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MadyVanilla

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4 hours ago, MadyVanilla said:

I'm also wondering if this is a nightshade impact-I've always feared that I may be sensitive to them, and I had ALOT of tomatoes and white potatoes, along with my usual pepper and other spices, over the 24 hours previous.  I don't want to learn that I can't eat tomatoes, peppers, or many spices.  For the time being, I'm just going to be aware - maybe I just overloaded on them.  

I had a similar thought, after eating way too many potatoes, some sweet peppers, and black pepper with almost every meal.  I cut back and feel better.  I'm still not sure if it's a nightshade sensitivity, but cutting back has made a difference so I'm sticking with that for now, and will do an experiment some time in the future.  I even cut back on pasta sauce, and add more veg like celery, onions & carrots to my spaghetti squash on pasta night.  I hope for you that it's just a volume thing too, nightshades are just so versatile.

4 hours ago, MadyVanilla said:

The gyms here have been open for a little over a week now.

I'm a bit jelly that your gym is open.  I miss the gym, but I don't even think that I feel safe enough yet to go back, even if it was open.  Too bad, much of my muscle is gone -_-.  I keep telling myself I will re-start at home, after I lose a bit more weight.  Just procrastination.  Congrats to you on the couch to 5k, and on re-starting the push ups.  

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19 hours ago, ShadowInTheKitchen said:

I even cut back on pasta sauce, and add more veg like celery, onions & carrots to my spaghetti squash on pasta night. 

This is a great idea - make the sauce chunkier so there's less tomato.  I'm going to do this.  

 

19 hours ago, ShadowInTheKitchen said:

I'm a bit jelly that your gym is open.  I miss the gym, but I don't even think that I feel safe enough yet to go back, even if it was open.  Too bad, much of my muscle is gone -_-.  I keep telling myself I will re-start at home, after I lose a bit more weight.  Just procrastination.  Congrats to you on the couch to 5k, and on re-starting the push ups.  

Thanks!  These are the third or fourth different routine I've attempted during the pandemic, but I am doing a little better sticking with them while on W30.  I need the structure and routine of going to the gym, but like you, I'm concerned that it may not be quite safe yet.  There have been lots of Facebook posts about how clean my gym is and how safe people (none of whom I know) feel going, but I suspect these are much like the fake Amazon ratings.  It's nice to think about returning on July 1, but that's tomorrow!!!  I may wait another week...

 

I got the house clean yesterday and followed my healthy habits checklist.  It's nice to feel productive.  My longer afternoon walk was cut short by significant pain in my knee and hip-ugh!!  The yoga did wonders afterward, but I still needed to take pain meds in order to sleep.  This is two days in a row (after two days of heavy nightshade consumption) where I've had significant, level 6 or 7 pain.  It's the exact opposite of where I was a week ago.  The only nightshade I had yesterday was a little curry in my chicken salad.  And I learned that peppercorns are not nightshades, which is great because I eat a lot of black pepper.  I am feeling less stiff today - could be the reduction in nightshades yesterday, could be the yoga last night.  We'll see how the day plays out.     

Day 25/60

Mood-8, energy-6.  I'm still dragging a little in the mornings.  I miss waking up early and getting outside before it gets hot.  I suspect this is related to the pain and poor sleep of the last weeks, but I did sleep 7 hours last night.  Though I was awake from 3:30-5:00 a.m.  Pain-0 now and during the morning short walk.  I probably still have pain meds in my system.  

M1-curry chicken salad with celery and garden greens.  I'll still eat this until it's gone, but will continue to monitor my pain levels.  I do suspect that's it's an issue of eating too much.  Once this salad is gone, I'll do a few days of no nightshades and see how I feel in comparison.  Unless I continue to have significant pain today, then I'll just throw it out.  I can deal with low level achiness, but not what I've had the last few days.  And I really don't want to trade eating the curry spice for meds.  

M2-leftover hamburger with onions and mushrooms fried in ghee from last night's dinner (a change from the original plan).  Along with sliced cucumber.   

M3-the chicken and zucchini that I was planning to make yesterday.  

My goals for today are to peruse the WellFed cookbooks that I haven't looked at in a while.  I also need to get my yoga in earlier because my son is playing baseball this evening.  

An NSV-I tried on a pair of capri pants that I haven't worn in ages.  I could button and zip them, though they are still a little tight, but  once they fit, I will be down at least two sizes!  So I guess I'm down one now :).  At least from when I was last working outside the home and wearing actual clothes.  It could be two sizes, given the Covid-19 weight gain I had.  

 

 

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Sounds like some lovely NSVs. Also, I wish you joy in browsing those Well Fed cookbooks... I think Melissa Joulwan is my favorite paleo recipe author ever. Her recipes are so creative and satisfying!

Hoping your morning is pain free.

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Note to self - use the garlic aioli mayonnaise as a base for anything I  "bread".  It was delicious!  I think I'll do this later in the week with fish.  

I'm feeling MUCH better today.  I slept better, woke up (but didn't get up) earlier, and I had no pain yesterday or so far today.  I'll give this a few days, then add some nightshades back into my diet and see what happens.  I missed my opportunity for a long walk this morning because I didn't get up early enough, but it's a rainy and stormy day so it's fine.  And I'm not quite mentally ready to go to the gym yet, maybe next week.  

Day 26/30

Energy-8, Mood-9, Pain-0.  I think I could have done a C25K this morning, I felt so good!  But I wasn't thinking along those lines, so wasn't prepared.  I'm really trying to take this slow, I know what happens when I ignore the pain.  

M1-chicken salad with celery and lettuce

M2-Leftover hamburger with sliced cucumber, lettuce, pickles, mustard, a handful of almonds to add some fat.  Or maybe some Caesar dressing, turn this into a salad.  

M3-Leftover baked chicken and zucchini.  I think I'll fry the zucchini in a little ghee - I was hungry a few hours afterward last night, as there wasn't enough fat in this meal.  Usually, I'm really good about eating fat, it definitely satiates me and keeps cravings at bay.  But when I think I can get away with just a little bit in a meal, I'm wrong.  I ended up snacking on almonds and dates last night.  

My vegetable choices are pretty boring and often the same things.  I'll add spinach, broccoli, or kale once in a while, but I need to expand for more variety regularly.  I was doing better when I was getting a box of veggies delivered.  This will quickly lead to food boredom for me - I need to be sure to plan whole meals and not just the proteins for next week.  I tend to throw on vegetables as an afterward, but being more mindful is a good idea.  

I'm toying with the idea of weighing myself on Day 31...I'm not a slave to the scale, and I feel like I've lost quite a bit of weight.  But then what if it's not as much as I expected?  I'm not sure how that would effect me.  If it's not at least 15 pounds, I think I'll be disappointed.  Maybe I should wait.  Still a few days to decide.  On Day 25 in the journal book, it talked about reasons that you may want to extend the W30.  I'm extending due to a noncompliance with rice issue last week, but I do fit in two of the three categories for reasons to extend - I have chronic pain that isn't fully resolved and I consider myself a carb/sugar addict.  In the spirit of the program, I really should wait to weigh-in until I finish my 60 days, and be content with people noticing and clothes fitting better.  I'll ponder this.  

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14 minutes ago, Contessa said:

Sounds like some lovely NSVs. Also, I wish you joy in browsing those Well Fed cookbooks... I think Melissa Joulwan is my favorite paleo recipe author ever. Her recipes are so creative and satisfying!

Hoping your morning is pain free.

Thank you!  I just love her books, too!  I use so many of her tricks to whip together a quick meal, and for inspiration even if I don't follow a specific recipe.  I need to set a short-term goal and then reward myself with Well Fed Weeknights.  

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A new month, a good time to set a goal.  For the most part, diet is running smoothly and my energy levels are high.  I know I'm working at home until at least August 1, so this is a good time to institute new habits related to exercise.  

Goal 1:  Daily yoga, even if it's just 10 minutes, for the next 2 weeks.  I'm getting in 4 to 5 days a week now, so this will only require a little bit more effort.  

Goal 2:  Add strength-training 2 days a week for the next 2 weeks.  I'm doing push-ups right now, but need some leg and butt stuff.  I have weights at home and can do some deadlifts and squats even if I don't get to the gym.  The gym being closed wasn't that great of an excuse, but I used it.  The gym being open but my fear of Covid-19 exposure is only an excuse not to go to the physical gym building.  I can take some of my social media time and do a quick workout for the next two weeks.  

Reward:  Melissa Joulwan's Well Fed Weeknights cookbook.  

 

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I received magic mushroom powder and Hawaiian sea salt in the mail yesterday - I'm planning to make kalua pig next week from Nom Nom Paleo.  I can't remember whose journal I saw that in last week, but it sounds delicious.  I'm not even sure why I ordered the magic mushroom (I can't recall what recipe I was looking at), but I'm going to figure out a way to use it with ground beef for tonight's dinner.  

Day 27/60

Energy-9, Mood-9, Pain-0.  Awake at 6:20 am and up for a longer walk.  This is much better than I have been over the last week, but I really want to be waking naturally between 5:30 and 6:00.  I feel really great today, though! 

Progress on July goals:  I did 15 minutes of yoga last night - a friend came by late afternoon and we sat on the front porch and chatted for a few hours.  She drank her wine, I drank my club soda.  It was awesome!  That cut into my usual yoga time, so I did it late evening, before turning on the television.  

This morning, I added air squats in-between my push-up sets.  I broke a bit of a sweat in the 10 minutes I was working through that.   

M1-chicken salad and celery over garden greens.  I'm doing ok with this little bit of curry.  I probably have another day or two before this is gone, then I'll go nightshade-free for five days.  

M2-The final bit of chicken and zucchini.  It was good heated in ghee with some spinach added for last night's dinner.  I'll probably do the same thing for lunch.  

M3-Is a ground beef stir fry weird?  Ground beef and broccoli with magic mushroom powder and some coconut aminos.  Tomorrow's grocery day, I don't have any other meats!

I'm going to take my bike for a tune-up today.  My friend and I decided last night we would start riding bikes together.  I'm so excited about this!  I have not ridden my bike in exactly 10 years - I did a sprint triathalon the July of the summer I turned 40.  That was the last time I rode my bike.   

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The ground beef and broccoli was delicious at first, but quickly got tiresome.  I think I put too much mushroom powder in it.  I have lots of leftovers, and I think adding spinach to it will make it more palatable.  Bike tune-up....I went out to load my bike into the back of my vehicle, but couldn't find my bike!  I forgot that I told my husband to give it to Salvation Army last time he cleaned out the garage, lol!  I had researched where and how much it would cost to have it tuned and get new tires but then had to go back and research a new bike.  I was able to find one that cost less than the tune-up would have, and drove 40 minutes to pick it up.  So now I have a new bike! It has only one gear, but luckily it's pretty flat around here.  My brief ride down the street demonstrated my need to develop leg strength, but it will come.  I'm excited to ride!  A long yoga session last night was tough - I'm a little sore today, I think between the yoga, the brief bike ride, and the squats.  

Day 28/60

Energy-9, Mood-8, Pain-2.  Awake at 5:00 a.m. this morning, laid in bed until 5:30 (may have drifted back to sleep) - yay!  This is what i want, to get up easily at 5:30 after a good night's sleep.  Got dressed and took the dog walking, ugh so hot and humid even that early.  I had planned a long walk, but pain was evident from early on, so I only did 1 1/2 miles.  

Progress on July goals:  Goal 1:  I did an hour of an intense yin class last night - I'm usually able to hold the poses for the specified time, but I struggled last night.  I think that's a testament to what happens when I don't keep up with the practice.  I'm looking forward to how much improvement I make in my flexibility this month.  Goal 2:  I did my push-up training and 5 lunges/leg in-between each set.  I rode by my gym at 2:00 yesterday afternoon.  It didn't look too crowded...maybe next week.  

M1:  Chicken salad with celery

M2:  Leftover beef and broccoli with spinach

M3:  Chicken Caesar salad

I started listening to Atomic Habits during my walk this morning.  It's very eye-opening.  The idea of developing systems for doing things rather than goals - everyone wants to lose weight, but it's the ones that make changes to their system of doing things that are successful.  And the idea that small changes and choices everyday add up over time, but may not be noticeable until you level-up.  The idea that an ice cube doesn't start to melt in a cold room even though the temperature steadily rises until that temp reaches 33.  Everything makes great sense so far.  I feel like I knew these things, but the book brings clarity and structure to what I knew.  I'm within the safety of my W60 right now, but I have the worry in the back of my mind about what happens in the afterward.  

Plan for the day is to go for a bike ride and then decide if I want to brave the beach.  It's going to be very crowded, I'm sure.  I also need to shop for groceries.  I meal-planned yesterday.  

 

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Hello MadyVanilla! I am a Whole30 newbie on Day 3 of the program. I'm checking out the forums for the first time today. I was skimming through yours, and I want to tell you that you are an inspiration! :) Good job on making it to day 28 of 60! You are so ambitious to go for a Whole60; that's a Long. Time.

In one of your early posts, you are beating yourself up about not doing the things you know you should do and reading and playing video games instead. That definitely resonates with me! Adulting is HARD! LoL One thing that I found helped me was setting little (and few) goals so as to not get overwhelmed. DO ALL THE THINGS is wonderful, but I'd get burnt out, and feel like a discouraged failure if I did some of the things and not the others, the ones I know I'm putting off.. I found a "To-Do List" where each page is TWO THINGS. You could check off two boxes and know that you accomplished something and celebrate the little victories and small steps (like your ice cube example!). So "Work Out EVERY DAY" turned into "work out for 30 minutes today" or "go on a long walk." A list of 30 things turned into a list of the two I knew were reasonable but NEEDED to happen. And this was progress. More progress than before. It was a good start. Something as opposed to Nothing. On my less ambitious days, this is what I need.

Also, as to the books, video games, and journaling, there's definitely something to be said for limiting time and doing other necessary and healthy things, but also... "Time you enjoy wasting is not time wasted." ;) Don't be TOO hard on yourself.

Thank you for sharing so much! I look forward to reading some future posts.

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Thank you, @Kirra and welcome!  I feel like I'm taking this round much more seriously than I have ones in the past.  Previously, I "winged" it and didn't take seriously changing my relationship with food and dealing with all the emotional crap.  But I'm working on it this time, and I so appreciate the encouragement and advice!   I love the idea of a to-do list of two things.  I do tend to make a giant list and accomplish all or most of it when I'm feeling good, and then neglect/avoid to make a list when I'm wallowing.  But just two things is doable every day...  

18 hours ago, Kirra said:

"Time you enjoy wasting is not time wasted."

This!!!  I need to keep this in mind!  

 

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Five mile bike ride yesterday, and it was wonderful!  I will be building upon this, and can't wait for my friend to join my on these jaunts.  I can't believe I let so much time go by between bike rides...Grocery-shopped on two sites, comparing prices.  How am I ever going to have time for all this when I go back to work in the office?  Ugh...I still have another month, in that time I can work on stream-lining this process.  

Day 29/60

Mood-9, Energy-9, Pain-0.  I woke up this morning ready to go. Walked the dog and actually wanted to walk a little longer than I have been.  No pain, but I did take meds last night due to some excess achiness.  The achiness was well-earned, though, between the bike and an extra-long yoga session.  

Progress on July goals:  Goal 1: 90-minute intense yin last night - excellent session.  I was able to stay in poses unlike the previous night and able to work at keeping my thoughts in the present.  Goal 2:  I've done my 2-days of strength training this week, and am taking today off from both the push-ups and from leg exercises.  

M1:  Curry chicken salad.  One more serving left of this...I can't believe i'm saying I'm sick of eating chicken salad.  Next week will involve egg and shrimp salads.

M2:  Rest of the beef and broccoli with spinach.  The spinach really does help cut that extra mushroom powder I added - very good!

M3:  Fourth of July gathering tonight, with barbecue at a friend's house.  She told me they are having burgers and brats and that I should bring a side I could eat.  I made broccoli salad yesterday - homemade mayo with softened dates along with red wine to make the sauce.  I added compliant bacon and red onion - it tastes just like regular broccoli salad!  I was surprised by how well the dates blended and how good the sauce is.  Maybe it's my newly sensitive taste buds, we'll see if anyone else eats it tonight.  Anyway, I'm guessing my dinner is going to be a burger and broccoli salad.  

Plan for today includes a bike ride, followed by yoga, shower, then reading this really good book I'm currently in to until it's time to go to barbecue.  

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23 hours ago, MadyVanilla said:

I started listening to Atomic Habits during my walk this morning.  It's very eye-opening.  The idea of developing systems for doing things rather than goals - everyone wants to lose weight, but it's the ones that make changes to their system of doing things that are successful.  And the idea that small changes and choices everyday add up over time, but may not be noticeable until you level-up.  The idea that an ice cube doesn't start to melt in a cold room even though the temperature steadily rises until that temp reaches 33.  Everything makes great sense so far.  I feel like I knew these things, but the book brings clarity and structure to what I knew.  I'm within the safety of my W60 right now, but I have the worry in the back of my mind about what happens in the afterward.   

The bits and pieces I've heard from this book sound so interesting! This sounds like a great companion for this time as you are thinking of your post W30/W60 life. This way of eating is too restrictive for most of us to maintain over many months or many years. But I love what you're saying about small choices that add up. This is a pleasant antidote to my former way of "all or nothing" thinking ("well, I already had some gluten, and it's only 9:45 am, so I might as well spend the rest of the day face-planting into this package of Mint Milanos").

Excited about your bike, too. Cheers for pleasure that comes from being active!

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Day 30 came and went and was also the first day that I have not journaled since pre-W30.  It was a good day, I just didn't take my usual morning time to journal, then couldn't catch up with it as the day progressed.  I ate well, got some exercise, spent time at the beach.  Made kalua pig for dinner - OMG this was delicious!  

Today would have been my first day of reintroduction had I not decided to extend to 60 days.  I think this was a good choice, as I have days where I still have pain, still nights where I don't sleep well, and I haven't really been tested with emotional stressors.  Overall, there have been HUGE improvements in these and other areas.  I did weigh myself - I've lost 13.5 pounds, which put me 6 pounds below where I was when quarantine started, so that's good.  I feel and look like I've lost more, but I know that's the side effect of eating good foods.  I cataloged my list of NSVs in the Day-by-Day book, but the above, plus improvements in my energy level, my skin (glowing, no more eczema on scalp and elbows) and no brain fog are the main ones.  These are certainly worth much more than the extremely short-term chemical pleasure derived from a package of cookies or a bag of chips.  I'm finding new ways to settle my emotions and other strategies for reacting to stress.  But I need more time - this has been my best W30 so far, and I want this one to finally be the one that sticks.  I'll be reading Food Freedom Forever as part of my morning coffee beginning tomorrow.  For the next 30 days, I will continue to focus on planning and meal preparation, building my tolerance for walking and bike-riding, returning to the gym to get in strength workouts, using strategies other than food for dealing with stress and emotions, and practicing yoga daily.  This will be fairly easy since I don't actually return to working in the office until August.  That's when I will be tested - my hope is to have strong practices and new habits in place by then.    

Day 31/60

Mood-9, energy-8, Pain-0.  Walked 3 miles in the heat yesterday.  I did have some hip pain and needed to stop and sit for a few minutes (pain-5).  I was able to recover and get through the rest of my day, which included walking down to the beach later in the day.   I slept really well last night, but had not the night before.  Plus, I had not been drinking as much water.  These two may be factors in the pain.  I have noticed before that I have more issues when I'm dehydrated.  

Progress on July goals:  1) I did a 10-minute yoga session after returning home from the bbq Saturday night.  I did a 40-minute session yesterday afternoon.  2) Took the weekend off from strength training, back to it this morning.  I moved down a level on pushups today (from three stairs to two stairs) and did 40 air squats.  

M1-Chicken salad-finally, this is gone.  Now, I'm doing the week completely nightshade-free. I'm going to go back through my journals and see where I've been with pain levels so that I have a comparison for next Monday.    

M2-leftover kalua pork over caesar salad.  Nom Nom paleo recipe.  This was so simple and just as delicious as everyone has reported.  

M3-Greek chicken tenders and salad.

I need to meal prep today-making sausage, egg salad, mayonnaise.  I'm considering a trip to the gym this afternoon.  It depends on whether or not I meet up for socially-distant coffee with a friend later today.  

 

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Interestingly, I haven't had a headache since Day 9.  And most of my flare-ups in pain appear to be related to extra consumption of nightshades (a few meals in a row with tomatoes and/or peppers) as well as poor sleep.  I wonder if the poor sleep is related to nightshade consumption.  So now I have a solid hypothesis to test out.  

It was good to read back over my journal.  I'm amazed by how much better I feel now than I did just a month ago.  And how much my anxiety/confidence/motivation has improved.  

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I'm not even sure what happened yesterday.  It wasn't a completely off-plan day, but I seemed to have lost my focus a little bit.  My friend called and asked about lunch instead of coffee, and had a craving for Chinese food.  I agreed, ordered a beef and broccoli without sauce, which came with fried rice and an egg roll.  I ate some of the rice and all of the egg roll, plus the fortune cookie.  I did go for a 5-mile bike ride afterward, with the intent to food prep when I got back home.  My husband was home from work, though, and asked if I wanted to go for dinner at the restaurant where our son is working.  I ordered a crab avocado appetizer that contained corn, tomato salsa and a ranch dressing drizzle (and it was delicious!).  For some reason, I was only concerned with not getting dairy or gluten - this is what I mean by losing my focus.  I also ordered a highly seasoned ahi tuna and ate a few of the homemade potato chips that came on the side.  And ate three honey-siracha wings.  They were so sweet, and so good.  I did avoid ordering an adult beverage, though I was tempted.  

Interestingly, I had some major sugar cravings last night (the honey on the wings!!!!) and almost caved.  There are Milanos in the pantry and I had the old thoughts about eating just a few and getting back on track tomorrow.  Which we well know is the beginning of the end - the unplanned, devil-calling dive into a sweet is in no way conducive to "getting back on track tomorrow." But I did short-circuit those thoughts, though they kept cropping up.  Clearly, this is related to my lunch and dinner, as I've not had any cravings in a long time.  I'm also a little achy through my knee and hip today, even though I haven't done anything other than my short morning walk.  Plus, I'm  bloated.  I slept horribly.  My self esteem took a bit of a shot, too, though getting back to morning routine helps with this.  Lots of side effects from a few, not too off-plan foods.  That's actually a little frightening, but enlightening.  The planned reintroduction in a few weeks will help me figure out which of those foods does what to me.  

Things I could have done differently:  Asked for just beef and broccoli, no rice or egg roll, especially since I already asked for no sauce.  Checked the restaurant menu before arriving-I was too confident in my ability to make a decision on the fly.  I'm not ready for that yet.  With the cravings-I was able to power my way through, but I know I won't always do that.  I think if I promise myself a time in the future to indulge in the treat that is calling me, that will help.  So I could tell myself, "I'll make the Milanos my dessert tomorrow night, when I can really enjoy them after dinner." I really want to focus on planning treats as opposed to indulging in the moment (except in the most rare of circumstances).  If I need to eat something in that moment of craving, a handful of almonds would be a choice.  

In the meantime, I reset - I got up and did a short walk with the dog.  Read a few pages of Food Freedom Forever.  I'm journaling.  I ate kulua pig for breakfast.  I need to do my push-ups/lunges. I need to make a list of things to accomplish today.  

Day 32/60 (can I even say this?? - I'm learning and working toward Food Freedom.  This wasn't my first, but definitely my worst derailment of this W60.  But I'm moving forward.  The key is that I'm learning)

Mood-6, Energy-7, Pain-1 No additional pain while walking, but definitely some low-level achiness today.  This is different than the pain I sometimes get during walks.  

Progress on July goals:  1) 15 minute yoga session when we got home from dinner late last evening.  2) I haven't done my strength training yet, but it's in the plan for today.  

M1-Kalua pig with a little pesto mayo to moisten it.  

M2-caesar salad with ground beef

M3-The Greek chicken tenders and salad originally planned for last night.  

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15 minutes ago, MadyVanilla said:

Day 32/60 (can I even say this?? - I'm learning and working toward Food Freedom.  This wasn't my first, but definitely my worst derailment of this W60.  But I'm moving forward.  The key is that I'm learning)

You can totally say this :)  I'm glad you're not beating yourself up about yesterday. Sounds like you enjoyed the night with your husband and son, and that you came away with valuable observations. I feel like that's what this food freedom thing is about.

My therapist says that food issues are the perfect avenue for self-discovery and growth, for two reasons: (1) it's impossible to get food 100% "right" all the time, and (2) anytime you feel like you get it "wrong," well — you'll have another opportunity in a few hours to try a new experiment. 

There's a lot more gray area with food than there is with a substance like alcohol, which we don't need to survive. All that gray area can be hard for personalities like me (heh) who really want to "check a box," get the gold star, and move on. But the blessing of food is that it invites us to reckon with ourselves at a deeper level, to explore our real hungers, and to honor to what truly feeds us.

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22 hours ago, Contessa said:

You can totally say this :)  I'm glad you're not beating yourself up about yesterday. Sounds like you enjoyed the night with your husband and son, and that you came away with valuable observations. I feel like that's what this food freedom thing is about.

My therapist says that food issues are the perfect avenue for self-discovery and growth, for two reasons: (1) it's impossible to get food 100% "right" all the time, and (2) anytime you feel like you get it "wrong," well — you'll have another opportunity in a few hours to try a new experiment. 

There's a lot more gray area with food than there is with a substance like alcohol, which we don't need to survive. All that gray area can be hard for personalities like me (heh) who really want to "check a box," get the gold star, and move on. But the blessing of food is that it invites us to reckon with ourselves at a deeper level, to explore our real hungers, and to honor to what truly feeds us.

I love this.  This round of W30 I've been much more introspective and courageous in exploring my emotional issues with food.  I always knew they were there, but I thought I could avoid them.  The fact that I keep returning to the same old habits says I can't.  I am also prone to the black/white, must-do-this-to-succeed ideal...but as you said, we keep getting chances to do it right.  With each chance I can examine and go a little deeper, or I can toss out that chance and start again with the next one.  And instead of each point in time being "right or wrong" I can get it right in the grand scheme of attaining a higher level of health and well-being.  

This is what attaining food freedom is about, isn't it?  It's not about being flexible with food choices, but about being flexible with thought processes.  I have such a long way to go, but I think this time, I'm in the right frame of mind to do this right  to learn and examine as I go along.  Still a long way to go :).  

I'm so glad you are still here - I appreciate your insightful comments.  Thank you!!!

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16 minutes ago, MadyVanilla said:

It's not about being flexible with food choices, but about being flexible with thought processes. 

Ooh. I'm just sitting here at my kitchen table nodding over your response. That bit about flexible thought processes really preaches. Yes!

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Yesterday was a good day of getting back on track, though I only ate meat for 2/3 meals.  The close to no carbs approach is maybe not the best thing to do, but it smashed the cravings I was having the night before.  I didn't get any extra exercise in, as I dealt with hip and knee deep achiness all day long.  And I STILL have not done meal prep for the week, my energy dipped throughout the day and my motivation just wasn't there.  However, today, I feel like I'm back to normal.  

I slept really well last night, and was awake up, and out the door with the dog before 6:00 am.

Day 33/60, day 2 no nightshades

Mood-8, Energy-9, Pain-0 current/2 while walking.  Lower back tightness and then knee started acting up during the morning walk.   I had intended on doing a little over two miles, but ended up at 1.6 because I took a shortcut home given the tightness.  

Progress on goals:  1) 40 minute yoga session yesterday 2) did push-up/leg routine yesterday and this morning. 

M1-3 eggs cooked in olive oil with red onion, spinach, 1/2 avocado and parsley.  

M2-kalua pig over cole slaw made with homemade mayo/vinegar sauce.  I'm not going to add dates to this sauce - even though it would be compliant, I'm wary of anything sweet right now.  

M3-Grilled chicken in compliant herb and citrus marinade, salted sliced cucumber, other 1/2 avocado, sweet potato with ghee

I WILL make mayo, sausage, and egg salad today.  Also, bike ride and a long yoga session in the cards.  

 

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Yesterday went as planned, including the bike ride and meal prep.  I fell asleep pretty easily, but woke up with a stressful dream (people I know doing something completely surprising and unexpected, it was as if I'd had a revelation - then I couldn't go back to sleep because I was wondering whether or not I was missing something in this relationship...)

Day 34/60 day 3 no nightshades

Energy-8, Mood-8, Pain 0; 2 while walking.  24 minutes into my walk, my knee started hurting.  This seems to be around the same time, whether I'm walking or doing C25K (which I haven't done in 2 weeks).  When I injured my knee last August, I couldn't walk for 7 minutes before having so much pain I had to stop, so this is improvement.  It's been a long, slow road.  I'd just like to be able to walk normally without the pain! Ugh!! 

Progress on July goals:  1)an hour of yoga yesterday; 2)push-ups and modified lunges this morning.  

M1:  Egg salad and homemade sausage.  It's ok.  Needs to be spicier, but I'm not eating red pepper right now...

M2: Kalua pig and coleslaw

M3:  Leftover chicken and a salad

Not sure what the day will bring - I"m off from work, supposed to be stormy this afternoon, though.  

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A year ago, I was averaging less than 20,000 steps per week (yes, per week).  I've been able to increase to the point where I've at least doubled that most weeks.  I have a 7,000 step/day goal (there were many days in the the last year where I was only getting about 2,000, even pre-Covid) that I've increased gradually from 5,000 steps.  A lot of these low-step days were due to significant knee and/or hip pain, but instead of trying to move some, I would stay as still as possible.  I've been working on increasing my movement, and through the W30 my swelling, inflammation, and pain has decreased significantly.  I think I'm ready to increase my daily step goal again, this time to 8,000.  I've reset my Fitbit, so here we go!  

It will be tough to attain this today, given the monsoon going on outside.  I did get out with the dog first thing this morning, between the bands of rain, but it was just a quick walk.  Starting everyday with at least 1,000 steps (and usually more) has made it easier to attain my daily goal.  It's been a pretty easy habit to develop, especially since my dog was quick to expect the morning walk.  In the book Atomic Habits, the author talks about building a new habit into ones that already exist and using time cues - so I've built this morning walk into the time/habit of waking in the morning.  Some mornings, I go out in my pajamas, some mornings I get fully dressed.  I'm glad and hopeful to continue this new habit.  The other thing the author says is that the mental grooves of bad habits remain intact, which is why it can be so easy to slip back into those old habits and so it's really important to maintain those hooks to the new habits.  Knowing this is powerful.  

Day 35/60, Day 4 no nightshades

Mood-7, Energy-6, Pain 0 

Progress on July goals: 1) 20 minute yoga session yesterday 2) I've met the goal of 2 strength days this week.  It's such a dreary, rainy day, I'm not really feeling like doing my pushups and leg exercises.  

M1:  egg salad, black coffee

M2: Chicken salad over romaine

M3: Fish and sweet potato chips, steamed broccoli

 

I  didn't sleep great last night (big glass of iced tea before bed) and the dog had me up at 5:00 am.  These types of days (tired, rainy) were often the kinds of days where I would lay on the couch and read all day and snack on chips, cookies, etc while napping off and on.  Luckily, I have an appointment at 12:30, so I can't do that, but I can imagine laying around reading the rest of the morning.  I'm not feeling an urge to snack, so that's positive.  I think that this type of environment is just what Atomic Habits talks about when discussing habits occurring with environmental cues.  But this is more about the physiological cues - I'm not feeling the desire to eat because my body is satisfied.  So that's part of it, too - when my needs are met, I'm nourished, bad habits don't have a place to flourish.  Just like the increasing movement - my body feels better, less achy and more energetic, and so I feel the need to move more.  The trick is going to be maintaining what got me to feel better physiologically, those habits are the key.  They are:

meal planning - this is number 1, and one of the hardest for me to maintain away from W30.  Even if I have a loose structure in my mind of what my meals will be, I'm good.  But in the past, I often failed to make a plan.  I need to set aside a specific time each week to review recipes, plan meals, and make my grocery list.  During the pandemic, I've had so much more free time, that I'm able to do this when the mood strikes.  I'll think over the next few days about what will make the most sense for me as far as best time for meal planning.  

meal preparation-this is a very close number 2, because I do very well when I can eat leftovers for breakfast and lunch.  Meal prep usually doesn't take me long and I'm pretty good with multi-tasking (i.e. this week, I started the eggs to hard boil, then mixed up the sausage and started cooking on the stove, then made mayonnaise while those things cooked.  I had everything cooked and cleaned up within 40 minutes.)  Meal prep most often occurs when I'm already cooking a meal, so I probably don't need to develop a specific habit routine for this.  

walking-the  wake-up and walk is good.  My worry is managing inclement weather days.  We've had two so far, but not so bad that we couldn't go out for at least a short walk.  I can have a "walk anyway" mentality which I think will work better for me.  Better to get up and head out the door, only to turn around at the end of the driveway.  

yoga-I'm in process of making a daily yoga practice.  My time cue revolves around the time my husband gets home from work, but before dinner.  This is working for now.  Pre-covid, I often went to a yoga class right after work, so the time is right.  

Moving back out into the work world is going to be my biggest challenge with maintaining my healthy habits.  

 

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Glad that you are ruminating on these questions. It seems like changing our habits or maintaining good habits does require this level of cogitation — what's working right now? where am I going to run into resistance? Where am I swimming with the current, and where is the current carrying me farther away? I'm excited to hear these layers of exploration. Bravo!

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Yesterday was my 28th wedding anniversary, so we went out to dinner.  I forgot about this when planning yesterday's meals! Dinner was restaurant-compliant:  I actually ended up eating a burger with no bun, topped with avocado and fried egg, a plain arugula tomato salad, and potato wedges.  I opted to not eat the tomato and go for the white potato. I also imagine the spices on the burger were red pepper-based.   My stomach was very unsettled a few hours later, uncomfortable, bloated, and it made me restless.  So, I'll take a few more days off of nightshades and try tomato.  Between reading back over my journal and noticing patterns and this experiment, it's pretty clear that at least white potatoes (spices TBD) are problematic for me.  Also, my blood pressure was up this morning - I'm not sure if that's related, but my bp has been very stable for weeks.  Another marker to attend to.  

Day 36/60, Day 1 of no nightshades

Mood-7, Energy-8, Pain-0/2 while walking.  I was able to walk 29 minutes this morning before experiencing pain in the knee/hip/low back.  

Progress on July goals-1: 10 minutes yoga last night 2: met strength-based goals earlier this week.  

M1-3 eggs, homemade sausage, banana fried in olive oil all cooked and mixed together.  I didn't finish it - so much food, but delicious! 

M2-chicken salad over garden greens

M3-ground beef stuffed sweet potato.  It's pretty challenging to find a hot-summer-day appropriate ground beef recipe that is not a hamburger or full of nightshades.  I'm going to make a Mexican-styled ground beef (with cumin, onion, garlic, oregano, sea salt, black pepper and coriander and no chili powder) stuff it in a sweet potato and top with mashed avocado.  

Cleaning the house and going for a bike ride later.  Today seems like a good day for a long yoga session, too.  

I'm thinking Saturday mornings will be a good day for meal planning and starting my grocery list.  I'm moving back toward Walmart pick-up, so this will give me a chance to get an order started and pick a later day in the week for pick-up.  The only problem with this plan is that I will be working about a week ahead.  We'll see how it goes.  

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