Jessica's 1st Whole30; begun 1/2/13

[Jessica M.]

Today is day 7 of my first Whole30! It's not as hard as I thought it would be… let's hope I still think that next week. I think the biggest challenge for me is wanting my "supernormally stimulating" (love that term) coffee with 5 splendas and hazelnut creamer times 2-3 mugs plus more supernormally stimulating Coke Zeroes in the afternoon. The book has shamed me, so I won't say drinking black coffee is HARD, but it is terrible. After a few days of massive caffeine-withdrawal headaches, I broke down and have been choking down a mug each morning. The fresh ground stuff I make at work is LESS nasty than the stuff I brew at home. Tea is icky. Flavored seltzers are icky. My tongue is expecting sweet. I'd rather drink regular water and that has to be ok. No more Crystal Light with dinner. So, I am being good. Maybe a bit too much olive oil or a few too many almonds, but I have been reading any ingredient lists and eating mostly freshly prepared foods (though I don't have funds or good sources for the good grass-fed stuff yet). I am just dipping my toes into this way of eating. Hopefully it will stick and I can pull the hubby and kids into it. :-)

Hubby's not trying Whole30 with me, and sort of thinks it's nuts, but he's being supportive since we both have a LOT of weight to lose and want and need to get healthier before it catches up with us in worse ways than it already has. We dragged our 10 year old son and 8 year old daughter out of bed a bit earlier on their first day back to school from Christmas break, today, for a family walk. Nothing strenuous. We'd figured out the LAST time we were trying to get healthy that four times around our road was a mile, we only made them walk it twice, so half a mile. But better than nothing.

I'm just 5'1 and weigh 209. I've been on the chubby side since about 5th grade, and after college it got worse and since having my kids it's gotten a LOT worse. In 1996 when we got married I was about 140 and when I got pregnant with my first I was 185. I was gestational diabetic that first pregnancy so was paying attention to what I ate so though I was up to 215 when he was born, I was 175 just a few days after and all the nursing and pumping got me down to 157 by the time I got pregnant with my second. By the time she was 1 I was back to about 175 but haven't gotten lower than that in the past 7 years despite several attempts at Weight Watchers followed by a couple of tries at South Beach. SBD makes me feel good, so I know less grains is definitely a good direction. The past ten years a multitude of woes has been growing steadily. Nothing life threatening thank God, but anxiety, depression, allergies, sinus problems, constipation, sore muscles, achy joints, many headaches, constant exhaustion, etc…. I have blamed motherhood and said I am "allergic to Florida" (I'm from NYC), which both probably contribute, but I wonder if it's more than that. CERTAINLY my diet can improve. CERTAINLY carrying 90 extra pounds for my frame is hurting my joints and making me feel breathless. Improving what I put in can only help.

I'm trying to not let my number one priority be weight loss. I guess is still is. But I am taking the approach this time that I need to fix some of my food issues first before I can drop the pounds. I can overeat healthy food just as easily as cookies. It's mental, it's emotional, it's hormonal. The more I read, the more I am certain of that. So, I need to fix my "gut" and feel better so I can move more and be happier. I am hoping all that will eventually result in being a healthy weight. Probably not this year but hopefully I will stick with it long enough to see real results. Usually I am all pumped up for 6 or 8 weeks, planning menus and chopping veggies and trying recipes… I am really really needing to make THIS switch different and long term.

So, hello all, and wish me luck. Good luck and good eating to you all. ;-)

-Jessica

[Jessica M.]

Day 7 log so far:

2 spinach-egg "muffins"

Handful of strawberries

Handful of raw almonds

Black coffee when I got to work

Turkey and butternut squash stew thing I made

Wholly guacamole single serve packet

A ton of baby carrots. Should have taken a handful instead of leaving the bag open.

Dinner...? Chicken and salad or leftover spaghetti squash, or Some leftover beef stew from Sunday.

[CSB1960]

Good luck! I liked my coffee with plenty of "stuff" added to. I can now drink it black. I may try some coconut milk, maybe not. I'm on day 9 and it does get easier!

[Jessica M.]

Thanks, CSB!

[Jessica M.]

First bad slip. Not terrible food-wise, but caloric ally... And not supposed to be snacking. Had TEO handfulls of raw almonds. I like Almonds too much. Should probably not buy them for a while. Was probably not actually hungry. Just used to snacking and my office has been smelling of onion rings all afternoon. Oh well, I didn't hit the candy bowl.

[Jessica M.]

Day 8. Today should be interesting. We all woke an hour too late to take our walk, I forgot my lunch at home, ate breakfast in the car (again), really want some GOOD coffee. I take medication for anxiety and depression and forgot the pill I take in the morning and my allergy pill, too. So, I should be nice and cranky and headachy any time now.

Breakfast: red grapes and two spinach-egg muffins. Less satisfying the more days in a row I have them. Will have to freeze the next batch and just pull out for a couple times a week, not several days in a row.

Want to crawl back in bed and/or go sit on the potty, but I am at work. Feeling blah. The past few days have been fine, what the heck?

Well, going to make a cup of black coffee. Sigh.

Day 8. Day 8. Day 8. Day 8. I am doing fine. I am doing fine. I am doing fine. I am doing fine.

[Allisen]

Hi Jessica. I'm on the same boat as you Day 8, tired cranky lol these spinach egg muffins not feeling it today but ate it & want to be in bed, boo to work lol

We can do this!

[Jessica M.]

Thanks, Allisen! Good luck!

[Jessica M.]

Anxious, bad sleep last night. Left the bed and slept on the couch snuggled with one of my dogs.

Woke too late for family walk again, kids must think we were joking.

Last 2 spinach-egg "muffins",

Handful almonds

Apple

Black coffee.

Dentist... Yay. Crick in my neck now.

Forgot my lunch again. Bought chick fil a grilled chicken salad. No cheese or dressing. Used some guacamole I had at work. Seltzer.

Starving mid afternoon. Had more almonds. Not buying any next week.

Dinner: chicken breast cutlets dipped in egg and unsweetened coconut, cooked in some olive oil. Broccoli. Baked sweet potato with a fork of coconut manna. Never had the coconut butter before, it was tasty. Oh, had to eat carrots while I cooked, it was 7:00 already and I was famished. Ugh. Full now, had plenty.

Day 9 done. Waiting for some magic. Need to eat less nuts.

[Allisen]

Anxious, bad sleep last night. Left the bed and slept on the couch snuggled with one of my dogs.

Woke too late for family walk again, kids must think we were joking.

Last 2 spinach-egg "muffins",

Handful almonds

Apple

Black coffee.

Dentist... Yay. Crick in my neck now.

Forgot my lunch again. Bought chick fil a grilled chicken salad. No cheese or dressing. Used some guacamole I had at work. Seltzer.

Starving mid afternoon. Had more almonds. Not buying any next week.

Dinner: chicken breast cutlets dipped in egg and unsweetened coconut, cooked in some olive oil. Broccoli. Baked sweet potato with a fork of coconut manna. Never had the coconut butter before, it was tasty. Oh, had to eat carrots while I cooked, it was 7:00 already and I was famished. Ugh. Full now, had plenty.

Day 9 done. Waiting for some magic. Need to eat less nuts.

We survived Day 8! Yay! Sorry to hear day 9 sleeping wasn't well & you didn't great for not preparing for lunch. Hang in there & hope you kick that nuts routine

As for me, feeling way better than yesterday slighty bloated but assuming its the whole process of new eatings adjustments. Happy to say, I got to eat normal scramble eggs this morning lol

Well good luck tomorrow. Have a great Thursday!

[jesmadi]

I am a newb and only on day 4 and I already enjoy reading your posts. I was in a Kill All Things mood today so I am hoping it gets easier. thanks so much for sharing. I am hoping for some happy successful posts from you so i know it can get easier.... Good luck I am rooting for you!!!

[Jessica M.]

Congrats, Allisen and Jesmadi. We can do this! Ok, last night was tv night for me and my DH and the entire time I was chewing my lips and going,"You're not hungry, you just want to munch. You're not hungry, you just want to munch." The other side of my brain was going,"go onnnnn, have some walnuts. They're HEALTHY. What's the harm!" Still another place in my brain is telling me,"There are chocolate chips and ripe bananas. That would be gooooood." HEY! I AM TRYING TO FOLLOW A PLOT HERE! I GAVE YOU FOOD! SHUT THE HECK UP! Hahaha.

Breakfast today... 3 hard boiled eggs and a handful of grapes. The hardboiled eggs were like heaven after too many days of spinach-egg muffins. If I could just get up earlier to cook something fresh. Hubby and DD and I would all be happier. DS would still eat a peanut butter waffle, but, hey. Having black coffee. Mmmmmmm. (Not really. But it'll stave off that headache and I have work to do.)

Lunch... finally remembered to bring my stew again. It's not my favorite, but it'll be filling. Also have some celery and guacamole to have with it.

Here's do a good day. Day 10... 1/3 of the way through. Everything will be fine. :-) Still waiting for the magic to kick in. :-)

[Kaleena]

I'm on day 10 too. Oh, how I miss my coffee with cream and evening tea with milk. I'd even give up the sugar in it forever just to not have another coffee with coconut milk or chai tea again! Strangely enough, this is really the only thing I miss!

I'm also having a lot of trouble staying out of the darn cupboards at night.

[Jessica M.]

I haven't tried the coconut milk in the coffee yet. I'm willing to bet I will hate it. I'm a baby with drinks. Definitely only like everything bold and sweet. Good luck on your day 10!

[Jessica M.]

On top of my usual crazy dreams, had TEO dreams that I ate cheese by mistake or habit and freaked out in myself, plus a dream about making my own sausage. 2 weeks ago I was buying Wendy's for lunch. Hahahahahaha.

[Jessica M.]

Friday night: I coach my son's Odyssey of the Mind team (a creative/performance type world wide competition) 5-7:30. They were all off task and I was being a doormat, so I was depressed when we got home and not even that hungry but wanted to dive into tacos or popcorn or cake. Had leftover chicken breast 'breaded' with coconut flakes and broccoli with coconut butter, and an orange. Moped around till I was falling asleep watching old Buffy episodes. Head and neck hurting

Today, less grumpy. Has to clean up my trashed kitchen from yesterday before making breakfast. Had sautéed broccoli slaw and mushrooms and scallions (in olive oil) scrambled with some egg. Tried my coffee with some coconut milk. Not tasty enough unsweetened to bother with the extra fat. Second small cup just black. Still icky but keeps my headaches at bay.

Sitting waiting for dd To get out if her dance class. :-) will have to have salad for linch before a bunch of stuff goes bad.

Need to make shopping/cooking lists. Funds are very tight this week until payday, so will be mostly working off frozen chicken. Might have some fish in there. Might only have fish prepped with other ingredients. :-P

Want to try some home made mayo... Will use with some egg yolks for deviled eggs. Maybe add some wasabi or something. DD would like that too. Need to find breakfast ideas. Saw one egg thing with a sweet potato nest/base; wonder if I pinned it.

Going to the "national Girl Scout sleepover" tonight after soccer for DS and dinner. Girls are not sleeping over but are decorating cookies and having popcorn and stuff. Dreamed about Girl Scout cookies. Fun.

Dinner. Something with ground bee fun the fridge. Who knows. Need to buy an avocado.

[Jessica M.]

Back from the Girl Scout thing. Cookies and loads of toppings, popcorn, etc. I had my water I was ok.

Driving home I was suddenly starving like I hadn't had dinner so I am having seconds of meatloaf and green beans. Put coconut flakes in the meatloaf instead of breadcrumbs. It was odd but not bad. Son and hubby didn't eat it. DS had leftover chicken and DH ate when I was at the party with DD. neither was in a beef mood.

They had Dairy Queen. I'm surrounded by sugar. Day 11 nearing an end.

Was chatting with one of the Brownie moms, she recently lost 35 lbs. she started with some crazy cleanse from her chiro that was only 500 cal a day. I'd pass out or kill someone. That only had her lose 7lb in 45 days. NOT WORTH IT! She is eating less and only certain things had Colon and bladder issues. Almost told her Whole30 would be good for her. But I don't know her well, so.... I also can't tell if she's nice or not. Sometimes I get a weird vibe. I dunno.

Time to make my kiddos go to bed! Day 12 tomorrow. Need to shop and chop!

[Jessica M.]

Day 12.

Breakfast: was hungry when I was feeding the kids so had a ripe banana with a handful of almonds. Good together, not as good as could be for Whole30 choices though. Then 2 scrambled eggs with mushrooms and black coffee. Today's failed beverage experiment: Put some unsweetened cocoa powder and cinnamon in with my coffee basket when brewing. Didn't make a difference. Could be seen as paleofying if it made it taste good anyway. Oh well.

Lunch... I'm not even hungry but we need to be out shopping soon and I was feeding everyone else, so I had an apple, a few strawberries and a hard boiled egg. Heavy on the fruit today, but I haven't been shopping yet and can't look at a salad.

WE shall see. Doing ok still I think

[Jessica M.]

Day 14. Still doing ok. Feeling grumpy still, but I am about to get my ToM and despite being on birth control pills for most of the past 22 years (minus the 4 or 5 years in the middle I was making babies and nursing them), I still get very moody, crampy, etc. My anxiety and depression meds kill the crying, but I am more miserable than the rest of the month for sure.

So... I want to have ice cream and potato chips.

But I'm not.

Still eating too many nuts and eating on the go... that's the worst of my noncompliance.

Breakfast: 1/2 of a hardboiled egg (DD swiped the other half) and 2 salmon-sweet potato-coconut flake patties. Had almonds and black coffee when I got to work. I just want to chew. It's habit. Usually it would be some kind of cereal or some gum. Need to get to be stronger than my damn habits. The cup of Splenda packets by the coffee maker looked inviting. That's so wrong. It's chemicals. I don't need that in me. STOP IT! Geez!

Lunch: Veggie soup I made with some chicken in it (not much chicken, mostly cabbage, zucchini, little bit of sweet potato). It's not exciting but it's filling. 2 more hardboiled eggs. A small apple.

I'm not hungry but I want to chew. I want something. Something. Something. That's just because that's how I deal with discomfort, have something to eat to soothe myself for 5 minutes... so wrong. Exactly why I am obese. OBESE!

Dinner. I have chicken breast I cooked. Will have some spaghetti squash or acorn squash and some broccoli with that. I am not wild about the spice combination or the way it came out, but hubby and kids absolutely rejected it, so it's all mine. May shred it and mix it with the spaghetti squash (just has some clarified butter on it right now, needs some work).

Expected to feel perkier or at least less bloated by day 14. Have been fantasizing about what to add to my coffee when I'm "done" but part of me wants to make it Whole45 or Whole100 and see if my body changes. I am not seeing the magic yet, but maybe my body is just too damaged. I never thought I ate THAT badly, but then again, my day sounded a lot like the not-so-hot example in ISWF, with a lot more coffee and Coke Zero thrown in. And iced tea. And crackers or popcorn. I loooovvvveeee popcorn. Sigh.

Damn, I'm moody. Want to get Chinese food and curl up on the couch with the heating pad and my snuggly dog (I have 2 but only 1 likes to be held). Sighhhhhhhhh.

[Jessica M.]

Ate way too much dinner. Mostly veggies, but I am stuffed. I couldn't regulate myself. I am crampy and depressed.

[Jessica M.]

Day 19. Last night was tough. I am mourning my bad habits. Change is hard. NO, I know, not fighting cancer hard. (God Forbid!) But it's difficult for ME. I wanted to make a big bowl of buttery popcorn and grab a Coke Zero and sit down to watch a movie. I wanted to bake brownies. I wanted a spoon of peanut butter. I was CRANK-yyyyyy! I finished the most hormonal part of my month so I was not expecting to get MORE cranky. Byproduct of a busy Saturday? Workshop in the morning, shopping, DS's soccer game, etc. DD wanted my attention b/c I didn't take her to dance class as usual and it's been a hectic week so she is missing Mommy Time.

Friday I was giddy over my first veggie co-op order. Saturday I wanted to get McDonalds. Avoided bad food choices, but was sour about it.

Did not buy any almonds at the store. No nuts at all. They are just a way to overeat, they are way too easy to eat when I am not really hungry.

Sigh. Not feeling the magic. I guess I am way more messed up than I guessed.

[Jessica M.]

Day 22. Kinda impressed with myself that I have been grain, dairy, sugar, Splenda, Peanut Butter, Coke Zero, etc., etc., free for three entire weeks. I was uncertain I could do it at first but here I am, thinking I need to do this MORE than 30 days. Last week was all about fantasizing what I would use to sweeten my coffee on day 31. I ran out of my meds AND had my period, so I was a big mess. This week so far, I went from being way too full feeling on Sunday and Monday to being "OK" yesterday and today. Felt mildly hungry come my 1pm lunch, not ravished and headachey. Little by little this is helping. It has to.

Breakfast-- wedge of an egg and sweet potato bake I made on Sunday and some baby carrots. Coffee with coconut milk. This new brand, from Walmart of all places, is ten times as thick as the Thai Kitchen kind and only ingredients are coconut and water. Not even guar gum. It was ok. Maybe not SO much better than black coffee (eww) to warrant all that fat. My daughter was curious. Right out of the fridge it had the consistency of "cool whip", so I can see why. She tasted it. She will eat anything, unlike my son. :-)

Lunch-- Dropped my tupperware in the parking lot this morning, so the cat colony we have behind my job got most of that. By the time I went to clean it up, there was just some snow peas and mushrooms on the ground. Apparently they like bok choy. It DID have fish sauce on it. Hee hee. Luckily I also brought 4 hardboiled eggs, and had more carrots and snack pack of Wholly Guacamole. On like glass nine of water. ;-)

Dinner... I am so not wanting to have any more of the pulled pork I made Sunday/Monday, so I will have to quick defrost some fish or chicken. Or, I have some chicken sausage in the fridge with no bad ingredients. Could have that. Baked some kale last night but I burned it. Could do some sweet potato and salad. Running out of my veggies. There's corn... don't know if I want to have it or not. Read an anti-corn rant that scared me. ;-) Then again, it's fresh and I made clarified butter I could put on it. Hubby and Daughter will like that. DS will want green beans and boca burger, if anything. My picky eater is SICK, so I have not even been trying to change his diet at all yet. Last night he had cream of wheat for "dinner" after not eating much all day or the 2 days before. ONE DAY (soon), I will get acclimated to this way of eating and pull everyone along with me.

I have the best mother in law ever and she told me she is very proud I am learning so much more about nutrition and making changes for all of us. Made me feel good. She did warn me not to use her old tactic of feeding the kids liver and lying that is was steak, or trying to pass tofu off as mozzarella. My poor hubby, no wonder he's resistant to "health food". LOL.

[Jessica M.]

Uhhhh, corn is a grain. Corn is a grain. Corn is a grain.

Had some salmon sweet potato hash with peppers and onions. Half a banana and a bit of orange and pineapple while cutting/cooking, also.

[robotarmy]

Jessica, I've just been reading up on your journal--love it! Salmon and sweet potato hash, eh? Totally trying that.

[Jessica M.]

Hi, Robotarmy! Thanks. I called it hash because my patties didn't stick with one egg as binder. Packaged salmon (which I am convinced is really tuna with a higher price). Last week I made some with coconut flakes also, it looked better but I was not super happy with the taste. Was eating salmon and sweet potato thing agin this morning and my hubby was like,"salmon? For breakfast? Really?" I said,"I love eggs but I can't eat them EVERY day!" Mr. Cereal there will be slow to come on THIS particular journey.