Jump to content

Lifestyle: intentional eating


Recommended Posts

I need to get back to what I like to call "intentional eating," that is, meal planning and batch cooking, cooking at all actually, enjoying the taste and process and the sharing of wholesome nourishing foods.  I'm going to be transparent here and admit that I have not successfully completed a Whole30.  I have tried twice.  I would like to try again, but I'm not sure it's a healthy thing for me, psychologically.  I have a history of an eating disorder and while I believe in the healing benefits of the program, my therapist does not agree, because of the somewhat obsessive nature of it.  I also see a cardiologist for a chronic heart condition and he is for some reason still on the idea of the American Heart Association diet, meaning, he disagrees with paleo/Whole30 (which is what I have used as nutrition for two or so years now) and also does not think it's healthy for me specifically to restrict any food groups, and would actually like to see me put ON some weight.  I saw him last in December and decided to take his advice to see what would happen, so for two months I have eaten whatever I wanted, dairy, sugar, all sorts of whole grains.  I did put on a couple pounds, I see it in my belly, but more importantly I don't feel good, really.  I am a nurse in the hospital setting, and work evenings and nights, and what finally tripped my alarm, like this is not how I want to live, is....I got home Saturday morning at 0800 after my night shift, wasn't really ravenous but was slightly hungry, and ate two pieces of Little Caesars pizza, (which is ghetto cheap pizza) three cookies, and drank two glasses of wine.....whaaaaaaa?!?  All that when I wasn't really hungry.  All things that taste amazing, but hold no nutritional value and make me feel gross later!  I woke up in three hours, because alcohol is horrible for sleep despite it being a depressant, and was nauseated and bloated and headachey for a good 24hours, meaning, I STILL feel gross!  My sugar dragon is raging!  I pretty much gave my sugar dragon an all you can eat buffet.  Ugh.  No more.  So I'm posting in this forum knowing that I am not going to start a round today, maybe I will in the future, who knows? but I am making intentional changes today.  The idea of logging publicly appeals because it means something, it makes it more social and connected to support (if anyone reads it haha).  


Goals for this week are:  

drink coffee black instead of sweet and creamed and only 8oz per 24hrs (better for my heart condition to lower my caffeine intake)

drink 48oz of water per 24hrs (or more, but that's the size of my Nalgene bottle) 

if choosing, limit wine to 6oz per 24hrs (for better sleep, better adherence to rest of goals, better skin and guts, less fuel for sugar dragon.  not ready to abstain yet completely)

prep/plan meals and intake and not rely on cereal/sandwiches/toast/bars

continue lifestyle of NOT quantifying my body, my food, or my fitness (this is really where the spirit of the program IS healthy for me, and effectively stopped my "tracking" behaviors last April when I made it almost two weeks into a round.  I used to be a slave to my Fitbit, I entered every single calorie into that database after I had weighed/measured every item that went in my mouth, I logged my workouts and steps and even had the wifi linked scale that I hopped on once a day.  I gave away the Fitbit to a friend last year and very very rarely use those behaviors, as my therapist refers to them.  If I do, I know I need to pay attention to other areas in my life and pursue some self care.)

move my body every day for as much as my heart will allow, paying attention and honoring whatever that may be (on a painfree day a bouldering or ice skating session, on a low level pain day maybe a slow walk, on a persistent pain day some gentle mobility and stretching and foam rolling massage.  The idea is to facilitate body acceptance and love)


What I hope will happen this week:  

better GI comfort (no nausea, bloating or irregularity)

better sleep (especially since I'm on nights again all week)

more energy 

more positive mood

less guilt and shame about food and more pleasant associations with providing nourishment and energy to be my best self 


I guess it looks like people journal their intake and experience of the day at the end, not as it happens in real time, so I shall do another entry before bed tonight I guess. :) 



Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am so technologically inept that I wasn't sure how to keep this log, but I guess I just keep using submit reply.  I had a pretty icky day.  Just overtired and nauseous and spacey with mild chest pain.  Finally got to get a six hour stretch of sleep in and am now awake for a little while studying and eating, then I'll go back to bed.  It's 2am so this entry is for yesterday's experience.  Ugh, night shift life :(  I did get a lot of meal prep done so that feels nice.  I roasted sweet potatoes and asparagus in bacon fat, did a batch of hard boiled eggs in the Instant Pot, made a big shepards pie casserole (my son's request) and did some overnight oats.  (I know oats are not compliant)  Yesterdays intake:

one cup black coffee, small banana with cashew butter smeared on it

bone broth with a little ginger grated into it

a handful's worth of sweet potato

did some slow yoga/mobility work to try to get myself flowing and feeling better

"shepards pie" made of ground pork, half an onion, couple garlic cloves, one can each of sweet corn and green beans, parsley, salt and pepper, white potatoes mashed with ghee and bone broth.  Pretty simple flavors and easy to put together and my kids liked it.  I melted cheese over theirs.  

only 28oz water today so that could have been better.  also I know I didn't eat enough in general but my guts needed the rest.  I also took a couple tums at one point and took my multivitamin.  I feel better as of right now so hoping for a better day tomorrow.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok day - no nausea or chest pain, I slept for 16 of 24 hours lol!  Guess my body was trying to tell me something.  Opted for another session of stretching and mobility instead of leaving the house to do something more strenuous, when my kids are home I hate to leave them, all too soon they will be gone and I'll have all the time in the world to pursue fitness.  Used my planner and got some things done, did some more independent learning for work and read a quick book.  Just had a good night at work.  We had a potluck (nurses are always having potlucks I swear it's every five minutes) but I had just what I wanted and nothing more.  Because of my weird schedule that log will be tomorrow morning, but intake for Monday the 26th:

black coffee which is still pretty gross but lets me drink less of it on account of the grossness

6oz wine

one la croix

28oz water which is lacking

meal one - leftover shepards pie

meal two - salad of kale, green olives, smoked trout, walnuts, an apple, avocado, and primal dressing.  wow that was a lot of salt and fat I think.  but so yummy.

meal three - 3 hard boiled eggs, handfuls worth of sweet potato, probably ten asparagus spears, with pickled beets and primal chipotle mayo on the side for dipping

except for the wine, this day was compliant :) 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

this was an ok 24hrs as far as feelings toward food go, and choosing what's right for me, but it was not the most compliant with the program.  

Meal 1 - potluck at work.  corn chips, guacamole, sour cream, refried beans, ground taco type beef, shredded taco type chicken, and 2 chocolate chip cookies.  that was on one plate and I didn't go back for more, so that is a small triumph.  and a La Croix.  nobody brought any fruits or vegetables lol but there was three bags of Juanita's chips.  

Meal 2 - chicken tenders and  primal chipotle mayo for dipping, 6oz wine.  could have chosen a vegetable but nothing sounded good and I was tired.

Meal 3 - another La Croix, salad again of kale, smoked trout, an apple, handful walnuts, handful green olives, and primal dressing.  

also had one cup black coffee and 24oz water

slept 8hrs but didn't do any movement or activity - should have probably but laid around on the couch before work with social media instead.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

yesterday was such a fun and productive day!  it's my "weekend" right now so I elected to stay up after my shift to get adult-y things done - ended up being up for almost 24hrs but it worked out well.  Goals worked on were that I cooked and kept drinking water.  Didn't stay to the program but feel good about my choices nonetheless, i.e., all intake was what I wanted and I feel zero guilt or remorse for it.  Success!

Meal 1 - Made "sloppy joes" with ground beef, tomato paste, onions, garlic, and tessamaes ketchup and bbq sauce.  I had mine with sweet potatoes and side of asparagus, boys chose the typical buns - this meal was compliant

Meal 2 - "overnight oats" made with hemp milk, steel cut oats, PB fit dried peanut butter and orange marmalade.  

Meal 3 - made a quiche with eggs, kale, walnuts, mushrooms, and bacon, it was sooooo good - boys did not try so the whole pie is for meeeee

Meal 4 - date night - two margaritas, a burger with bacon, avocado, cheese, wasabi mayo, pickled cucumbers, lettuce and tomato on an English muffin, and fries.  I actually only ate half of this and took the rest home and the boys split it.  I consider that a success because I stopped when I felt full.  A different choice would have been to eat past that point because it tastes so good, then feel overly stuffed and uncomfortable in my body and mind, feeling gluttonous and heavy and aware of my tummy sticking out.  Aaaaaaaand we shared an amazing creme brûlée as well which was totally worth it.  One of my favorite restaurants and dates and I always order this same thing. :) 

no movement today unfortunately, I am not doing so hot on that goal/intention.  Not sure why, I guess it doesn't feel important to me every day.  I am feeling ok in my body this week so far.  

40oz of water

one cup black coffee

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since it's my "weekend", and I'm not at work my stomach woke me up growling at 0230.  Hashtag nightshift problems.  I'm wide awake so might as well make some coffee and do some independent study/reading, and I thought I would log yesterday now.  Thursday the 1st of March.  March already!  I had a good day, actually didn't do much but feel like that's ok.  Still feeling acceptance of my eating, body and activity.  I had wanted to exercise yesterday but ended up not getting to it early enough and the boys came home and I stayed with them.  Also had some very mild and transient chest pain and tightness.  My oldest went grocery shopping with me and that was indicative of my current intentions, I spent $300 ten days ago and another $300 yesterday!  And literally the only things in my freezer are bananas and meat.  So much meat lol.  And hardly anything in the snack cupboard, and the pantry is filled with fun things to cook with, and there is so much produce I'm worried we won't eat it all before it spoils!  Makes me think of how different grocery shopping will be when it's just me in a couple years.  I definitely won't be spending so much!  (right now it's me and two teenage boys)  Used Pinterest and have ten different recipes to work from, hoping to make this trip last another ten days.  

Meal 1 - Overnight oats as above, but today I felt like my tummy was bloated after I ate them...since I woke up fine and was fine last night I don't think it was all my date night food, I feel like it was the oats...although I didn't feel like that strongly when I ate them the day before.  I believe hemp milk is compliant since it's a seed, I know the marmalade, oats and peanut butter are not.  I threw the remaining serving away and will remember this combo as not working for me.  I'll try to pay attention to having those individual ingredients otherwise and my reactions to them as well.  I guess that's the benefit of doing an entire round, I can see that now.  (the strict reintroduction phase) 

Meal 2 - Made a chili/taco meat kind of skillet with 12oz ground bison, 2 bell peppers, garlic, can of corn, turmeric and cayenne.  I put mine over white potato and the boys over buns.  Turned out pretty good for me, the boys thought the "meat to corn ratio was not good" lol.  This meal was compliant.  

Meal 3 - leftover quiche

one cup black coffee

36oz water

no alcohol today

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For some reason that post was hovering around not posted - so it's actually about a week old.  I see a pattern where if I'm having food/body/activity/heart challenges, I don't post or journal, I get out of the habit, maybe because it's not pleasant to think or write about.  This last week I worked a lot, still on night shift, and my heart was irritable.  Had a day of feeling sadness and grief for the things I am not able to do.  I did have some regretful meals, one or two over a week, mostly because of how I felt physically afterward, i.e. an Italian style sandwich with poor nutritional value, toast with avocado and peanut butter that made me reflux as I was trying to sleep.  I am out of wine, and don't plan on buying more, it's been three days I think.  Feels fine.  Trying to get enough water in so my guts run smooth, my blood flows easy, and my skin looks better.  

Fast forward to now - I have tonight and the next four nights off and needed to put Instagram down and MOVE MY BODY, so I went to the bouldering gym for an hour. Did have chest pain and palpitations in the moment, but I don't right now.  At this moment, it felt worth it.  I did 2-3 blues and 3-4 pinks, the strongest I've ever done.  My hands and arms are aching!  Feels so good!  

I plan on cooking/baking/prepping in the next few days so that all this produce doesn't go bad, so far it's been ok.  I'll try to remember to log on here, I do think it's helpful.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Whole30 Certified Coach

Hi!  You mentioned not going out to exercise so you could spend time with the kids - are there things you can do together?  Do you go to the climbing gym with them? That seems like a perfect family movement activity!  

And gosh, it seems like you need more water... or do you have to restrict it due to heart concerns?  48oz seems like not much, even if you are <100 lbs... and working in a dehydrating hospital.  I come home from work feeling like I walked through the desert even after drinking close to 100oz!  

And, PS, thanks for working nights :) Every time I get report at 7 AM I wonder how you guys do it...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi littleg, thanks for your comment!  I DO need to drink more water!  48oz seems like a ton and yet I feel so much better when I do, even though I'm peeing every five minutes.  For my heart it's actually better if I am hydrated, my MD says "hydrate more than you think you need,".  I am playing around with the idea of lessening wine and coffee and drinking just water, slowly working that change in because I know I need to.  I still never felt symptoms from that night at the gym, it's so weird.  I should go again today maybe while the kids are in school.  I have two teenage boys, one in college actually, and they don't have an interest in that activity.  One is pretty darn sedentary with tv and games and the other is a gym rat, once in awhile I'll go with him but for the most part, exercise has been something I do by myself.  


yesterday's intake:  two cups coffee with coconut cream and torani syrup - I know, I know, it's awful.  

                                   9am couple spoonfuls of cashew butter mixed with bacon fat and melted over roasted carrots and sweet potato 

                                   2pm epic bacon bar and cherry pie larabar

                                   5pm club sandwich out on a date - turkey, cheese, bacon, etc on a croissant, and one glass of wine - brought the kids home my fries

                                   plus a can of la Croix and 32oz water


I felt awful last night!  physically and emotionally.   I see now here that I underfed myself, and so then when I went out for dinner I ate more than I felt comfortable with.  I felt overly full and heavy and like I wished I had made different choices.  That made me spiral into sadness and despair and 'what am I going to do now?' type thinking, hating myself and my life and wishing I could talk to someone about it.  In the moment it feels very lonely, like no one else would understand or honor and listen to my thoughts, and so I cuddled the dog in bed awhile and journaled, and watched tv with the boys and then went to bed feeling a little better.  Now its morning again, and the cycle starts over.  I feel sometimes such ambivalence towards food, like oh ok I have to eat again now, I really need to do that.  But nothing sounds good, or is "right" or whatever.  Like right now, in bed, I have no idea what my food plan is the rest of the day and no excitement of figuring it out.  The kitchen is full of healthy compliant options matched with recipes off Pinterest and I just haven't been creating them, even though it's my stretch off.  I guess if I want to feel better, I just have to do it.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Whole30 Certified Coach

Just tossing this out there.  Take it or leave it.  Have you noticed you feel better with, um, say, meals vs lara bar meals?  Or no Torani syrup ;) ? What flavor syrup do you get?  If it happens to be vanilla...  buy something like this, mix it in with your coconut cream (I assume you mean the fatty part of coconut milk). A milk frother will really help things look and taste too-good-to-be-true.   Really, its good.  

Your first meal would have been great if you had 3 eggs with it!  What was going on with that lunch?  Were you stuck somewhere without the ability to have real food?  That meal alone would send me *totally* off the rails.  Your last meal looks great to me!  Did it taste good?  I hope so :) What caused the despair?  I guess I don't see a connection... You ate a bit too much of a tasty sandwich?  That is what people do when they go out to eat!  If you eat dinner out every night, yeah, maybe it is a habit you want to be really careful of, but if it is a infrequent occurrence?  Food intake can be a squiggly line - some days you eat less, others more.  But whatever it was it sounds like you found a way to give yourself some self-care with the dog snuggles and journaling.  How great you have some tools to help you when you feel down!  

I get the food "mehs"!  Are there any foods you just really love that are super easy?  For me it is egg salad.  If I'm feeling meh - I make 3 eggs with a big blob of mayo.  It is healthy and it fills me up and it takes 2 minutes to make if the hardboiled eggs are in the fridge.  Otherwise I think you are right that you have to "fake it til you make it".  Put on some music, cook up those meals and then they are there.  You'll eat them because you won't want to throw them away!  And food ambivalence can be a good thing I think (as someone with much too much emotional attachment to food I wish I were more ambivalent).  If you don't *care* what you are eating - keep easy to cook meats and vegetables and maybe some sweet potatoes around and just eat them.  And then move on to exciting things like bouldering!  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

littleg this brought me to tears, really.  thank you for your kind words and encouragement.  it feels like you understand.  in the moment the despair of eating a sandwich is so real, but .... ok, did I burn down an orphanage?  smoke crack in a back alley?  NO, I fed my body something that tasted good and shared a meal with the person I am feeling affection for.  But, last night I had dinner out with my parents and kids, pizza, which is one of my favorite foods, and I was feeling low level anxiety the whole afternoon, like, ok - how am I going to have a pleasant experience and feel comfortable with this?  So I just made a plan, of eating two pieces and having one glass of wine, and drinking my entire water glass, and trying to really taste the food, and engage in conversation and be present, instead of being in my head about my body or what is in pizza that is right or wrong.  And I did all those things. :)   


That vanilla for my coffee looks interesting!  I would try that.  I always think/rationalize the coffee dilemma by the fact that it's such a small act of sweet.  Like I'm not eating cake for breakfast, does it really make such a difference?  But maybe it does.  I do understand the idea that the first thing you eat sets the tone for the rest of the day.  And I should have fried some eggs there, I don't know why I didn't.  Meal two was annoying and not on purpose, I keep those sorts of things in my glovebox, I had an eye exam and didn't think I would be hungry at that time - didn't have time to stop somewhere and ate those items literally in my car minutes before checking in.  But I actually count that as a small victory because sometimes (ok usually) I would ignore the hunger and think, oh I'll be home in an hour and then I'll have a good lunch, I'll wait till then.  So this time I did listen to my body, but it backfired anyway.  ???  Do people just take reusable containers with roasted veggies and protein everywhere they go on this program?!?  


yesterdays intake:  woke up early (for me, since I'm on a stretch off) and felt resolved to meal prep and plan!  

Meal 1 - made Creamy Eggplant-tahini soup and Sriracha turkey meatballs, had one cup coffee with only coconut cream in it  (ugh not yummy)  *compliant meal

Meal 2 - more meatballs and a whole sweet potato, drizzled all with Yumm sauce (local product, not compliant because of lethicin and garbanzos) 

snack of large apple (hungry but meeting for pizza in two hours....listened to my body and ate something instead of waiting) 

Meal 3 - two slices thin crusted pizza with sausage, artichoke hearts, red bell peppers, and mushrooms, and one glass red wine (tasted good and enjoyed good company, felt full enough I didn't need any more, even though it tasted so good I could have eaten the whole pie lol - satiated I guess is the word, and the goal, right?) :) 

oh and 40oz water


Link to comment
Share on other sites

yesterday was a good day.  got a lot of reading done, housework, watched a movie.  I planned out my meals in advance when I made my weekend to do list and I do think that helped.  

Meal 1 - leftover meatballs, paleo-ish pumpkin prune bread I had baked.  I say ish and it's not compliant because it has sweetener in it, honey.  coconut flour is a weird medium, isn't it?  they are good little slices, but very different consistency than typical baked goods.  boys didn't like them.  two cups of coffee with syrup and coconut cream - then I had mild nausea (think from straight fat/sugar/hot stimulant ugh) that resolved with the food BUT I also had mild 2/10 chest achiness that lasted most of the day.....this is fascinating and if I need to only drink one cup of coffee instead of two to lessen the instance of symptoms I WILL DO IT.  It's almost exciting, like maybe this is the answer!  Caffeine intake is the variable!  

Meal 2 - salad of smoked trout, an apple, a tangerine, pickled beets, and tessamaes dressing, plus leftover soup.  Compliant. 

Meal 3 - I made a sort of stew type thing, it was meant to be baked in a pie but I just added more broth and skipped the arrowroot thickening step and put it in a deep bowl for serving.  Tasted and smelled amazing but turned out very salty, I guess there is such a thing as too much bacon, who knew?!  ground pork, bacon, bone broth, onions, garlic, carrots, parsnips and mushrooms seasoned with rosemary and parsley.  I did feel full and heavy afterward, but not in an anxious way, more of a factual, "I am feeling this way," way.  My GI tract is feeling heavy and sluggish so I think that's why.  I need to do some activity today to rev things up and out, and continue drinking more water.  52oz yesterday!  so much!  

feeling good this morning, the sun is out - feeling a bit like I want to weigh myself, but am not giving into that impulse.  I don't want the number to mean anything.  I am also feeling a little like tracking my intake in a calculator type app but that seems like a bad idea for the same reason, and is definately not the spirit of the program.  


Link to comment
Share on other sites

The sun is still out!  It's 50 degrees here in Oregon and it makes everything more bright, open and joyful.  I did end up going to the apartment gym and getting my weightless Crossfit workout for heart disease patients on, lol, I'm sure it looks dumb to anyone else but if it's all I can do, it's what I'm going to do.  And I am sore and fatigued today, so it must be enough!  That increase in circulation, oxygenation, and endorphins translated to a great feeling about myself and my body and intake all day.  Mood:  glorious, playful, affectionate and strong!

Pre WO - pumpkin prune bread and a cup of coffee with coconut cream in it - compliant

Meal 1 - 2 pieces leftover pizza from the other night - not compliant but felt fine, justified it by thinking I needed extra (?) because I just worked out.  Hm.  

Meal 3 - was kindof more a mini meal, I was on a date and we had fifteen minutes to eat before a movie, so we split a Caprese sandwich and a pint of cider.  So, good artisan bread, fresh mozzerella, basil leaves, pesto mayo and fresh tomatoes, and pickle.  It was just the right amount and tasted really good, and of course was shared in good company.  No qualms about eating it.  - but for sure not compliant

Meal 4 - back at home it was time to do my half-a-night shift switch, on the last night of my "off stretch" I typically stay up half the shift's worth, until 0300, then wake up whenever my body tells me to so that I get a solid sleep but hopefully adapt as nocturnal.  So I did need another meal and was hungry.  I didn't do so good in my choices ... I had a glass of wine, two oatmeal cookies, and a bowl of leftover pork stew....reflecting:  I guess all throughout the day I did eat A LOT of breads/dairy/grains/sugars, what the heck?!, which may have (to be honest, did) contribute to a slip.  (I have been trying not to drink wine at home)  Didn't feel overly full or anxious after, it was more like, oh shoot....I just ate cookies and wine and those are things I was trying not to eat because they make me feel worse than if I don't eat them.  *sigh* 

every day is another change to change a habit, right?  

I did intake 48oz of water though, that was on track.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Whole30 Certified Coach

First, lets address this coffee issue :) Are you using coconut  cream?  Like canned full fat coconut cream (TJ, WF sell it)?  Do you have a milk frother?   Frothing it makes a huge difference.  That vanilla powder stuff... big difference too.  Try it.  I *bet* you'll like it!  Or have you tried Nutpods?  I like the French Vanilla flavor.  Better than Torani :)

Glad you found a way to enjoy the pizza dinner!  And sun and exercise are nature's way of making you feel better!  Though, I'm not sure you are right that there was too much bacon in your stew... ;)

No idea how you do night shift... Are you an RN, RT, MD? 


Link to comment
Share on other sites

littleg I do use the fatty top of the canned coconut milk, it's so beautiful and decadent.  I use a little whisk type thing.  Looked for the vanilla powder at the grocery store but didn't find it so I may well order that off amazon.  I'm not sure I could ever not drink coffee....but....

I downloaded an app on my phone and am going to stop drinking alcohol.  As of this writing I am 36hrs sober.  (it's a running clock with chips you earn kind of app)  I feel like drinking is changing the results of my intentional eating progress, because lets face it after a long night shift, drinking a glass of wine and eating five bakery cookies then having poor sleep and reflux and waking up looking puffy and cranky like a two yr old is pretty obviously unhealthy!!!  I haven't told anyone except my therapist today, because I don't want the attention, and I don't want people to know if I fail.  I poured out two and a half bottles of wine down the sink, AND THE TORANI SYRUP!!!  I am resolved to feel better and this feels like an important step.  I don't have a goal in mind, as far as a timeline or if it's forever or what, but just to see what happens.  And who knows, I may feel amazing in a month and never look back.  Addicts run heavy in my family, my mom, aunt, uncle, brother to some extent, and all four grandparents have all struggled and are now clean (or dead.)  And I've seen firsthand, end stage liver disease is a horrific way to die.  

I'm an RN at the largest local hospital here on the neuroscience/neurosurgery floor, I've been there plus did some hospice work, all in all 12yrs.  I've worked all the shifts but am just finishing up a month on nights, just to help out because they were very short staffed.  Next week I go back to eight hour evenings, hopefully will be on a day shift 12hr position by the end of the year.  I have ADD for shift work lol.  I do find that eves and nights are really triggering for chaotic eating afterwards at home.  It must be a release of some kind, a habit of consuming feelings and thoughts in a way that I don't think day shift brings, because with day shift it's dinnertime for everyone in the house usually, so you cook and sit down and it's more normal.  Thinking of going back to school for a BSN as well as getting some more specialized certifications within the next five yrs.  

I haven't really tracked my intake very well the last few days, it seems to always be that way on my "on" stretch, I don't make it a priority, but I have been doing ok with eating and avoiding disordered behaviors, I think.  Have not felt like weighing or tracking, have not had body image shame or obsession.  Haven't gotten any activity or exercise in all week, but oh well.  Have not been 100% program compliant, but that's not really what my log is about.  I'll try to remember today's:  

Meal 1 - two lamb chops on a bed of romaine, with a handful of cherry tomatoes, half a cucumber, and an orange with guacamole and and tessamaes dressing.  

Meal 2 - piece of apple pie (it was pi day lol) roast beef deli meat on romaine with sweet bell peppers and an orange and Yumm sauce.  

Meal 3 - two pieces toast with ghee and peanut butter, about a quarter of the pint of dairy free coconut milk based ice cream.  

coffee and coconut cream - no sweetener 

48oz water

half a bottle of kombucha, unsweetened 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Whole30 Certified Coach

That is a bold step with the alcohol.  Good for you :) That takes guts!  The Torani is even better!  Wine has some positive health benefits associated with it - but I'm pretty sure the Torani has none!  It sounds like a great mindset too... lets just see what happens if today I don't drink.  And when you do that over and over and over suddenly you've had no wine for a month or two.  

We have a "crunchy" store that sells a brand of the vanilla powder - if that store weren't around I assume it would have to be an Amazon purchase.  

Neuro... and nights.  I couldn't do that.  But I guess we all find our niches.  I do pediatrics which I know lots of adult RNs say they could never do.   

Have you ever heard of Chemical Pie?  When I was a teacher I used to give the kids the recipe and they could make it on Pi day.  I don't know if your kids are too old to get a kick out of this but its kinda neat in an "how can this taste like apples?" sort of way.


Nice job on no weighing and tracking.  I spent YEARS in that wormhole.  Ugh.  Whenever friends try the If It Fits Your Macros thing I just think about all the hours of their life they'll never get back weighing and tracking their food... Such a better mental space to be in to "just eat real food".  I may not have a 6 pack abs but I'll trade that for a bit of sanity around food any day!  Have you read Gary Taubes book Why We Get Fat (or something like that)?  He presents a lot of the science that shows our bodies are not just little bomb calorimeters and the fallacy of calories in = calories out.  Because I'm a science nerd that book was really what made me stop tracking calories.  

Anyway, have either a good day or a good sleep!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am so exhausted I can hardly keep my eyes open.  Plus I have a headache.  Plus my back hurts.  Plus I changed my cup like fourteen times during my shift.  Plus I need to poop.  Plus I am so hungry right now and was all night even though it felt like I brought and ate plenty of food.  Yay for menstruation.


Still sober.   48oz water.  

Meal 1 - three eggs fried in ghee and thrown over sautéed sweet peppers, red cabbage and romaine streaked with coconut aminos and sriracha.  two cups coffee with coconut cream in it - no sweetener - 

Meal 2 - half a pint of dairy free coconut milk based ice cream - oopsie

Meal 3 - pork chop with carrot curry sauce, THE BEST asparagus quick sautéed in olive oil, salt and pepper, also some jackfruit and a spoonful of peanut butter.

Meal 4 - (at work) another pork chop and the rest of the asparagus, handful of black olives, half cup canned corn, one string cheese.

What a weird day of eating lol.  everything tasted really good but was a mashup for sure.  I was hungry all day ugh.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Still sober.  Going on day five now.  Feels good.  Even went on a date and didn't feel like I needed a drink.  I didn't post Sunday and here it is also Monday so I'll try to remember two days worth of intake.

Meal 1 - Sunday coming off my last night shift.  Lentil butternut pumpkin soup.  - felt nourishing and tasted good - 

Meal 2 - granola with milk and a handful of chopped prunes in it.  - same as above - 

snack of Sweet Cream cold brew coffee and a piece coffee cake from Starbucks.  - was so incredibly yummy it made me happy even though I know it had no nutritional value - 

Meal 3 - two pieces Pizza Hut sausage mushroom olive pizza and a la croix

48oz water

Today, Monday, I'm back to evening (swing) shift

Meal 1- Salad of romaine, sweet peppers, an orange, and Tofurky strips, and tessamaes dressing.  Yummy. 

Meal 2 - Store bought salad of black beans, corn, cherry toms, and a cilantro type dressing, also piece of carrot cake from the break room.  If this cake was in front of my face right now I would be buried in it. 

snack of an apple

Meal 3 - a yogurt, and another bowl of lentil butternut pumpkin soup.  Intentionally trying not to binge right now.  

Noticing that my diet is pretty much eating whatever I want lately.  Not in a bad way necessarily, but definitely doesn't have anything to do with Whole30.  I don't feel thin or skinny, but I'm not hating myself either.  I feel neutral about my body.  I still need to poop even though all this fiber.  oh yeah 48oz water.  Maybe I'll try for more.  Not sure what all this means.  oh yeah and each day I had my customary coffee with coconut cream and no sweetener.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've seen that tip here on the forums frequently, might have to check that out.  What is the scientific reason for the sluggish GI tract?  It seems like eating so much vegetables would be the answer, not the problem.  I'm going to the bathroom every day it just feels like not enough and my tummy is not flat like it usually would be.  I'm going to keep trying to increase my water intake, shooting for 60oz now daily which is the recommendation according to my reading on here.  Ugh I hate feeling so full physically but I'm also hungry so much when I eat Whole30!  I'm was literally hungry and full at the same time yesterday every couple of hours.  I remember that from before too and it wasn't until day 8 that I felt comfortable in my gut again.  And that was being strict and actually doing the plan 100%.  So feeling at odds with my body today and yesterday, not anxious or obsessive, just aware and noticing I don't look the way I did three months or a year ago.  Not feeling like doing any activity at all, just been working and parenting and living.  Still sober.  8 days now I think.  :) Intake for yesterday as best I can remember:

Meal 1 - handful sweet peppers, handful asparagus, handful shredded purple cabbage, and two Aidells chicken apple sausage links, roasted in olive oil.  So good I Instagrammed it lol - compliant

Meal 2 - two chicken thighs that were sautéed in ghee and lemon slices, three little baby potatoes - compliant, only had a short break to eat, plus got full fast

Meal 2 - rest of the little baby potatoes (three more) five prunes, an apple, and a heaping tablespoon of peanut butter - except for the PB, compliant 

Meal 3 - one romaine head, tessamaes dressing mixed with Yumm sauce and scriacha, an orange, and five Quorn nuggets - not compliant because of Yumm sauce and Quorn which I'm sure has a bunch of chemicals and crap in it.  Oh also two Aussie bites from Costco.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Whole30 Certified Coach

Who knows about sluggish GI - lots of reasons.  Too little water could be a big one.  Even 60 oz isn't all that much *especially* in a dry hospital environment.  Poor gut flora could be another.  Have you taken lots of abx over your life?  Do you take a probiotic?  Eat fermented foods?  Those might be worth a shot.  Not moving much obviously can contribute as well but it sounds like between being an RN and walking you probably get lots of movement in.  Hormonal stuff - for 6 months post partum or so I pooped nothing but rabbit pellets no matter what I did and then one day it just stopped.  FODMAPS, SIBO, other acronyms... "poor gut function" can be quite the whack a mole game... 

 I'd try the magnesium and see if it helps.  I take Magnesium Serene - I get it on Amazon.  There are other brands too.  You can dive into the wormhole of which type of Mg to buy (I have) and although citrate doesn't get a thumbs up from every source it has been working for me for years so I stick with it.  Oh, and adding fat can help too - lubes things up it seems :) If you ever feel really stuck try melting 2 tbsp of coconut oil and taking it like a shot on an empty stomach - holy bowel emptying... Or maybe these for a more gentle push.  

Nice job on the 8 days!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guess what?!  I just ordered some swanky vanilla powder, nut pods and bulletproof type coffee oil to mix in....I'm so excited to hopefully have yummy coffee again....researched the magnesium and was quickly overwhelmed with choices and how to know what it is that I would actually be getting....thought about digestive enzymes as well but really think I'll try increasing water intake and the bulletproof add in and go from there.  Ugh had a crazy shift just now and didn't get a timely lunch break - when I did finally get in there of course two pumpkin pies were sitting in front of me.  Pumpkin pie is my favorite pie.  Nurses like their treats, don't they!  I feel pretty strong because I chose not to have a single bite.  I ate my prepped meal of home cooked compliant food and feel good about it, no remorse or longing or craving.  Had a headache most of the shift, once I took my break and closed my eyes for five minutes and took deep breaths it went away without medication.  Got my 60oz water in, yay!!!

Meal 1 - heaping handful shredded red cabbage, handful asparagus, two adielles compliant sausages.  two cups coffee with coconut cream.  

Meal 1 - four little baby potatoes, two chicken thighs, five prunes

Meal 2 - apple, two Aussie bites from Costco, handful almonds 

actually looking at this I hardly eat any produce at all dang it!  ugh might have to go shopping again.  I swear I go shopping and spend $300 a week like clockwork.  It's secretly kind of fun, though.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Whole30 Certified Coach

Sounds like you'll have some delicious coffee coming your way!  If you increase the water you'll see if water and fat help move things along!  I hope you like the vanilla powder... it isn't cheap and I'll feel bad if you don't :(  

Nice job in the break room.  So hard for me some days.  So easy other days.  

Sorry about the Mg wormhole... it is a bad one!

Sleep well!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am excited for tomorrow because my fun coffee stuff will arrive and I'm meeting up with some girlfriends for a beginner pole dancing class and I have been wanting to try it for awhile!  I am not sure I'm strong enough but we shall see.  I haven't done any activity in over a week and I'm feeling the itch to move my body!  Today was a nice day, it's my weekend off and I really made an effort to eat using meals and not bits and pieces of snacky type things.  Every thing tasted good and felt right.  Still sober. :) 

Meal 1 - handful asparagus roasted in olive oil and scriacha, bowl of red lentil-pumpkin-butternut curry soup from the freezer, and a forkful of arame-cabbage kraut.  - trying some probiotics to see if it helps my guts feel cleaner.   two cups coffee with coconut cream

Meal 2 - handful size pulled pork and these kale-potato nugget things from the freezer section - yummy!  the meat turned out way too salty though, tessamaes bbq sauce on top for contrast helped.

Meal 3 - one chicken thigh, five prunes, and four little baby potatoes (leftovers that were sautéed in lemon and ghee)

Meal 4 - I was still hungry....one apple, a yogurt, and two Aussie bites from Costco.  

only 40oz water today, dang it.  


Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...