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Confessions of a non cross fit foodie


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I have never done cross fit in my life. I may be the only creature on this forum that hasn't, so I am a fish out of water. Or the black sheep of the group, but hey... what's new?!?

A brief hello:

I am about 80# overweight, but still walk and talk like i'm the svelte size 5 I was in college. The hilarity of this, of course, is that I never give my hips enough room and am constantly knocking shit over with my ass. I met my husband on Match.com. We just got hitched, and are delving into the "when to start a family" stage. I am a goal oriented woman, and have overcome a lot of challenges-> Paid off all of my debt, saved an obscene amount of $ for our wedding, quit smoking... to name a few.

Now the goal is health. Some of my quirky ailments include, but are not limited to: I cry, a lot. I cried during the tour de France, I cry at commercials. It's dumb, and I hate it. I am in a epic battle with my eyelids. I have a Chalazion right not, and two styes, in the same eye!!! It's reallllly fugly. I was diagnosed with rosacea; with poor diet, stress and alcohol contributing to the flair ups. AKA I am allergic to my life. BALLS. I shed hair like a wookie. My nails have been very thin and break for as long as I can remember. Bloating is normal. I'm not even going to enlighten you with my BM's. My family owns a restaurant and I work in food service. I AM CONSTANTLY AROUND AMAZING FOOOODDD. And wine. I'm probably a wino too.

The holidays were kind of rough. I was very emotional about what happened in Connecticut, and decided to unplug from all media... Only to return the day after Christmas to get punched in the face with the details on what happened in West Webster, a neighboring small town. I was a blubbering basket case complete with snot bubbles. My husband is a police officer, and I get kind of freaky when ever he puts on his bullet proof vest. That week I drove by countless groups of fireman and police officers traveling to our area to pay their respects... And I cried my eyes out each time, for hours.

So- here I am on day 9. I am not shedding as much hair, and I haven't cried in 3-4 days. I am sleeping better, and not putting my husband in a scissor lock every night, or burying him in comforters. I must admit, I have been in the "kill all the things" stage for about... years... That first week I was... pretty... crankypants. I wish I had been chronicling my food experiments. I have made some awesome eats! I hope to keep track of my edibles moving forward :)

Speaking of forward, a few things that have kept me marching forward:

One of the most discerning customers I have stated: "I don't want you to feel like I'm just trying to be nice, but you most certainly have lost a noticeable amount of weight."

A very respected coworker, who is wearily looking into the whole30, made the comment that my back was smooth as a board! (You must too understand I don't get on a scale, I weigh myself by the amount of backfat I have... LOL) BLAM! DADADA DADADA

I assure you, all future ramblings will be food related.

Good bye :)

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Keep on keepin' on. Great to hear of the successes so far !!

For the record-- I don't exactly even know what Cross Fit even is. Haven't even looked into it, and I have been here on this forum since August !

And, I am totally cool with that.

Working hard at my Whole 30 ( actually doing a Whole 100) and exercising every day- all makes me a happy camper.

Hang in there !!!! :D

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Also a non-cross fitter! I live Ina rural area, definetly not in high demand. Instead we mostly take walks and work out a bit at home. It's nice that there are more people doing W30 who dont do CF. we gotta stick together!

So glad you're feeling better. I'm hoping this will help with my emotions too, at least a little. Good luck!

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So- I was thinking today about when I actually DID work out to some sort of organized program... And it brought back fond memories of my Mother, sister & I attempting to follow along to some 80's VHS Richard Simmons tape... Eventually falling over each other into a giant heap of giggling sweating non-coordinated cuddle puddle. Awesome. That's back when tight rolling your pants was rad. O.o

Bkfst- 3 organic eggs, 3 homemade sausage patties, tonic with a slash OJ

L- organic greens salad with blackberries, raspberries, strawberries w/ raspberry red wine vinegar & sesame oil

D- I asked the chef @ my families restaurant to cook up some of my tenderloin tips, and do some garlic mushrooms w/ olive oil. He gave me charred resemblance of beef with deep fried mushrooms. I think we can all agreed that he was very fortunate I did not punch him in the throat. Lazy #&)@*)&

D#2 chicken apple "stir fry" not my fav recipe, but edible, compliant and fast.

I started my first batch of dijon mustard, YAY! I also went through the door of my fridge... claiming much needed space and jars for things I can actually eat. I pulled out some meats for the week, not to figure out what to do with some lamb, sirloin tips, chix, and attempt to make my own cocktail sauce.



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A very respected coworker, who is wearily looking into the whole30, made the comment that my back was smooth as a board! (You must too understand I don't get on a scale, I weigh myself by the amount of backfat I have... LOL) BLAM! DADADA DADADA

Thanks for the laugh! :lol:

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Awesome log! (Another non-crossfitter here. I've read and read about it and I still can't figure out what the hell it even is.)

I would totally sweat to the oldies with you though. It would be uncoordinated and icky and way fun.

Yer funny. Keep writing.

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I woke up this morning, and got out of bed fairly rapidly to de-holiday the house. I should note here, that I am a grizzly bear in the morning. My mother is, my grandmother is. We could all wake up at the crack of noon and be perfectly OK with that. Telemarketers don't even call me before 10am, let alone the poor souls that actually LIKE me. Back to the point--> I slithered out of bed in under 10 minutes around 9am, and was up and down the stairs with totes to start bunking away Santa and the elves. My husband, in a state of shock exclaimed "what cannon did you shoot out of this morning?!?!" Quite impressive I must say, considering I don't drink coffee anymore. (No one believes that BTW... but it's true.)

B- Cinnamon chili porkloin. Banana, strawberry, kumquat & coconut milk smoothie. (Yeah I know, freaking weird right?)

L- Larabar. Tonic w/ splash OJ

D- Shrimp cocktail. Sirloin tips over greens w/ orange peppers & red wine vinegar/oil. And all the little tastes and tidbits of my food prep for the week.

My normal days off are Tuesday & Wednesday. Sometimes I take Thursday for giggles, like this week :)

So, I made a few things to get me going for the work week and keep me on track...

2 jar salads, both with mixed greens and an assortment of veggies and fruits

Ketchup & Cocktail sauce

Cilantro & Watercress Pesto

Finished up my Dijon Mustard, which I literally want to roll around in... really

Chicken drums w/ onion & fresh ginger

Used up the rest of the sausage I made in an Arugula, tomato, sausage Egg bake. Should be 4 days worth of B or L.

I have been seeing Kombucha noted around here a lot, and BEHOLD Wegmans had 2 flavors on tap at their tea bar! So, I tried the berry... and it was OK. They had several different varieties already bottled. The first one I picked up had a quote on in from a woman that live in my town; in the cart it went. I got 2 other flavors, all compliant :) The woman at the tea bar was very concerned... and was sure to tell me NOT to drink the whole bottle and trailed off... Of course I had to mess with her and ask if I'd crap my pants. She was very... Polite ;) LOL

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Here is a link to a topic I started about cocktail sauce, there are a few links for recipes. I made one of the ketchup recipes, although i think my tomato paste has super powers or something as I didn't get much other flavors... Good Luck!!

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So here I am, at some ungodly hour in the morning. Naturally because I am already getting phone calls from work. My hours are 12-9... so... early morning phone calls mean 1 of 2 things: the place burnt down, or people are calling in sick. The strange part is that, I'm awake. I am hoping I don't crash when I have to drive home @ 9!

Oh- and I confess. After I finished the previous post, I devoured a small dish of fresh organic pear, mixed nuts & coconut milk.

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B- egg, sausage, tomato & arugula bake. Banana, pear & cinnimon smoothie for the road.

L- Jar Salad w/ cilantro dressing, a few beets & applesauce.

I brought a bunch of stuff to work today for the week... which I am finding is not quite enough. I have a mini fridge in my office, so that helps. Why do I have a mini fridge you ask? Because some poor soul stole/ate/threw out this foodies only meal of the day: scalloped potatoes and ham... I had a full blown adult temper tantrum of epic proportions. Hence when I walked in the door the next day with my mini fridge, my boss shot me a look over her glasses and told me not to put beer in it :ph34r:

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D- ended up being very late, and lazy... warmed up some compliant turkey kielbasa with some of my homemade dijon. I didn't want to chow too much as I knew I'd be going to bed.

Here I am again... phone ringing off the hook O.o Oh glorious sleep, how I miss thee!

Confession: I feel the need to shave my legs. WTH does that have to do with whole30??? EVERYTHING! There are several reasons why I choose not to shave my legs.

#1 It's time consuming. I am the in the shower/ out the door in 15 minutes flat kind of woman.

#2 I like the feeling of the wind, very refreshing... ladies you should try it

#3 God put it there

#4 I could give a rats a** about social expectations. Who made that rule anyway... a dude? no thanks

#5 I shave, when I want to feel sleek, smooth, naughty & sexy. It's time consuming pampering, not a requirement. Translation : my birthday. my wedding day. when I get a wild hair.

#6 It is a potentially life threatening chore. Let me explain. When you are... large; it becomes more difficult to reach your feet. So, me... in a tub... trying to reach my ankles is like trying to bend one of the blow up shamoo whales in half. What happens? It snaps back open! This in turn results in me, sliding on my back like an overturned turtle from one side of the tub to the other, resulting in a tsunami across the entire bathroom. Whereas the dog thinks we are having a slip and slide party. Fantastic!

Back to the relevance: During my bath last evening, I realised that I was sitting upright, holding my ankles... comfortably. DANG GUURRL!

That's it. I'm shaving my legs. Why? Because I'm feeling pretty sexy. This chic is going to be walking around with SWAGGER All. Day. Long.

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I only read this because I had to figure out how this log had so many replies in just a few days. Now I get it. I love your sense of humor and your approach to life. Please don't leave us!

On a more serious note, I just remind you to stick to the template. I noted several meals where you didn't log any protein. You need 1-2 palm-sized portions per meal. Smoothies aren't acceptable because we have to chew our food, and fruit should be limited to no more than 2 servings a day. It seems your vegetables are heavy on the salad greens. I'd love to see you put some variety in there as well. I roast carrots, broccoli, and/or cauliflower in coconut oil with herbs and spices to bring to work, because I enjoy them cold and can throw together a quick meal that way. And Lara bars are only for absolute emergencies when you can't get access to real food and are in danger of fainting dead away from lack of sustenance.

For the record, I feel very much the same about leg shaving.

PS. Have never set foot inside a Cross Fit gym, despite having much younger, much healthier, much skinnier, much fitter friends try to talk me into joining their 5 am class.

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Thanks for the input Marryann! I have not come across the actual "template" but I assumed that was in a book that I don't have? Is there a link somewhere? I had previously only eaten 1 meal a day... so this three meals thing is kind of... a pain in the balls.

I fully understand that 1 meal a day sucks and am committed to changing my behavior, however I am giving myself a little wiggle here -> aka smoothies, otherwise known as liquified food i would normally eat but can't.

I drive at LEAST 2 hours a day, so many times if i'm going to eat it, said substance must be in my to go cup... otherwise the meal is skiped entirely; then I eat like a Rhinoceros.

I cook using primarily coconut oil, olive or seseme oil & ghee (although the ghee I have has a weird funk to it?)

I had the Larabar for the first time ever... and it will do for the drive home on one of those days that I simply did not get to eat during work, which is usually 2 out of 6 O.o

B- egg bake from the other day. Green kryptonite snot: giant handful mustard greens, kombucha, 1/2 pear 1/2 apple. My husbands face was priceless.

L- Chicken tit w/ dijon mustard, hard boiled egg, 3 medium beets, 6 mini peppers (red yellow orange)

D-? we'll see what happens by the time I get home.

I do find that I don't feel as hungry, and am actually feeling FULL. That's right. A new feeling for this gal. I could pound down some serious eats and not feel full. Now I do :) Sweeeeet. I don't feel the need to snack, and that is HUUUUGE. (Fucillo huge, people of WNY)

Again, Thanks for the constructive input! And if one of my friends asked me to get up at 5am, they would probably either #1 duck #2 run as fast as possible in the opposite direction. But the reality is, they wouldn't DARE! 5AM OMG. PHFFFT.

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