Fighting the good fight! And trying to stay on the wagon

[Radcliffec]

Hiya everyone! A bit about me: I just did my second whole30 in January. I've done lots of whole30-ish eating in between (and lots of less whole30-ish eating in between too! - the struggle is real!) I am a young professional in Canada. I'm engaged to my lovely boyfriend of 5.5 years - the wedding is in 109 days!!!!! I guess I'm here today because I have been struggling with my food freedom. I've been a little too free with my food if you know what I'm saying. lol. However, I know I did really well on my whole30 in Jan. I astonishingly did stick to my reintroduction (unlike last year) this time too - despite having quite the personal crisis happen towards the end of it. And that is the reason, I believe, I've been a lot less motivated about my diet.

This was what happened. I've been working at my dream job (in a temporary position) since last summer along with one of my best friends who was also in a temp position in the same department, doing the same job. In November my bff/coworker was told that due to the budget, her and I would have to compete against one another for the same position sometime in the New Year and that I would end up getting laid off or she would end up going back to her permanent position with the organization. I got engaged mid-December. My fiancé and I quickly set a date and chose our bridal/groom parties. (Like I said we've been dating a whiiillllee!!!) So we set the date for the Canada Day weekend. I asked my bff/coworker if she would be my Maid of Honour. She said yes! In that first month or so of the engagement, I was so happy, I got sooo much planning done! Then - the interview came around. Long story short - to my surprise, I got the job and my MOH/bff/coworker did not - and she was in the department first so she feels a lot like I'm steeling her job. What is a really unfortunate management decision, has totally ruined our friendship. This all happened like 6 weeks ago and she's still not speaking to me. If you hadn't already guessed she backed out of my wedding. And ... anyways... this has really taken a toll on me mentally. We had a lot of friends in common (that my fiancé and I met through her) that we will not see anymore. So those 14 people who got save the dates probably won't even come to the wedding. Work has been hell ever since this happened - we both still work here at the moment - one cubicle apart - in total - deafening silence. We also had mutual coworker friends and things feel weird there too because I feel like I can't go and chat with the girls at work anymore. Anyways, it all sucks! I'm starting to get over it. But her husband messaged me this weekend because he was going to make us a wedding video as a gift, and now he still wants to do it but he wants us to pay for it. Anyways, this is what has made me so upset/depressed/whatever this past month and today I am saying "Yeah it sucks but it doesn't give me permission to eat mindlessly." Also - I have a wedding in 109 days that I want to look my best for! Goals!