Day 10, feeling worse

[superinkie]

This is going to be a book, so here is the short: 35M who was dubious about Whole30 feels worse than when he started (and he was pretty stinkin bad before we started). How soon till he sees results. Do some people not see positive results because they are just so so so unhealthy at start point?

We're on day 10 of our first round. We're a family doing it together (35M, 32F, 8yo, 7yo, 3yo, 1yo). I'm (mom) the primary instigator and person organizing and reading up on stuff. My husband is in very poor health. Depressed, bad sleep, likely starting stages of sleep apnea, obese, always exhausted, etc. He's miserable. And it's been getting worse. So I convinced him to do Whole30. He primarily wants to lose weight. It's all he can think about. He's absolutely focused on that. Unfortunately, he doesn't agree with the scale rule so he's been checking and it's been fluctuating, but he isn't losing so he's discouraged. (Yeah, I know this is why you aren't supposed to check, but he's a grown up and I can't stop him). 

Diet pre Whole30 was no breakfast, maybe a coffee in the morning at work, sandwich or microwave meal or maaaaybe leftovers for lunch but other nothing for lunch either. Supper would be meat heavy, with carb side: potatoes, pasta, bread, etc. It was often homemade, but he eats virtually no vegetables. The very very occasionally plain lettuce with dressing salad, or boiled carrots or peas. That's about it. He's an extremely sensitive sensory person with extreme texture and flavour aversions. Highly sensitive to bitter. 

Then in the evening it was unfortunately often ice cream, chips, whole boxes of Oreos, popcorn, a soda, energy drinks, candy.... Etc. Aka, tons of cravings and difficulty regulating. 

He was also up to at least one energy drink per day, often two. They didn't give him any sort of "boost". They just made him feel just slightly less awful. Even in the evenings. Caffeine has no noticeable affect on him. It doesn't make him more "awake" or "alert". 

So, he cut all that cold turkey for Whole30. No energy drinks, no chips, no pop, no ice cream, no candy.... Not even his chewing gum. But then he started getting wildly nauseas in the morning. It used to be that he just wasn't hungry. Now he's so nauseous in the morning that the idea of chewing something makes him want to puke. He has absolutely no enjoyment from anything food related. He hates eating. I know they aren't ideal, but I've started making smoothies for him in the morning in an attempt to just get SOMETHING into him. He's trying to eat but everything has no joy for him. He feels more tired and more depressed and more run down than he did before we started. 

He's eating more vegetables than he used to, but we still aren't getting to half a plate. We're using more potatoes than are likely ideal because I'm trying to just cook ANYTHING he can tolerate. 

Is it going to improve? Or is Whole30 not realistic without the veggies and with lots of potato? Should I keep pushing him through or is this just not possible for someone with as limited eating habits as he has? I keep telling him we just have to push through, but I'm afraid I'm wrong.

[ShannonM816]

Maybe try peppermint or ginger tea in the morning to help with nausea (it can be hot or cold, whichever he prefers). He does need to eat. Between the not eating in the morning and the focus on weight loss, I would guess he may not be eating enough, which is going to contribute to him feeling tired and run down. 

Potatoes are fine. Is it possible to eat too many? Sure. But if what gets him to clean up his diet and eat less chips and ice cream is potatoes, it seems like a good trade off, and a stepping stone to more veggies later, when he's ready. 

Whole30 can still work for him, but he's really going to have to put some effort into it. Maybe have him find Whole30 recipes he'd be willing to try, or go to the store and pick out a vegetable he thinks might be interesting to try. You can cook all the healthy food in the world, but if he won't eat it, there's not really anything you can do to force him to, that's something he has to decide for himself. Sensory issues certainly make it harder, but they can be dealt with, and if they're what's holding him back from having a healthy diet, it might be worth having him talk to a doctor or therapist about them, but even with professional help, he'll have to work on it, so it really needs to be something he wants to do.

[SugarcubeOD]

Just want to mention also that it's not that surprising that he feels poorly... he cold turkied his massive sugar addiction and energy drinks in one shot... that combined with the detox that can accompany the first 10-12 days of the program must be tough!

Second, not sure if your husband is a logical type person but maybe it would help him to know that the reason he feels nauseous to eat in the morning is because his hormones are disregulated. The only way around that is through it so if that information does help him, maybe he can mentally power through a bit more.  Also, since smoothies are working for him, maybe try blended soups? It's the same texture so that might be a good detour in to savory breakfast items and once he's feeling a bit more regulated, start adding protein. 

Everyone's Whole30 is going to be different depending on their context so please don't get discouraged that this 'won't work'. Eating real whole foods in appropriate quantities at appropriate durations during the day and NOT eating a box of oreos at night IS success. What he may want is immediate results and weight loss but maybe work on setting up some other success indicators in the meantime.