Rojo's Food Log

[Rojo]

Well, I am on day three! I had a migraine last night, which was odd, because I am not prone to headaches and I was about 90 percent paleo before this Whole30. I was being a little too optimistic and a bit full of my physical capabilities.

Making the last of the grains in the house for the kids is not as hard as I thought, but it is still hard. I can't throw those things out. There's only a little left; we will use up what we have. The hard part is the smell of them cooking. I can handle the raw oat smell, but once they get cooking my mouth waters. Ah, well. It's life. Anyone can do anything for 30 days if they focus and believe it is worth it. I believe this is worth it. Now my kids....they eat what I eat. To be cliche: I am not a short order cook. Period. In turn, my kids do have the options of declaring they don't like something and setting it aside (after) they have tasted one bite. You can't form an honest opinion without a base of knowledge and experience. I feel strongly about this one statement in life. Needless to say, I try lots of things -- sometimes two, three, and four hundred times. (Sometimes you really have to be sure!)

So. Day three. I have to focus on this day, not the next 27. If I focus on how many days I have left I'll start shivering inside. I will focus on today and imagine that the rest of this journey I start to wake up like Sleeping Beauty rising from a nasty carb flu, glorious and full of life.

What is different for me, is that this way of eating is not a 30 day trial. Most of my trigger and binge foods are encompassed in the dairy, grain, sugar, and alcohol categories. I have been through a 12 step program. I know that, for me, one bite sends me back to three day binges, which lands me back in my diseased thinking about food. So again, I can't think past today. I have to put one Whole30 foot in front of the other and take each step as if it is my first and last step. I hope to someday be able to eat certain things in moderation, but as it stand right now I don't think it is wise to even go there mentally into 'what happens next'.

I'll be posting my food here, I guess. In the replies. I will write on pad and paper and post here at the end of the night. If there is an easier, more streamlined way to do it, please let me know! My brain always wants to pick the most complicated way to a solution.

Oh, and my name is Rojo, because A) I have red hair, and, Because when I was in grade school I was an obese kid. One of my "friends" called me Grande Rojo. I think it will be a sweet satisfaction to maybe turn the negativity of that moniker into something wonderful!

[Rojo]

Day 3

Breakfast: Lamb meat stewed in tomato sauce, celery, onions, and coffee

*2.7 mile walk

Lunch: Pumpkin, coconut milk, pumpkin pie spice, stewed lamb meat, green tea

Dinner: Pumpkin w/coconut milk/spices, tuna, 1/2 avocado, paleo mayo, Jicima, Yogi ginger tea

Head is hurting tonight again. Pretty tired, but clear. I feel like my whole body is heavy, but that there's this underlying feeling of well-being. My tummy is no longer puffed out and the composition of my body is changing slightly already. Strange.

The pastry case at Starbucks was awful. I am not going inside anymore. Proud of myself for focusing, breathing, distracting, praying - anything I could - to get my mind off the obsession. I almost hid from my kids and cried in private. Not my proudest moment, but I made it through a whole woman.

[Rojo]

All I have left for the kids to finish off is the rest of the oatmeal! I made them paleo snacks today, and they've been eating meals with us. So far so good. The turnip puree last night was a hit. I have to remember this!

[Spinnin Jenny]

How did you fix the turnip puree?

[Rojo]

I peeled, cut, and boiled until fork tender. I put them in a bowl with some ghee, scallions, sage, and a bit of salt. I used my immersion blender, but I am sure you could use the food processor. And viola! Pureed turnips.

[Rojo]

Day 4:

Breakfast: Almond crusted pork chops fried in ghee (2), blueberries w/coconut milk, 1 cup black coffee

*Zumba, burpees, and some other random HIIT movements

Lunch: Almond crusted pork chop (1), raw cauliflower, 1/2 avocado, rice vinegar w/garlic salt, pumpkin w/coconut milk, green tea

Snack: Apple, 10 Brazil nuts, dandelion tea

Dinner: eggs, zucchini, tomatoes, green onions, ghee, 1/2 avocado, 1 Tbsp. paleo mayo, 1/2 cup frozen berries w/coconut milk

Doing pretty good today...a little more morning energy, so I pushed my workout a bit. Post 3 p.m. was down hill. A little snappy, tired, but feel good underneath it all. My husband is amazed at how flat my stomach is. (I am too.) It feels good not to have that bloat going on. I felt really good during my workout, but it was hard to start for some reason. I was dealing with a bit of anxiety today, but was able to work through it. I really wanted that 3 p.m. Starbucks....but decided to go home, eat a snack, drink some tea, and rest. I feel my body working at healing. Right around now is when I usually quit. I really want this. I want to make it. I need to make it. This is really a matter of life and death for me.

[Derval]

You will make it.

[anniem]

http://whole9life.com/2013/01/whole30-timeline/

You can get through this! Ck out the link above from the whole30 blog about the timeline. I was a PITA the first week! I know about the NEED and MUST do this! You will! I will! We'll do it together!

[Kaleena]

My first 6 days or so were pretty ugly. I'm on 10 now and feeling peppy. You'll get through it and I can't wait to read about it!!!

[Rojo]

Thank you for the support.

*woke up at 4 am ready to go. So strange for me. We have been adhering to an 8pm bedtime since starting this week. I did things in the morning I never thought possible...like cleaning, cooking, doing yoga. It was a completely different experience for me to be up, and productive. I like it.

Breakfast: Seafood blend in marinara, steamed swiss chard, green tea

Snack: 1/2 pack of almonds (.75 ounces), black coffee)

Lunch: chicken thigh, red leaf lettuce, a whole yellow pepper, green tea

Dinner: Chicken thigh, raw cauliflower, 2 tsp. garlic olive oil, vinegar, 1/2 an avocado

I can't believe a handful of nuts sustained me. I can't believe I had energy today. I felt so clear. I had a moment in my a.m. yoga...I was so connected to my energy. I actually cried a bit, because it was so beautiful and clear. Ran errands without an afternoon slump. No headache today. I want to cry right now, because I feel so full and at peace with food. Dinner was pleasurable to my palate, but it was this utilitarian event that was full of relief for me...no heightened responses, cues to keep eating past fullness, and rebound hunger. I'm so thankful. Usually, I can't bear the thought of leaving my house past 5pm, due to exhaustion, but we have plans tonight and I don't have that dread, that mind over matter struggle to get out the door. This is wonderful. Truly.

[Kaleena]

I was having such clarity and focus during a dance practice that I almost cried! : )

[Rojo]

I was having such clarity and focus during a dance practice that I almost cried! : )

What kind of dance do you do? I used to be a modern dancer.

[Rojo]

Day 6

Last night we passed up drinks and snacks. My husband and I opted for tea instead. On the way home I was so incredibly sleep, and it wasn't even ten yet! Amazing. I used to wake up at nine or ten at night, and have a terrible time winding down before three a.m.

*woke up with the sun this morning feeling refreshed. My limbs felt so good, so warm and alive.

Breakfast: eggs, zucchini, swiss chard, ghee, pineapple, coconut milk/unsweetened coconut flakes, oolong tea

*little puffy in eyes and upper sinuses

Snack: 12 almonds, oolong tea

Lunch: salmon, grilled veggies (onion, mushrooms, peppers, zucchini), 1/2 baked yam

*little puffy in eyes and upper sinuses, became extremely tired after this meal

Dinner: ground beef, onions, red leaf lettuce, 1/2 avocado, vinegar, salsa, fresh tomatoes

I added in some higher sugar fruit today at breakfast, and a baked yam last minute at lunch. I really felt the effects. I think I need to drink more water as well. I tend to slump when I eat more fruit/starch and skimp on my water supply. After breakfast/lunch my under eyes puffed out A little tired post 4 p.m. It could have been the shopping trip with my mom, as that was a little emotionally stressful. I also had my meals at odd times. I am finding my body likes routine, even though I am opposite of a routine keeper. I love that eating now has a beginning, middle, and clear end. Poor Peter is taking a little longer snapping out of the grumps. I have to really detach myself from his mood and be patient.

My eyes are getting puffy after certain meals. I think it might either be starch, bell peppers, coconut, avocado, eggs. I'm going to keep going through to the end and be a little more strict in what I eat to pinpoint what is causing this reaction...because right now there are too many variables in my meals.

My tummy was so watery today. No pain, no bloating, no distress, just watery. I think it will take my body a while to adjust and clear out all the gunk. I am confident this will improve with time. If not, I'll start experimenting with certain veggies, rotating them in and out. Maybe the thing irritating my sinuses and eyes is the same thing effecting my colon? Sorry for the TMI. I am trying to keep a detailed log in one place!

[Rojo]

Day 7

All is good with the world.

9:40 - Veggie/Turkey chili, 1/4 head steamed purple cabbage w/ghee, oolong tea

1:00 (pre-hike) hard boiled egg

3:30 (post-hike) 1/3 blood orange, 14 pistachios, hard boiled egg, pumpkin w/coconut milk and spices

*herbal tea from Starbucks on the way home

6:00 Veggie/Trukey Chili, 1/4 head steamed purple cabbage, spaghetti squash, ghee

Woke with the sun again and I am loving it! This is just awesome.

[Rojo]

Day 8

7:30 - shrimp, ghee, swiss chard, oolong tea

*coffee date w/aunt, had an americano

12:30 - Herb spring mix, seasoned bison w/onions, guacamole, fresh tomato slices

6:00 - Cauliflower, ghee, shrimp, Jasmine Tulsi tea

I woke up feeling a little emotional today...this sadness hung over me like a heavy blanket. I tried to breathe and pray. I ended up watching something that could make me laugh and that helped a great deal. Getting in gear and hitting the ground also helped get my mind off the emotion. I had a rough moment in Costco. It wasn't the samples, or the stress that this was literally my fifth errand of the day that got me; it was the huge bag of chocolate chips I pondered in my hands for a school project. It was large bag of corn bread mix, and the Ghirardelli brownies my grandma used to make me. I started to feel like my best friend had died. After wandering up and down those isles aimlessly, I knew I had to get out - out of my head, out of the memories, out of trigger isles, out of the mentality of saying good bye. I really had to dig deep and surround myself with positive images, like being able to run errands all day and come home and cook dinner (and do the dishes!). This reality I am living hardly ever happened in my pre-Whole30 days. I'd really like more of this clarity, freedom from food obsession, and hunger awareness. My body feels so good right now. It is almost seven and I have been going all. day. long. When you live so long with war in your head, the break leaves a calm that is an, almost, unbearable gift...makes my heart ache with gratitude. I have to remember what chronic mental, emotional, and physical pain feels like. I hiked with my family yesterday. I made it to the top of a hill we have attempted three times before. I made it. My fuel was an egg. As I ate the egg, I thought..."Is this really going to carry me through three hours?" Sure enough the egg did it. To not be benched today, after that kind of outing, is truly astounding. I used to have to recover for days, literally days, to be able to get active again. I feel my insides healing, unraveling in a delicious way. Sex in the morning? Yes, please! Hikes on the weekend? Yes, Please! Sustained energy throughout my day? Uh, yeah Natural gentle responses to hunger? Hell, yeah! I'll take it!

I feel...good.

[Rojo]

Day 9

7:20 - Shrimp in ghee w/spices, roasted Brussels sprouts, .75 cup pumpkin w/1/4 cup light coconut milk and grated coconut flakes (only ate half, at other half w/lunch)

10:00 - hard boiled egg, 1/2 apple

*11:20 went for a walk and did some yoga to stretch out

12:50 - Spaghetti squash, seasoned pan-browned bison w/onions, other half of pumpkin dish, Tulsi tea

5:00 - roasted Brussels, 3 scrambled eggs in ghee, 1/2 cup blueberries w/light coconut milk and grated coconut flakes (unsweetened)

Today has been rough. I feel like I'm back on day two. My energy completely went downhill after my walk/yoga. I got extremely cold and the soreness in my muscles has gone full blow - lower legs and quads are screaming. I wore my Vibrams on the hike and I always seem to work every part of my leg brutally when climbing and coming down in those particular shoes. I have not had any inflammation in my face today, which is a plus. I forgot to chart that my eyes flared up last night on the way home from Trader Joe's. It's not just my energy, it is my whole mood and demeanor. I really had to work through it mentally. I had to go through some positive scripts in my head and focus hard on all the positive changes that have been happening lately. For me right now, I am having major food thoughts about brownies, pastries, sugary coffee, the dessert at tonight's gathering. I am trying to have a positive attitude. I'd really like to soothe myself with those foods. But whether I soothe myself with them or not, I am still left with the problem of unchecked, undealt with, mis-managed stress, emotions, and angst. (What the hell do you do with all this crap? I seriously hate emotion.) I am on the verge of tears the compulsion is so strong tonight. I know I can make it through this. I know. I can do this. I had dinner. I feel full, but still so empty. We have plans tonight. I don't want to be around people, but I think this might be best for me. Maybe I will be able to get out of my head. This lady always makes the best dessert. Well, I better get off this computer and do some deep breathing and focusing. I want this so bad. I need to make it through. There are always going to be challenging days. One moment of escape is not worth it.

[Rojo]

Day 10

I am barely rolling in today. I almost left my house and binged more than five times. I was literally gritting my teeth at one point. As far as energy goes I was bottoming out all day long. I woke up with extremely puffy eyes and draining sinuses (started last night at social event - I nursed black coffee and had a great time with friends). At one point I cried. Yes, I cried, because the desire to binge was so great. Ugh. I guess crying over sugar and wheat is okay, as long as I don't take it back.

It was not the most stellar day today. It is an act of God I am still in this. I am questioning right now if I can hang, or will choose to hang. I'm having to focus, focus, focus and pull all my will up to get through this right now. Yikes. I honestly do not know how much of this craving I can take. It is completely emotional. I have been full all day long. Each time I assess my hunger I am not hungry for real food. I want to shove my face with desserts. This is not legitimate hunger.

M1 - veggie meatloaf, 1/2 baked oriental yam, ghee, oolong

*americano

M2 - hard boiled egg, banana, 4 brazil nuts, 1 tsp natural calm

M3 - veggie meatloaf, 1/2 baked oriental yam, holy basil tea

M4 - Pot roast, coconut milk, banana, frozen pineapple (smoothie)

Lower on veggies today, because it was all I could do in the mix of things to make myself eat. I'm going to believe that I can make it until bedtime without getting that scone. I'm going to believe that I can do this. I am going to believe tomorrow will be better.

One good perk today: I didn't crap my colon out.

[Derval]

Good colon news and well done for staying strong.

[Rojo]

Thanks, Derval!

Day 11

What a difference a day makes.

M1 - Salmon, eggs, ghee, swiss chard, chai tea w/cocnut milk

*myofascial release massage

M2 - little slice of meat loaf, fresh veggie juice

*gym/errands

M3 - organic greens, hard boiled egg, garlic olive oil, 1/2 avocado, garlic salt grinder

*chai w/coconut milk, turmeric, ginger, cinnamon (holy yum!!)

M4 - shrimp, cauliflower, ghee, olive oil

You know, having IBS, CFS and hormonal imbalances are normal for me right now. I have been dealing with bowel irregularity, puffy eyes, inconsistent energy, mood swings, and food addiction for so long I can't expect that in the first week of this trial all of it will magically disappear, or that the Whole30 will be a panacea for everything. Food is important, but so are the other practices I am keeping. Instead of focusing on what is going wrong, I am going to write a list each day of what went right.

What is going right:

Libido is strong

Energy is more abundant than before

I am experiencing less severe symptoms in my life

My sleep is Ah-mazing! I have been an insomniac since tweenage

Today Peter and I had a disagreement and I didn't rip his head off. I was actually able to hug him afterward. Nice change. Jekyll is slowly fading away.

Today was a craving free day (completely effortless and satisfying!)

I have a bit more confidence after weathering the past two days

My curves are starting to become more defined

My abdominal area flattens a bit more each day

When my energy is high it is not artificial or manic

My skin is so clear and beautiful! I love it.

I had a really great day today. I am so glad for the challenge of yesterday, truly. I feel as if I met the craving and stood my ground. I have a new appreciation for the fact that these things don't last. Feelings don't last. Cravings don't last. I feel stronger, and a little less terrified that I might not make it. I just keep telling myself I can.

[Rojo]

Day 12

I love waking up in the morning. Sleeping 8 to 10 hours is really helping my life.

M1 - Homemade turkey patty, sauteed greens in EVOO, 1/2 of avocado

M2 - Homemade turkey patty, 5 grilled shrimp, juiced veggies

M3 - Larabar, iced green tea (this was on the go...I was having blood sugar issues from eating too little and leaving too much space between meals. I don't make Larabars a habit.)

M4 - 1 cup or so Turkey Veggie chili, cauliflower, EVOO, garlic salt grinder, 5 olives

I went all day long...organizing, cleaning, errands, more cleaning, preparing dinner. It was wonderful. I felt really good about myself today. Today was not challenging at all. I am learning though that I need to plan better on my busy days. If I don't eat enough at meals, and go go go, I get stressed and funky things happen in my body. I find I get low blood sugar symptoms too.

Feelin' good!

[Rojo]

Day 13

M1 - sauteed greens in EVOO, turkey chili, green tea

M2 - Oriental yam mashed under three fried eggs in EVOO, pepper and garlic salt grinder, bone broth

*2 mile hike/yoga

M3 - Shrimp, cauliflower, EVOO, garlic salt grinder, pineapple/mango blended with coconut milk, nutmeg and lemon, decaf americano

Great day today. Lots of pep. Ovulated. The hike was beautiful. Not many words, because I am getting ready to eat.

Hair, skin, nails, energy, bowels, ovulation, sex drive - all great!

Stellar day.

Oh, woke with a sore throat this morning. Not a word of it since. I think my eating lifestyle is kicking its ass. Yay! We shall see.

[Rojo]

Day 14, almost halfway.

M1 - Shrimp, EVOO, cauliflower, green tea (I'm out of ghee, and my favorite shrimpies just don't taste the same.)

*coffee

M2 - Can of sardines, pumpkin puree w/coconut milk and pumpkin pie spice (was lunch time, had this in car on the way to our hike)

*2 mile hike

M3 - Chili, Cauliflower, maybe some fruit...not sure yet. Having a hard time thinking, as it's time to eat. I've been active, and I know my fuel supply is low. It was only a two mile hike, but there was some climbing involved - pretty steep and lengthy, for me at least.

I am sitting here right now and I know I did not eat enough before the hike and afterward...my blood sugar is low.

The hike was beautiful. My morning was glorious and...stable. I felt really stable all day long. My stomach has flopped the other way, but that happens regardless of the Whole30, so I have to be careful about pinning it to this experience.

My sleep was so awesome last night.

I had energy after church today to go on a spur of the moment hike. (normally I get home and sack out on the couch in exhaustion.)

My anxiety did not keep me benched today. When I eat this way, I still have anxiety, but it's like I can work through it more effectively and face things...use all the tools and knowledge I have about how to deal with anxiety and depression (The past three or four Sundays I have been completely ready to go and the absolute horror of being around so many people, and feeling trapped, set in. I hate for my kids to see me like that.)

My skin is clear.

My stomach is not bloated or gassy (normal things that usually carry on around ovulation.)

I feel my passion is not dampened

I can feel myself more optimistic in my head about living

The virus I woke up with yesterday is obliterated. Normally if I wake up with those symptoms, I am sure to go full blown outbreak.

Food. Hot bath. Sitting in front of the fire reading. I could really go for some scotch right now - an nice, warm, golden, aromatic glass of scotch. Mmm. Tea will have to do for now.

[Kaleena]

I love hiking, lucky you! It's too cold in Toronto right now for any of that I can't wait to have a drink again. I'm not even a big drinker (glass of wine on weekends) but it's just sooo nice!

It's so glad to hear that you are seeing the benefits!

[Rojo]

Ta-dah! Day 15. Halfway!

7 am - Homemade turkey patty, sauteed swiss chard, chai tea

10 am - off to play date...a little hungry, which is strange for me. Had a hard boiled egg/10 olives/chai tea to go

1 pm - Stopped at home really quick and grabbed 10 Brazil nuts and drank some water

1:30 - Americano (I thought I'd be home sooner - should have brought along a banana/hard boiled egg or something. We did not get home until 4:30.)

Dinner - Turkey chili, brocolettes, EVOO, 10 olives, jasmine tulsi tea

I was on the go, and feel I was not that great at fueling my body today. I really felt it by 4:30. But even with this behavior my energy was through the roof. I enjoyed my time out. I did not get cranky, and I was still able to approach dinner sanely. I feel really great right now.

I really can't believe the pace I kept today. It is astounding. Normally on play dates I am so tired and can't wait to get home to my safe spot. Today I actually volunteered to take another trip out. I am so happy!

My sleep cycle is phenomenal. I am actually feeling that fuzzy, sleepy feeling each night right around our set bed time. I am actually starting to get stingy with my time in the evening, because I look forward to shutting everything off, unwinding and getting in bed. I used to dread my bed. I woke today, gently, at 6:30. It is really wonderful to feel as if I actually slept the night through.

I had a dream I was pregnant last night. *shivers* My best friend of 16 years who died a year and a half ago was in my dream too. She was so real, so full of life. We were at the beach on a sunny day. Today was hard. I thought of her a lot. I don't let myself think too often of this, because it really hurts. I had to suck it up, when really I wanted to pull the car over and cry a bit. Gosh, I miss her. It was all so sudden.

I am entertaining tomorrow night. I am an awesome baker, but I've given it up. I do lots of other things well. I can buy take out desserts and charm everyone with my smile and presence. I will say, having a delicious looking carrot cake in the fridge is not cool. Ugh. Really not cool. Baked treats are my thing. I'm not big on frosting in general, but this is cream cheese frosting - so light, tangy, sweet and creamy. I am also a huge fan of a fully chocked spice cake. Okay, my mouth is watering. I want to make love to the cake with my mouth right now. I'm not kidding. I'm good with my mouth...my body can attest to this fact. Shut it down. Shut if down, Carrie.

[Rojo]

Day 16

M1 - 3 fried eggs over half baked sweet potato, coconut oil, black coffee

*coffee date, green tea

M2 - One and a half 'breaded' pork chop, banana, bone broth (Got swollen glands and throat after coffee date)

M3 - 2 hard boiled eggs, broccolette w/sea salt and garlic grinder

*apple cider vinegar in herb tea, sleepy tea

The carrot cake has been sent off, as well as the creamers and half/half. I'm so tired right now (an hour past my bedtime. Everyone just left) and fighting another bug. It has not run amok yet, so I am hoping the same protocol as Saturday works: rest, bone broth, tea and apple cider vinegar.

Super tired...body is fighting hard not to get this ick.

A freaking fabulous day otherwise!

I am in it to win it now.