thanks for the good wishes. I can't wait to hear about your workouts! Are you seeing the legendary W30 deep sleep, or any improvement at all? Lately I haven't been keeping kombucha on hand but want to get some for Saturday nights when we tend to indulge in alcohol so I can enjoy something fizzy.  I'll look for those Spindrift sodas (I like that word).

How's your young friend doing with her W30?

[hollysmokes]

I'm blaming it on the mayo! Yep, I fell off the wagon. Actually, I jumped! I was doing pretty well and all of our food was laid out so the bulk of our work was finally done. As I popped a piece of sausage in my mouth I realized that I had been dipping it in the sauce I brought for everyone else made with store-bought soybean oil mayo. Bye-bye W30! I could have stopped right there but made the decision that I didn't really want to. My funny husband mentioned that the wagon would be rolling back by our house and I could jump back on at any time but I really don't want to. I wasn't enthused about this W30 and was doing it because I felt like I should to help my (step)daughter. Our friend's beer was delicious and I indulged in a few. The picking was good and the friends were many. We hung out until 4 AM- that's CRAZY for us! By noon on Sunday, we were eating crawfish and drinking more beer. By 830 we were tucked in bed for a well deserved, long night's sleep. I'm still tired, though. From 730 Saturday morning to 4 Sunday morning I probably only sat down for a couple of hours.

My daughter is doing OK on her W30. She's not saying much about it but, IMHO, she's not "owning" it. She opted for the RealPlans menu/recipe service which is a great convenience but it makes all of the decisions for you. She struggled a bit last week because she wasn't eating enough. She does lots of high intensity, chronic cardio and didn't know that she should be including pre/post workout meals. I am going to continue with the exercise plan and that was all I really wanted out of this W30. So far I really like them and am determined not to fizzle out. I'm still feeling Friday's workout in my abs so I'm glad today is lower body- yay lunges (I'm being facetious)!  

Definitely no cook-up this weekend but I found compliant, organic sliced turkey at Publix so I lined some muffin cups with the smoked variety, tossed in an egg and topped it w salsa so I'd have breakfast today & tomorrow. It's not my favorite breakfast but it worked. Leftover pork gingerbread stew and turnip soup for lunch- thank goodness I had some leftovers in the freezer because I didn't have another plan.

Last week was so hectic that I can't tell if my sleep is improving or not. Hopefully this week will settle down and I can focus on my workouts and sleep a little more than on the pork Glad  you found that funny. It was- in a weird porky kind of way!

[LadyLisbette]

Isn't it always all about the mayo? At all times. LOL Your weekend sounds like SO. much. fun. I can't help but think of Meadowlily, about only needing to do it once, or may I say once or twice. Seems like you have W30 in your veins now. I admire the self awareness about the motivation being largely to support your daughter. I can understand that, totally....so I say, Good for you for enjoying yourself! 

As for "it's not my favorite but it worked", I'm still finishing a batch of hash that has lasted me all week since our trip, and the only thing that makes it palatable is....mayo. Yes, it's always about the mayo! LOL. I don't know what happened, I was so busy prepping I guess I forgot to season it until it was almost done, and never did get it quite right.

Okay I have another turd report, and I don't mean paleo poop story. This one's for the "to share or not to share the brilliant W30 cooking" files: With a big pot of chili on the stove yesterday the other half remarked negatively about the yams in there, which he doesn't like. Recently I had laughed (at myself) and summarized this SNL Black Jeopardy sketch, have you seen this? Funny white girl food humor!!!

 so he compared the yams in the chili to unnecessary white girl add ons! So you know what? I'm not gonna share it. Seriously. Where is the gratitude? I will find a moment of grace to point it out in a way that isn't scolding, if I can muster up that womanly magic trick. But for now my arms are folded, and what do I care, I have delicious, nutritious food to eat and he can have coconut shrimp out of the freezer since he doesn't mind. Waah!

I'm so happy you had a fun weekend, now, have a good porky week!

[hollysmokes]

I have never seen Black Jeopardy before and that's hilarious, so thanks! Yep, keep the good stuff for yourself! You deserve it. Of course, you also deserve the appreciation for doing the brilliant W30 cooking, too. So there! Weeee that's a lot of exclamation points!

I did my workout yesterday-yay for me. It hurt more because I'm a little sore everywhere but I was able to push a little harder and do little more so I feel like I can already see progress even though it's only been a week. Since I didn't do my cook-up this weekend, I need to get home and fix breakfast for the rest of the week and find something (besides pork) for lunches. Maybe burgers and sautéed veg of some sort. I really do feel like W30 eating is coming more naturally now and even my husband commented that I had been eating compliantly even when not doing a strict W30. I was shocked that he noticed. I think one of my NSV's is that even if we're out somewhere and I'm getting hungry, I don't panic about it. Even if I have to wait a while, I'll be OK and I really feel fine. Nice!

 

[LadyLisbette]

Congrats on the muscle soreness - you must be doing great! And on the awesome NSV! You've got that "know thyself" and "trust thyself" thing going on, deep down in your being, not a novel or new practice anymore. Well done! I have observed in myself in recent weeks, also, many times at the Mexican restaurant, sitting there kind of hungry, and watching my mate eat chips, and not feeling tempted. Like cigarettes, I know I like the idea of them only. Last night I ate two or four french fries off his plate, and he said, those aren't good for you. I said they aren't good for you either, and he said that I'm more important (?) but I think he meant you don't do that anymore. If only restaurants would go back to beef tallow for frying potatoes! As for the chili, we're at a humorous stand-off. He keeps asking why "we" haven't had any of that chili. Because of the white girl yams, you don't like it, you don't appreciate my cooking, you can't have any. 

Highlights of late:

You know that old voice that used to say, "Self, can I have a little of that"? Now it's, "Self, can I have a little leaky gut?" Poof, no, I don't want that.

I think I'm slimming down. I think about the scale, but I don't want to know. At the same time, I am shooting for a BMI that is a little under the line of normal weight, instead of my usual 20 lbs over the line, or at best, hovering right at that line. When to weigh in? I'm a little angsty when I think about that BMI number. So writing to you here, I might employ, "can I just observe this and not judge it?" And more will be revealed, right?

There was a reception on Tues night. I didn't drink wine, yay! Just a few choco-covered raisins, then a brownie. Face to face with the dragon, I literally reached for another one, and stopped, feeling in my bones that it was at that point not about it being worth it, but potentially going off the rails, such a familiar old feeling. Yikes. Still not bad, like your husband said to you, for not actually doing a W30, all these weeks, I think 5 weeks. So I'm not beating myself up for it!

In the it's none of my business what other people do files: There are 2 lovely 30-ish women at work who are struggling with food and weight. When they have asked, I have shared about W30. Otherwise I keep mum about what I'm doing, what they're doing, and check my judgment regularly. Yesterday, one of them said that they are forming a buddy system, vowing to not eat Mex for lunch for a whole month. I offered to be a part of the buddy system! Then she said that when so-and-so retired last year, who ate very healthfully, the other two lost their momentum without her influence. I stood there, ego a little ruffled, thinking, what am I chopped liver? But I realize they had a totally different rapport with the one now retired, who was funny-bold-sassy, and probably got up in their face, "what the heck are you eating? Are you kidding me?" LOL. She could get away with such things. Anyway, I'm so happy for these 2 that they are turning a corner and working on it. Just as I let go of my ego ruffle, she came out with a big tupperware full of salad, and started shaking it, saying, "I always think of you saying, I love me a well-tossed salad". ha ha. So I guess I'll just hold space for them, and continue to keep my mouth shut unless they ask, and just do what I do, right? Do you have dynamics like this at work?

As for Melissa who tells newbies, re the increase of time spent cooking and cleaning, "you get used to it"...what that looks like in my life is that I don't obsess about the program anymore. I also don't stress about what to cook next anymore b/c there is always something in the freezer or thawing in the fridge, and I now know about how long it takes to make the stuff I like. I know that if I make a new recipe it will take longer. The "what gives" is the time I might have spent vacuuming. In other words, I go weeks without vacuuming my house! I keep the kitchen and bathrooms up to standard, but the digs are un-vacuumed, and I'm not that stressed about it. This is a big change, and I guess it's for the better, though the inner voice of my grandmother disagrees. I can see her nose twitching.

 

[hollysmokes]

I'll never think about yams the same way again! They will always be white girl yams now and I have a football-sized white girl white yam on my counter right now so I'll have to find something (in)appropriate to add it to. Chili comes to mind and I have some in the freezer, too.

Not tempted by chips & salsa- now there's a big NSV! I made some guac a couple of weeks ago and had a couple of chips. They were delicious but it was easy to stop after very few. I enjoyed them then I was over it- kinda like your brownie. Enjoy, don't guilt, move on! Yeah!

"Preach not to others what they should eat, but eat as becomes you, and be silent." -Epictetus via kirkor. I'm in a little lab mostly by myself but my Siberian friend in the outer lab is losing weight (successfully) and was talking about low carb and becoming fat adapted but when I offered him some homemade sausage, he said that wasn't on his "diet". I just said OK and went on my pork-filled way. I have mentioned that I don't eat grains or sugar but no one  has really expressed any interest in the particulars so I'll just keep on keeping on in my little corner of the work world. It sounds like you ARE influencing their decisions, though. Now if we could do that to our husbands! I think your husband's comment was actually a compliment. He's acknowledging what you are doing and, like my husband, knows it's good but isn't ready to go there.

Ummmm, tallow- fried potatoes. Yeah, that's why I don't have one of those fry-baby things. Homemade chicharrones is the other reason.

Vacuuming is highly overrated. Cooking fabulous, healthy meals, on the other hand, is vastly underrated. I can live with little black kitty dust bunnies rolling around but can't live without my real food. Sometimes I get both

I feel like I might be losing, too. I got on the scale and it had nice things to say but two days later not so much so I'm trying to feel the difference and not measure the difference. I'll let you know how long THAT lasts!

Gotta fly!