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Day 30!!! This was by far the easiest round. I credit that to not even having the opportunity to eat out, having ALL the time in the world to prep and cook and shop, and having no outside pressures at

Good morning! Day... 18?  The last couple of nights I have struggled to get to sleep due to to twitchy legs. It's been really weird. It's like there's this twitch in my lower back that makes my l

Meal 1: Thai Green Curry tuna patties with steamed broccolini and spicy mayo Meal 2: OMG, I went to the supermarket and they had this amazing standing rib roast on clearance, so cheap! So I snapp

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Happy Saturday :)

It turned out to be a really nice day here today, so the doggo and I just got back from a 1.5 hour walk. It was lovely.

Meal 2 will be roast pork with crackling, baked apple, balsamic and chilli sauce, roasted beets, carrots, parsnip and celeriac and sauteed broccolini.

Meal 1 will be whatever I grab from the fridge shortly, probably a quick omelette with mushrooms, spinach, and jamon :)

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Sunday! It's cold and a bit miserable here, and we don't have anything to do, so it's a very lazy day.

Meal 2 is lamb backstraps on a root veggie puree, sauteed broccolini and shaved brussel sprouts in a lemon tahini dressing. 

Meal 1: Eh, don't know. It's getting towards 2pm and I need to have something but I just haven't decided yet...

 

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Meal 1 was lamb chop curry on cauli/brocc rice. Boring, but I was hungry. Hubster wasn't hungry and I kept putting off eating, then we had to duck out and he got fried chicken and chips which he then ate in the car (the fecking smell was killing me), then he was worried his blood sugar was crashing so we stopped for chocolate, so by the time we got home I was ready to eat my arm. 

I'm getting very tempted to eat off plan foods. Not out of craving, or desire but it's that weird rebellious thing, if that makes sense. I've been quite down, and anxious, and tired and that makes me want to throw my hands up and just chow down on stuff that I know will make me feel like garbage. I've really been resisting a gin and soda. Pre-this round, and between most rounds, we tend to drink every weekend and some weeknights, and I've now gone 6 weeks, and I don't miss it, really, but again with the blah and anxiety and everything, the "feck it, just do it" is strong, but I don't want to break this streak, y'know?

Anywhoo. So cases of Covid are going up here, and so our state government has extended lockdowns, so it looks like life is going to just keep trundling the way it is, so I need to get out of this funk. I've been getting out for walks, which is good. TKD holiday program starts in a week tomorrow, so I'm REALLY looking forward to that. 

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OK, super lazy dinner - leftover roast pork with apple, balsamic, chilli sauce, and mashed cauli with harrisa and tahini. 

So I have been noticing my anxiety has been getting really bad, as has my grumps/anger. But when I eat, they lessen heaps. I'm not not eating, I'm not extending between meals any further, I'm not eating smaller meals, I'm getting plenty of fat. It's weird. But tomorrow, if I start getting anxiety in the morning, I'm going to have food and see it if helps. Maybe the intermittent fasting isn't working for me, despite not getting hungry til later.

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You just listed 3 of the 5 ingredients in my evening tea! :D It also has catmint and valeian, which is really helpful for sleeping. I only have it of an evening though because of the valerian, maybe I need some without for during the day. 

Most of my anxiety tends to be work related, even when that's not reasonable at all - I guess I don't really have anything else to stress about. It's just been such a weird year and just staying weird. I really want to go see my mom and BFF but that's not on the cards for the foreseeable future, their state is still enforcing 14 day quarantine on anyone coming in. 

Monday. So, I am wondering if I should start doing a reintro, just because I have stayed compliant since finishing, save for the one tiny sugar in my bacon reintro, which I don't think really counts. But I can't think of anything I really want. 

Oh, NS... V, I guess - I'm going by clothes size and staying off the scale, and I have an item of clothing which is definitely too big, but sadly it's my bra. Sob. Why couldn't it be my jeans??

Food for today. 

Meal 2 will be the lamb backstrap we didn't have yesterday with the pureed root veg and sauteed broccolini

Meal 1, not really sure. I've had a hankering for tuna salad, so if I haven't decided its too cold by then, I'll whip up a new batch of mayo and have it with lettuce cups

 

 

 

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I feel like I've been fibbing in my log, though it's not been intentional. It just occurred to me because I've been thinking about where I'm at since my round finished and assessing whether I have been non-compliant at all. Really, the only thing is that pretty much every night since I finished, I have had a square of my prune, nut and seed slice with a pot of tea of an evening. They're quite small and not very sweet at all - I didn't add any sugar or sweetener, so the only sweet is the dried fruit in the seed mix, and the prunes which bind it all together. The nut/seed to prune ration is pretty high, to its more an occasional taste of sweet among the crunch, and I quite like it. 

So summary is:

I have been compliant save for one meal of my bacon which was cured with brown sugar and maple (rinsed off prior to smoking), and the prune/nut slice, which is all compliant ingredients but would be in the same vein as an RX bar (with less sugar, to be fair - 3.3g per serving)

So I'm not considering this another round, but it's good to know that I'm still on track. If I really, really wanted something non-compliant I would have it, but that hasn't come up yet. 

 

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So hungry today!! Not really tempted to go off plan, but I ended up having a fruit and seed bar, and then finishing the tuna and eggs salad, which should have been 2 meals (130g tuna, 3 boiled eggs, 2tbs mayo). I need to give myself a kick and remember that just because i ate more than my regular 2 meals a day, I'm not "messing up" or doing anything wrong. Genuine hunger deserves actual food. It's not like a polished off a bag of chips. If I'm hungry enough for tuna salad, I'm actually hungry. This is the part of regulating my eating that I struggle with, it gets a bit compulsive and lends into the all or nothing or toxicity. 

I'm still struggling staying off the scale though. Not knowing that number makes me constantly think "What if you're not losing, or even gaining? you might not realise until you notice your clothes are too tight!!" ugh. Smack me in the brain. 

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2 hours ago, SchrodingersCat said:

I need to give myself a kick and remember that just because i ate more than my regular 2 meals a day, I'm not "messing up" or doing anything wrong. Genuine hunger deserves actual food. It's not like a polished off a bag of chips. If I'm hungry enough for tuna salad, I'm actually hungry.

This really is the hard part - believing if you're hungry, you should eat.  But I know myself that that is such a treacherous statement/thought.  When I think "eat" I think "brownies."  But thinking "tuna salad" is so much healthier.  I don't know what I'm trying to say - I guess just that that's the process-same body cues, but a different, healthier thought/solution is the way to Food Freedom Forever.  Easier said then done, but I hope I'm doing it like you when I get to that point.  

I LOL'ed at your NSV....what cruel W30 gods decided that a smaller bra size was movement in the right direction????   I hope smaller jeans are in the very near future!!!!

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Happy Tuesday!

So I went an did my usual fish Tuesday shopping, and half way through got so anxious, it was terrible. I was also hungry, and ended up buying this bag of choco/nut/orange balls (again, all compliant ingredients but 100% SWYPO, like RX bar balls). I had 3 (1 serve) and they were delicious, and my anxiety was immediately under control. I'm wondering if it is a bloody sugar thing?

Anyway:

Snack: 3 choc orange date balls

Meal 1: Prawn laksa (vegan laksa paste, shrimp paste, fish sauce, sambal, chicken stock and coconut milk) with straw mushrooms, water chestnuts and broccoli, and sweet potato glass noodles

Meal 2: Seared salmon with broccolini, sauteed carrots and baby beans. Not sure on sauce/flavour yet.

 

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H

O

L

Y

Sheet.

So, there's one of the clearest, most unequivocal reintro answers ever. Can I still drink red wine? HELL NO.

Yes, I had a few glasses but over the course of the evening, and drank more than 2L of water as well.

I was up at 2:30am with horrific heartburn, never got back to sleep due to racing mind, got up 4-5 times to go to the bathroom with gastric distress, had to take MORE antacids at 5am, have a headache, achey joints, anxiety and a hugely sour stomach. There is nothing fun or ok about this!!

I feel like hot garbage, and not even in a hangover kind of way, literally in a I feel like I've been slightly poisoned kind of way. BLERGH. Guess who's staying on the wagon?

No idea on today's food, I have NO interest in it. But it will be W30, and nutritious. I also have a video chat with my cooking gals tonight, no set recipe, just whatever we feel like, so I'll think of something kind of fun. 

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Oh, dear. So sorry about yesterday's heartburn! That sounds dreadful. Yes, red wine can be pretty vicious. I wonder if it's the sulfates that your body doesn't like (they do make some decent sulfate-free red wines). But maybe it's just... red wine.

I hope you're feeling better and glad that you have a tried-and-true approach to return to!

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Thanks @Contessa!

Tummy has been narky all day, I still have heartburn though I'm trying not to take anything for it. I still have a headache and feel yuck.

I ate the rest of the choc orange balls (3 of them) to get rid of the damn things and I will not buy any more. They're too darn tempting!!!

Lunch was 3 boiled eggs and dill pickle mixed with mayo and grainy mustard, and a serve of spicy kraut (my gut needs the probiotics!)

Dinner will be lamb koftas (lamb mince, garlic, cumin, pine nuts, mint bound with egg), some coconut yogurt tzatziki and sauteed broccolini, julienned carrots and baby beans

 

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Ugh, super munchie today. 2 squares of my fruit and seed thingy, a couple of pickles, a pack of pistachios and a couple slices of roast pork with mustard. On top of meals and the choc orange balls. All compliant ingredients, but just eat, eat, eat. This is yet another reason I am going to stay away from the booze. 

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Blugh, second night of crappy sleep, not as bad but not great, and I feel yuck and bloated. It's crazy, because when I look at everything I ate yesterday, not a single thing of it wasn't W30/paleo compliant, but it was all together so much more food than I've been having and it made me feel garbage. Plus I now have the attendant food guilts and demon on my shoulder telling me how bad I messed up and that I may as well just go and eat a whole pizza, or something. My body's issues with food are so easy compared to my mental ones!

But, at least I'm feeling better today than I was yesterday and hopefully won't have the similar uncontrolled munchies.  I still have gastric issues, unsurprisingly, I reckon that will take a few days to pass.

Meal 1: Dunno. Kind of uninspired. I do have a bit of a hankering for soup, maybe a creamy bacon and broccoli one, I have half a can of coconut milk I need to use.

Meal 2: Pork steaks, chilli, balsamic apple sauce, and roasted veggie medly I reckon. 

 

 

 

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@SchrodingersCat Do you think that all of the snacking, even though compliant, but the snacking between meals leads to the feeling on yuck?  And if so, why?  What is going on?  Is it the hormones that get all out of whack?  I am making a connection between feeling greatest to also being on the days that I don't snack.  I just wish I knew exactly what the reason was for it.  It would be easy to say to myself, "Oh I'm feeling off today because (cue up the reason here)," and not just that I'm feeling off because I was snacking.  

Too bad about the wine.  On the bright side, no more neuro toxins for you! 

Seriously though, I hope that you continue to feel better. 

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