abur0418 Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Not really sure how to start....two weeks ago I started my first Whole 30. I feel like a failure but this weekend I ate and drank some things that were not compliant. I am really struggling with whether or not this is really for me. There's no where else I can really go to for support. My family and friends just think I'm crazy since 1) I'm not overweight, they actually make several comments about how I am 'too skinny'. I feel I am just where I want to be. 2) I am not really unhealthy and in my eyes I am only doing this for the mental and emotional benefits (which they do not really know about). My fiance just tells me to do whatever makes me happy. I am struggling between doing the Whole 30/commiting to change disordered eating habits, and the pressure and anxiety that is caused when I have to stray outside my comfort zone at a social event, or when my schedule doesn't allow me to eat these three timed perfectly portioned meals. I wonder if it's even worth it if I'm avoiding social events and fun times with my friends. Is the stress that is caused by possibly going off track making my disordered eating and anxiety about food worse than the benefits I would receive by completing a full 'Whole 30'? I guess that is the root of the question. I am not sure what advice I am looking to get on here but I figure it was somewhere to start. Right now it's Sunday and I have a week of Whole 30 compliant meals planned but who knows what will happen when the weekend comes. Should I give this another try? Or take a more laid back approach in order to limit stress and anxiety about food? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xacerb8 Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 As someone who has struggled for a long time with anxiety and emotional eating, I can tell you this, it really is up to you whether this is "too stressful" or not. If you decide that it is, it will be. If you can change your thoughts about it, the feeling (anxiety) will evaporate. As an example, when you say, "Maybe this isn't for me," it probably triggers all kinds of other thoughts that make you feel miserable and anxious. "It's going to be like this forever." "Nothing will work for me, even though it works for other people." "I am beyond help." Each of these thoughts builds on the next and leaves you feeling....well, horrible, right? I would encourage you, to try changing your thoughts ever so slightly. For instance, "I did two whole weeks! I can make it through just one weekend." "I am doing this because I deserve to feel healthy and strong." "It will be a fun challenge to see how I can get through the weekend." "It's only about making one good choice at a time." I think if you can counter some of the "worst case scenario" thoughts, you will have more positive feelings, and this energy is what is going to power you through the challenging times. If you tell yourself, "I can't," then you won't. It really is that simple. (though annoying to hear) Good luck. You can do it. You want to do it! Somewhere inside of you is a voice that is telling you that this is the right path. It's scary, I know, but you can do it. Tell yourself, no going back -- I have to get through! And you will. Promise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abur0418 Posted February 25, 2013 Author Share Posted February 25, 2013 Thanks, this is good advice. I think I did try to do the 'one day at a time' and 'one choice at a time' kind of attitude, and I consciously chose to go off plan this weekend. Turns out that after, I wasn't okay with that decision. But I know that every day is a new day. You're right that I've been thinking really negative thoughts about the whole thing; probably because of negative feedback of the people around me. I will try to change my thoughts into positive, and go into this week with a positive outlook and look at it as a 'challenge'. Thanks for the response. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moluv Posted February 25, 2013 Share Posted February 25, 2013 A year and a half ago my nutritionist was encouraging me to eat a diet almost identical to the whole30, and I wasn't ready yet to deal with family and social settings and not drinking and not having treats. I would say I've been about 80/20 since then and have experienced tremendous improvements in my mental state (especially since eliminating gluten 5 months ago and also going long stretches with no sugar), particularly in bringing my ADHD symptoms to a perfectly tolerable level (going off meds too!) and not having a temper anymore. I was still eating grains (rice & corn), sugar in the form of raw honey, and alcohol and when I found the whole30 a month ago I was ripe for change. And by "ripe" I mean bloated and tired and foggy brained and as soon as I read the outline of the plan I KNEW I WAS READY AND EMBRACED THE CHANGE. My point here is that going off the rails is no setback, no failure. The seed of true wellness has been planted in you and one weekend can't kill it. Be excited for a new Day 1, no matter how many Day 1's you have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyS Posted February 25, 2013 Share Posted February 25, 2013 I'm glad you got some encouragement from xacerb8 (who has the best username on the internet, by the way). I would add that it sounds like you do have some in-person support from your fiance - you don't say much about him, but his saying he wants you to do what makes you happy sounds like he's a sweetie. More specifically, a sweetie who wants to support your choices in life, including what you eat. It really does help to think of it as just thirty days, if the whole concept is too overwhelming. I think I kind of put a bubble around myself that first Whole30. On day 31 I may or may not have RUN into Sbux for a fancy sugary drink. Haha And look, no lighting bolts fell from the sky, I'm still here! Heehee Other folks may have good intentions when they say things that feel hurtful; but ya know, you've got yourself a fiance who wants you to be happy. That'd be the outside voice to listen to, I'd say. The other ones can just chill. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyS Posted February 25, 2013 Share Posted February 25, 2013 A year and a half ago my nutritionist was encouraging me to eat a diet almost identical to the whole30, and I wasn't ready yet to deal with family and social settings and not drinking and not having treats. I would say I've been about 80/20 since then and have experienced tremendous improvements in my mental state (especially since eliminating gluten 5 months ago and also going long stretches with no sugar), particularly in bringing my ADHD symptoms to a perfectly tolerable level (going off meds too!) and not having a temper anymore. I was still eating grains (rice & corn), sugar in the form of raw honey, and alcohol and when I found the whole30 a month ago I was ripe for change. And by "ripe" I mean bloated and tired and foggy brained and as soon as I read the outline of the plan I KNEW I WAS READY AND EMBRACED THE CHANGE. My point here is that going off the rails is no setback, no failure. The seed of true wellness has been planted in you and one weekend can't kill it. Be excited for a new Day 1, no matter how many Day 1's you have. Moluv for president! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moluv Posted February 25, 2013 Share Posted February 25, 2013 Moluv for president! Aw thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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