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Ji's post-W30 log


Jihanna

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I totally missed that we have a reintro area for logs too, so had been posting in my regular log... but I'll move here now. I'm just not going to bother copy/pasting over, since I can still find the other one whenever I want/need. 

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1 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 2, compliance and recovery

Meal 1 -- 8:30
eggs and potatoes

Meal 2 -- 15:30
small salad

Meal 3 -- 19:30
ground beef and butternut squash (skillet), roasted squash, roasted cabbage


5:45
This morning, I woke about 5 minutes before my alarm (I'm guessing, I didn't actually look at the time, but I know I'd been awake for a short bit before the alarm went off). That used to happen sometimes (during the past month, while W30 compliant), but has never happened since changing my "early" alarm to 5:30. I actually got to sleep a little later than I'd wanted to last night, also, which is a bit strange (late sleep and early waking) but I'll take it.

6:45
There's some gassiness this morning, but my cramps have subsided a bit. I don't know if that bodes well or ill where my cycle's concerned, but any reduction in pain is welcome in my book. I'm trying to wrap up my tracker chart to have it ready before this month's cycle starts, and also have to get everything now that we're shifting into February. I've procrastinated the meal planning, to boot, so today's going to be busy with planning the week's food and shopping, then actually doing the shopping and getting things home. I usually try to get the shopping finished on Thursdays since trash day is Friday, but oh well, I've resolved to cut myself some slack on this.

22:30
Today's been a bit of a whirlwind, just so much to do even when at the house (not to mention all the running to and fro to get groceries, attend appointments, pick up kids, etc.) My body's very tired, but my brain's fired up, and I'm currently trying to wind down so I can get some sleep. Looking forward to tomorrow.

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2 feb 2018 -- reintro day 3, compliance and preparation

Meal 1 -- 8:30
leftover beef, butternut squash, and cabbage

Meal 2 -- 13:30
big salad with carrots, cucumbers, grape tomatoes, and homemade dressing
tiny bowl of fruit (I would've put it in my salad but didn't want the vinaigrette on it)

Meal 3 -- 19:00
chicken breast, roasted carrots, and spiralized zucchini and yellow squash


I started out today with the intention of skipping caffeine all day, and things were going fine until about 2 hours after I woke up. A headache started, and I tried treating it with oils before going to a playdate for my 9yo... but those didn't do enough, so I took some OTC painkillers shortly after we arrived... and about an hour and a half later I was still feeling a lot of pain. The host mom offered coffee, so I accepted a small cup and sipped on it slowly. Within 20 minutes, my headache started abating. Luckily, it also helped with the cramps that had started earlier this morning.

Based on what I learned about this today, I'm going to slowly decrease the amount of coffee I consume over the next few days, leading up to completely skipping the morning coffee again (but after stepping it down rather than a cold-turkey approach). It may be that I can't remove caffeine entirely due to headaches, and I'm actually okay with that... but I would definitely like to know how little is necessary in order to help me avoid the worst of them, and whether it's better to go ahead and grab a cup in the morning or if I can use more of an as-needed method.

Tomorrow is another reintro day, and it'll be peas, so I'm going to make a beef and veggie gravy with mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli. I'm actually rather excited, because it's something we used to make a lot, so it should be something my 14yo will enjoy seeing. Granted, this time I'm making the gravy from scratch instead of using a gravy packet, but I've found that the gravies I've made since starting this journey have been quite good and I really don't think I'll ever go back to gravy packets (not even for the sake of au jus).

Since Sunday usually means a midday meal for the family whereas Monday is a DIY night, I'm thinking of making some soup tomorrow night to give myself the option of soup and salad on Monday.

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3 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 4: green peas

Meal 1 -- 8:45
3 eggs scrambled with onions, a handful of grape tomatoes, half an avocado, and 2 hands of 50/50 mix

Meal 2 -- 13:00
beef & vegetable (peas & carrots) gravy, mashed potatoes, and roasted broccoli

Meal 3 -- 19:00
Asian soup (ginger, scallions, mushrooms, chicken, daikon noodles)


I'm awake oddly early today. My wake-up time on weekdays is 5:30, and I just try to be up by 7:00 on Saturdays. But Sunday is my sleep-in day... I'm usually up around 8:00, but could stay in bed until 9:00 if my body decided to allow it. Today? Up at 5:50 to use the restroom, and then can't even fathom going back to sleep, so here I am wondering what on earth made that happen. I got about 7 hours of sleep, though, so I guess it was enough.

I've also decided that my attempts to reduce caffeine intake through coffee are going to have to wait until after I get through this month's cycle... I'm certain it's coming soon, and I honestly think it's going to be wisest to time that process a little better instead of just jumping in headfirst into the deep end.

Edging on toward afternoon, and getting ready to start cooking lunch soon. I'm feeling more irritable today, and wondering if it's just PMS or something more. A lot of effort is going into modulating my tone when responding, which is honestly exhausting, and my head's hurting a bit as well. Part of me thinks maybe I should put off the reintroduction to peas, but the other part really doesn't want to have to change my lunch plans since everything has already been prepped for the meal I wanted to do. Bleh.

Lunch was so nice. It's been quite a while since I've been able to fix the beef & veg gravy, and it was awesome to see my 14yo eat it. She doesn't often eat what I cook, but it does happen sometimes and this is one dish she almost always will eat. I've gotten leftovers together for dad's plate (to take to work tomorrow) and set the rest in another dish for my husband... I did snag out some potatoes and broccoli for myself, but will have to get a bit of protein to throw in with those. This way, though, I make sure I won't accidentally stray from compliance tomorrow, since the leftovers aren't in one of my trays.

It's now a couple of hours after lunch, and my head hurts. I think part of the head issues this weekend are from the weather being crazy... but I'm not sure if there are other factors as well. I feel like maybe I ate too much at lunch, also, even though it didn't feel that way at the time (I stopped right as I started feeling full, and even kept myself from taking "just a little more" from the pan while putting away leftovers).

We had a friend come over this evening, and she hung out with me in the kitchen while I cooked our soup and showed her how to make mayonnaise at home. She's wanting to learn to incorporate more healthful foods into her family's daily routine, but is very busy and I think she's scared of trying to take on too much. She does like what she's eaten with us, though, so hopefully we can manage something where I go help her once each week or so, at least until she starts feeling more comfortable in the kitchen.

Dinner was amazing. It was just me, my friend, and my dad, but we all wound up getting a small second portion (and they grabbed garlic bread to sop up their leftover broth). I did manage to save a little for tomorrow, but my mom might decide to have it as part of her lunch since she wasn't home from out of town until I'd already put up the leftovers and gotten dishes finished.

Still no cycle start, but it definitely feels like it's getting close (my app says tomorrow is "on time", so we'll see how that lines up with reality). I'm a little gassy, but not in a painful and bloated kind of way. It's a feeling I'll have to monitor a bit so I can try to determine if that's related to my cycle or if it's from the peas I ate today.

I'm feeling tired tonight around 9:30, so hopefully that bodes well for sleeping easily and waking refreshed. The girls are in school tomorrow, so it'll be a bright and early morning for me again.

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4 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 5, compliance and recovery

Meal 1 -- 8:45
huge bed of greens with 2 boiled eggs, grape tomatoes, half an avocado, and vinaigrette

Meal 2 -- 13:00
partial serving mashed potatoes, partial serving butternut squash, leftover broccoli, 2 boiled eggs with mayo

Meal 3 -- 18:00
baked potato and massive salad with boiled eggs, tomatoes, and raspberries


Last night, it was harder than usual to get to sleep. I also had slightly worse gas than has been "usual" through Whole30, which I'm leaning toward attributing to the peas at dinner (but can't discount PMS, either). I'm not sure whether having no starch at dinner threw anything off or not, but that's not typical for me (I usually have starch at breakfast or lunch, and also at dinner, but yesterday I only had it at lunch) so it's always possible. I'm going to make more of an effort to continue my usual starch intake though, because I've found that I sleep and feel much better that way compared to when I cut it down.

Once I got to sleep, I slept well. I woke up around 5:20 and stayed in bed until my 5:30 alarm. Felt very hungry right after waking, but kept to my normal routine and had coffee, then took 9yo to school, then returned home. Unfortunately, I forgot I had a morning meeting today, so I'd gotten 5 bites of salad before a text came in from one of the other participants asking if I was on my way. Whoops! The salad kept well in the fridge, though, and was very enjoyable when I did finally get back home to eat it!

I've been up almost 5 hours now, and so far I've only got a slight tension in the back of my skull, so hopefully I can avoid a headache for most of today (if not all) and feel up to going out to my weekly meeting tonight. I have missed it for several weeks now, and would love to bring it back into my routine.


I've seen people mention dipping eggs in mayonnaise, and decided to try it since my homemade mayo isn't totally disgusting like the store-bought stuff tastes to me. Never again, seriously. I realize it's the exact same ingredients that make up deviled eggs or egg salad (minus maybe some mustard), but oh heavens that was nowhere near palatable enough for me to eat it in the future. But I did try it, which is good for me, because I'm sometimes a little stuck on what I "don't like" and it prevents me from maybe finding new things that are good. That didn't happen this time, of course, but the experience counts!


I finally made it back to my recovery group meeting tonight, which was quite nice. I've missed the ladies there, and we had some good discussion. Doing the Whole30 and really buckling down to tackle the psychological underpinnings of my relationships with food is actually very similar to the recovery approach, so I feel like the experience of working through recovery in other areas has definitely helped me get more out of Whole30.

They always have dinner (pizza most nights, but tonight was a "home-cooked" meal), but I made sure to eat at home before leaving so I wouldn't be tempted. They also always have dessert, and I didn't even feel tempted. I'm not sure if that's because of some honeymoon phase I'm in now, or if I really did make that much progress against the sugar demons. I guess I'll have a better idea of that as I move forward in reintro and beyond, but it really gives me hope that I'm not feeling that pull right now.

I did have a little coffee while there, but I still feel like I'm winding down for bed at a normal time... hopefully I'll sleep fine, too. Next week I need to make sure I take a travel mug of hot tea, so I can skip the other stuff.

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1 hour ago, Jihanna said:

I've seen people mention dipping eggs in mayonnaise, and decided to try it since my homemade mayo isn't totally disgusting like the store-bought stuff tastes to me. Never again, seriously. I realize it's the exact same ingredients that make up deviled eggs or egg salad (minus maybe some mustard), but oh heavens that was nowhere near palatable enough for me to eat it in the future. But I did try it, which is good for me, because I'm sometimes a little stuck on what I "don't like" and it prevents me from maybe finding new things that are good. That didn't happen this time, of course, but the experience counts!

I like dipping mine in mustard. A little weird, but it's compliant and mixes it up from just plain hard boiled eggs every day.

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I usually just roll mine around in salt and pepper, then eat it plain (or cut it up and drop it on a salad), but figured I'd try something that would give it a bit more moisture. I might have to try the mustard idea (I actually wondered if mixing a good bit of mustard in with the mayo might help, but hadn't considered straight mustard for whatever reason).

I'd never heard of dukkah before starting Whole30, and just now actually looked up what it is... it looks like the kind of thing my husband would really enjoy, but the first recipe I pulled up is probably way too spicy for me. I did find one that doesn't include chili powder (and has some yummy other stuff added in, like turmeric), and that one looks promising if I leave out the cumin (we have a sensitivity in the house, so I haven't used cumin in a year or more). Thanks for the suggestions!

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5 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 6, beans

Meal 1 -- 9:30
2 fried eggs and a baked potato

Meal 2 -- 13:30
Barberito's burrito bowl, all the awesome stuff plus beans this time

Meal 3 -- 18:30
spaghetti squash and sauce, roasted broccoli, big plate of salad greens with dried cranberries


Briefly woke around 3:30 this morning, but was able to get back to sleep very easily and didn't wake again until just before the 5:30 alarm. I feel refreshed enough, but not as relaxed as I'd like to be when starting out a day. I have several things that must get done, and a few others I'd like to accomplish, but that's pretty typical.

We have an appointment this morning for my 9yo, which is scheduled right smack in the middle of when I would usually be getting home from taking her to school... which means right when I would normally eat breakfast. This doctor doesn't mind us eating int he waiting room, though, so at least I have the option to take something to eat.


My husband took me out to drop of business cards at a few places who want to help us get clients, then ran me over to Barberito's for lunch because I was starving and he wasn't ready to go home yet. I had a free entree that I'd planned to use tomorrow to do my bean reintro, but decided to do it today instead. I realize I only had 1 day between peas and beans this way, but since they're both legumes I'm okay with that.

Beans are probably something I don't need to eat even on occasion, if my stomach's reaction today is anything to go by. They didn't give me immediate gas or bloating (though by dinner it started), but it was like I was sitting right on the edge of feeling nauseated for hours -- I never got sick, nothing ever came up, and it wasn't exactly reflux... but I could feel a sort of imminent threat of nausea, which was just strange. That feeling passed, but now I'm just gassy and bloated, so I'm going to give at least 3 days before soy (I haven't even decided how to do it, since  I think most of my soy prior to W30 probably came from soy sauce and I'm happy to keep using coconut aminos, instead).

Dinner was delicious, and I totally don't miss noodles when eating marinara with spaghetti squash. I had hoped mom would manage to get green beans to go with it, but she grabbed broccoli... which tasted fine, and I'm not sick of the taste or anything, but eating it on the same day as beans might not have been the brightest idea. :D


I'm trying to get my meal plan and grocery list finished a day earlier than usual, so I can shop tomorrow and get the deals as soon as they're starting (rather than waiting until day 2, when some stuff will already be sold out, or the pickings are getting slim). Weekly deals at Sprouts also overlap on Wednesday, so I can get the best price between last week's sale and this week's.

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6 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 7, compliance & recovery

Meal 1 -- 8:30
2 boiled eggs, mashed sweet potato, and a large salad

Meal 2 -- 14:00
leftover spaghetti squash and sauce, with roasted broccoli

Meal 3 -- 19:30
skillet chicken tenderloins with onion, red bell pepper, and mushrooms


I've been so busy today, I hadn't even sat down to type anything up about the day until now, at 9pm. Just wow. Feeling very productive overall, but also realize I didn't actually get everything done that I'd wanted to do... so hopefully I'll have the chance to really sit and focus tomorrow, to get a few tasks wrapped up so they don't just keep hanging on.

My energy level has been pretty consistent all day, which is definitely nice. I skipped adding a starch to dinner tonight, so I'm going to have to see how I fare overnight and into tomorrow with only one starch today. When I'd tried doing one starch per day previously, I felt a bit off-balanced and foggy, but I am still experimenting. Today was just one sweet potato, whereas before it was white potato, so we'll see if that seems to make a difference.

Still waiting for my cycle to decide to get here. I've been feeling the signs for about a week now, which doesn't usually happen quite like this, so it's interesting to me that there's so much build-up to the main event this time. Part of me wonders if I should be afraid... very afraid...

Although I haven't been feeling tired throughout the day, I definitely do feel it now, so I'm going to start winding down and getting ready for sleep.

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another busy day that led to forgetting to post before I slept...

 

7 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 8, compliance & recovery

Meal 1 -- 9:00
leftover meat & chunky veggie sauce with baked potato chunks

Meal 2 -- 13:00
huge salad with boiled eggs and veggies

Meal 3 -- 18:00
burgers, portobello mushrooms, roasted sweet potato, roasted summer squash


I've been having some issues with getting over the effects of beans... I'm thinking maybe 3+ days in between will work best, for the rest of the legume testing at the very least. Since beans were tested Tuesday, that would mean peanuts could be done tomorrow (Friday), but I think I'm going to put that off until Saturday to give an extra day of recovery first, and then 3 days before soy on the next Wednesday. Instead of making meals that incorporate the ingredients, I'll be having them separately or mixing them in on my own plate. That way, the ingredient can easily be limited to that one day and take a form more likely for me to use (i.e. sliced apples and peanut butter, instead of peanut sauce or a sandwich).

Last night's sleep reminded me very much of my pre-Whole30 sleep, and I didn't like it. I used to wake often and flip my pillow and/or turn over. This kept my head/neck cooler and repositioned me throughout the night, leaving less chance that I'd wake with my neck cramped up or something. The problem is that it also prevented me from getting really deep sleep, so I never woke up feeling quite as rested as I thought I should've been. Last night, it was back to the waking every 1-2 hours and tossing about. I wasn't uncomfortable, I just couldn't manage to stay asleep for an extended period. When my alarm went off, I literally rolled off the bed and just sat there a minute, trying to decide if it was worth it to lay back down until 5:45 instead (I did actually stand up a moment later and go about my usual morning routine, though).

Since my Whole30 was done during colder weather and now my area is trying very hard to look like summer (we have had temps in the high 70s for the past 2 days and today is supposed to his 82), it's possible that my sleep is being plagued by the warmer weather. My room doesn't have amazing insulation, so it does get warm despite sleeping with a fan on (but I didn't FEEL overheated, or I would've turned said fan up and/or added another one, because yes I do have 2 different fans to use, haha). Or maybe it's bean-related, or cycle-related, or just due to my husband being unable to sleep... since every time I woke up, he was still awake, until finally around 4 or 5 I started to talk to him and he snapped at me. So I don't even know where to begin on that one.

What I do know is that I need my restful sleep back, and it's going to be interesting to see if things go back to a good level of restfulness after reintro even if the temps are higher again at that point.


I'm getting easily irritated today, which could be PMS, lack of sleep, combo of both, or something else entirely. It's annoying, regardless of what's behind it, because it shouldn't take so much effort to not be a witch.


We had company over this evening, and wound up chatting until well after I started feeling tired, but I'm still going to bed before 11pm, so I'm happy enough with that.

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8 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 9, compliance & recovery

Meal 1 -- 9:45
leftover burgers and mushrooms, squash, and sweet potato

Meal 2 -- 13:00
massive salad with 1 boiled egg and some grilled chicken
fruit cup (to avoid getting the dressing on my fruit)

Meal 3 -- 19:00
skillet beef and onions, roasted acorn squash, and green beans with bacon


I slept much better last night (soundly enough that I actually woke up with a sore neck), but decided to let myself have an extra 15 minutes after the first alarm before I got out of bed. My head started hurting as soon as I opened my eyes, so I took some Aleve with my morning med dose. Breakfast was delayed because my 14yo had an appointment this morning, and I was nearly ready to slaughter an entire cow by the time I got home to eat. Next time there's a morning appointment, I need to remind myself to eat something before I leave, even if it's just a boiled egg.

I'd considered doing peanut butter today, since I finally feel like I'm normalized enough to do another reintro, but decided to stick with the plan and do it tomorrow just to be on the safe side.

My lunch today was big enough that I'm still not hungry 4 hours later... not necessarily a bad thing, as my dad will work late tonight so I can delay dinner a little, if I want. I'll probably start cooking around the time I would normally be trying to finish everything up.


I'm so tired. We had a family Netflix night and watched Incredibles 2 with our daughters, which was very nice. It's always good to be able to have fun with them, see/hear them laugh, and generally just share an experience as a family. We're trying to do that kind of thing more often (not necessarily with tv/movie, but in general), and it seems to be making a real impact with the girls. Of course, now they're wired and I'm ready to pass out!

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9 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 10, still just compliance

Meal 1 -- 10:00
3 fried eggs and leftover veggies (acorn squash and green beans) from last night

Meal 2 -- 13:30
big salad with 2 boiled eggs and homemade mayo-based dressing

Meal 3 -- 19:30
no-bean chili with potatoes and a salad


Whoa... I just got 10 hours of sleep, haha. During the week, I'm at my best when I go to bed by 23:00 (11pm) and get up at 05:45. Note the wording there -- "go to bed" -- sometimes I fall asleep quickly, but other nights it takes a little more time. Some nights I'm in bed an hour before my goal and pass out almost immediately. My point here, really, is just that I've found a balance. If I'm "resting" by 23:00, I will almost invariably wake up refreshed at 05:45; if I stay in bed until 06:00, I can feel the difference and it does affect the rest of my morning while I'm trying to get kids up and ready to go.

Weekends, however, are an entirely different story. I still try to get in bed by 23:00, but unless I've made plans to go somewhere in the morning, I let myself sleep until I wake up naturally. Last night was one of those 22:00 ones, where I fell asleep quickly and easily... and this morning I got out of bed just before 08:00. I was already awake, but it was chilly so I stayed under the covers for a little longer (and got to snuggle with my 14yo when she came in to get permission to listen to music this morning).

I do feel like maybe 10 hours was a little much, but I don't feel totally horrible physically. There's a headache just brewing around my temples, so I'm going to try to knock that out with some Aleve, but otherwise I feel good.


Had a friend over for a few hours this morning, and wound up getting a later breakfast than I'd planned for due to waiting at her house before bringing her over... and had lunch only a few hours later, instead of the usual 4-5, but did feel hungry enough to eat at that point and it kept me on track for our normal time for dinner.


Today was meant to be a peanut reintro, but there wasn't any point during the day when I felt like doing it, so I'll plan to work it in tomorrow and shift my soy reintro day forward by one as well.

Despite the 10 hours of sleep, and a relatively easy day, I'm tired well ahead of 22:00... so I'm heading to bed soon, and hopefully can wake up nearer to a normal time tomorrow (while still allowing my body to guide me on that front, rather than an alarm going off at a specific time).

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10 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 11, peanuts

Meal 1 -- 13:00
pork loin, braised greens, roasted butternut
apple slices with peanut butter

Meal 2 -- 19:00
2 burgers (10 oz pre-cooked), sauteed onions and mushrooms
small serving of sweet potato
small bowl of salad greens


I think I need to start getting up at 5:45 or 6:00 on weekend mornings, instead of letting myself sleep as long as my body might want... if I feel like I need more sleep, I can nap during the day or (better yet) go to bed earlier. What's happening is that my eating habits are thrown off on weekends because of sleeping so late. I don't eat breakfast until a couple of hours after I wake up, which is usually fine because I can eat at 8:30 and still have a good period of time between that and a reasonable lunch time, which leaves room between that and dinner. If waking at 8, though, I'm not hungry for breakfast until 10 or 11, which shuffles everything else... and it's truly not good on Sundays, when our "family meal" is scheduled for 1pm. I can't do anything about the timing of lunch on Sundays, because that's just how my parents do things (and they don't want a big dinner on Sundays), so I've got to re-arrange my own sleeping schedule to accommodate this, instead.

Alternatively, I could try eating as soon as I'm out of bed, but I've never been one of those people who can do that... despite the recommendations for Whole30. I don't know. I think I want to try the sleep schedule change as my first line of attack, and see if that helps before I start trying to eat before I'm feeling hungry in the morning.


Apple slices and peanut butter. It's about the only way I could think of that I would use peanut butter in everyday life that wouldn't leave me with any leftovers. I don't eat much peanut butter overall, really -- I go through phases where I'm a PB junkie, and then phases where I can't even stand the smell of it, but even leading up to Whole30 I'd been cutting back on it. I did have to keep reminding myself not to lick my fingers after making a sandwich for my youngest, though!

Oh, that pork was so good! I'm going to have to remember the recipe, and how I tweaked it! So delicious! Using just kale worked fine, too, at least for me and my dad (my husband was "okay" with it, but said that they were a little bit too lemony for him this time).


My dad kept making comments about how nice a "really messy bacon cheeseburger" would be... I said better would be a messy bacon mushroom burger... and my husband stepped in to make us some burgers, served up with sauteed onions and mushrooms. Hubby had bread with his, and he and dad both grabbed cheese, but mine was slathered with homemade ketchup and eaten with a fork!

There will be no meal 3 for me tonight. I know dad plans to eat his other burger before bed, but I can't do the eat right before I lay down thing, it causes reflux for me so I avoid that at all costs. I'll just have to try to approach next weekend differently with my wake-up times, so I can keep myself on a better eating schedule overall.

The small amount of peanut butter I had this afternoon didn't seem to affect me at all, until this evening when I had some gas that wasn't entirely pleasant feeling or smelling. It wasn't BAD, but it wasn't comfortable, either. Based on just today's reaction, I could probably manage to do peanuts occasionally, but I can just as easily avoid them so it's not really a big deal.

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11 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 12, recovery

Meal 1 -- 8:30
leftovers from last night (pork loin, butternut, kale)

Meal 2 -- 13:30
leftover chili and a salad

Meal 3 -- 20:00
chicken tenderloins, salad greens, and a bit of sweet potato
small bowl of fresh pineapple (about the size of my cupped hand)


To anyone reading this that isn't me -- warning: today's post is going to be a little more graphic than usual, since I'm dealing with some aggravated symptoms that I usually don't write about. Keep reading at your own risk.

Yesterday's excursion into the world of peanut butter had no really noticeable effects (except maybe some gas that smelled worse than usual), but last night between posting yesterday's log and going to bed, I came across something I think might be related to the peanut consumption.

I've dealt with hemorrhoids for the past handful(ish) of years. Some days they're more enlarged than others, and some days they're practically non-existent. Some days they itch like crazy, other days I barely remember they're even present. They've always been pretty mild in severity, never bad enough for me to run for OTC ointments or suppositories (except a hefty supply of Tucks pads when I was pregnant and for a few months after birth). Under normal circumstances, topical application of coconut oil has been enough to handle any irritation from them.

Until last night.

I might've experienced this type of pain before, but I don't remember it (and it was probably alongside the feels of healing stitches and whatnot). My hemorrhoids are definitely more enlarged than they normally ever get, and one seems to have come out of nowhere. I've bought cream and wipes today, and if I don't see some changes for the better over the next 24-48 hours, I'll be visiting the doctor because the never-had-it-before one is the one that hurts the most (and I'm honestly scared to death of the idea of having a blood clot there).

So... I might try peanut butter again in the future, but right now all additional reintro is on hold until this is fixed, so I'm able to start on a clean slate.


Moving on -- I'm craving chocolate and soda, today. I'm REALLY hoping this is a sign of my cycle starting, since I've not craved either one of those things since day 3 of my Whole30 (during my last period, which probably isn't a coincidence) ... and not only have I been having various PMS symptoms for 14 days now, I'm also a week late according to my typical (pre-W30) cycle stats. I have a feeling that part of what's throwing everything off is reintro, though, so I probably won't have a real idea of what my cycle will look like until after I'm through this stage and in the groove of my post-W30 plans.

Paleo is still the plan, most likely with fewer forays into non-paleo items than I originally thought might happen. I'll be keeping white potatoes in my diet, though it won't be as often as I ate them pre-W30 (when I didn't mix up my starches, I just did lots of potatoes and sometimes sweets, not to mention lots of rice and pasta).

Oh, for the record, yes I am eating some dark chocolate today. I also allowed myself some safe carbonation, to give the feel of soda without completing killing my system. I'm hoping my body takes the hint and shuts down all the craving nonsense.


Evening falls and now it's just a matter of getting my kids to finally go to sleep. My dinner was super-simple, but very satisfying. Tonight was a DIY for the household, so I didn't have to deal with a big meal for everyone... all of the dishes from everyone else are sitting in the kitchen, of course, but I already told my mom that I'm not washing anything tonight (if they're still there come morning, I'll do them when I'm home after kids are at school, but I really dislike having to do dishes on a DIY night when I already wash every night that I actually cook AND I made sure the drainboard was clear before they started doing their own things... so...)

Anyway, I'm tired and in pain, and although the stuff I bought earlier is helping somewhat, it's definitely not giving me any sense of "oh it's getting better, yay!". But, it'll give me enough relief that I can sleep, and that's really the most important part at this point... tomorrow's a new day, and who knows what healing can happen while I'm one with my mattress and pillow?

My cycle still hasn't shown face, and the strangest part is that my 14yo's cycle is thrown off also... hers typically starts about a week before mine, so if I expected mine a week ago then we would've expected hers 2 weeks ago. That wouldn't be so odd except that she didn't even do the Whole30 with me, she's just continued to eat what she's always done, so it's slightly amusing that we're both so out of whack right now.

I'm going to try to get to bed a little earlier than 11pm tonight, so I can try to get a little more sleep than usual. I took some ibuprofen to help with at least part of the pain issue, so hopefully I can get to sleep quickly and not just lay there hurting until I pass out.

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12 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 13, recovery

Meal 1 -- 9:00
leftover pork loin, kale, and butternut

Meal 2 -- 13:00
I actually forget what I ate... it's been a crazy day

Meal 3 -- 18:00
barbecue chicken, roasted carrots, roasted broccoli


I wanted so badly to stay in bed this morning. I feel so tired and really just want to sleep, but I'm pushing myself to be up and at 'em because there's just stuff that I have to do. I'm feeling less pain today, but uncomfortable in most positions, so that's only marginally better. There's enough difference that I'm hopeful, though, which says a lot compared to how I felt Sunday evening.


Today's been absolutely insane. We wound up extremely busy with business-related stuff, an unexpected but welcome kind of busy... but it wore me out. Add in a friend visiting for dinner and some TV, and by the time I'm finally home, with clean dishes, I'm tired as all heck. I still need a shower before sleep. I'm still in a bit of pain, and I'm going to be taking meds before I rest. I really, really hope I feel rested come morning, because I've got to get my meal plan and grocery list finalized as early as possible so I can get that knocked out before anything else unexpected pops up.

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13 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 14, recovery

Meal 1 -- 14:00
1/2 lb grass-fed burger with mushrooms, onions, and onions sauteed in coconut aminos

Meal 2 -- 20:00
Genghis Grill bow (beef, cabbage, pineapple, orange, roasted red pepper, green bell pepper, green onion, white onion, spinach, basil, mushrooms, ginger, garlic, salt, pepper)


Okay, today's been really strange so far. I really didn't feel hungry at all until I was at the grocery store doing my weekly shopping (well, part of it, still have 2 stores to hit later)... and though I did LOOK at snacky stuff, I did not come home with it (I even passed up the salad bar because I can build my own at home for cheaper). Now that I'm home, I can tell I'm hungry but I can't for my life figure out what the heck to eat. I don't want a salad, or boiled eggs, or anything of the sort. I don't want leftover bbq from last night, I don't want the leftover vegetables. I really DO want a hamburger, but I don't want to have to cook it, lol... or a cabbage bowl, which I don't want to pay for. The biggest problem is that there's an underlying sense of nausea, as if it's threatening to hit full-force if I eat the wrong thing or when it doesn't say it's okay to grab food.

Ahem, should be interesting.

Meanwhile, my 14yo finally started her cycle so I'm (totally irrationally) hoping that means mine's coming soon... not that I enjoy it, or really WANT it, just because I need to know if I'm going to be on any kind of a predictable schedule and if anything is changing in the severity of it. These are things I need to be able to prepare for, and it's driving me a little batty that I don't know what to expect or even when to expect it. It's like being on red alert 24/7, and it's honestly exhausting.


I did finally manage to eat, thankfully... and I felt much better each time. I don't usually eat quite as late as I did tonight, but with already being thrown off and knowing I needed food before sleep, I happily agreed to go out with a friend this evening. My face still feels stuffed, my throat and ear are both sore from the drainage, but I'm feeling better in general and don't have waves of nausea at the moment, so I'm happy. Still no cycle, which is whatever it is right now, I give up trying to figure out what's going to happen with that. PMSing for 16 days isn't anywhere near the ballpark of my idea of fun, though, so I hope my body sorts itself sooner rather than later.

I wanted early sleep, but going out nixed that plan. I'll have to deal with heading to my pillow shortly, knowing I should be tired enough to fall asleep quickly. Tomorrow I need to be prepared to make sure I eat three actual meals regardless of how I feel about food at any given time.

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Well, I finished typing last night but forgot to post... realized that as soon as I saw my little notepad file where I keep my daily ramblings until I copy them over (it was still full, and I always clear it to a template for the following day if I've posted). Anyway, Happy Valentine's day to everyone :)

 

14 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 15, Valentine's day and yet more recovery

Meal 1 -- 10:00
fried eggs and sweet potato

Meal 2 -- 17:00
beef and summer squash soup
roasted eggplant

Meal 3 -- 22:00
egg white of a boiled egg, tiny banana, sipped on broth


It's official: I'm sick. For now, the congestion is still in my head, which means I need to be careful and try to keep it out of my chest. Unfortunately, sinus drainage has already made my throat sore and it's stuffed up my ear in the process. I'm taking medication when able, decongestants and also some ibuprofen to help with the pain and any inflammation... and I think I'll pull out the nose spray today. My 14yo says she's feeling sick, too, so I have to make a decision to either keep her home or send her in -- neither of my girls has school tomorrow or Monday, though (and the 9yo is also out on Tuesday). We'll see.

I didn't feel like going to Kroger yesterday, so I did a thing -- I used ClickList. They keep trying to get people to use it, and the first 3 times are free, so I figured why not try it out... though I did wait for a grocery trip when I wasn't going to be buying lots of fresh produce and meats, since I'd really rather go in and pick those out for myself instead of relying on their employee's judgment. Even still, I did include the broccoli, cauliflower, and cabbage on this list, so I'll have to wait and see if I like what they grab for me. I'm scheduled for my pickup this morning between 8 and 9, so I figure I'll drop my 9yo off at school and then go swing by the grocery store instead of coming straight home. I'm kind of excited :)


Grocery pick-up went well, but I realized when I got there that I needed to have the method of payment on me, just in case. So I had to rush downtown to get that from Dad, and since I'd be passing by the house anyway, I stopped and the husband took me back up to the store (easier to load groceries into his truck than my car). I'll probably use ClickList again, just because it was actually pretty darn easy and it prevented me from having to walk through the whole store myself (because I've got people in the house who are decidedly NOT limiting their diets to Whole30, I do actually have to walk many aisles of the store rather than skirt the edges). That was nice, and we were able to benefit from some online sales that I couldn't have gotten in the store, too. Will consider it when it's time to do next week's shopping, for sure (even what little produce I ordered was picked out nicely, though I'd have preferred more broccoli so I guess next time I'll have to dictate a preferred total weight).


My husband has a business, and we scheduled a couple of jobs for this evening... totally not realizing that it's Valentine's Day. So instead of going out to eat or anything like that, we spent our evening together - him doing his work, and me keeping him company (and making sure none of his equipment walked off with anyone else, since we were downtown). We saw a LOT of people strolling the walks, which isn't uncommon really but I think there was probably more foot traffic than usual because of the day, plenty of people walking hand-in-hand. We even handed out a card - one woman commented that she needed that (pressure washing) done to her house, so I offered her a card and a flyer with our current promotion on it. We need lots more business, but getting the work done tonight is a big step in the right direction.

I'm so tired from all that, though, and still feeling sick, so not eating much. I did at least make sure I got a good dinner (with soup, yummm) but my stomach was rebelling at the idea of eating before sleep... and knowing I'd sleep so soon after getting home, I didn't want to eat much anyway. So, it is what it is, and tomorrow can maybe be better (subject to the tyranny of my sinuses, of course).

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15 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 16, still more recovery

Meal 1 -- 11:00
leftover beef and summer squash soup
small salad of lettuce, carrots, and tomatoes

Meal 2 -- 20:30
turkey, sausage, and brisket
green beans, potato salad


So apparently peanut butter and soy really do a number on me. I didn't officially do soy, but I realized today that there was some in something I ate the other day... I MIGHT decide to go ahead and reintro both things again at a later point, but I think part of me actually doesn't mind letting them go (I'm sure that will change as soon as I start craving one of my "usuals" from our favorite Chinese place, so soy at least might be worth testing again). I really do hope that SOMETHING in everything we took out for Whole30 is actually going to be okay for me thought, at least on an occasional basis, because there are some things I'd rather not have to decide "is it worth it" before choosing to eat them (not that they'd be put back into every day or even every week rotation, but I'd love to be able to just say "Oh, it's been 6 months since I had _____, I think I'd like some" and not have to question whether I'm willing to put up with whatever issues it would cause).

Last night was crazy. I got home, barely ate, came upstairs, and fell into bed. Then I woke up over 10 hours later (kids are out of school so I did at least make sure I wasn't going to have an alarm go off at 5:30). Crazy! I do feel like I got good sleep, mostly, so I'm praying that helps my body with fighting off all this gunky sinus junk.


I've got a low-thrum headache today, but I'm kind of assuming it's due to being sick... I know beyond doubt that's why my neck and shoulders are so tense, and why I'm sleeping so oddly... so it stands to reason that maybe the headache stems from that, too. Knowing why doesn't make it any less annoying, of course, but at least it lets me decide the best medicine to take to combat it.

My original plan for tonight's dinner was fish, but I really don't think I could stomach cooking or eating it just now, so I'm putting that off. I'm thinking I might do spaghetti squash with a creamy garlic sauce (made with cauliflower puree) that I've been wanting to try. My friend who sometimes comes over for dinner is wanting to see how you cook a spaghetti squash, so it'd be a perfect chance to show her (I usually do mine in my pressure cooker, but told her I'd roast them in the oven next time so she can see how she'd need to do it her house).


Dinner didn't get cooked tonight. That friend asked us to help her look at some used cars that she was wanting our opinions on the vehicles, the deal she was getting, etc. Looking at cars turned into test drives and then into actually buying a car to drive off the lot... and what we thought might be a 2 hour adventure turned into 4 hours. I hadn't eaten before leaving because I thought it would be quick enough and we'd run grab something to eat and hold us over until I cooked dinner at home. That didn't happen, of course. I was starved by the time we left from the dealership, and it would've taken me at least 1.5 hours to cook (and it was already late), so my friend treated us to dinner out instead (and we're planning to do our social dinner at my house tomorrow night, instead).

The downside to tonight's dinner is that I'm 99% certain I ate at least 1 thing that I shouldn't have eaten. It tasted amazing, but I'll probably pay for it later/tomorrow. I'll definitely be doing at least 7 days straight of strict Whole30 to reset before I attempt a new reintroduction.

It's much later than I usually would've stayed up, but I also woke up much later than usual, and it's actually about the same length of day relatively-speaking. I do need to try to wake a little earlier tomorrow, though, so I can get myself back on a decent schedule before next week hits... and I really need to focus on getting three meals in, before it becomes habit to go so long between meals and/or only eat 2 in a given day. I'm hoping that it's sinus issues/illness contributing toward these issues with meals and eating appropriately, too, because then it should be easier to remedy the situation once I'm feeling better... but I also know I need to work on it before then, since I've got no idea when I'll start feeling better. Today my ear hurt less, but overall still the same as before.

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16 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 17

Meal 1 -- 9:00
egg and tomato

Meal 2 -- 13:45
lettuce-wrapped burger with tomato, homemade ketchup, and mustard
fried potatoes (a handful of slices) and baked sweet potato (1/3)

Meal 3 -- 19:30
spaghetti squash and creamy garlic cauli-sauce with chicken and mushrooms
green beans


I stayed up WAY later than I should've last night (way, way later), in part because I drank coffee while we were waiting for everything to get wrapped up at the car dealership (with my friend). We came home and socialized after grabbing a bite to eat, and then watched an episode of a show we're half-binging together whenever she comes over and we have time. I woke up at a halfway decent hour (for the weekend) though, and still snagged plenty of sleep (7.5 hours), so I'm happy enough. I just need to make sure I don't make a habit of drinking any caffeinated stuff so late in the day from now on (anything after 2pm is probably too late, and maybe the cut-off should be even earlier than that).

Lunch was a little carb-heavy compared to what I'd usually do, but it was something special for the family since my parents won't be here for tonight's dinner... I'm hoping my friend is able to come for dinner, though. I really enjoy having her visit in general, and it's always fun to have her help out and learn in the kitchen. Sharing it all, the whole cooking experience, really increases the enjoyment factor for me.

I'm really bad about procrastination, especially with certain things... like putting away clean laundry. I washed a few loads of laundry like 4 or 5 days ago, and I've just now put away A's and ours (mine and DH's). I've got one load in the wash and another in the dryer, and also need to wash a load of towels and one of linens... and need to make a real effort to get everything put away immediately this time. After all that, J can do her laundry, and I'll come back behind her doing A's current dirty ones at the end.

If I can make myself do it, I should get the kitchen floor mopped today or tomorrow, and the upstairs (where the four of us reside) really needs some vacuum visitation soon... which means I'm pushing the girls to get the floor in their areas clean so I can do all of it at once, instead of having to lug the vacuum upstairs and then wait for the chance to actually use it. While I've got it up here, I might beg DH to go ahead and clean our ceiling fan(s), too, because I'm sneezing like crazy today and they're dusty as all heck.


Oh man, dinner was good! I made sure everyone knew it was a creamy garlic sauce made from cauliflower, not with any actual dairy, so no one would think it should taste like Alfredo despite looking similar... but it was really quite tasty! (When talking about it, my dad and I jokingly said we should call it Spaghetti Squash Alberto instead of calling it fake Alfredo, lol!) I didn't think it had quite enough flavor punch by following the recipe exactly, but it was close to perfect after adding another few shakes of garlic, pepper, and salt, and probably a little less than a full extra tablespoon of nutritional yeast. I think next time we might have to add some onion and bell pepper into the mix, I think it'd go quite well with the sauteed ingredients.

Jules and I watched the rest of season one of our show, and then I drove her home. Again, a bit later than I am really needing to get to bed at night, but at least it's the weekend and there's no school Monday... I do need to talk with her soon about making sure we get her home earlier when she visits, though, so we can have time but without having my sleep suffer as result of visiting.

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17 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 18

Meal 1 -- 8:30
leftover beef and summer squash soup

Meal 2 -- 13:00
beef, onion, and bell pepper stir-fry with cauli-rice
leftover hamburger, 1/3 sweet potato, and green beans

Meal 3 -- 18:30
leftover stir-fry from this afternoon
mashed sweet potato


Ever since the day of the peanut butter, I've had painful and itchy hemorrhoids that just won't go away. I'm using ointment, and I'm beginning to think I'm going to have to also use a laxative daily for a little while, to see if that'll let me get through a few days without making them worse. Meanwhile, I'm dying because I keep trying to drink warmer beverages instead of just having ice and water, but it's so warm in the house that I'm kept in a constant state of sweating. Who knows, maybe that'll have something of a sauna effect and weight will melt off... as if :D The only thing I've probably had in my diet on most days is a little extra sugar, since even if I'm not adding it in, I've had a tendency to eat a bit more fruit than I did in January. I seriously have got to figure out how to get this under control, though, because it hurts to sit or stand for extended periods of time.

I actually managed to eat within an hour of waking today, which is pretty crazy (for me). I figured the easiest way to try to start that would be to eat around my usual time even if it's right after I get out of bed, since at least I am used to that TIME for a meal. I'm considering making one of those "egg muffin" type recipes to see if those will work for me on my early mornings (I'd ideally like to get up at 5:30 and grab breakfast at 6:00).


Lunch was enjoyable. I used the rest of the cauliflower I riced yesterday (used part for the sauce I made in last night's dinner), and didn't even miss the texture of "real" rice in the dish. I'm finding that's pretty standard for me since starting Whole30. I might miss the idea of something being on my plate, but I've found that I don't usually miss the actual flavor or mouth-feel of it. We reheated some leftovers to go with it, which meant mom and dad were able to try the cauli-sauce from last night (both liked it). My cauliflower-abhoring husband ate more of the leftovers from last night as well, which was nice to see... he really liked it, too.


My cycle has FINALLY started. According to my app, it's 13 days later than expected. It's light so far, which is pretty typical for me, but my head's been hurting since I woke this morning and I took a very unexpected nap from 2pm to 5pm... naps in general aren't typical for me, but during my cycle all bets are off. I'm curious to see how this one looks when compared to my last one (very beginning of January). I also find it interesting that my 14yo's cycle was delayed like mine was, so that we continued to be staggered by about a week (she started sometime last week and has already finished) even though she didn't change her diet like I did. So strange.


My head still hurts, but not badly enough that I'm nauseated... so food is settling well. I'm slightly stuffy again, compared to earlier today, but still nowhere near as bad as it was in previous days. I'm looking forward to this passing, and hoping I don't get more sick first. Overall, this has been a much different experience than what's happened in past years, especially with sickness during winter, so I'm hoping that's a good diet-related sign.

There's no school tomorrow for any of the kids in the area (youngest is out on Tuesday, too, but her school is part of the state charter system so doesn't have to follow the county's educational calendar). We've got a few appointments on both of those days, though, so it'll be busy! Tomorrow night is my recovery group meeting, which I missed last week because it hurt too much to sit and the chairs there aren't soft... I'm hoping to go but really am scared I'll end up having to leave due to discomfort, so we'll see.

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18 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 19

Meal 1 -- 9:30
3 fried eggs and baked sweet potato

Meal 2 -- 14:00
2 boiled eggs and baked white potato, a few salad greens

Meal 3 -- 18:45
half-pound burger with sauteed onions
big salad with tomatoes, blackberries, and mandarin orange slices


Woke this morning to discover that although the Aleve allowed me to sleep last night, my headache is still with me today. I did allow myself to sleep in until I felt like I'd die if I stayed in bed longer, but more because I know that sometimes helps with cycle-related lethargy than out of any hope that it might help my head. If it's still here come Friday, I'll have to set a chiro appointment for next week.

It's Monday, which means it's a "day off" in my home kitchen. I did offer to go to my friend's house and help her get something cooked this evening IF she's off work (she works as needed, so can be asked to come in when they need her even if it's really short notice, which makes it hard to plan sometimes but we try). Either way, I am out of my own kitchen, which I do need occasionally... no idea if anyone will cook anything I can actually eat, but I'm more than capable of making my own dinner if it comes to it.


I'm drained of energy and food in general is unappealing just now. I'm glad I don't have to cook tonight, since it usually doesn't go well when I need to cook but have no real appetite or taste for what I'm preparing. I've loaded up on starchy veg so far today, but probably won't have much if any at dinner tonight, despite knowing I usually need it at dinner to sleep well... I don't think anything's going to affect my quality of sleep one way or the other just now, apart from my cycle, so with or without a starch at dinner I expect I'll sleep the same (in pain and trying to find comfortable positions for a bit, before I have to change).


After dinner, my friend came over to hang out for a while. We're watching TV until time for her to leave, and then I'll be heading to bed. J goes back to school tomorrow, and A has an appointment at 9:30, so I'll be back to my normal morning routine.

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19 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 20

Meal 1 -- 9:00
boiled egg and banana

Meal 2 -- 15:30
baked sweet potato

Meal 3 -- 18:30
chicken, roasted summer squash, mashed potatoes


Although today is an earlier morning than I've had to hvae while the kids were on break these past few days, the schedule today isn't structured quite like a normal school day because my youngest is still out. J usually sets an alarm for 5:45, so I got up to check on her and she wanted to sleep until 6:20. I started the ice machine, then laid back down until my 6:20 alarm (never went back to sleep, just rested). Once the 6:20 alarm went off, I got her up, checked the weather report (it'll be getting cooler, with a 10 degree drop from midday to overnight tonight), and got my coffee pot started up. We chilled for about 30 minutes, then I waited with her for her bus... and had a little "me time" before getting A up at 8:00. She's got an appointment later, so we'll leave the house about 9:00.

I love nice, easy-going mornings like today. The downside to today is that my cramps are on overdrive and I'm not at all hungry, which I know is going to throw me off with food later. I plan to at least grab a boiled egg and a handful of lettuce, and see how I feel about food when I get home from this morning's appointment.


I didn't end up going to my meeting last night... just way too much pain (cramps, hemorrhoids) and "blah"-ness, fatigue, etc. Probably should've gone anyway, would've been nice to see the ladies again, but just couldn't see myself going when it came time to leave. Some weeks I make it, others I don't, it's all good.


Today was another "man, it's just hard to eat" day. I wasn't ever actually hungry feeling, until grabbing a sweet potato to hold me over until dinner time. I did have coconut oil on it, so at least it was carb and fat, but missing protein totally for that one... made up for it with dinner, but my body probably doesn't see it that way.

With A heading back to school tomorrow, I'm trying to get the girls into bed a little earlier than usual in hopes that it'll lead to an easier morning with them both. We did another ClickList order for groceries this time, and this week we're buying a LOT less than usual... mostly meat, to carry us through the next week, since we've already got a lot of roll-over in the way of starchy vegetables and Mom will pick up other veggies from the market during the week instead of getting a bunch of them from the grocer tomorrow.

Meanwhile, I've got to manage to sleep tonight. I've been in a really irritable mood all day, trying very hard not to snap at people over nothing... I'm fairly certain that it's partially cycle-related but also partially related to the lack of decent food schedule I've had today, since I'd noticed in the past that I can usually manage moodiness with a few simple steps in terms of my food intake. Since that's not happened today, it's pretty safe to assume that's at least part of the force behind the witchiness. Sleep should help, I hope.

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20 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 21

Meal 1 -- 8:30
leftover chicken, summer squash, and mashed potatoes

Meal 2 -- 13:00
3 fried eggs, mashed sweet potatoes

Meal 3 -- 18:30
spaghetti squash with spaghetti sauce, green beans cooked in bone broth


Sleep was definitely not affected affected much last night. Sure, I'm a little more tired than I got used to being in January, but I also expect that because of my cycle (I almost always feel like I'm half a step from hibernation for my cycle, and my moodiness this time probably makes people wish I had just stayed in bed yesterday). I can't stay in bed today either, though it doesn't look like a busy day on paper... take A to school, pick up groceries, get J's prescriptions, go with husband downtown (if he goes), and get dinner on the table this evening. The trip downtown involves a lot of walking, however (passing out flyers to local businesses in hopes that we can get a few more jobs lined up before it's time to pay the next set of bills.

I really would love to stay in bed, though. I'm tired and cranky and can already feel a headache tugging at the edges of my sanity. Once I'm through hell week, maybe I'll slide back into strict "no added sugar" living to see where that takes me in terms of headaches, happiness, and overall health.


I've realized that I haven't been reading It Starts With Food like I've wanted to, in part because I haven't had any days where I'm sitting in the car line waiting for A to get out of school... and that's my usual reading time. I need to get this book (and hopefully Food Freedom Forever) finished before my renewal period ends and I have to turn them back in at the library! So I'm reading this morning...

...and realizing that I've been sabotaging myself in the mornings by drinking coffee when I get up, which I now know has been suppressing my appetite, which is WHY I haven't been getting hungry after getting up! Starting tomorrow, I follow the rule in the book -- I don't get to enjoy my coffee until after I eat, which will be hard but I'll have to find a way to eat that early. I can't really see me choking down a boiled egg at that hour, so I'll have to decide what kind of prep-ahead stuff I'm likely to want to eat so early in the day.


I feel strange this evening. I'm worn out physically, but I feel like my brain wants to get things done... so I've been trying to keep a mental list of things that apparently I "need to do", with the intention of doing them as I'm able... I have no idea how that's going to fly, but I guess we'll find out as I go. I'll probably end up putting the biggest things, the ones that seem most important, on the task list in my planner... but for next week, because this week's booked quite enough as it is, thanks much.

Today was better in terms of cramping, but that's typical for mid-cycle. If things continue as they used to, I can expect tomorrow to be heavy and painful again. I'm hoping to get a little more sleep this evening, and to make myself get up with the first alarm tomorrow (I hate that I get out of that habit so easily when the kids are out).

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21 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 22

Meal 1 -- 6:00
boiled egg, small baked potato with coconut oil

Meal 2 -- 10:15
leftover spaghetti squash & sauce, green beans
small banana

Meal 3 -- 17:00
Genghis Grill bowl with sauce that had soy and wheat


Day 1 of breakfast before coffee. I realize that one egg does not a perfect portion make, but 6:00 is far too early for me to even attempt to shove in one of my usual 3-egg meals. Even if I could get it in, I wouldn't want to deal with the amount of nausea that would undoubtedly follow. I guess we can call Meal 1 a mini-meal, today. I spent some time yesterday looking over recipes for egg cups, found a couple that look quite nice and don't use egg whites alongside the whole eggs... so that makes me happy. One of them looks really good, I'm eager to try it, but I'll need to pick up some sausage first so I guess that'll have to wait until tomorrow or Saturday.

I've dragged a little this morning, so far. I did get up at 5:30, but only long enough to start my ice maker... up at 5:45 to start coffee, go get breakfast, and then come back to eat (yes at my desk but I didn't focus on anything other than eating, and not super-quickly, I just needed to make sure I'd be upstairs if my youngest woke before time for me to get her up). I can't tell if eating so early affected my energy level, and that's probably not a thing that'll stand out until I've done it a few days in a row, anyway. I do know that after eating even a small meal, my coffee intake before leaving the house was around 1/3 of what I'd usually have by that time... I'm drinking more now (from the same pot I made when I got up), but even this plus what I drank earlier is less than what I usually drink each day. I think I might actually make a little less tomorrow and see how that goes.


Well, so far things aren't thrown off too terribly. It used to be that when I'd eat an early breakfast, I'd be starved way before lunch time... it's not exactly normal "lunch time" for me, but I did make it 4 hours, even off that small wannabe meal that only had a halfway decent fat source. I could see lasting a little longer if I'm eating more and have a better fat source, since I usually eat at 8:30 and again at 13:00-13:30... I won't complain, either way.


I'm snacky... grazey... or would be, if I allowed myself to go to the kitchen just now. I'm not hungry, I know I'm not. I definitely wouldn't eat fish right now (though that's not a good test because I'm never actually in the mood for fish, it's just not one of my foods).


I never did snack earlier, so yay for that. We met up with my friend and went out for dinner, and I decided that I would go ahead and test gluten... the sauce I used also had soy, which I'd already tested previously, so I hope there's not too big of a reaction. So far, I'm feeling okay but maybe a little gassy (I haven't pinned down whether it's gas or cramps), but the "dose" of both ingredients was pretty small overall. I'll undoubtedly test gluten again separately on another day, using some kind of bread, just to see the effects by themselves (and to see if bread affects me differently than a gluten-filled sauce).

We're watching an episode (or two) of our show and then we'll take my friend (and her daughter) home. Bed will come soon after that.

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22 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 23

Meal 1 -- 5:45
2 scrambled eggs, small baked potato

Meal 2 -- 11:00
2 fried eggs, corned beef, home fries with peppers and onions

Meal 3 -- 18:30
two burger patties, two slices of bacon, 4 pickle slices, fried potatoes, cole slaw


This morning, I was up at 5:30 to start both machines - ice and coffee. I did lay back down, but got up just a few minutes later (before the 5:45 alarm) to go downstairs and make breakfast. I didn't have any boiled eggs, since that wasn't on my list of priorities last night, and I hadn't bothered to try making egg muffins yet, either... so I did scrambled ones (and realized that my little skillet definitely neds to be re-seasoned soon). This time, my 14yo was downstairs having some cereal, so I sat at the table with her and we both ate quietly (the rest of the house sleeps a little later than we do).

Eating earlier in the morning didn't seem to throw me off (yesterday) as much as I thought it might. It did make it interesting getting to meal 3 from meal 2, though. I'm really going to have to consider inserting an exercise time somewhere (either mid-morning before I'd naturally grab meal 2 or mid-afternoon so I can make it to meal 3), or I'm going to be going way too long between two meals (or finding myself in the kitchen looking for a snack). I'm not exactly able to do the type of high-intensity workout that others do, but I do want to start doing more than just the normal daily stairs and walking I do (10-12 flights of stairs daily, minimum, and I have no idea how much I do step-wise, but it's not enough).

Note to self:
We need to eat a little more during the day, because although we managed to skip the snacking yesterday, the day overall was short on all 3 macros (Meal 1 was just barely there, after all). Surviving is not enough. We need to eat enough throughout the day to stay alert, energized, and balanced. Speaking of staying balanced, keep in mind that physical activity is supposed to be great for that kind of thing... which is yet another reason to add in a time for daily exercise sooner, not later. To continue losing weight and feeling healthier, this is another step that we just need to start taking. It's not required, as evidenced by January, but it will lead to even better results (and that includes the NSVs that are even more important than the weight we might lose). Here's the kicker - we need to think of these two things as independent from each other... eat more (than yesterday) and exercise more; it is NOT a matter of "justifying" more food by adding exercise. I am an adult. I don't need to justify eating more, but I do need to take active control over my health, which includes how much I eat and how much I move.
/end 3rd-person pep talk


The minimal soy and wheat from last night's sauce adventure definitely produced some gas, but no bloating this time (which could be due to minor level of ingestion as much as anything else). I did wake up with hemorrhoids, which had first popped up again when I tested peanut butter (and they persisted well past my last soy test)... so although it's a very minor issue (at this point, especially compared to my last experience with them), I definitely think both peanuts and soy are causing inflammation that either manifests as or leads to hemorrhoids. Fun stuff. This didn't seem to happen at all with peas, however, and of course I still need to test gluten separately (that will be sometime after I try my non-gluten grains, though).


One of the ladies from my original Jan group is looking at doing another round starting March 1, to reset after a super-awesome meal coming up at the end of this month... I think I might go in with her on that one, in part to be continued support and in part to get a full reset in before I tackle my remaining reintroductions (basically grains). My plan would be to introduce ghee in a few days, which would give me time to assess effects before using it during that next month.


It's been a really long afternoon and evening, and it's much later now than I had any intention of being awake... but I made an exception for the sake of my friend, since I know tomorrow's morning schedule can allow me to sleep in until my body is ready to wake up. I don't intend to make a habit of this kind of night, though, because I'm all too aware of how much havoc it will end up causing if it's not just a once in a great while type of thing.

22 Feb 2019 -- reintro day 23

Meal 1 -- 5:45
2 scrambled eggs, small baked potato

Meal 2 -- 11:00
2 fried eggs, corned beef, home fries with peppers and onions

Meal 3 -- 18:30
two burger patties, two slices of bacon, 4 pickle slices, fried potatoes, cole slaw


This morning, I was up at 5:30 to start both machines - ice and coffee. I did lay back down, but got up just a few minutes later (before the 5:45 alarm) to go downstairs and make breakfast. I didn't have any boiled eggs, since that wasn't on my list of priorities last night, and I hadn't bothered to try making egg muffins yet, either... so I did scrambled ones (and realized that my little skillet definitely neds to be re-seasoned soon). This time, my 14yo was downstairs having some cereal, so I sat at the table with her and we both ate quietly (the rest of the house sleeps a little later than we do).

Eating earlier in the morning didn't seem to throw me off (yesterday) as much as I thought it might. It did make it interesting getting to meal 3 from meal 2, though. I'm really going to have to consider inserting an exercise time somewhere (either mid-morning before I'd naturally grab meal 2 or mid-afternoon so I can make it to meal 3), or I'm going to be going way too long between two meals (or finding myself in the kitchen looking for a snack). I'm not exactly able to do the type of high-intensity workout that others do, but I do want to start doing more than just the normal daily stairs and walking I do (10-12 flights of stairs daily, minimum, and I have no idea how much I do step-wise, but it's not enough).

Note to self:
We need to eat a little more during the day, because although we managed to skip the snacking yesterday, the day overall was short on all 3 macros (Meal 1 was just barely there, after all). Surviving is not enough. We need to eat enough throughout the day to stay alert, energized, and balanced. Speaking of staying balanced, keep in mind that physical activity is supposed to be great for that kind of thing... which is yet another reason to add in a time for daily exercise sooner, not later. To continue losing weight and feeling healthier, this is another step that we just need to start taking. It's not required, as evidenced by January, but it will lead to even better results (and that includes the NSVs that are even more important than the weight we might lose). Here's the kicker - we need to think of these two things as independent from each other... eat more (than yesterday) and exercise more; it is NOT a matter of "justifying" more food by adding exercise. I am an adult. I don't need to justify eating more, but I do need to take active control over my health, which includes how much I eat and how much I move.
/end 3rd-person pep talk


The minimal soy and wheat from last night's sauce adventure definitely produced some gas, but no bloating this time (which could be due to minor level of ingestion as much as anything else). I did wake up with hemorrhoids, which had first popped up again when I tested peanut butter (and they persisted well past my last soy test)... so although it's a very minor issue (at this point, especially compared to my last experience with them), I definitely think both peanuts and soy are causing inflammation that either manifests as or leads to hemorrhoids. Fun stuff. This didn't seem to happen at all with peas, however, and of course I still need to test gluten separately (that will be sometime after I try my non-gluten grains, though).


One of the ladies from my original Jan group is looking at doing another round starting March 1, to reset after a super-awesome meal coming up at the end of this month... I think I might go in with her on that one, in part to be continued support and in part to get a full reset in before I tackle my remaining reintroductions (basically grains). My plan would be to introduce ghee in a few days, which would give me time to assess effects before using it during that next month.


It's been a really long afternoon and evening, and it's much later now than I had any intention of being awake... but I made an exception for the sake of my friend, since I know tomorrow's morning schedule can allow me to sleep in until my body is ready to wake up. I don't intend to make a habit of this kind of night, though, because I'm all too aware of how much havoc it will end up causing if it's not just a once in a great while type of thing.

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