Dealing with loss during whole30


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Hello, I just lost my grandma day ago and now I´m kinda torn between quiting whole30 (I´m already on a day 14) and wanting to stay even harder. Because now I finally fully noticed that toxic pattern of comforting myself with food, when dealing with stressor sadness, but on the other hand, food doesn´t really seem significant right now. Also, all those NSV that come with sugar-free mind just flew out of the window, because I feel kinda numb and I´m not able to pay attention to that right now. And last, but not least, I really don´t feel like bothering my aunt with my food requirments during the funeral wake. I know it might sound insensitive or selfish, but I´d really appreciate some extra opinions on that. We were not super close with my grandmother and I can say that she lived very long and fulsome life, but it still hits you hard.

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  • Whole30 Certified Coach

I'm so sorry for your loss. Sometimes the routine of Whole30 helps eliminate the guilt of binge/comfort eating because you know you are fueling yourself in a healthy manner, and gives us something to focus on while we're grieving. Can you eat before the wake or bring your own dish to eat? Maybe offer to help her with the food so you can get some Whole30 meals in there?

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Aw, Im so sorry for your loss!  Those things are always tough!  I don't think any of your thoughts around this are selfish or insensitive.  Going through a difficult time doesn't mean that you have to stop caring for yourself.  In this instance, I would say that perhaps you keep going with the program 'as best you can' and then start again when you're feeling better.  That means that at the wake, if there are veggies and maybe some protein that you could eat, choose that instead of the cake/pie/pasta, but give yourself the room to just do the best you can.  It's not unusual in grief to not have an appetite so it might just be that you can manage with some purse snacks and depending on where you're staying, a hardboiled egg or two... I think that just making good educated decisions in the SPIRIT of Whole30 without beating yourself up about the rules is probably going to serve you better at this time... and we're always here for you when you're ready to come back and to cheer you through this tough time too!

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Thank you so much for your help and support. I´ll do my best in making informed choices, but at the top of things my kid got sick and has fevers, so I´m not even sure we´ll be able to attend. I will do my best to keep up with whole30 and keep myself sane, and if it just doesn´t go well, I´ll leave it to February or March whole30. 

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