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Not one to miss out on ANYTHING, I did a nice stretch of regular W30, IBS protocol and Autoimmune protocol. Each phase (totaling @75 not quite consecutive days) facilitated more healing than the one before. I went from being constantly bloated, in stomach/intestinal pain, tired, irritable, moody, scatterbrained to only rarely bloated, even more rare pain, stable energy all day, even tempered and focused. I feel mostly calm and happy and able to cope with the little stresses life gives without blowing my top or turning to a stimulant/relaxant to deal. I weighed 159 when I started (I'm 5'7", large frame) and my weight is now fluctuating between 151 (when I'm not bloated) to about 155 (post nut binge, mostly water weight I believe). I'm wearing most of my same clothes, though they do fit better. I was really hoping to lose a significant amount of weight and in my mind's eye feel like weighing 120 lbs would make me some kind of superhuman godlike figure, but alas, my body is happy and healthy at the size it is and I've finally come to accept it. It was very powerful for me to see that even during an extended period of eating right that I stayed close to the same size- meaning I wasn't that far off the mark to begin with. I do look better when I'm excercising more, but it doesn't have much of an impact on my size or weight, I just look better. I love to do power yoga, bikerides, and gardening as well as hiking and doing manual labor involved in building an earthen home in the country and I feel like I have more energy, stamina and focus for all of those activities. I don't feel as hot or as cold, nor do I feel as irritated by the incessant winds of the plains. I've learned which foods drag me down and which ones lift me up as well as the way sleep, stress and play factor in to my overall well being. It starts with food, but doesn't end there indeed. My husband and two kids are happy to eat this way mostly with calculated offroads, and as a family we finally have a cohesive "kitchen style". Shopping, cooking, packing lunches, everything has been made easier by removing food groups that aren't nutritional powerhouses.

Going forward, I intend to continue eating 3 meals a day following the template and adding in a few of the foods recommended by the Weston A. Price/Nourishing Traditions style, like raw milk cheese and kefir (as long as I tolerate it well), soaked or sprouted nuts, and possibly soaked (nongluten) grains like white rice or polenta, but I view those as winter/holiday foods only and have a while before I try that. I also want to drink coffee with real cream, and alcoholic drinks of good quality. I won't worry about oils or sauces when eating out as long as I'm not being served grains. My go-to foods will continue to be the things that made me feel great on the AIP- namely butternut squash and grassfed ground beef or lamb. Eating that for breakfast 4 days a week in place of eggs will probably do a lot over time to continue to allow my gut to heal while not leading me to feel deprived. And, oh, did I mention I plan to eat an enormous quantity of bacon over the next few days :P

Some things I'm worried about:

Bacon :wub:

Other sugar cured meats, which are convenience foods that I can rely too heavily on and miss out on key nutrients in fresh meat

Drinking more than I want to, one drink a couple nights a week could easily turn into 2 drinks 5 nights a week (where I was 3 months ago)

I'm not really worried too much about chocolate or nuts because I have always eaten those things with abandon and like I mentioned above, had not really affected my weight. (I always weigh 160 after the holidays, it's grainsbloat) so if I want to eat an entire bar of good chocolate dipped in cashew butter, well, I'll just plan on wearing my looser fitting clothes for a coulple days after- it's really not the end of the world. I can't say how grateful I am to get that whole behavior into perspective and be rid of the shame that so many feel. I believe our biology is designed to feast on those types of tastes (the book mentions it!) and doing so occasionally cannot be that damaging.

This is an exciting journey and I'm grateful to continue to be a part of this wonderfully supportive community!

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Powerful insights and great plan! Congrats!

That sense of awareness and peace is profound. Can you imagine how much people would pay for a pill that would give them that? Ha!

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Powerful insights and great plan! Congrats!

That sense of awareness and peace is profound. Can you imagine how much people would pay for a pill that would give them that? Ha!

Thank you LadyM, that is a great compliment!

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Congratulations on coming to terms with your body finding it's happy weight - that's such a tough one, hey. Even though we look and feel better, that damn voice in our heads can still pipe up with "you'd look and feel even better at xx weight" (although, do you honestly think 120 would make you look anything other than hungry??).

I think I'm going to cut out eggs for a week and just see how that goes for me (having just eating a bowl of scrambled eggs...) as my puku (tummy) has been a little puffy for the past 3 weeks or so after jacking up the egg consumption to 3/day. Off to buy some mince to try different breakfast options.

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Congratulations on coming to terms with your body finding it's happy weight - that's such a tough one, hey. Even though we look and feel better, that damn voice in our heads can still pipe up with "you'd look and feel even better at xx weight" (although, do you honestly think 120 would make you look anything other than hungry??).

I think I'm going to cut out eggs for a week and just see how that goes for me (having just eating a bowl of scrambled eggs...) as my puku (tummy) has been a little puffy for the past 3 weeks or so after jacking up the egg consumption to 3/day. Off to buy some mince to try different breakfast options.

I would not only look hungry but I would be an emotional wreck. I know. I've been there. Happy to finally say I NEVER WANT TO GO BACK.

I found the AIP short term to be very healing for me- I ate eggs today with NO negative effect that I could notice and they used to make me really really tired. I love browned beef and puréed root veg or winter squash- it matches the texture of scrambled eggs well.

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What I ate today:

Meal 1: 3 cinnamon apple breakfast links (pasture raised, noncompliant-cane juice) 2 eggs scrambled in ghee all over a bed of spinach and arugula

Meal 2: bone broth soup with butternut squash and balti curry, 1/2 chicken breast

Then I had an iced coffee with half n half (obvsly non compliant), drank about 2/3 and saved the rest for tmrw

Meal 3: 4 slices prosciutto panfried wrapped around baby kale and a small thing of tropical applesauce, handful of soaked and dehydrated almonds and one bite of cocoa coconut butter thing I made for the kids

Meal 4:

1 1/2 chicken breast roasted with asparagus and zucchini and herbs and coconut oil with roasted garlic homemade mayo, a homemade whiskey sour (obvsly noncompliant)

My thoughts on my two trips to the coffee shop- even though I'm happy I'm not having physical problems with having the dairy in my coffee I am having political/philosophical confliction with the fact that the dairy comes from factory farms. Not only is it less nutritionally viable due to ultra pasteurization, the factory farm model has dire consequences for the economy, the environment and small raw producers who cannot fight with the lobbying power of Big Milk. I vote with my dollars and those coffee shop votes were for the wrong ticket. Soooo, the next time I go to the health food store I will pick up some local grassfed (still pasteurized) cream to go in my French pressed fair trade coffee.

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I ate eggs today with NO negative effect that I could notice and they used to make me really really tired.

Seems I have surpassed my egg threshold by eating homemade mayo last night at dinner and for lunch today. I have such incredible muscle weakness about 10 minutes after lunch- and brainfog, and cranky :(

What's worse is I can't pin this on eggs alone because I have eaten nuts, coffee, milk, nightshades, alcohol and honey in the last 72 hours. Way to rock those reintroductions lady. So really what I have done now is spent the last 3 months of my life eliminating and am not any closer to knowing for sure if there is something I can add back. Grrrrrrr.

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What I ate today:

Meal 1:1 apple cinnamon breakfast sausage, ground lamb, can't remember what vegetable (or none maybe?), leftover iced coffee with half n' half

Meal 2: cold leftover chicken breast dipped in roasted garlic mayo- utterly delicious but I got so so tired and muscle weakness shortly after eating. I also felt really easily irritated. Lost some productivity during the day but dragged myself outside to do yardwork after a little rest and wallowing, also had a cup of tulsi tea with a little sourwood honey

Meal 3: (after spending 2 glorious hours in the sunshine doing yardwork) cole slaw (compliant, with purple cabbage, carrot, pineapple and vinegrette), baked golden yam (the best tasting sweet pot ever). I kind of knew eating raw cabbage after nuts and eggs was a recipe for disaster, but I think I underestimated the volume of gas that a little bowl of cabbage could put off, man oh man- went to the ballet with a couple of girlfriends and, to quote Lindsay Lohan's character in Mean Girls, "I felt like my stomach was going to fall out of my butt". It was distracting and I was uncomfortable because my belly was bloated and didn't like being pressed on my a tight pair of jeans for 2 hours sitting in a chair. After the ballet we went to see my brother's fun cover band at a (thankfully smoke-free) bar and my friend and I both drank little cans of grapefruit juice and a cup of water. And we danced. A little. Then our stick in the mud friend showed up and we danced less and then I just thought oh, if I could be home passing gas freely and eating a golden yam with ghee in my leggings and slippers and no bra I would be so so happy. So we left. And I was right.

Meal 4: 1/2 small can wild planet salmon with 1/4 avocado and drizzled with fish sauce, 1 1/2 golden yam pre-baked then sliced and heated in a glob of ghee. After heating through there was some crud stuck to the pan so I removed the yams and poured a little water onto the hot pan to deglaze all that carmelized buttered yam goodness. hrghggherhghge it was so so good. Those golden yams have rocked my world. I'm already planning to chat up the produce guy at the store tomorrow and request a steady stream of those. they are firmer and less stringy and waaay less sweet than an orange sweet pot.

My kids had a sitter tonight and I had laid out a dinner for them to choose from and their sitter brought over a box of strawberries and some grapes for a treat after dinner. I was really glad that she "gets it" with the way we eat. She did allow a friend to deliver a "slushy" to her and I was proud to hear that the boys did not even ask her to have any or even what it was. She said they weren't even interested.

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Sunday Cookup/what I made:

Slow cooker roasted whole chicken (stuffed the cavity with an apple, ginger and cinnamon and s&p on outside) with 4 heads of garlic roasted alongside

Took meat off bone and separated the garlic from the skins- used garlic skins and chicken carcass to make broth in the same slowcooker- added some Great Lakes gelatin as well

Covered garlic with olive oil and sea salt and sealed in a 1/2 pint jar for an alternative to mayo

Baked 8 sweet pots

Combined 2lbs pastured pork sausage (non-compliant, added sweetener) with 1 lb each of ground chicken and ground lamb and 2 shredded zucchinis. Stored in the fridge for a weeks worth of breakfast at the ready.

Made Kombucha gelatin gummies

Made "larabar bites" with soaked and dehydrated almonds and cashews, dates, coconut oil and dried apple and pumpkin pie spice- amazing and far less sweet than storebought

Made a condiment of cilantro, crushed pineapple, green onions and olive oil in the food processor

What I ate today:

Meal 1: golden yam, ghee, canned salmon, avocado, fish sauce, hydrangea black tea with a bit of sourwood honey

Meal 2: raw goat cheese, Kombucha, larabar bites (homemade), later a cup of French press with heavy cream

Meal 3: roast chicken with a sauce made from the reduced pan drippings, herb de Provence and heavy cream (pasture raised but pasteurized), golden yam with ghee and roasted garlic and pumpkin pie spice, cilantro mush.

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Sounds like a delicious day. Love that condiment idea with the cilantro and pineapple. Have a bunch of cilantro in the fridge and I might so something similar. Mm.

What are the proportions of your Larabar bites? I bought some dates (and ate a bunch) to make some up for my kids. I've seen a few recipes online but I don't want to waste groceries on a not great recipe.

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I used a small food processor and added a big handful of chopped dried apples, a couple big handfuls of soaked and dried nuts (almonds were peeled), a big handful of pitted dates, a hefty pinch of pumkin pie spices, and a few glugs of melted coconut oil and just processed that till it all sort of "went back into itself" if you know what I mean. Then I pressed the mixture into silicone ice cube trays and chilled. Correction: the first batch the kids and I ate straight out of the food processor bowl while watching Transformers cartoons on Netflix.

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I hope you still enjoyed the ballet somewhat? What did you see? I wonder if I can find golden sweet potato, can you instagram it?

Any luck taking FCLO without thinking of immediate death after?

To answer your last question first, no I cannot. But, "just a spoonful of honey helps the medicine go down"~Mary Poppins

The ballet was the local company's performance of "Cleopatra" which was violent and beautiful. The female lead was a little thick waisted and big bottomed (like me!) which has just confirmed what y'all said about the idea of the tiny dancer is only a stereotype. Granted this wasn't world class ballet, but she was enchanting all the same. But my gas and pimples did impair my fun for the evening. I feel waaaaay better when my body is highly functioning and I am quickly realizing only AIP foods can do that. It's going to take some time to wrap my head around the kind of diet that will serve me best long term, and right now I am suffering through symptoms while simultaneously mourning the fact that I probably can't eat cheese unless I want to look like Humpty Dumpty :(

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Here is what I ate today:

Meal 1: Lamb/chicken/pork sausage mix, sweet potato, pan sauce, coffee, heavy cream, scoop of FCLO and honey

Meal 2: more sausage/zucchini with bone broth and cream sauce, Kombucha

Meal 3: (in the car) raw goat cheese (about 2-3 oz), bread and butter pickles, Kombucha

Meal 4: chicken garlic broth

I got really tired and kind of nauseated after the cheese and pickles and the skinny jeans I had been comfortable in all day suddenly became very uncomfortably tight. I have no idea what compound in cheese has the power to shrink denim in a matter of minutes but that is some powerful stuff!

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I know it's not funny, but I can't help myself, your line about denim is hilarious. Cheese has superpowers against the human body, fact. I can tolerate only aged raw cheese. Funny fact - imported real deal has almost no impact, while local cheese made supposedly following the same technology gives me all kind of nasties swollen feet included, itch and breakouts included. I don't miss cheese anymore. Almost.

I am in the same boat where I have to tweak more, but my brain resists like a 5 year old. As someone said, this means I am not sick enough. We'll get there.

Beauty of a dancers is in the way they carry themselves and the way they "metabolise" the music. Perfectly built body alone doesn't do the job. Just like here, skinny does not always equal healthy. They should add dancing to the favorable activities list.

What about eating a slice of lemon/lime right after?

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What I ate today:

Sausage zucchini mix, coffee and cream, big spoon of FCLO chased with raw honey

One closed handful of soaked and dehydrated mixed Brazil's, hazelnuts and macadamias

Ground beef and mashed golden yam with ghee

Sausage/zucchini mix, one big bite of canned asparagus (yuck)

Chocolove milk chocolate bar and a Kombucha

Felt a little better today, less puffy. Reworking my never eat/ eat sometimes lists. Adding eggs and cheese to the never eat list. Maybe for good. Cannot do that to myself again for a long time. Has caused a stress response that has made me very short tempered and spaced out too. Hate it. It's a feeling that I have found vaporizing to restore some feeling of homeostasis, however that medication comes with a host of negative side effects. I'd like to avoid all of those feelings and I feel like eggs and cheese can easily joing grains and HFCS as things I can live without. I do feel like full fat cream is well tolerated and will keep it for now. I also think the damage from coffee and chocolate are not noticeable unless I've ha eggs with. I don know. I'm going to keep chocolate, coffee and sweetenings as options for now until I'm ready to eliminate and test them.

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I am eager for and dreading my fCLo. I ordered it through a natural mamas listserve (I'm prob the least groovy person on the list bc my kid is in public school and we don't live on a farm but I do what I can do) I'm on and the woman I got it from is taking her time to send. I got the capsules because I'm a wimp and the cinnamon tingle for when my w30 is over and I can have the bit of stevia in it.

I am not looking fwd to finding out I can never have eggs or cheese again. That would make me sad. Grains, legumes, ok. Cheese? There would be tears. But I'm glad you're able to sort this all out despite your worries it would be confusing after eating a bunch of things you hadn't been eating.

And I am not believing you about your big bottom, etc. I looked at your Instagram and you look thin and well-proportioned. Maybe that's just an old image you have in your head? I don't know your history but I tend to have a lag whenever I'm going from smaller to bigger or reverse. I see the old me and not what's in front of me.

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I am eager for and dreading my fCLo. I ordered it through a natural mamas listserve (I'm prob the least groovy person on the list bc my kid is in public school and we don't live on a farm but I do what I can do) I'm on and the woman I got it from is taking her time to send. I got the capsules because I'm a wimp and the cinnamon tingle for when my w30 is over and I can have the bit of stevia in it.

Oh, Beets, I think you often forget to give yourself points for simply EXISTING in NYC. I said it before, but the pressure you are under in that environment is not to be underestimated. And with kids. ! I have such an easy life where I live. And cheap.

One time during my W30 I tasted my FCLO gel and thought it tasted really good. My tastebuds had changed and I thought I didn't need the honey anymore. I didn't keep taking it because of the milk protein and I was on aip. When I tasted it now a few days ago, I think it is starting to turn, or something. Chocking it down three mornings in a row (with a honey chaser or not) has made me feel like I've really accomplished something for the day. It's intense!

I am not looking fwd to finding out I can never have eggs or cheese again. That would make me sad. Grains, legumes, ok. Cheese? There would be tears. But I'm glad you're able to sort this all out despite your worries it would be confusing after eating a bunch of things you hadn't been eating.

Oh, I am definitely planning on eating cheese again. Just not before a time when I need/want to look/feel my best. My symptoms are not debilitating and I think spreading those kinds of foods out over time does diminish their damaging potential. But the next time I feel the urge for cheese coming on, I will stop and ask myself if having 4 huge pimples, a spare tire, and gas for days is really worth it. It's really shocking to see the visible swelling of what I believe to be localized inflammation around my intestines- not just a poochy postdinner foodbaby (which is perfectly fine, comfortable and even cute), but this swelling goes around my lower back too, so puffy. And it lasts about 3-4 days. I used to have that all the time and only was smaller every because of several consecutive days of undereating. What is liberating about w30/aip is that I've learned I don't have to undereat to shrink down a bit, I just have to avoid the irritants. That way I am well fed and my brain and muscles function, but the puff goes away. That is a great thing I could not have learned without so many restrictions at once. Eggs be damned.

And I am not believing you about your big bottom, etc. I looked at your Instagram and you look thin and well-proportioned. Maybe that's just an old image you have in your head? I don't know your history but I tend to have a lag whenever I'm going from smaller to bigger or reverse. I see the old me and not what's in front of me.

AWWW you looked at my instagram?!?!

You know I only post the flattering pics, right? :ph34r:

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What I ate today:

Meal 1 started out as ground lamb and butternut squash (my AIP standby) unfortunately several bites in I detected a sour taste and stopped eating it, but it was too late. My stomach turned, I got lethargic and weak. I threw up :(

Later I had some gingery seaweedy chicken broth and a handful of soaked mix nuts. The lethargy was crushing and I made a beeline for Starbucks as soon as I was out. I decide to go "all in" and ordered a hazelnut machiato with whole milk. I was perked up temporarily but yawning desperately 2 hours post. Coffee is a trap. I love it. I love the syrupy gooey $6 jobs.

I went grocery shopping after at a different, larger store than I usually go to and I quickly realized I was on autopilot. Scoping out the organic veggies, breezing past aisle after aisle of sugarcornconcoctions. The only thing I bought differently than w30 shopping was some cured meats (of high quality) and some dairy (grassfed, pasteurized cream, cultured cream and goat butter). I was delighted to find sprouted almonds in the bulk bins for a good price.

Lunch was panfried Serrano ham (dry cured, imported from Spain, omg better than baconx100) with baby greens and a dab of cultured cream. Also carrots.

Then I had a Kombucha because I was krashing.

Dinner was fresh smoked salmon on baby greens with a dill kefir dressing, cherry toms and carrots. In hindsight this meal was a little fat light as well as the sugar I'd had contributed to feeling peckish which is unusual, but not one to go hungry I pecked away at a handful of sprouted almonds, a fig and another slice of Serrano ham. Seriously considering more ham.

A major high point of my day was making an impulsive trip to the dance wear store to try on leotards and lo and behold the instructor for the class in signin up for was in the store and I met her. The owner of the store also teaches a weekly drop-in all level class which I will be able to attend next week! I bought a lovely black leotard and pink tights but have to go back for the shoes as they had more styles than I had time to try on. I feel very confident about how my body looks in the leotard and I'm over the moon about starting a month before the other class starts. It was kismet!!

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I am literally jumping on my office chair while I read it. Plie! When you buy dancing shoes make sure to take ones with elastic strip inside the shoe. They are also called pre-curved. Helps the form of the point. I have these ones.

Not so excited about your stomach troubles though.

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Oh, Beets, I think you often forget to give yourself points for simply EXISTING in NYC. I said it before, but the pressure you are under in that environment is not to be underestimated. And with kids. ! I have such an easy life where I live. And cheap.

You know I only post the flattering pics, right?

Life is stressful here. We are all eager to leave the city but to where? There is a direct fall-off in commutability (vis a vis mental health) at the exact point where we can afford something. My husband needs to work here so we are limited in our options. But I do dream of a house with grass and wildlife. My poor kid said to me the other day walking up this dirt path, "I like this way because there is more nature."

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And, yeah, the flattering pics. Zis is why I have no recent selfies, as the kids say, on FB. Still I think you are being too critical. Bravo on the dancing! That takes some guts, I think.

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I'm not going to list out my food today because it basically amounts to this: w30 compliant meals PLUS a little cream, butter, or cultured cream as fats.

What I really want to talk about is an exchange I had during what has to be The Best Massage I've Ever Had. I tried a woman next door to my office and was beyond pleased with her professionalism, her techniques and attention to detail. I felt supremely cared for. I had requested in the paperwork for not too much talking and we did chat a little at first, and then got quiet. I can't really remember how it happened but the topic of food intolerances, or hormones or something came up where despite my best efforts, I could not stop myself from telling her about w30. She is apple shaped (which can be dangerous) so when she mentioned weightloss or something, I felt obligated to "Preach The Gospel". I did my best to convey the concept of gut irritating, hormone imbalancing foods, metabolic derangement, insulin resistance etc. while making sure to take the focus away from JUST losing weight. I could here the tone of her voice change, the energy in the room changed. I think she was crying. I was face down. But there was a noticeable change. I really got her by describing the scenario in ISWF where they describe the typical day on a SAD diet. I didn't make any mention of foods, I just framed it as if there is metabolic derangement....have a hard time waking up, not being hungry in the morning, being hungry after eating, energy slumps, wakefullness at night. And she just got really quiet and said "you just described my every single day". She went on to say that other clients of hers were health conscious and tried to give her ideas to lose weight but that something about what I was describing to her sounded totally different to her. and....logical. We talked a lot more about her, and me, and how even though our bodies look different on the outside that our symptoms have manifested as attacks on different organ systems (me nervous system, her endocrine) that we were both victims of a food system that wreaked havoc on our bodies in a similar fashion. She is an incredibly talented body worker who clearly puts a lot A LOT of energy into healing other people and caring for her family, while not putting as much energy into her own healing. I made sure to throw in some heartfelt compliments, rebooked and tipped big. She did mention that she "wasn't ready" to make a big change to her diet (which is grain heavy she said) and I'm not going to bring it up again, but I hope she does.

One more thing that got us both pretty fired up: She shared a story of several years ago suffering such extreme fatigue after childbirth and asking her doctor about it. He said postpartum depression, she said no I'm not depressed. They went on and on like this until she finally started anti-depressents. Then, she had a 6 week long period following bouts of no period. She went back to him demanding answers and he just said "It's a wonder that whole thing [reproductive system, female body?] ever works anyways, you just don't know what to expect" WOW. She never went back and weened off the anti-depressants finding some relief from a naturopath that addressed her hypothyroidism an MD wouldn't even acknowledge.

Another thing I want to take note of is a late night mini-anxiety attack I had just as I was drifting off to sleep last night, which I am blaming squarely on the sugar I had (possibly corn syrup now that I think about it I don't know what the Starbucks syrups have in them). Anyways I was drifting off to sleep and woke up really fast with a tight chest, accelerated breathing and this totally irrational thought about worrying about paying my car payment (which is not anyting I would ever worry about in waking life as it is set on auto-pay). I was awake only long enough to be aware of it, get my breathing under control and curse Sugar to the depths of hell. I think next time I am in the mood for Starbucks I'll stick to a plain breve. But I am feeling like going in there and asking for an ingredients list for the drink I had just to see if it is sugar or corn syrup, because even though the consensus around here is sugar is sugar is sugar, I feel differently about hfcs as it has some kind of nefarious chemical component that I (nor my kids) can handle in even small amounts.

And we bought a goat. And found a stray dog that we want to keep.

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