How young is too young?

[little_muffin]

My eldest daughter is 31/2 and is extremely resistant to any change in her diet, i think she is verging on vegetarian. I have been trying to swap her over slowly but she wants bread, pasta, processed meats etc. My question is should I just leave her diet alone for a bit and let her get on witheating what she wants? When I try to swap it over she generally doesn't eat at all

[ladyhoward]

I don't think 3 1/2 is too young to make changes to her diet - in fact, the early the better. I know it's a struggle - this forum section is full of posts similar to yours so you're not alone in that. Every child is different in what works and what doesn't, but I'd certainly keep at it. The less stressed you are about the swap and the more excited she can see you are about what you're eating, the easier it may be. And if she doesn't eat what you put in front of her, it's okay. She'll eat when she realizes that she's out of options. It doesn't have to be the battle of the century, but I also don't think you should just give in and give her what she wants.

[Emily]

Lady Howard said good stuff, especially the earlier the better. "Food with no brakes" applies to everyone, even young kids...

[Mom2A&M]

It has been a real struggle. My son does not eat meat, I have to force every tiny bite. He just turned 3 & my daughter is 19 mo. I have been trying to get us healthier but so far only cut out sugar snacks and carbs. So he still eats yogurt, milk, fruit, some bread and peanut butter. I can't figure hw we get rid of Mac n cheese and nuggets...the kid won't even eat a hotdog or ketchup. I figure even if we make baby steps and it takes a year to convert, well, that's still many more future years of healthy eating and less struggle down the road. It's a fight worth fighting

[little_muffin]

Thanks everyone. I loosely started a paleo diet 2 years ago and have been trying to make the switchwith her sincethen with extremely little progress. The difficult thing is family too, if she's spending the day with nana, she'll get everything to eat. Like you Mom2A&M I have to force EVERY bite. I guess 80-20 is good, if I can control what she eats 80% of the time, the rest will come on it's own

[MrsStick]

This isn't good for adults, but perhaps making a paleo version of the favorite foods? Start with maybe a cheesy cauli bake for mac and cheese, and making your own nuggets with almond flour for the nuggets? Plus that way you at least are controlling some of the scarier ingredients and know the quality of it!

I'd recommend phasing those meals out generally, just go a longer time between times having them (even if it's a day or two at first and increasing to once a month or so).

[Mom2A&M]

Yes little_ muffin, I stopped worrying about grandmas house...it usually consists of Cheetos, doughnuts and sugared strawberries. I know how exhausting it is too, and how many times I just want to give up. I just keep thinking that we have many more years of this so as long as we move forward every little bit or bite helps.

Mrsstick....I have been slowly doing this but he is way to smart for my own good. He can sense a change is his food a mile away! Just a little puréed spinach in his soup, you can't taste it, you can't smell it but he knew and didn't eat it! Also my husband in not on board and thinks " this is what kids eat, it's normal." So I don't even control all of what's in our household. I'm not stressing about it , just doing what I can.

[Moluv]

It's so hard with kids because they can't correlate what they ate with how they feel or behave, so there is zero motivation for them. I notice such a huge change in their behavior wen they have grains and sugar- not so much other stuff like legumes. But I am also fighting against clueless, over indulgent grandparents and a public school program that serves grain/sugar laden breakfasts IN THE CLASSROOM as part of the schoolday. I just do the best I can with the kids and make a point to mention to them whenever they are fighting or overly emotional something like "oh, this is so sad that you are feeling angry/ sad right now. When mommy eats doughnuts (or whatever they had) I feel the same way, but when I eat meat and vegetables I feel happy. Maybe you will make better choices at your next meal". It seems like a lot, but my 6 year old has started connecting the dots and I know my 2 1/2 year old will too. Because really food IS a personal choice, even for growing children. I think teaching that connection that food=feelings will go a long way as they grow.

[Noelle]

My son is 5, and the thing that has helped the most as we phase out less-healthy options is giving him unlimited access to the healthy things he will eat. For him, that's lots of eggs, green beans, and fruit. (He likes almost all fruits, and would probably try to live on fruit alone if I let him!) Recently, he's discovered baked sweet potatoes—but it took me serving them many times before he decided to try them.

Also, every kid is different, but mine really likes really simple foods. Cauliflower mixed into a mild curry? He won't touch it. But I've seen him gobble up plain roasted cauliflower.

I try to make a big, dramatic fuss over the healthful foods I'm eating ("Wow, this stew is delicious! The carrots are so sweet and the lamb came out perfectly!") and my husband will join in. Even if our little guy doesn't eat it, I figure it's good for him to hear us raving about how delicious things are.

[Robin Strathdee]

Hi all! I never tire of this topic- It's as close to my heart as possible.

There are two really important lessons I've learned in my 5 years of parenthood:

1. If you don't advocate for your child, no one else will.

Especially when it comes to food. I've had many conversations with friends, grandparents, educators over what my children eat in their care. It's been my experience that these folks genuinely want the best for your kids and aren't intentionally trying to undermine you. I've found that a kind attitude and a heart-felt request go a long way. Explain that, while you understand that they are just trying to show affection for your child, you really feel that these foods are negatively impacting their health. Right now, you're trying to identify the cause of some problems and you can't do that if those foods aren't completely eliminated. Let them know, gently, but firmly, that your children have X restrictions now and that you really appreciate their help. Be willing to pack food for them to eat, talk to teachers and classroom aides (most parents would LOVE to see healthier snacks in school - no one thinks a cupcake is healthy). Stand up for your kids' health and I think you'll be surprised at how much good you'll see come of it.

2. Your children will learn their outlook on life from you. If you act defeated, they will too.

I know from experience how hard it can be to make this change in your kids' life when there are so many factors that seem to work against you. But trust me, if you give in to the "it's too hard" and "I can't control it" excuses, your kids will too. Show your kids that their health is a priority! Show them that there are always obstacles, but that they are WORTH the effort. This will carry over to their attitudes toward their own health as they get older. I kid you not, my 3 year old passed up a make-your-own sundae line at a birthday party in favor of pineapple because she remembered how much of a stomach ache she had after a cupcake at school. Teach them to prioritize themselves, teach them to overcome challenges.

[Mom2A&M]

It's a work in progress! Thanks.